kellyjamie Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 hi guys we have been advised that i should consider speaking to my ex sooner rather than later about taking my son to oz. im fully aware of all what is involved i just wondered those who have done it, how do you start the conversation? cheers an anxious kelly x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mandypete Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 hi guys we have been advised that i should consider speaking to my ex sooner rather than later about taking my son to oz. im fully aware of all what is involved i just wondered those who have done it, how do you start the conversation?cheers an anxious kelly x Hey Kelly, We have just done this... its so nerve racking!... My Hubby and I are going on a 457 visa so it has been a relitively quick process, we have been looking into Oz for about 18 months and finally decided to go for it when I lost both of my jobs at Christmas, it was a case of 'Whats keeping us here?'... :err: Well we started contacting companies, (once i decide to do something, i really dont hang around! lol!) and within a few weeks we had 2 interviews arranged for him, he was offered a job verbally at the end of Jan. My Son just turned 6 last week, and he still sees his Dad although a lot less than he used to. His Dad and I split when he was 1, and I have been with my Hubby since he was 2, my son always says hes lucky because he has got 2 Daddys!... Anyway, I got myself all geared up for the big argument/slanging match/ worst case scenario, and honestly you could have knocked me over with a feather... I asked if we could meet up, he asked what about, I said we are considering moving again (we already live 40 odd miles away from him) he said where to, and I said Australia! - :laugh: Queue silence! His actual response was "I cant say I am happy, and I know its really going to hurt, but if you think that this is going to be a better life for him, then Im not going to stand in the way of your dreams!" Bloody Amazing! We have since met up with him and his partner to discuss it all face to face, and it went really well... There is usually a strained politeness between my ex and my Hubby, but this time my sons Dad actually said to my hubby, "Why do you want to do this?" Hubby said "for a better life for me Mandy and Jack" Ex said "No, its for a better life for you, your wife and YOUR son, I know Im his Father but lets face it YOUR his Dad (Had to physically close Hubbys dropped Jaw!)" Sorry, bit of a long post, but what Im trying is, its hard to do, but your ex might just surprise you... How old is your son? Were you married to your ex?...I have lots of info if you need any advise x Good Luck x Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Noodle Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 I agree with Mandypete. Best thing to do is just go for it. Show him you have really thought this through and push all the positives you child(children) will have. Explain that you must at least try and that you need his support to keep any kind relationship going for all. We did this early on, we thought of leaving it until later but then thought it could really mess things up if he decided to fight us. If he does decide to fight you on the issue, there are plenty of people on the PIO who have been in this position and they will be able to share their experiences and try and help. Best wishes and good luck, nothing good comes too easy! xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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