Did anyone else feel like I do?

[Sapphire]

Its odd, how virtually no-one ever dresses smart to go out. You see the odd person dressed up, but the majority dont bother.

The only time they seem to bother here is for cup day.

[diabloinperth]

Its odd, how virtually no-one ever dresses smart to go out. You see the odd person dressed up, but the majority dont bother.

The only time they seem to bother here is for cup day.

 

Yeah why is that? Just doesn't make sense to me. Can't wait to get home so I can go out with the girls and get glammed up!!! 4 weeks and counting )

[Sapphire]

Yeah why is that? Just doesn't make sense to me. Can't wait to get home so I can go out with the girls and get glammed up!!! 4 weeks and counting )

 

Im so jealous:)

Dont know why they dont dress up, or even want to look semi-decent even just to go to the shops.

I just honestly think they are lazy, and throw on any old thing.

My Hubby always says even if you put them in Prada, they would still look like bags of s...t

I think he may be right

[diabloinperth]

Im so jealous:)

Dont know why they dont dress up, or even want to look semi-decent even just to go to the shops.

I just honestly think they are lazy, and throw on any old thing.

My Hubby always says even if you put them in Prada, they would still look like bags of s...t

I think he may be right

 

Haha, I think you might be right which is a shame because there are some truly stunning people around!! I actually commented to my sister this morning that it seems like nobody brushes their hair anymore??

[lamada]

I have also found this at work here. I like to wear a nice suit with trousers (not pants!) or a skirt, but felt so overdressed compared to the others who wear cut off trousers and tops so stopped bothering!!

[Kerry Pollard]

I havent felt like myself for the whole time, I have been here.Ive felt like it since the day we arrived 5 1/2 years ago.

I cant put my finger on it, but I dont feel well, if that makes sense.

Im not ill, but I feel yukky all the time,,,just cant be bothered and lethargic.

Is it just cos Im stuck somewhere I dont want to be.

Does that feeling lift as soon as you get home,,,,I hope so, cos Im not me anymore, and Ive forgotton how it feels to be me.:frown:

 

Is it just me, or are there others out there who have felt this way, or if you are still here, do you feel like this too???

 

 

 

Its so good to know that other people feel the way u do, I am not myself here, I don't feel like myself, I am comfort eating, I don't want to go out. I too feel tired all the time, I think that might have something to do with the fact of me staying up late to watch the programmes I like.

But I feel like I'm in a bubble and sometimes I could stay in bed all day and not do anything, I do think it has something to do with the fact I don't want to be here.

I am on count down, I don't care I'll be homeless and have only a suitcase to my name, I want to be me again.

i do think sometimes am I doing the right thing in going home but when I think of home that question is answered.

I am doing what is right for me and my son and home is where the heart is.

i can't wait to feel normal again. Xxxx

[graciemay]

Its so good to know that other people feel the way u do, I am not myself here, I don't feel like myself, I am comfort eating, I don't want to go out. I too feel tired all the time, I think that might have something to do with the fact of me staying up late to watch the programmes I like.

But I feel like I'm in a bubble and sometimes I could stay in bed all day and not do anything, I do think it has something to do with the fact I don't want to be here.

I am on count down, I don't care I'll be homeless and have only a suitcase to my name, I want to be me again.

i do think sometimes am I doing the right thing in going home but when I think of home that question is answered.

I am doing what is right for me and my son and home is where the heart is.

i can't wait to feel normal again. Xxxx

 

Hi Kerry

 

You are certainlu not alone there are many of us out there. Where is home and when do you plan to return?

[Thistle13]

I finally had 'the conversation' with my son and it went so much better than I anticipated. I told him I wasn't happy here and I wanted to go back to Scotland. He told me that he'd known that for a long time and that while he had grown up without an extended family he had gotten used to that and his friends were his family, but he appreciated that I had never been able to do that. He toldme he wanted me to go back as my happiness was more important to him than anything else. I can't believe how stressed I must've been as its like a weight has been lifted. I actually had someone ask me today why I was so friggin happy. Was it that noticeable? Apparently so

[Kerry Pollard]

Hi Kerry

 

You are certainlu not alone there are many of us out there. Where is home and when do you plan to return?

 

My home is Stockport about 10 mins on a train from Manchester, I return on the 5th April, 7 weeks on Friday.

I can't wait.

Are u going home any time soon or are u already their? Xx

[graciemay]

My home is Stockport about 10 mins on a train from Manchester, I return on the 5th April, 7 weeks on Friday.

I can't wait.

Are u going home any time soon or are u already their? Xx[/quote

 

I left Leyland near preston with my husband and two children to come here 9.5 yrs ago , i will be returning on my own to mums who's in Bamber Bridge near Preston. I am from Manchester originally have loads of family in and around Manchester. I know Stockport nanna lived in Didsbury. I am happy for you xx

[Kerry Pollard]

My home is Stockport about 10 mins on a train from Manchester, I return on the 5th April, 7 weeks on Friday.

I can't wait.

