We built nearly 3 years ago through a builder and it seemed stressful at the time but looking back, it wasn't as bad as it seems. You do need to do your research so you get exactly what you want that is within your budget and stick to it. Think about what has to be done as part of the build and maybe leave some things for after the build. It was cheaper for us to get the aircon done afterwards buying the units in the sales and getting an installer to do it which only took a day. The builder wanted a fortune to render the outside but we got father in laws mate (who so happened to be a renderer for the builder anyway) to do it for a quarter the price in cash and a few bottles of bundy so we could afford o get the whole house rendered instead of just the front.
The builder offers you a range of things like taps, tiles, colour of the grout, flooring, door handles, toilets which can be overwhelming and it can take over your life. We went for a higher spec on some things and lower spec on others and did some things in our own. Luckily the OH loves trawling the Internet and design mags and we got amazing bargains on almost everything so we could get higher spec for a price lower than the builder offered. Nearly 3 years on we have found the right outdoor tiles so the house will finally be finished soon. We did our own gardens and a neighbour said we have the best gardens in the whole estate which is a great compliment and she wants to copy some of the designs. Apart from the gardens we have done little work on the house itself.
as with any build or DIY project we have made some mistakes (nothing major) but our house is exactly what we wanted and we would build again. Friends and neighbours say visiting is like going on holiday so the effort has been worth it