ItchyFeet76

Are Trunkis classed as hand luggage as they're quite small...?

They have Freecycle in Australia?? Fantastic. Didn't know that. Is there often a lot of decent stuff on there (e.g. furniture / white goods)?

To be honest, I'd leave any kitchen bits in Oz as they're cheap to replace over here and you'll need them as soon as you get here (unless you plan to live on takeouts!). Not sure how long you've been away but check out Asda for homewares (if you're on a low budget) - our friend has just kitted out his new house extremely cheaply (and it's not all tat that breaks in a week, either). Good luck with your move back to the UK - bring us some sunshine over, please ;-) I-F

Personally I'd avoid living in London if it's your first time in the UK. Much better to live somewhere more affordable that's maybe 1-2 hours' away if you wish to visit the City. Unless, of course, you plan on working there... We live in Market Harborough and it is a thriving market town one hour on the train from London St Pancras. It has a fair amount of blue-collar work going (from what I've seen in the local paper) but is predominantly middle-class and has a lovely selection of quaint boutiques, independent coffee shops, teamed with some major multiples for your 'big' shopping (Waitrose / Tesco / Sainsbury's). It has a leisure centre, football / rugby / squash club, countryside on the doorstep (lots of walks, parks, canal nearby), affordable housing (coming from the south, anyway!) and is less than 30 minutes' drive away from Leicester and Northampton (and 10 minutes' from the A14). Great train links, too (as afore-mentioned). Annual "Arts Fresco" event and, oh, home to The Great British Bake Off 2013's winner - Frances Quinn!! (whose parents own Quinn's Bookshop in the town). Have I convinced you yet...? ;-)

Our annual gas / electric is around £1800. We live in a four-bed detached with conservatory (to give you an idea of the size of space we have to heat). I'm a full-time mum so am at home all day, and my husband often works from home, too. That said, we're in a brand new house which is supposedly better insulated (it certainly feels warmer on a cold day - with no heating on - than my parents' or inlaws' houses do) and, despite having lots of gadgets (Xbox, iCube, TV, laptops, radio, etc.) I'm very strict about the kids turning them off when they're not being used, and only putting lights on when it gets dim (I chastise my husband for leaving the under-cabinet lights on in the morning!). We have a washer-dryer (used most days), tumble-dryer (in garage - used occasionally for bulky items as washer-dryer only takes small loads), microwave (used several times a day), dishwasher (used once a day at 50p a time) and electric oven / grill (used several times a week but not normally every day). I laugh when the press appear shocked at the average annual bill hitting £1500... I should be so lucky ;-)

Thanks Jac2011 for your thoughtful comments :-) I'm torn between wanting to fulfil our long-standing desire to experience living abroad, and our children's security and future. I agree that the benefits of a 'sabbatical' for children are that they would hopefully gain more independence, greater cultural understanding, etc. and that it would broaden their minds and remind them that there is life outside of the UK. It may not necessarily be better (just as well if we're only doing it temporarily!) but so long as it's no worse and we're no worse off financially, then I think we can handle it. Whenever I think of the hassle and expense involved in selling all our stuff, renting our lovely new house out to total strangers (and increasing our mortgage term and paying the bank extra to do so!), completing self-assessments (for rental), other paperwork / bureaucracy, etc. it just fills me with dread and I want to curl up and never leave my house! We've moved house 4 times in 6 years so I guess that's my body / mind's way of saying "enough!". Lol. Nothing needs to be done yet though, so I guess we'll sit on it until next year and if we still want to do it then we'll start job-hunting and reassess the situation if / when we find anyone willing to sponsor my husband :-) I-F :-)

Me neither! I think you're right - he would be just 4 months behind, not 1 yr 4 mths. It seemed like they would be further behind because my youngest would start school (UK) before we go, but then have to wait another year (Aus) to start, so I had it in my head that they'd always be 1 yr behind! Thanks for clearing that up :-)

No, because he into the last age bracket so loses points for age, and you don't get extra points for having a certain occupation, unfortunately. I agree with the cautionary advice but I don't see what practical measures we can put in place to be 'careful', short of finding a lump sum of cash under the sofa incase we run into money troubles, or not getting on the plane in the first place. I hope you manage to find employment as a nurse - I've also heard it's in demand so I'm sure you'll be fine :-)

