ena Posted August 2, 2011 Share Posted August 2, 2011 would anyone like to talk about being { parent left behind ) either P M or otherwise. If it is appropriate to do so. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Linday Posted August 2, 2011 Share Posted August 2, 2011 Hi Has your family just moved to Oz. I know it must be very difficult for you. Is there any chance you could join them at all? Have you looked at the parent visa options? If not, then there are some visitor visas which allow you to stay in Oz for up to a year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ena Posted August 2, 2011 Author Share Posted August 2, 2011 thanks for your reply Linday. No my son has been in oz for 15 years. I still miss him badly but i know he is happy, so what more can i want. I am looking into the possibility of joining him but i am just at the looking stage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted August 2, 2011 Share Posted August 2, 2011 Well, sort of. I left my parents behind, never gave them a thought really and they made the most of it and came here for 6 months every year for 15 years. My own son went back to UK for a gap "year" coming up for a decade ago so he is on the other side of the world. I make the effort to go home once or twice a year and catch up with him and my elderly parents and would happily stay in UK for ever but it wouldnt be because I was chasing him around the globe, it would be for me and what I want out of my life. I have another son and two grandkids here and would feel just the same way about leaving them - my life, my goals, my interests, they can have theirs and I am not responsible for them. I wouldnt chase my kids across the world, they could just as easily up sticks and move to somewhere else and the older you get the harder it gets to find a niche, get a support network, learn how things happen and you run the very real risk of being isolated and dependent on family and quite out of touch with all that you have built up over a lifetime. Not saying it is easy having a kid on the other side of the world - it isnt but if they are happy and contented in what they are doing and you have the wherewithall to catch up with them from time to time and could respond in an emergency and vice versa then get on with your life and have a ball I reckon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ena Posted August 2, 2011 Author Share Posted August 2, 2011 Don't get me wrong. I may still miss my son but i'm not the type of person to dwell in misery. I have visited him 4 times and have had a great time. I am also visiting him again next year with my daughter and grandaughter. So i hope you didn't get the wrong impression of me. thank you for your reply. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted August 2, 2011 Share Posted August 2, 2011 Don't get me wrong. I may still miss my son but i'm not the type of person to dwell in misery. I have visited him 4 times and have had a great time. I am also visiting him again next year with my daughter and grandaughter. So i hope you didn't get the wrong impression of me. thank you for your reply. Nope, didnt for one moment think you were dwelling in misery - it is harder for older people to move over though and just following your kids isnt the right thing to do if you compromise yourself, your interests, your friends, your supports and your life. So many people seem to want to bring their parents over and dont consider the sacrifice that their olds are making. If you are an outgoing, independent and skilled young old then you might have a chance to meld into the community here but Aus isnt a kind place for old people in lots of ways especially as the tendency seems to be to decrease their independence. It is a very difficult situation to be sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ena Posted August 2, 2011 Author Share Posted August 2, 2011 Nope, didnt for one moment think you were dwelling in misery - it is harder for older people to move over though and just following your kids isnt the right thing to do if you compromise yourself, your interests, your friends, your supports and your life. So many people seem to want to bring their parents over and dont consider the sacrifice that their olds are making. If you are an outgoing, independent and skilled young old then you might have a chance to meld into the community here but Aus isnt a kind place for old people in lots of ways especially as the tendency seems to be to decrease their independence. It is a very difficult situation to be sure. Thanks again for your reply, i value everyones opinion. we don't all think the same so it's good to read everyones. thanks again Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Cathwotherspoon Posted August 2, 2011 Share Posted August 2, 2011 My daughter and her family emigrated to Oz 3 years ago. She is my only child so it has been difficult. The idea when they went was that I would also go when they were settled, as I have no other family to speak of here. I am very much looking forward to starting the process sometime soon and it looks as though the timeframes are getting shorter for CPV's. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ena Posted August 2, 2011 Author Share Posted August 2, 2011 if you can maybe you could visit them, that should help you to see what kind of life they are having. It's a great comfort. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Cathwotherspoon Posted August 2, 2011 Share Posted August 2, 2011 I have visited a few times and really like the life they have - but its still pretty lonely without them and miss seeing my 2 grandsons. Anyway we now skype quite often which is good Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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