Getting the jitters

[AoifesMum]

:cool:Hello all,

My partner has a job offer in Canberra and has submitted all the relevant paperwork for the visa. All being well we should be over in Australia in the next 2-3 months. Part of me is very excited and another is dreading it. For those of you who have made the move, is this normal? I am really looking forward to meeting new people and exploring the country (I have loads of books on Australia and have been surfing the web!), and I won't have to work so can spend time with our two young children (everything is such a rush over in the UK as I have to work, albeit part time). But I am dreading leaving family and friends and feel depressed just thinking of it. I really don't know whether we are doing the right thing, but the way the job market is over here we have little choice. Are these feelings normal? I also know that, if we did not take the plunge, we would regret it and I am getting bored with my job etc over here. It's just soooo far away and Christmas has really added to the feeling that we would be leaving so many people behind. Hope you all have a good new year!

x

[Dawny]

Aww i think you will find 100% of all the peeps on pio experienced the jitters and doubts at one stage or another, so fear not, you are not alone! We had major jitters leading up to the move, the strange thing they had completely gone by the day of our flight lol,

Wishing you all the very best for a happy healthy new year xx

[Quoll]

I was one of the weird ones who didnt have any jitters at all before I came here but, then, I didnt have it pegged as a "forever" experience and fully expected to move on to something else like we had always done before. Had I known it was going to be "forever" I might have had a few more jitters. If you can look at it as just another step and expect there will be a step after it and another after that then it is easier to come to terms with - I think once you put the finality into it then it becomes far more difficult. Dont burn any bridges and be very clear with each other what you want in the short, medium and longer term (that's where I went wrong, we both made erroneous assumptions about the long long term LOL) then you should be fine.

 

Edited to say, I would expect that you would have to work in Canberra too - this is very much the town of the dual income as most families need to have two incomes coming in to service the mortgage. There are fewer young mums around than you would think - as my daughter in law is discovering to her dismay at the moment.

[AoifesMum]

Hi both,

Thanks for the replies. Your advice was great Quoll - not to look at it as forever. We are looking at 3-4 years initially and do intend to return, but who knows!? I think we have done our sums and the major pull for us was the fact that I don't have to work, but we should still have the same standard of living as we do here with me working (if that makes sense?). My partner is a civil engineer and the wage, calculating pounds to dollars, is pretty much double over in Canberra to what he earns here, even though its not really a promotion. It more than covers my wage here, even though I appreciate that some things (health care etc) are more expensive. Apparently Oz is very short of senior engineers/managers in the field? I have no issue with working but do want to settle in and, most importantly, get the children settled before I find work. Maybe I could meet up with your daughter in law sometime Quoll! I have a 5 year old daughter and 5 month old son. Thanks again both - feeling more positive now with the new year and all!

x

[Guest guest36187]

It is SO normal! I was ok until I had the visa in our hand! Then I cried and thought `hell I really have to go now!`

 

Its a normal feeling. x

[Guest Caroline Gibson]

This has been so good for me as my husband has a chance of a job in Perth and although it is very early days we have both had a range of feelings towards being really excited at the prospect of a nicer life (as we both work full-time and it is becoming a little bit of a rat race) and with having x2 girls at 10 and 7 I feel I don't have as much time to spend with them to waking up first thing in the morning and having the jitters just thinking about leaving everyone.

[Quoll]

Hi both,

Thanks for the replies. Your advice was great Quoll - not to look at it as forever. We are looking at 3-4 years initially and do intend to return, but who knows!? I think we have done our sums and the major pull for us was the fact that I don't have to work, but we should still have the same standard of living as we do here with me working (if that makes sense?). My partner is a civil engineer and the wage, calculating pounds to dollars, is pretty much double over in Canberra to what he earns here, even though its not really a promotion. It more than covers my wage here, even though I appreciate that some things (health care etc) are more expensive. Apparently Oz is very short of senior engineers/managers in the field? I have no issue with working but do want to settle in and, most importantly, get the children settled before I find work. Maybe I could meet up with your daughter in law sometime Quoll! I have a 5 year old daughter and 5 month old son. Thanks again both - feeling more positive now with the new year and all!

x

 

I am sure my d-i-l would love to catch up for a play date, she has been looking for new "mum type" friends since she got back here in September. Let me know when you get here and I will put you in touch!

 

Dont be misled by the exchange rate - the average Canberra wage would be around $80k and most families have well over the $100k coming in from two incomes and you can reckon on paying over $2- 2.5k per month for a bog standard rental. I'm not saying you will need to work (you probably wont if your family income is over $120k) but dont be surprised at how expensive things are here.

[AoifesMum]

I am sure my d-i-l would love to catch up for a play date, she has been looking for new "mum type" friends since she got back here in September. Let me know when you get here and I will put you in touch!

 

Dont be misled by the exchange rate - the average Canberra wage would be around $80k and most families have well over the $100k coming in from two incomes and you can reckon on paying over $2- 2.5k per month for a bog standard rental. I'm not saying you will need to work (you probably wont if your family income is over $120k) but dont be surprised at how expensive things are here.

 

Thanks Quoll, I will do that! I think we have worked things out correctly wage-wise but I have no issues with working. I just wouldn't want to start anything for a little while as it will be such an upheaval for my 5 year old I think its important I'm around for at least the first 9-12 months or so. If I do need to work part time, so be it. In the UK there really is no option whereas we will have more flexibility in Oz to reduce my hours or stay at home for a little while.

[Guest The Pom Queen]

This has been so good for me as my husband has a chance of a job in Perth and although it is very early days we have both had a range of feelings towards being really excited at the prospect of a nicer life (as we both work full-time and it is becoming a little bit of a rat race) and with having x2 girls at 10 and 7 I feel I don't have as much time to spend with them to waking up first thing in the morning and having the jitters just thinking about leaving everyone.

 

Hi Caroline welcome to PIO. The whole moving process is like a roller-coaster of emotions, one minute you feel on top of the world, next you feel like you have hit rock bottom, then you are excited again and this goes on and on until the time you arrive.

I can remember when we finally exchanged on our house I told my OH it was the worst thing ever and I wanted to change my mind. After being out here 7 years we have never once gone back to the UK, so yes we love it and are settled.