Are u going home any time soon or are u already their? Xx[/quote

 

I left Leyland near preston with my husband and two children to come here 9.5 yrs ago , i will be returning on my own to mums who's in Bamber Bridge near Preston. I am from Manchester originally have loads of family in and around Manchester. I know Stockport nanna lived in Didsbury. I am happy for you xx

 

 

 

Oh wow, I lived in Preston about 8 yrs ago, I lived on Waterloo road in Ashton-on-ribble.

i loved it.

Awwww, wow 9.5yrs, god that's a long time.

I'm happy for you too, theirs seems to be a lot of people returning this year.

Good luck. Xxx

[CrimsonPetal]

I'm late to this thread but I do get where you're coming from. Since being back in the UK I am a changed person. Only way I can describe it is I am 'me' again. =]

[fizzybangs]

I'm desperately hoping I find 'me' again when we get back to UK. After 31 years here and a 2nd marriage (to another Pom), I won't be the same me as the one who left! Also I am leaving my now adult children here. They think we are doing the right thing for us which is good. However, I have no idea who 'me' is any more but I'm going to try and find out! All I know is is that it is home and as soon as we arrive back there it is a feeling inside that is very, very warm. I have a huge family over there - four generations of them and they are all so loving and welcoming. Last time we were back for over 3 months I felt almost overwhelmed by their love as I have been so used to living without it isolated here in Oz like a ghost who looks on.

[Thistle13]

I'm desperately hoping I find 'me' again when we get back to UK. After 31 years here and a 2nd marriage (to another Pom), I won't be the same me as the one who left! Also I am leaving my now adult children here. They think we are doing the right thing for us which is good. However, I have no idea who 'me' is any more but I'm going to try and find out! All I know is is that it is home and as soon as we arrive back there it is a feeling inside that is very, very warm. I have a huge family over there - four generations of them and they are all so loving and welcoming. Last time we were back for over 3 months I felt almost overwhelmed by their love as I have been so used to living without it isolated here in Oz like a ghost who looks on.

 

 

You will find yourself again, it may be a different one, but then if you had never came to Oz, you wouldnt have been the same anyway, life and experiences change us, just sit back and enjoy as you watch your extended family, knowing that you (like me) have something they dont have, which is a deeper appreciation of our roots and what 'home' actually means. Returning is a choice. All the very best of wishes.

[Louise81]

Wow all these comments are like you are describing and living exactly what I am. I'm in tears reading and writing this. Been here 20months, SAHM in sydney, have made such an effort to get out and about, meet people, invite mums and kids round for playdates, bbqs etc (none repayed the favour) etc. made a really good friend who goes back to her native Ireland in 3 weeks. I feel trapped here.The hubby is doing well at work, but he feels the same as me and we've talked about it non stop since we got here. We moved because he was struggling to find work in uk. We to back for a holiday in June for 2 wks. I have been on and off antidepressants and the weight issue is same for me too. I want to feel confident again, this place has drained me of everything I have, and is turning me into a bitter, cant be arsed with anyone person (this is not me )Makes me feel not so alone knowing that you too have felt this way. Thanks for listening to my ramblings

[Guest]

Wow all these comments are like you are describing and living exactly what I am. I'm in tears reading and writing this. Been here 20months, SAHM in sydney, have made such an effort to get out and about, meet people, invite mums and kids round for playdates, bbqs etc (none repayed the favour) etc. made a really good friend who goes back to her native Ireland in 3 weeks. I feel trapped here.The hubby is doing well at work, but he feels the same as me and we've talked about it non stop since we got here. We moved because he was struggling to find work in uk. We to back for a holiday in June for 2 wks. I have been on and off antidepressants and the weight issue is same for me too. I want to feel confident again, this place has drained me of everything I have, and is turning me into a bitter, cant be arsed with anyone person (this is not me )Makes me feel not so alone knowing that you too have felt this way. Thanks for listening to my ramblings

 

Are you from Ireland too? I believe things are pretty bad there. What does your OH do? Are there regions in the UK where work could be easier to find? We are moving back to Scotland and from the number of job adverts and from talking to people I know in my industry work is probably easier to find than it is in Perth.

 

The fact you are talking non-stop and both feel the same is such a blessing and you can get through this together. It doesn't have to be forever - don't even think about forever, he is simply 'working away from home' until things are more favourable for you at home, and it is much better that you are together then him working off-shore or in the middle east. There are a lot of people doing it tough in the UK and Ireland at the moment and you are fortunate to be able to escape that for a while (or at least try to think about it that way)

 

The visit back will be a watershed, either you will realise you are fortunate to be in a position where your OH has work and is doing well or you will know for sure it is simply not worth it. We went back in July and that was the catalyst for our decision to return home. Since making that decision I am a different person and in fact enjoying life here a little bit more - I am no longer yearning for the kind of close friendships I had in the UK as I know I can have them again soon. I feel more free to enjoy what is different in Australia that is a good difference and accept the downside is only temporary.

