Talieandtribe Posted January 6, 2014 Share Posted January 6, 2014 Hi, maybe your "nest egg at the cost of a social life" has something to do with it? I'd try moving into the city and getting out there. Not being out at work must be a strain too... If that doesn't work out then try the UK. We have family in Edinburgh, Newcastle, Manchester and London we love all three cities. Edinburgh is beautiful but a tiny "scene" Newcastle is really friendly but again not the best social nightlife. We live in Manchester and have a lot of LGBT friends and family. There is a really good social scene for nightlife and support. Same with London. Sorry to focus on your sexuality. The not being "out" at work screamed to me. You're so young and seem to be in an enviable situation. Do it all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pommian Posted January 6, 2014 Share Posted January 6, 2014 Mate, go where your friends and family are. Everything else is just details. I am in a similar position to you. Me and the wife moved here 2 years ago. We have nice jobs, a good house, live near Sydney harbour - on the outside it looks like paradise, but I'm bored and homesick. Yes, my job in the UK was harder, the weather was shocking and the winters were massively depressing. But, I'd rather walk 10 minutes in the driving rain to meet my true friends for a beer than stroll down the beach for a drink by myself. I'd rather work a bit harder for less money and have a better life out of work. There is no doubt for me - once the Australian sightseeing is done, I'm going back to my hometown in England where I will embrace my friends and family and never let them go. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quinkla Posted January 6, 2014 Share Posted January 6, 2014 You don't "belong" anywhere. That's the trouble with having moved about - places change, people change, and you change yourself. You end up losing the comfort and security of somewhere you "belong". Small town Australia is very small town, but you'd have a great lifestyle in Melbourne or Sydney. Australia is much gayer than the UK - it is normal (at least in Melbourne and Sydney) to have work colleagues (including senior and successful ones) being openly gay and introducing partners just as straight colleagues do. You have gay couples appearing on TV gameshows and being together quite openly in both scene and regular places. Sydney Mardi Gras is promoted by the city and hotels, bars and restaurants are all happy to try to attract gay visitors. I'd think quite hard about whether to pass that up for the opportunity to live in Northern England. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goingbacktouk Posted January 10, 2014 Share Posted January 10, 2014 Pommian - you just summed up exactly why I'm going home in April - who cares if it's 'tougher' in England when you can moan about it with true friends and family in the pub!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnowPod Posted January 10, 2014 Share Posted January 10, 2014 I was in the same situation as yourself back when I was 28, Health Professional living in Brisbane loved the city, coast, my friends and family but just was bored! My UK passport (my family moved to Australia in '86) was burning a hole in my pocket, so I took the plunge and moved back to the UK, based myself in London & got locum work pretty much straight away..... Best decision I ever made! Where to live?!?!? My family are all from the North East & folks are so friendly up there but it was too cold for me initially. London is my second favourite city to Edinborough and just ahead of New York, it's definitely worth a living experience. That said, I agree with other posters & I would start close to family for support and friendly faces & then branch out & explore. After 9 years in the UK I finally convinced my Brit Husband to move back to Oz with me & 3 years on here we are...... If you're already considering a change, take the plunge give the UK a try, life is way too short! Good luck Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadianaussie Posted January 10, 2014 Author Share Posted January 10, 2014 Thanks again for all the information. An update - I quit my job! - yesterday. Feels scary and exciting at the same time. I'm staying on until March. Then plan to get up to Sydney for a month or 2 and back to the UK in May, just in time for summer!! Still unsure where I'll end up in the UK but will hopefully get a tentative plan in the next few months. Onwards and upwards... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chortlepuss Posted January 10, 2014 Share Posted January 10, 2014 I'd rather walk 10 minutes in the driving rain to meet my true friends for a beer than stroll down the beach for a drink by myself Was really touched by this statement. I desperately miss going to the pub & I don't really drink that much! But the friendship, warmth, banter and belonging - that's what I really miss. Not to mention chilling back on Sunday lunch with the papers before heading home for a nice roast dinner! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helz980 Posted January 10, 2014 Share Posted January 10, 2014 Thanks again for all the information. An update - I quit my job! - yesterday. Feels scary and exciting at the same time. I'm staying on until March. Then plan to get up to Sydney for a month or 2 and back to the UK in May, just in time for summer!! Still unsure where I'll end up in the UK but will hopefully get a tentative plan in the next few months. Onwards and upwards... brilliant news & very exciting!!!! Am jealous you are going home lol xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadianaussie Posted January 10, 2014 Author Share Posted January 10, 2014 brilliant news & very exciting!!!! Am jealous you are going home lol xx What are your plans Helz? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadianaussie Posted January 10, 2014 Author Share Posted January 10, 2014 You don't "belong" anywhere. That's the trouble with having moved about - places change, people change, and you change yourself. You end up losing the comfort and security of somewhere you "belong". Small town Australia is very small town, but you'd have a great lifestyle in Melbourne or Sydney. Australia is much gayer than the UK - it is normal (at least in Melbourne and Sydney) to have work colleagues (including senior and successful ones) being openly gay and introducing partners just as straight colleagues do. You have gay couples appearing on TV gameshows and being together quite openly in both scene and regular places. Sydney Mardi Gras is promoted by the city and hotels, bars and restaurants are all happy to try to attract gay visitors. I'd think quite hard about whether to pass that up for the opportunity to live in Northern England. Thats an interesting perspective. You're right, I don't really have a "home." It's good and bad, and I do feel like I want to start establishing something more lasting, permanent in the next few years. As for giving it all up, I'm only planning to spend about 6 months in the UK. Then I can make an unbiased decision on where I want that permanent place to be. I don't have much baggage so don't have to worry about shipping, etc so can (relatively) easily change countries. Good for now I guess, but not for the long term!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bora Posted January 10, 2014 Share Posted January 10, 2014 Well done Canadian Aussie, good for you. Feels great don't it? I quit my job a couple of months back and hung on for dear life, bored stiff, in a place that sucked the life out of me. I finished up yesterday and heading home I felt 9 foot tall - the sense of relief and joy was unbelievable like I'd been finally found on a deserted island when I had run out of hope. A personal feat of endurance. Now here is the best bit, hehe.. I am now just 5 DAYS away from getting on that plane and returning to England. I am simply beside myself with excitement. I can hardly contain it, although the impending heatwave next week is dampening my enthusiasm somewhat as I have the packing of my home to oversee and the forecasted 39c I guess will not be pleasant on move day! Scary yes as I return to re-build my life, thrilling, you bloody bet !! I couldn't give a toss how cold wet murky it is going to be, inside I'm going to be like a firework exploding. And I will banish this experience from my mind for ever as I return to be happy again. The thought of it is making my heart thump..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
canadianaussie Posted January 10, 2014 Author Share Posted January 10, 2014 Congratulations Bora! Definitely sounds like the right decision for you. I'm in 2 minds about the whole thing. I actually really enjoy my role, job, location. I'm just bored socially and looking for a change. Time will tell if its the right move or not! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 11, 2014 Share Posted January 11, 2014 Just want to wish you look really, as I don't have much to add to what has been said. I think the UK beckons - if your partner was 'the one' then I'd probably say otherwise but give it a try - 10 is definitely old enough to have an attachment to the UK and British parents (I presume) would mean culturally it possibly won't be as strange to you as Australia. I was going to suggest Edinburgh because the feeling i got is the big city living may not be for you and not only is Edinburgh beautiful you are moments away from countryside. I don't know what you do for work but Edinburgh would have most opportunities and there is something of a gay scene, being 'out' there would be zero problem. However another poster thinks otherwise If you're going to make disparaging comments about my home town at least learn to spell Middlesbrough Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Helz980 Posted January 11, 2014 Share Posted January 11, 2014 What are your plans Helz? Am remaining her for 6 months then going to reassess how am feeling about being here. Meanwhile am trying to 'make a go of it' xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Bora Posted January 11, 2014 Share Posted January 11, 2014 Thanks CanadianAussie. I Kind of feel for you as it complicates your decision making if everything is going well but for how you feel about your social life, which must be difficult for you. For me it was easy once the homesickness subsided. The decision was an easy one once I took time to evaluate and when your not happy with where you are, your work, and how the children are progressing, I didn't actually have to decide at all. The decision was made for me .....But I would suggest ignoring your head as it tends to steer you, don't be afraid to go against the logic but do what you believe in and when your heart over rules your head, the decision is effectively made for you. Congratulations Bora! Definitely sounds like the right decision for you. I'm in 2 minds about the whole thing. I actually really enjoy my role, job, location. I'm just bored socially and looking for a change. Time will tell if its the right move or not! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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