Alijane

Hi everyone. I am hoping to find some answers on behalf of my friend. They have lived here in OZ for 10 years and both her and her partner have PR. They are moving back to the UK in a few months due to family/personal reasons. She told me she wasn't going to get her citizenship but I strongly advised she should in case she changes her mind down the track, (i mean, it's so easy once being a PR for 10 years, why waste it right?). Anyway, she seems to think the process will take a few months and they therefore will have moved back to the UK by the time the interview and ceremony is due. So my question is; Can she apply now and attend a ceremony in the UK? Like at the Oz embassy or something?? It sounds like a stupid question, but they can't hang around in OZ and I feel she is really wasting an opportunity to get an aussie passport (which many people can only dream about!). thanks

Hi Pastey Pome. I wouldn't have a clue about accommodation! sorry! Did you mean hotels or rentals? Renting is pretty expensive in that area. Check out realestate.com.au I am from the Derby end of Leicestershire. Near the airport

Hi there, congratulations! Exciting times. I went public but paid for private ultrasounds (I'm not sure why!). The private offers you pretty much the same as public. I was/still am a huge advocate for going public (as I work in private and public healthcare). I think the difference between the two (despite the financial side) is the postnatal time I got, learning to be a new mum. The public hospital I was at is renowed and have a great neo-natal unit. The birth was great and I felt so supported and everything they did was up-to-date and in line with current evidence/research. I unfortunately had a bad post-natal experience on the ward. This was due to low staffing and no one had the time to teach me much and none of the midwives had a clue about me and a few complications I'd had and didn't even ask me my babies name until I was discharged, (however I am sure that they were excellent, I just unfortunately didn't witness it as I never saw them). I was so frustrated that I self discharged which was a mistake as I was a fish out of water! MY friend went private and had a better post natal experience than me - stayed in 5 days and got to see the lactation consultants and Drs everyday. But for our next child I would still go public as I feel I know all the new mum stuff now! Having said all that, a lot of friends went public and had brilliant post natal experiences. I really think my experience was due to the hospital being very very busy and under staffed (typical in healthcare!) If you go public you can have the baby at hospital or in a birth centre (for low risk pregnancies). I obviously didn't have an obstetrician going public, but I had an excellent GP who was maternity trained and affiliated with the baby hospital. So she was kind of an obstetrician but without all the cost! Bear in mind that if you go private and do have insurance, you will still be $5000 or so out of pocket. Hope that all makes sense! :-/

I really feel for you..but I can't help thinking that you are so exasperated at what's going on, that planning a move abroad IS running away. I do agree with maggiemay that selling up would perhaps do your brother a favour and kick start his wife and him into fending for themselves, but emigrating seems too drastic at the moment. It really is a huge expense and a lot of work just to show your dad that you aren't putting up with his behaviour anymore. I feel that you would be better off selling up and moving to a different part of the UK and then when the dust has settled, see if you still have the desire to start a new life on the other side of the world. It is a big deal emigrating. Make sure you are doing it for the right reasons.

Hi PasteyPom! I too am from Leicestershire but have lived in Melbourne for 7 years. It is just the best! Not your quintessential aussie town (a la home and away) but the best city for culture, great food, bars etc. Brunswick is uber cool! I wish I could live there! Lots of gigs in cool pubs, great quirky shops, lots of young people, parks, community stuff, very near to the city, great public transport. You will make friends in no time. I used to live around that area but have moved out to the 'burbs' due to work/babies/being near inlaws etc. Melbourne really is a special city that often gets forgotten about by Poms back home Good luck!

I really feel for you and I know exactly where you are coming from. I had a similar situation. I was here on a sponsorship, hated my job due to a bully, was encouraged to put an HR complaint in by my work place (a huge organisation) but this actually made the situation worse and I knew I had to leave. I decided to give up on my sponsorship as I decided that my health was way more important and Australia wasn't going anywhere - I can come back. However I had a huge stroke of luck, a couple of weeks after I resigned, my PR came through. I work in health so it was easy. I know you don't have this option. I don't have any legal advice for you or knowledge of other visas like other people on here, but I do know that health is more important and no job is worth it. You really do not want this to spiral out of control. It really does not sound like you have issues with yourself though - it seems purely associated with the job so I agree, the medication is pointless. Also, remember that resigning and giving up on the visa may seem like a failure or waste of 2 years, but in the grand scheme of your whole life, it's just a blip. I really hope you find employment that lets you shine and lets you have the happiness to make the right decisions for you and your other half. Best wishes xx

oh one more thing....I don't know about the rest of Aus, but the house prices here in Melbourne are ridiculously expensive so I guess that is also a factor to consider