Hmmm the concerns you guys both raised are certainly weighing on my mind considerably. Not so much the job bit, as my husband is lucky enough to be in a sector of work which is very much in demand and not likely to be affected by the new 457 visa rules as they just cannot find qualified, experienced locals to do it (he's a Penetration Tester, aka IT Security Consultant, aka Computer Hacker). But definitely the kids' education and the potential charges for school fees bits... My mind is all over the place at the mo. Part of me wants them to bring in the visa fees rule in Vic so the decision is taken out of my mind, but the other part still desperately wants to give it a shot as we've been talking about it for a decade now and we just feel we'll always regret it if we don't try it. Or get it out of our systems, at least... But not to the detriment of my children's future. :frown:

We are, in fact, only planning a temporary move. We don't have enough points for PR so the 457 route is our only way, which actually suits me as I'm not ready to leave my UK life behind on a permanent basis. Yet. If we love it then we'll see if there's a way of using our time in Oz to get enough points to get PR (on a 186) and, if we hate it, we return to the UK with no shame as it was "only temporary" anyway ;-) My concern - and something which would potentially put me off doing it if I thought it would damage my children's education / future - is the fact that, when we return to the UK, our children will essentially be skipping an academic year as Aus starts later. I.e. say we return in Jan 2019, my son will be leaving Aus year 5 (not yet starting Yr 6) and going straight into the second term of UK year 7 (which would have begun in Sep 2018). And so on for our other kids... If there is anyone out there who has done the move on a temporary basis, I would be very interested to hear their views on how / if it affected their children's education... Thanks, I-F PS - Thanks also for the chart - very helpful! (we would be going to Melbourne anyway)

Wow, that does sound reasonable. Are meals and drinks included or is it self-catering? If the latter, I'm guessing another £500...? (inc. coffees, beers, vin chaud, etc. on the slopes). We're a family of 5 and I'd love our kids to learn to board / ski but I always thought it would be too pricey.

Ah ok. I don't know much about regional visas, evidently! It still shouldn't mean that she gets thrown out of the country if she loses her job over addressing this issue, and it should still be grounds for constructive dismissal if they did sack her because of this. Companies can't get away with behaving like this, not without legal ramifications. Perhaps she could speak to the immigration officials and explain her predicament to see what they advise, then?

I can't believe that, in this day and age, people are getting away with bullying in the workplace. Regardless of how 'trapped' an employee may be (on a temp. visa or whatever), standing up for oneself and addressing a problem is not grounds for dismissal, so one should not be afraid of confronting one's boss or attempting to resolve it. Providing there is a record of all their behaviour / bullying incidents, plus witnesses willing to testify on one's behalf... Or is this rather naïve of me...?! Basically, what I'm saying is this: just because you're not a permanent resident doesn't give anyone the right to treat you as a second-class employee. They cannot sack you for no reason and, if they do, surely they can't just throw you out of the country? Just make sure you pre-empt such a situation by recording when / where / how they 'abuse' you, and get witnesses - like someone previously said: have a word with her but make sure it's within earshot of a colleague (whom you've already tipped off and asked to listen on your behalf). Of course, perhaps we should give your boss the benefit of the doubt as she could be unaware of her behaviour if she is suffering the heartbreak of a relationship ending. That said, it wouldn't explain why she acts worse towards you when the boss is not around!! I don't see the benefit in playing her at her own game - it is too risky, it could harm your professional record and, morally, you are sinking to her level. Stand your grand, try and imagine her with a sausage on her nose or something equally demeaning, and start to pity her. Perhaps show that pity and it will confuse her into backing off! If you let her hurt you it will only give her more power to do it again. Bullies thrive on the thrill of hurting people and feeling empowered by the effect they have on others. If all else fails, anonymously leave a therapist's business card on her desk and see how she reacts! ;-) Best of luck and don't give up on Australia because of this setback - try and make sure you're maximising your quality of life OUTSIDE of work (BBQs, day trips, exploring, meeting people, etc.). I-F :-)

