australia94 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Can't believe I'm writing this post. Since I first went to Australia in 1993 I have wanted to move and live in Perth. Despite a few hurdles I was granted my visa along with my wife and kids 2 years ago. We went out last year to validate the visa and loved it. I handed in my notice back in February and left my job as a teacher yesterday. At the end if the day I had the rest of the staff and kids were in tears and I had so many parents thanking me for all the work I had done with their children. It struck home just what I am leaving behind job wise. With only five weeks until we leave I should be excited and full of joy but instead I am full of dread and worrying about whether we are doing the right thing. I've just left a job I love, I'm taking my kids and wife away from all our family and friends. Our parents and grandparents are all beside themselves, and I feel like a regular A hole. I don't know if its just after 20 years of trying I am finally nearly there or if it's something more. I feel like I'm stuck on a roller coaster travelling up waiting for the drop. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vanduex Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Also a teacher. Also finished yesterday. Also leave in 5 weeks. Scary stuff!! Head down and push on. It's normal. 'Wobble' is a common word in our house. In my head, it is almost impossible to consider getting this far and then never trying it. :-) Pulling out out would mess my head! Have to see it through. Thats my stance. I hope it helps a little :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MARYROSE02 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Take a look at this list of the top stress-inducing situations and total up your score. I am going to score myself in a minute too. [h=2]Adults[edit][/h]To measure stress according to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, the number of "Life Change Units" that apply to events in the past year of an individual's life are added and the final score will give a rough estimate of how stress affects health. [TABLE=class: wikitable sortable jquery-tablesorter] [TR] [TH=class: headerSort]Life event[/TH] [TH=class: headerSort]Life change units[/TH] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Death of a spouse[/TD] [TD]100[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Divorce[/TD] [TD]73[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Marital separation[/TD] [TD]65[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Imprisonment[/TD] [TD]63[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Death of a close family member[/TD] [TD]63[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Personal injury or illness[/TD] [TD]53[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Marriage[/TD] [TD]50[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Dismissal from work[/TD] [TD]47[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Marital reconciliation[/TD] [TD]45[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Retirement[/TD] [TD]45[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in health of family member[/TD] [TD]44[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Pregnancy[/TD] [TD]40[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Sexual difficulties[/TD] [TD]39[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Gain a new family member[/TD] [TD]39[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Business readjustment[/TD] [TD]39[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in financial state[/TD] [TD]38[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Death of a close friend[/TD] [TD]37[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change to different line of work[/TD] [TD]36[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in frequency of arguments[/TD] [TD]35[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Major mortgage[/TD] [TD]32[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Foreclosure of mortgage or loan[/TD] [TD]30[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in responsibilities at work[/TD] [TD]29[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Child leaving home[/TD] [TD]29[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Trouble with in-laws[/TD] [TD]29[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Outstanding personal achievement[/TD] [TD]28[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Spouse starts or stops work[/TD] [TD]26[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Beginning or end school[/TD] [TD]26[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in living conditions[/TD] [TD]25[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Revision of personal habits[/TD] [TD]24[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Trouble with boss[/TD] [TD]23[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in working hours or conditions[/TD] [TD]20[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in residence[/TD] [TD]20[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in schools[/TD] [TD]20[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in recreation[/TD] [TD]19[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in church activities[/TD] [TD]19[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in social activities[/TD] [TD]18[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Minor mortgage or loan[/TD] [TD]17[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in sleeping habits[/TD] [TD]16[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in number of family reunions[/TD] [TD]15[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Change in eating habits[/TD] [TD]15[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Vacation[/TD] [TD]13[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Christmas[/TD] [TD]12[/TD] [/TR] [TR] [TD]Minor violation of law[/TD] [TD]11[/TD] [/TR] [/TABLE] Score of 300+: At risk of illness. Score of 150-299: Risk of illness is moderate (reduced by 30% from the above risk). Score <150: Only have a slight risk of illness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MARYROSE02 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Illness and sleep difficulties affect me for a start! For you, getting ready to emigrate, well there are a few on the list?! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MARYROSE02 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Warming to my theme, I found another list, and I am interested in it for my own benefit. I am going to see my psychologist later on this morning (24 July) and I will probably discuss some of these issues. Stress! Stress! Stress! Back to Articles What causes all of this stress? Top Ten Tips on Managing the Stress in Your Life By Julienne B. Derichs LCPC Stress is a commonplace fact of life. It is caused by the need to adapt to the many changes that we are confronted with in our day to day lives. How you react to these experiences determines the impact stress will have on your life. Stress has become a factor in our culture in the last 20 years because of things that were originally designed to make life less stressful. Conveniences such as ATM machines, microwave ovens, and fax machines have made life easier in many ways, but they also have woven an expectation of instant gratification into our culture. And this causes stress. Top Ten Stressful Life Events 10.Retirement 9.Marital problems 8.Being fired from work 7.Marriage 6.Personal injury or illness 5.Death of close family member 4.Birth of a child 3.Marital Separation 2.Divorce 1.Death of a spouse Most of experience stress from four basic sources: Environment: facing too many distractions, traffic, pollution, and noise. Social Stresses: E-mail, vague or confusing expectations, having to do unpleasant tasks, or meeting deadlines. Physiological: poor nutrition, being sick, not getting enough sleep, or not enough time to relax. Thoughts or Beliefs: “Always” and “Never” thinking, catastrophic interpretations of your experiences, the assumption those things are “done” to you, “Should”, “Must”, and “Ought” or Absolute thinking. How You Know When You’re Stressed? Stress can manifest itself in both physical and psychological symptoms. Below is a checklist of some of the most common symptoms. Check all the ones that apply to you. Physical Symptoms: Headaches (migraine or tension) Backaches Tight muscles, muscle cramps Neck and shoulder pain Jaw tension Nervous stomach Nausea Poor sleep Fatigue, lack of energy Diarrhea Teeth grinding Digestive upsets Heart beats rapidly or pounds, even at rest Appetite change Psychological Symptoms: Anxiety Depression Confusion or “spaciness” Irrational fears, feelings of helplessness Compulsive behavior Forgetfulness Feeling “overloaded” or “overwhelmed” Feeling you can’t slow down Mood swings Loneliness Problems with relationships Unhappy with work Frequent irritability Frequent guilt Temper flare-up Crying spells Evaluate your stress level as follows: Number of items checkedStress level 0 – 4Low 4 – 8Moderate 8 – 12 High 12 – 18 Very High Top Ten Tips on Managing the Stress in Your Life 10. Acceptance This includes the ability to accept and cope with setbacks. Ask yourself “How do I let myself make mistakes”? 9. Sense of humor Humor creates lighter atmosphere and helps to put things into proper perspective. Can you laugh at yourself? 8. Social support A solid support system is at the core of effective stress management. Look for opportunities to spend more time with people and in situations that make you feel good. Look for ways to increase time with them. 7. Create a non-toxic environment Some people and situations have a toxic effect on you. If you can, limit the amount of time you spend with them. Take a look at your home or work environment and ask yourself “Is it chaos or calm here”? 6. Sleep routine Create a sanctuary in your bedroom. Keep your bed for sleeping. Read in a chair Remove TV No eating in bed Set a bedtime that allows for 7-9 hours of sleep per night and stick to it. 5. Manage the conflict in your relationships Identify the sources of stress in your relationships. Write about them in a journal. Make a list of people who cause you stress and explore what the issues are. Resolve the underlying issues. For each of the situations identified in step 1, assess what steps you could take to resolve the conflict. Make a list and design a plan to improve the situation. Learn skills to improve relationships. Relationship skills are learned. We are not born knowing how to get along well with others, and most of us learned only limited skills from our parents. You can learn these skills by reading a book, taking a class, or working with a counselor. Mini-breaks Schedule 5-10 minute periods to relax during the day. 3. Low stress eating A healthy body is better equipped to handle the stresses in life, and good nutrition is the foundation of good health. Cut back on fats Limit caffeine and sugar Eat a variety of foods Eat slowly Concentrate on eating Eat frequent and calm meals Drink in moderation 2. Regular exercise The human body was designed to be physically active. However, many of us are inactive for a large portion of the day. Exercise is one of the simplest and most effective ways to respond to stress. 1. Breathing awareness Remember to breathe! Most of us hold our breath when we feel stressed. The lack of oxygen going to the brain causes an increased stress response. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Can't believe I'm writing this post. Since I first went to Australia in 1993 I have wanted to move and live in Perth. Despite a few hurdles I was granted my visa along with my wife and kids 2 years ago. We went out last year to validate the visa and loved it. I handed in my notice back in February and left my job as a teacher yesterday. At the end if the day I had the rest of the staff and kids were in tears and I had so many parents thanking me for all the work I had done with their children. It struck home just what I am leaving behind job wise. With only five weeks until we leave I should be excited and full of joy but instead I am full of dread and worrying about whether we are doing the right thing. I've just left a job I love, I'm taking my kids and wife away from all our family and friends. Our parents and grandparents are all beside themselves, and I feel like a regular A hole. I don't know if its just after 20 years of trying I am finally nearly there or if it's something more. I feel like I'm stuck on a roller coaster travelling up waiting for the drop. Not to worry, nothing is forever! Give it a go, if it works you win, if it doesn't you move on. Selfishness is a pre-requisite for migrants, along with a healthy dose of self sufficiency. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tina0101 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Know exactly what you are going through and I think it's normal judging by a few recent posts on PIO from people heading out in the next few months. With 35 sleeps til we leave, I am majorly freaking out. I still want to go, it's just the fear of the unknown. But taking the plunge is better than wondering! my husband got a lovely leaving card that said "a ship in the harbour is safe, but that's not what ships are built for". Sums it all up perfectly for me. Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zk2102 Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Yep, as of yesterday I am unemployed! I'm a (was a HLTA). Daunting isn't it? OH yet to hand in notice till we exchange, but, boy dies it feel odd. BTW, as Tina says, your in good company, few of us leaving these shores at the same time. Seems we're all from the same region also! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pumpkin Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Can't believe I'm writing this post. Since I first went to Australia in 1993 I have wanted to move and live in Perth. Despite a few hurdles I was granted my visa along with my wife and kids 2 years ago. We went out last year to validate the visa and loved it. I handed in my notice back in February and left my job as a teacher yesterday. At the end if the day I had the rest of the staff and kids were in tears and I had so many parents thanking me for all the work I had done with their children. It struck home just what I am leaving behind job wise. With only five weeks until we leave I should be excited and full of joy but instead I am full of dread and worrying about whether we are doing the right thing. I've just left a job I love, I'm taking my kids and wife away from all our family and friends. Our parents and grandparents are all beside themselves, and I feel like a regular A hole. I don't know if its just after 20 years of trying I am finally nearly there or if it's something more. I feel like I'm stuck on a roller coaster travelling up waiting for the drop. Life doesn't have to be broken to justify the move. You have had twenty years to think about this and I am sure in that time you have thought long and hard about this. The only time I worry for a would be migrant doing the right thing is when they start posting about this "better life" or worse the "UK going to the dogs". You haven't done that, so steady the nerves and look forward. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
australia94 Posted July 23, 2014 Author Share Posted July 23, 2014 Thanks for all the replies. I think what threw me so much is having parents of the children thanking me for all the work that I have done over the years and the impact they feel I have had on their children. Also had my Grandad in tears today as it was my daughters birthday. He's 85 and has always supported us going. He gave my daughter her present then took himself outside. I went out to see if he was ok and he was sat down crying, before saying that it is probably the last time he was ever going to be able to do this. It was heart breaking to see a man that was and still is a father figure to me so upset. Sat down and spoke to my wife this evening, she's kicked my butt so I'm feeling more positive again. Going to make sure that the next five weeks are action packed and have already invited my grandparents and parents on lots of trips so that my girls have loads of fond memories of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacaranda Posted July 23, 2014 Share Posted July 23, 2014 Whatever you are going through right now is temporary.Life always is!You're sort of in the in between stage right now,winding down your "old"life,anxious about starting your new life,so I would just go with the flow.Ask yourself "Whats the worse that can happen"?You have based your decision to emigrate on the knowledge you had at that time.Its never going to be a mistake!Its not nice to know you're upsetting people by moving far away,I have to face this again soon when I leave Sth Aust,leaving my elderly Mum behind,probably won't see her again and yeah that hurts alot!Best wishes,sounds like you'll be missed!Thats a good thing right?It would be a worry if you were'nt!lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 24, 2014 Share Posted July 24, 2014 Thanks for all the replies. I think what threw me so much is having parents of the children thanking me for all the work that I have done over the years and the impact they feel I have had on their children. Also had my Grandad in tears today as it was my daughters birthday. He's 85 and has always supported us going. He gave my daughter her present then took himself outside. I went out to see if he was ok and he was sat down crying, before saying that it is probably the last time he was ever going to be able to do this. It was heart breaking to see a man that was and still is a father figure to me so upset. Sat down and spoke to my wife this evening, she's kicked my butt so I'm feeling more positive again. Going to make sure that the next five weeks are action packed and have already invited my grandparents and parents on lots of trips so that my girls have loads of fond memories of them. It may be the last time, or it may not! Just plan for lots of visits and he will probably be giving her presents until he's 95! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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