Brummy123

Thanks lovely for all your fantastic advice, I have had a serious conversation with my hubby about all this and after a big emotional chat, I’m going to see a counceler and hopefully we’re going to rent down the south coast and I’m going to change my job (which is good my current one is really bringing me down) im grateful for everyone’s input and support it’s helped clear my cloudy head, I think I had just got myself so far gone, all I needed to do was to reach out for advice, so thanks xxx

Sorry I can’t help but thinking you’re rude, I wouldn’t consider this as helpful/supportive advice so please, leave the kind helpful replies to the rest of these lovely people. Thankyou and enjoy your day...

I really cannot Thankyou enough for taking time out of your life to write to me giving me the most caring advice, you’re an angel! I really have not any support here and felt like a complete Weirdo whilst everyone is carrying on with their regular,all they have ever known lives! So Thankyou it means a lot and I will definetly take your advice on board, I have considered seeing a doctor as I am fully aware my mental health is not well and hasn’t been for quite some time now, I never had an ounce of anxiety or depression in the uk and now it seems to consume me, I think I’m scared to go because I won’t even know what to say. I have never considered counciling I always thought that was what Americans did on the tv but I’m sure I could look into it as i am the first to admit I need some guidance here when it comes to groups I have tried to do gym groups but like yourself I’m not into the gym and found it quite clicky, stuck it out but nothing came of it, I work full time with not great hours and on my day off I tend to help my OH grandmother with her shopping etc so it’s tough to find time, I have tried to go to meet ups for Brits in Sydney but trouble is they’re all on Fridays and Saturdays when I am at work! My husband is wonderful and carry’s a lot of guilty feeling he’s let me down because I’m so unhappy, I think having the discussions you have mentioned will help though as I/ we seem to be in vicious circle! The talk about renting doesn’t go down well as we’ve worked hard to save and sees renting as money down the drain which I agree but it’s not if I’m feeling this way! Thankyou so much again.. x

Wow, what a reply Thankyou so so much.. wish I had posted on here sooner, your advice means a lot yes my husband has a british passport as his mother was born in the uk. He has his own business and recently invested money into it to progress and in the last few months of me realising and being honest that this is really hurting me being away from home it’s made it hard to bring up the conversation of us moving back to the uk because he would have to start all over as the certifications aren’t the same here as they are there, he shuts it down and says he just wants to work hard to give me the life I deserve.. don’t get me wrong he tries to sympathise and is there for me but yeah.. i cringe at the thought of kids right now, I totally agree that bringing kids into the equation isn’t right, right now and I also cannot imagine not having my parents here when I have my first child, they really do want to be close to me/us and we talk everyday but my grandparents are very elderly and my mom won’t leave them understandably. yes I get what you’re saying making those ‘true friends’ Just does not come natural it’s so sad, I also do find social media does more harm than good seeing all my old friends together having a great time and I’m stuck on the sofa or seeing other girls that have moved here (different states) out every weekend having a blast, it’s just not happening for me.. I just feel stuck! thankyou so very much again. Xxx

(First time poster) Hi, just putting this out there to see if anyone is in the same boat as me.. i moved here nearly two years ago to be with my husband who is Australian, I left a fantastic network of friends, great job which I loved and my parents who I’m so very close to being an only child.. I moved here in good faith that this would be a better life for us to bring up children (no kids yet) etc but I really can’t help feeling it isn’t, yes the weather is lovely and all that but I am personally struggling so much to fit in I live in a suburb outside of Sydney and it is very hard to explain this feeling of being a fish out of water and feeling on a completely different wave length to everyone, I work with all girls, a real mix, only one Australian all others have foreign backgrounds.. I haven’t been able to make friends and as a result feel completely lonely and lost.. I’m so disconnected. I just seem to work all the time and sit at home (cook/clean) and repeat. My husband works away quite a bit at the moment and has distanced himself from friends as they weren’t for him anymore (let’s just say they like to party hard- another Eyeopener here is the drug scene!) so we both are struggling to make friends, which he feels guilty about, we’re 27. I am out here completely alone and it’s changing me from a bubbly person into someone who is confused, sad and at times bitter. I don’t have anyone I can talk to or lean on other than him and he is sad his family aren’t there for me too, He of course loves his country and is very patient when I say it’s not for me so far, I do seem to get down an awful lot about even the small things- I miss English food so much, it just isn’t the same here (I’m a real foodie!) and I’m a real girly girl who loves to shop and I have tried so hard but cannot stand the cheap crappy shops here, I even miss how the birds would tweet and chirp on a fresh british morning. ANYWAY we’re desperate to get our own place and a mortgage as our living situation at the moment is really spiralling me into depression on top of everything else.. am I making the wrong decision getting something as serious/ permanent as a mortgage? Do I move out have our own place and see if this is when my true aussie life begins, or am I someone who is a true home bird and will forever feel England is home? I just feel I’m missing this aussie dream people talk about.. So sorry for the long first post I feel I’m just letting it all out in hope for Someone to relate or give advise or something! Thankyou in advance xxxx