My concern with breastfeeding a ten (or even five) year old would be the issue of co-dependency and how it might affect their social skills. I wouldn't want a mummy's boy aged 10, nor would I want to do anything that might increase his risk of getting teased / picked on / bullied. Even 6 year olds can be cruel - imagine what their friends would say if they knew they were still having "bitty bitty"!!?! It's very hard to keep these things private, because little kids can't (and shouldn't) keep secrets, so they'd inevitably tell their friends / teacher and you and your child would be the faces of ridicule around school. It's not worth it. By all means breastfeed until a 'normal' age, say 2 years, but when they start going to pre-school and being away from you, that's when you have to loosen the apron strings and accept that your child is no longer a baby and can get adequate nutrition from other foods / drinks and "mummy milk" is no longer required (or, at least, express it and put it in a cup). Yes, I agree with the bonding thing - I had 3 caesareans and it helped me bond enormously, particularly as I also had very bad PND. I will always be pro-breastfeeding as it cannot be denied that it is the best possible start you can give your child (even if you only manage it for the first few days, as some mothers experience genuine problems and cannot continue), but there's a time to stop and when your child starts asking eloquently - with correct grammar and enunciation - for some breastmilk, then surely it's time to start putting them away. I've tried to word this tactfully as I understand it might be contentious, but everyone's opinion is valid and I hope mine doesn't offend anyone. If so, I apologise in advance... I-F :-)

Car rego / insurance / breakdown cover / pink slip (like an MOT) / repairs / servicing, car seats (if you have kids), health insurance (if on 457 / not PR), health expenses (medical / dental excesses not covered by insurance), optician, prescriptions, ambo cover, home insurance, life insurance (if only in Oz temporarily I believe you can keep your UK cover, just tell them where you're moving to and continue the payments), school stationery / incursions / excursions, school shoes (I see school fees and uniforms have already been mentioned so won't repeat this) / swimming lessons (I think - from my own research - they have around 10 lessons...?), home entertainment bundle (Foxtel / internet / phone or mobile), holiday clubs / sports for the kids, leisure activities / coffees / meals / day trips / exploring, etc. for yourselves, transportation costs (be it bus or tram), daily parking costs in the CBD (or train costs if commuting), ad-hoc house / garden costs, birthday / Xmas gifts, etc. Can't think of anything else for now... that should be enough to keep you going for a while, anyway! ;-) I-F

Let them know they're not alone and that it's nothing to be ashamed of. Most people suffer from depression at some point in their lives and it is not a weakness. Admitting they are depressed is the first hurdle and shows great strength of mind and courage. They WILL get better, with their partner's support and possibly counselling and / or anti-depressants if deemed necessary by their GP. Depression is usually the result of a life-changing experience, trauma, bereavement, stress, etc. Once the trigger has been identified then steps can be taken to work it through. Good luck to them and their partner - they're lucky to have friends such as yourselves to look out for them :-)

When you say 'weaning' I assume you mean to wean off the breast? If mine were born with teeth then I'd be expressing from Day 1 - sorry!

If she keeps going till she's 10, that poor kid will be mentally scarred for life! Just the thought of sucking my mother's breasts when I was a BABY leaves me cold! Oh, and I did breastfeed all 3 of my kids by the way, before anyone thinks I'm anti-BF. I just think there's a cut-off point. For me it was when they developed teeth and started biting... :skeptical:

Trying to work out when my kids would start school / what years they'd go into, if we moved to VIC in Jan 2015 (complete estimate as need to get sponsorship but we're working on that basis as it would enable my 2 eldest to finish the school year at Xmas 2014 and say goodbye to their friends, and then settle in to Aus school at the beginning of their term). My son will be 8 in the last week of Jan 2015, so I'm assuming he would go into Year 3 (which he would have started in Sep 2014 in the UK). My eldest daughter will be 6 in the April of Jan 2015, so I'm assuming she would go into Year 1 (which she would have started in Sep 2014 in the UK). My youngest daughter will only be 4 yrs 5 mths by Jan 2015, so I'm assuming she wouldn't start until Jan 2016, by which time she would be 5 yrs 5 mths and would go into Prep (equiv of UK Foundation?). She would be 1 year behind as her birthday is in August, so in the UK she would have gone into Year 1 by this point (Sep 2015). (I read that they have to turn 5 in the April of their first term, so she would have to wait until she turned 5 in August 2015, and then start the following Jan...?). Does this sound roughly right? Hope I've explained it with enough clarity as to not confuse anyone! Thanks in advance, I-F :wink:

I really hope it still happens for you, Hoff. It's always been our dream, too, and we want to do it before our kids get old enough to have a say in the matter (!) (they're currently 3, 4 and 6). We're just waiting for our mortgage fixed rate to end so we can fix again and then start job-hunting on a 457 (the first of our 3 mortgages (yes, just one house!) ends next Sep, so we'll begin then).

