grahamffc

I had this same advice back in 2010 from an Aussie colleague who came to the UK before finishing a degree and was going back at 37 to finish it off! It's the main reason I didn't go back in 2010 but not to have got much further with it in two years wasn't in the plan. I don't think the extra pressure that placed on me was very constructive and I might have been a bit rash back in August when I got my results which weren't very good, I basically said "screw this, I'm not letting it dictate my life any more".

@scrumpy, going to sleep on it and have a coin ready in the morning by the looks of it!

Thanks Rupert for putting a very level head on all this. My post above was composed before reading your last reply. She moved back in Dec 2010, I went there in Jun 2011 and Jan 2012, and we met in New York in April 2012. You are correct in saying that it does feel somewhat one-sided, its basically because she doesn't earn enough though and went back there with debt. As regards her move itself, quite reasonably I suppose she wasn't willing to stay (or come back now for) a couple more years because she thinks I'd have the same cold feet then too. Bit of a catch-22 really because that in turn doesn't make me feel there is any commitment to me. The Lions tour would be the obvious excuse to validate!

Yes, I could have got a WHV for a year then a defacto partner visa but since that still costs a bomb it seemed like a good idea to get a permanent visa from day one without the limitations of a WHV...in hindsight it would have been a better idea to save my money and make a better informed decision later! Dare I say it, but yes at this moment in time I would quite like the decsion to be taken out of my hands for some reason, either way. I also realise that I must also sound very ungreatful as staying or going are both good options, its not like I am trying to pick the lesser of two evils. There is quite a lot more risk with going than just sticking with the current life I know and enjoy, but there is also the risk of never knowing or always being in limbo if I don't go.

Thanks all. Rupert, that is something which had occured to me, am I correct that it would still be valid for 5 years so long as I validate it within 12 months? I gaurantee if I told her I was delaying it further that she would lose patience but at least I would still have the visa should my circumstances change in the next 5 years. I also note the other points above (especaily the 60 year old uncle crying into his beer at never going!). My bosses-boss and his wife were all set to move to Perth a few years ago but got there and fairly quickly decided it wasn't for them, came back, got on with their lives and are now very settled and successful here. The moral being that maybe had they not gone and tried it they would always have the thought of moving to Australia at the back of their minds and would never have been able to properly move on and make the most of their lives.

Thanks, As much as I love her and spending tienm with her I do have a bit of an issue that she went back when she did as there were no factors forcing her to go back then, she has an EU passport and no ill family members etc. I notice from your signature that you are still waiting for a visa after submiitting police checks etc way back in April. I ws under the impression that it only takes a week or two?

I have applied for a 175 Skilled Migrant visa and just submitted the medicals and police certificate last week. The agent I used says I should be granted a visa within the next couple of weeks. Although I am on a 175, the real reason I'm going is because my girlfriend is Australian and moved back there in December 2010...the intention being for me to move much sooner than this but I wasn't ready to go and still had to complete my professional qualifications (I'm an Accountant). However I have still to complete them all, and while it would be far from ideal I could sit exams in Australia if necesary. In those 21 months since my girlfriend went back to Melbourne I have gradually settled into life without her (but have been over to see her twice, and we met in NY for a week). I have a job which I really enjoy and there is the issue above with my qualification. It does scare me to think of it as being a permanent move, so I started to warm to the idea that I could come back to London after 6 months, then thought if I am going to do that I might as well save myself a lot of hassle and more heartache again and not even bother. Then I think I will always regret not giving it a go in the future...so it goes full circle in my head! I suppose realistically all that I have to lose my giving it a try is my job and some money. I had always intended to get a WHV and go over to Oz for a year but I never got round to it (I'm 31 now) so again may regret that when I'm older. Having spoken to my boss a few times I agreed to give him a final decision on the 1st October...which happens to be tomorrow! I expect to some people (especially on here) this may seem like a no brainer as I have no major ties here other than family and friends. But to me its still a pretty big decision. If anyone has any advice to offer...on the ease of finding jobs (esp accountants in Melbourne), anyone else who had similar experiances etc...it would be much appreciated!