Wishful Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 Some people know my story in brief , came here when I was 18 now 44 , been back to UK on many occasions. Have two Australian children aged 12 and 14 and remarried an Englishman ( childhood sweetheart ) .... I dont dislike Aus just really want to go home , money is tight at moment and so not an option.. one of my children sees himself as English my daughter as a true blue Aussie ( though she liked England when we visited ). I cannot concentrate on day to day things I am always trying to work out ways to get home I dont know what to do I feel so trapped and down..just want to go home or at least be able to go home for substantial amounts of time on a regular basis .... ( Olympics not helping but its always there ). Anyone feel the same , in the same position would value ANY advice ! PLEASE no anti English stuff just would like some advice - thank you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sol2Oz Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 Hi wishful - If you were in Oz since you were 18, maybe it's not necessarily being in Oz vs. the UK that is bringing forth the homesickness, but something else that you're feeling - maybe some other need that is unmet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twinsmom65 Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 Sorry to hear about your dilemma. Why not try and set up a small savings account and call it trip to UK fund. I know it's hard when money is tight (been there many a times myself). Also the lack of concentration could also be linked to some type of depression. I know when I was depressed, all my thoughts and energy went on thinking about Canada and how I could get home, It sounds like you have a great family, and your wish to go to the UK will happen, it might take a little longer but where there is a will there is a way. Cheers Karen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wishful Posted August 5, 2012 Author Share Posted August 5, 2012 Hi wishful - If you were in Oz since you were 18, maybe it's not necessarily being in Oz vs. the UK that is bringing forth the homesickness, but something else that you're feeling - maybe some other need that is unmet. Hi there , No its not honest I am happily married two lovely kids doing a job that is satisfying I know how lucky I am .... I am just not home that's all plain and simple. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wishful Posted August 5, 2012 Author Share Posted August 5, 2012 Sorry to hear about your dilemma. Why not try and set up a small savings account and call it trip to UK fund. I know it's hard when money is tight (been there many a times myself). Also the lack of concentration could also be linked to some type of depression. I know when I was depressed, all my thoughts and energy went on thinking about Canada and how I could get home, It sounds like you have a great family, and your wish to go to the UK will happen, it might take a little longer but where there is a will there is a way. . Cheers Karen Yeah I had thought about the depression thing but I think when I feel down its linked to the UK nothing else.... I am setting up a savings account and yes I agree where there is a will there is a way ...... thanks. I appreciate everyones thoughts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jhampa Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 It might feel like your depression is caused by you not being in the UK, but I dont think that is the root cause. I think if you woke up everyday and rejoiced about the good things in your life right now, whatever they may be. That would be a long term permanent solution to how your feeling. A trip to the UK might only work in the short term. Try to wake up and think about your family, the fact you have food shelter and company. THink about the billions of people who dont even have these things. Try to be grateful for what you have every morning and slowly slowly you will start feeling good about your life again, there wont be room for depression. This would be a long term solution. Change the way you think, not the external conditions. We are always trying to change out external conditions, new car then i will be happy, new house then i will be happy, new tv they i will be happy, new country then i will be happy.. thats what we all do........... it might work for a short time but its not a long term solution. It takes alot of work !!! just my thoughts.. :em3900: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MARYROSE02 Posted August 5, 2012 Share Posted August 5, 2012 If 'home' is the solution to all your problems, and assuming your family are happy to go, then returning MIGHT make you happy. But you could go back and still feel unhappy. Maybe go and see your GP, see what he/she thinks, ask about getting a referral to see a psychologist. If you doctor refers you then you are entitled to a big discount through Medicare. I see one every month who charges $120 but I get $85 back from Medicare. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nickyc88 Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 Hey, sounds like you're having a really rough time. My partner is up and down and from time to time says he wants to go home, but I always tell him it won't be the life he left... the economy is different, we don't have a home there and people move on with their lives. We're also different people, even after such a short space of time. I understand the 'displaced' feeling but I suspect I'd have that in the UK too now. Hope some of the comments you've had on here resonate and help a bit. Good luck x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blobby1000 Posted August 6, 2012 Share Posted August 6, 2012 You could get yourself a loan and pay it back from the UK once you get home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest63690 Posted August 10, 2012 Share Posted August 10, 2012 Wishful, my heart goes out to you. While I understand what has been advised regarding appreciating what you have. Yes it is true that you are lucky in being happily married, having a great job and family life, but we are more than the family bubble. You are a person with needs and desires in your own right, and you are right to be paying attention to them. Many years ago I read a book (I cant remember what it was called, written by david smail) anyway it was written by a psychologist who used to work for the NHS. He would conduct deep psychological work with his depressed clients, and sometimes put them on medication, and then occasionally they would stop coming. He would ring them up to find out why, and they would suddenly announce they were not depressed anymore (because they had moved house and got a garden, passed their driving test, met someone special, etc). He then accepted that sometimes people become depressed because of external factors, and when they changed their circumstances they changed their happiness levels. I am sure you already appreciate all the wonderful things in your life, but if you feel something is missing, then listen to that feeling and hopefully in time, you will find your way back home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.