If you wait until you can afford them, you'll be childless forever! ;-)

Ooh that freaked me out - made me want to add "500 cans of baked beans and bottled water" to the shopping list!

I do sympathise! I can't believe how quickly my middle child's feet are growing - she's 4 yrs 5 mths and is a size 12!! That's the same size as my son, and he's almost 7 and 3/4! I used to think the same as you about shoes / Clarks, but I've discovered some very good quality cheaper ones at Brantano - probably around £15-20 brand new, but you can often get them in the clearance sales for around a fiver. Definitely worth checking them out if it saves you some money (and you're not compromising on quality) :-)

I think this is where we were slightly naïve... we read how much the average person spends on a new baby and felt smug when we managed to spend just a quarter of that (buying everything second-hand - i.e. charity shops or car boots - bar the car seat and pram), and then when no. 2 came along we were living in a tiny house with a tiny mortgage and no. 1 wasn't yet at school, and then by the time no. 1 had started school I'd already had no. 3, so had no idea of the cost of uniforms, school trips, school lunches (don't get me started on that - we send them with pack-ups!), football kits, two sorts of shoes for the PE kit (plimsolls for indoor, trainers for outdoor), etc. And now we're in a much bigger house where they're lucky enough to have a room each (although my youngest's is very small and can just fit a junior bed and wardrobe in, so it'll be fun when she outgrows that, lol), and we feel blessed to be in our financial position. That said, I must reiterate that - after we've paid extra off the interest-only mortgage every month (starting from this month, hopefully) - which will basically mean we're paying the same as if it were a repayment but it gives us the option of not paying extra off if we're short one month (like we've been for the past 9 months!) - then we will have around £30 pcm 'spare'. We buy most of our clothes from charity shops, the kids' shoes in the clearance sales at Brantano (I buy whatever's cheap, regardless of size - so long as it's at least their size or bigger - and we stick them in a cupboard until they've grown into them). But if they suddenly need new shoes (like this month, with the trainers / wellingtons / slippers / plimsolls) I have to pay full-price. And my son has lost 2 branded school jumpers this year, and he wound me up by saying "just buy another, mummy"!! He doesn't understand that I buy everything at the beginning of the year as it can only be bought from an online shop with £4.95 p&p, and I can't afford to buy him another at the moment. We spend most of our money on groceries, I think. Yes I could spend less than £165 pw if I gave them 39p beef paste on cheap white bread sandwiches with packs of biscuits and chocolate in their school lunches, but I don't see why their health should suffer just because it would save us money. So every few days I find myself topping up the shopping with fresh fruit, salad, vegetables, etc. If we go out for a meal (e.g. McDonald's or a "2 for £10" pub) we buy 2 adult meals, a portion of onion rings / fries and share it between us or, if at McD's, I'll get a £1.19 wrap, my husband will get a meal and we'll get another meal between the kids. You find ways to make ends meet and yes, you definitely have to be good at managing money. I refuse to get into debt on what I consider to be a good wage (yes it's not much on a single income, but if we both worked then my wage plus some of my husband's would go on childcare, so I have to remind myself of that whenever I feel a bit skint and forget how lucky we are!). If we want something we save for it, or else look round the car boots / charity shops or wait until it's a birthday or Xmas. Of course, this doesn't apply to things that HAVE to be replaced, e.g. white goods breaking down, car repairs, etc. But I do a very comprehensive budget with everything accounted for, although I wish I could put more aside for unexpected tax bills, car repairs, etc.!!

Definitely! Although they're worth every penny :-) We only had three as it increases our odds of being looked after in our old age, hehe ;-) (plus we wanted to confuse people because we already had a boy and girl and they couldn't understand why on earth we wanted another - because obviously, the only reason you'd have a third would be if you have 2 of the same sex and want to try for the other!). Ooh I forgot to mention that 25% of our income goes on alcohol - we were t-total before the kids came along but they drove us to drink! (not entirely true - we have 2 bottles of wine a week...) ;-)