 

I had counselling with an ACT therapist which I found very helpful, it was actually for chronic pain but it helped me in other ways too - if you google 'the happiness trap' you can find some useful information on-line. Also have a look at moodgym. If you're stuck in this situation for now it is helpful to find ways to cope - it doesn't stop you planning an escape. You may feel trapped but you are not, you do have choices - even the doomsayers are talking about the UK economy not recovering to it's peak in 2007 for another two years which isn't that long in the grand scheme of things. And it is amazing how different you will feel if you have an exit plan.

 

In the mean time don't do anything that makes it harder to leave - don't buy a property (if you haven't already, get ready to sell it if you have), I don't know how old your child(ren) is/are but don't 'Australian-ise' them (not that we could with our son and we really tried!). Think in terms of 'when' we go back not 'if' and work towards making it happen.

[Louise81]

Thanks for your kind words jules2409, they have really helped. We're from England and after looking at job sites for hubby there is not much, actually nothing that would mean we could return to a normal life where he isn't working away from home for the week. We have both said we will definitely not buy a house, and have left all things open to go back to our life in uk (home, bank accounts etc) as you say I think the trip back will set everything in perspective and give us the strength we need to either stick with aus for a couple of years (although that seems tooooo long to cope with right now) I think I'm just annoyed with myself that I can't just 'get on with it' here, lack of family and good friends does make you feel so alone. I do have my days where I think &@&$ it I don't need anyone, but they are very short lived and emotionally draining. We have said sometimes we are glad we came, them other times why did we do this to ourselves !! Maybe it's our fault for not being happy with our lot back home, at least now I know when we go back I won't take opportunities for granted. Although being here has made me question myself on my general personality etc as I have found it easy to make fly by friends but only one good friend. Am I too picky? Am I boring? Am I not nice? Do i put in enough effort- Seriously I feel like a teenager again!! I thought that angst had past me by a LONG time ago!!lol

[simmo]

It's very cliquey in Australia and the constant battle to feel socially accepted can leave you asking yourself "Am I too picky? Am I boring? Am I not nice? Do i put in enough effort". I found this too, I spent months trying to get invited to after work drinks until in the end I thought fk it and just tagged along and sat down with them whether they liked it or not.. In the end they accepted my in their "circle of trust" but once in I felt uneasy being part of this pathetic clique and I realised that I didn't actually like them very much.

The same with pubs. I like pubs me.. But getting social in a pub as a stranger was nigh on impossible for me. Yet here in the UK and most other countries i've visited I can be involved in a group after minutes of walking into a bar/pub alone as a complete stranger.

People will advise you that you are not trying hard enough, friend take years to develop bla bla bla , thats bullsh!t, aussies (in general) are just clicquy and socially retarded compared to Brits and Euros.

 

IMO

[Louise81]

Agree! Miss going out to pubs etc with hubby and having a Craic with almost anyone! Different here, I like BBQ and family meeting etc but I do miss going out for a pub crawl meeting the weird and wonderful on our way! Will have to get 2yr quota in 2wk!!!

[Chortlepuss]

Although being here has made me question myself on my general personality etc as I have found it easy to make fly by friends but only one good friend. Am I too picky? Am I boring? Am I not nice? Do i put in enough effort- Seriously I feel like a teenager again!!

 

My daughter describes Ozzies as having a huge 'personal bubble' I've met some lovely people here, but unfortunately with one or two exceptions, they tend to be British or Asian. I think Australians would rather stick with the circle that they grew up with, and it's impossible to break in to get close..... Cultural differences are pretty tough to overcome, and some Australians find my self deprecating, piss taking humour too much (what can be very funny to a Brit is often percieved as 'negative' to an Oz) . I'm middle aged with older teenagers, and I think Aussie women of my demographic don't tend to want to go out drinking etc. they'll meet for lunch or coffee but that's about it ..Don't know any who 'go away for the weekend' and leave their hubbies and kids - maybe I'm a bad wife and mother!! .. I get pretty lonely here, and hanker for my old 'crowd' of female friends in the UK, but I often come on this site and find people going through exactly the same thing!

[Louise81]

My daughter describes Ozzies as having a huge 'personal bubble' I've met some lovely people here, but unfortunately with one or two exceptions, they tend to be British or Asian. I think Australians would rather stick with the circle that they grew up with, and it's impossible to break in to get close..... Cultural differences are pretty tough to overcome, and some Australians find my self deprecating, piss taking humour too much (what can be very funny to a Brit is often percieved as 'negative' to an Oz) . I'm middle aged with older teenagers, and I think Aussie women of my demographic don't tend to want to go out drinking etc. they'll meet for lunch or coffee but that's about it ..Don't know any who 'go away for the weekend' and leave their hubbies and kids - maybe I'm a bad wife and mother!! .. I get pretty lonely here, and hanker for my old 'crowd' of female friends in the UK, but I often come on this site and find people going through exactly the same thing!

 

 

Lol!!! Too true!! I made a comment about the rain and not to blame us pommies for it, for a response "you can't be whinging it was beautiful last week" Said in a very serious way....................I exhaled loudly and carried on- jeysus!!!! Where's the banter?? I miss the sarcastic piss taking banter!!!!!!