Guest jo & aidy Posted April 22, 2007 Share Posted April 22, 2007 my 14 year old girl is quite adamant that she does not want to leave uk, she says she will never talk to me again! I know it is a diffiicult age and that she will miss her friends, but I feel it will be for her benifit in the long run. Please could anyone contact me who have experienced similar probs, as I am having problems sleeping at night because of the guilt! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest wackyjacky Posted April 22, 2007 Share Posted April 22, 2007 hi our son is 14 in august and we had a bit of trouble but we have now got visaas and booking flights etc he pretends to not be interested then when i am not looking he looks at things like visa in passport. he still says he dont want to go mainly cos of friends but we showed him videos of tv prog moving down under and the sort of house pool lifestyle etc and he now says that he knows he cant stay here so would like to go in schol hols so that he dont have to go back to schol and friends. i felt guilty too but just think of the kind of life you are gving her for the rest of her life and eventually you lose schol friends and make friends at work and collage , i cant beleive we are so lucky to be able to give our 3 kids such a great start to life good luck get your daughter on here to talk to others byee Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NTH SHARMAN Posted April 22, 2007 Share Posted April 22, 2007 Hi Jo. I'm not in quite the same position as you - my daughter is 9 and isn't totally against the idea of Australia. Having said that we still have attacks of guilt when she mentions how much she will miss her friends, family, etc and when the waterworks start. :cry: I think you're just going to have to grit your teeth through this one. Cruel to be kind springs to mind. I try and fit a little "Oz talk" into every day - even if its something as trivial as asking Hayleigh what colour she'd like her new bedroom to be or how deep she'd like our pool to be. That way it keeps the momentum going and lets her know that even though we're still quite a way off, the move is going to happen eventually. We bought a couple of books and just casually introduced Haylz to them. I appreciate how much harder it must be with a 14 year old. Hormones and everything come into play I would imagine. In the end, we are the adults and our kids have to do what they are told. Thats the bottom line really. I'm happy to offer what support I can. Just keep thinking that eventually she will thank you for it. Best of Luck, Tracey xxxxx:cute: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jonseywife Posted April 22, 2007 Share Posted April 22, 2007 Hi Jo & aidy and all those worrying Mums Kids eh........ they just dont realise the stressful decision we have all had to make, that were too are leaving friends/family/everything, spending a fortune doing it, and moving half way round the world, mainly for THEM and their future!!!!!! Keep telling yourselves, its for them and they will definately thank you in years to come! Well they better had.... :rolleyes: Ive got 4 kids, boys aged 16, 14, 10 and a daughter aged 12 and NONE of them really want to go (mainly coz of their friends) and we hav'nt been there either, so that doesnt help !! If you know what area your heading for, someone on here suggested contacting the schools and they can arrange an e-mail pal, so they can talk, ask questions about Oz and when you finally arrive, they feel they already now someone!!! I might do this nearer the time, its a great idea. Also, ive been trying to get the kids involved in looking at houses on the web., bribing them with a swimming pool and a snooker table and even a set of drums if we get a double garage, getting my son to research skate parks (there are hundreds in Oz), getting my daughter to look at clubs/beaches/cinemas/horse riding places near by and loads of other things to do around the area we are heading. It helps quite a bit........ they know they will be going soon (hopefully) and they are slowly coming round to the idea. So get her to research all her interests, hobbies in Oz, so she might feel a bit more involved with it all. Also, theres a younger ones sub-forum on here, so maybe she can register and get posting herself, im sure there are loads of teenagers feeling the same. Good luck & hope you get to sleep a bit better, if not have a large brandy before bedtime (for medicinal purposes only) and it'll all be good!!!!! :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest michele'n'michael Posted April 24, 2007 Share Posted April 24, 2007 my 14 year old girl is quite adamant that she does not want to leave uk, she says she will never talk to me again! I know it is a diffiicult age and that she will miss her friends, but I feel it will be for her benifit in the long run. Please could anyone contact me who have experienced similar probs, as I am having problems sleeping at night because of the guilt! Hi there my daughters 13 & is sort of the same.I've encouraged her to chat on this site to others & she seems alot more re-assured!! She's taken with how lovely & kind everone is. Even the adults on here have been answering her Q's. Pm her or even better get your daughter to. She goes by the name of Little Miss Sunshine & would love to chat to kids her own age xx Michele Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mandyh Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 hi, we moved over last year when mt daughter was 13, she really didn't want to leave her friends and i felt really bad for doing it. It took her a few months to settle in at school and she would come home upset, but now she loves it. Shes made a great group of friends, going to sleep overs, out shopping and going to the beach after school. I did feel guilty for moving at first but now i know i've done the right thing, it is hard and there will be tears, but my daughter said shes got better friends now than in the UK. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misslilly Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 It must be so difficult for you as all you want for your children is happiness, and I guess at the moment you're daughter is far from happy. But look at the bigger picture, you are, in the long run giving her a better life, she can't see it, as at 14 years old, you don't look any further than the weekend! I was 12 when my mum said we were going to Oz, I kicked up a right stink, crying and begging her to stay, but to be honest I probably would have been the same if she said we were moving 20 miles up the road! At that age your life is your friends, and you can't see beyond that! Anyway, I went, obviously and absolutley loved it! We had to come back a year later, and I went mad, kicking up a fuss again as I was dreading coming back! It took me longer to settle back into life here in UK even with my old friends, than it did settling into a brand new life in Oz! How I wish we had stayed! No doubt your daughter is dreading leaving her friends and life here, but it's only because she doesn't know any different, she doesn't know what else is out there! Honestly she'll be fine, I am sure she'll love it. Good luck. xxxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted May 8, 2007 Share Posted May 8, 2007 My daughter was upset when we first started talking about it, we laugh now because she said she was "leaving my whole life behind" - she was 11. It was terribly upsetting seeing her and her friends in tears saying goodbye but she has settled in so well here. I was the one who suggested getting a pen pal from school - my daughter doesn't actually mix with this girl much now and had started establishing her own network of friends. The UK is referred to as "hampshire Road" (where we lived) and whilst she still misses her best friend she isn't missing people to the same degree. Only a few weeks after arriving we were on the beach and she said "this is our life mum - how cool is this" Ali Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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