Hi there! It sounds like two dilemma's masked as one; 1) Do I sell our business ( you have explained your hubby feels shackled and you are supporting your family) 2) Should we move to Oz (because you had a lovely holiday and need a change) I think it would be wise to separate the two issues first. Why not sell the business/distance yourself or whatever first and stay in the UK a little bit longer (even only 12 mnths). Then decide if you still want to move to Aus after that. That way if you move, you are moving for a change of lifestyle and for yourself/family, without taking the guilt with you. The guilt would only cloud your experience once you have moved if you do both things at once. Could you have a hiatus from the business for 6-12 months - keep it but get someone else to run it whilst you trial a period of time in Aus first? They say the first 6-12 months is like a holiday then reality hits! I also imagine that if you sell, move to Aus then decide you don't want to stay down under, you would move back to the UK and feel in a bit of a predicament. ?? Perhaps? So I guess I am saying try to separate the two issues first. Also, look at bit more closely at the being over 40 part. It may not be such a big barrier to emigrating being older than 40. You may also find that selling the business and staying in the UK is enough for you. You may no longer feel the need to emigrate. Like everyone has said, it depends on the reasons for moving. Just saying Good luck. I don't envy your position!

Have you been out on a holiday yet? An extended holiday?

I am so sorry that you have been through that. My first thought upon reading your post was that I am lucky to have the choice to see my parents in the first place

Hi. I have just obtained both passports for my daughter (waiting for uk one to be posted back to me). I am british (with perm res) and my hubby is australian. I believed that my daughter would be 'British OTHER than by descent' and not just 'British by descent'. So in other words, a 'proper' brit as I am british (just like I am british, my mum is british etc). I think you can go and live there with your son without needing a british passport first. If I was you, you need to double check the 'other than by descent bit' but I am pretty sure he would be. I think if he never were to go to uk and never got a passport, his kids would then be british by descent because of you. Geez it's confusing isn't it! I was seeking to not just get a passport and citizenship for my daughter but to also have her birth registered in the UK for future family trees I guess! I don't think they do this now as it's not necessary as Aus is part of the commonwealth

Thank you.

Thanks for your opinion and advice Parleycross. It's not really a case of forcing anyone to live anywhere in particular. I was just explaining my feelings of guilt towards my own parents and wondered if anyone had any advice on how to cope with this.

Thank you for that advice Keith and Linda. My parents also encourage me to live the life I want and to not restrict myself but I can't shake these guilty feelings. Its 100% my problem. Luckily, travelling to and fro is easy (even though very pricey!). I do visit quite often but I guess I miss the fact that mum can't just drop in for a spot of babysitting when we feel like it. As a female, there is no one like your own mother once you have had a baby of your own

It's so hard isn't it. I keep getting the in-laws saying "skype is a wonderful thing though isn't it' and it makes me mad! Its not the same. Yeah my parents can't afford lots of visits. Finally got them here when I was 5 months pregnant but I doubt we will get them over soon. We have just had to drag our baby over there when she was 10 weeks old!

Hi everyone. I am new to pomsinoz and this is my first post. :cute: I think I need to get somethings off my chest as I have been feeling very homesick lately. I moved to Melbourne 7 years ago as a 26 year old with no particular intentions, just wanted to try it out for a year or so. Well of course I had to meet someone and we now have a 5 month old baby. I have been homesick on and off since I moved here. I am very close to my family, especially my mum and my twin sister but have managed to just get on with life and have regular visits home. Now that I have had a baby, I am feeling so guilty about bringing up my daughter away from my own parents. They do not say anything discouraging and want what is best for me and the baby but it just breaks my heart having to show them the baby on skype all the time. Also, not letting my mum have the opportunity to babysit when I go back to work is breaking my heart and probably hers too. I think part of the problem is that now I feel I am 'stuck here'. I no longer have the freedom to just move home when I want to. I didn't consider that I would feel like this when we fell pregnant. Now I am starting to resent my in -laws and argue with my other half. My in-laws are great...they are just not my parents. I have a huge social network, a great other half, but can't help feeling lonely. My parents would not move here and my other half won't leave his parents. I also get the feeling that everyone thinks that as I made the choice to live in Australia, I should just 'put up with it'. I think I am also homesick for the UK in general - all the nostalgia attached to my own childhood and I want that for my daughter. It also doesn't help that we have moved out of the inner suburb area which I loved and one of the reasons I love Melbourne and have stayed so long. Just wondering if anyone else has experienced all this? Any advice? thanks everyone