SophW

16 hours ago, lothar said:

Hi All,

We are moving back to the UK in June. 

I remember when moving out to Aus in 2018 I had to clean everything and disinfect everything we shipped. Do we need to do something similar on the way back? I can't find anything on the UK website, they seem more concerned about custom duty than biological hazards

Thanks.

No obligation to answer this at all, but how come you're moving back? Just curious! Appreciate it might be too personal to share.

On 27/09/2023 at 07:05, Island said:

Thanks so much for your message - it was two years ago I wrote that - my boys are. now 16 and 18 years - the older one is thinking of going back for Uni next year after he finishes Alevels - they are having a great life of travel and diversity in europe but the pull of australia is still great and they still feel very Australian.  Did your kids move back first - and then you followed beanbear - did you tell them at the time you would follow in a few years? Did you move back to the same part of oz?  For my own part, I'm loving life in Bristol so much - love the woods, love the village life, love my job and the kids school and being in Europe - all the travel and the cold weather too (menapause!!) but I understand the pull for them and definitely want them to follow their dreams and return for uni if they still want to...and we will follow at some point...

Please keep us posted on what you do - I would love to see how it all works out for you and your family  

On 04/12/2018 at 05:13, juliaoz01 said:

So we moved to Perth from the north east England back in April. We had lived in Sydney in 2004 for a year in our twenties as backpackers and just loved it. Since then we have been back about 6 times. We love the east coast but have found housing very expensive and work (welding anyway) not particularly well paid. So, we settled on Perth as housing is cheaper, work is better paid and there’s more opportunities and the climate is better. However, we both are very miserable here. We always wanted to move here for a ‘better’ quality of life but that’s just not happening. My partner has managed to get work ok but the days are very long and we hardly see him. When we do he’s knackered. He is getting more and more depressed as he doesn’t get to spend the time he wants with our four year old son. I am pregnant with twins and due pretty much any time now. It has been really hard to meet people, and the acquaintances we have formed all tend to be from the UK or New Zealand. Australians either can’t understand us which is fair enough, or just don’t get us. Especially at work my partner has found it hard just getting along with people which is very unusual. 

We also have 3 dogs and aside from the beach there’s just nowhere to take them. They have to either be on a lead or arent allowed. The beaches are nice but finding one without huge rips and that are dangerous is hard work.

I feel like such a whinger but worst of all I feel like a fraud. We spent the last 14 years desperate to get back here, but I think we aren’t the people we were then and Australia isn’t the country to fulfill the dreams we had in our twenties. But we left England because we weren’t happy and thought life here would be that much better. But the isolation, the work and the amount of rules and regulations they have here for everything is just making things so much harder. Aside from the weather, I don’t know if I want our children growing up here as there are so many social issues. I know 9 months isn’t a long time but we have that feeling of dread in the pit of our stomach all the time and it’s just eating away at us. Is this normal and/or has anyone else moved out here just to feel like they’ve made a big mistake?

Hi from a fellow geordie! I know this post is from some time ago, but curious to know if you ended up back in the UK? Either way, I hope all worked out well!

On 27/09/2023 at 07:05, Island said:

Thanks so much for your message - it was two years ago I wrote that - my boys are. now 16 and 18 years - the older one is thinking of going back for Uni next year after he finishes Alevels - they are having a great life of travel and diversity in europe but the pull of australia is still great and they still feel very Australian.  Did your kids move back first - and then you followed beanbear - did you tell them at the time you would follow in a few years? Did you move back to the same part of oz?  For my own part, I'm loving life in Bristol so much - love the woods, love the village life, love my job and the kids school and being in Europe - all the travel and the cold weather too (menapause!!) but I understand the pull for them and definitely want them to follow their dreams and return for uni if they still want to...and we will follow at some point...

Hope you don't mind me asking, but do you miss Oz at all? X

On 09/11/2023 at 08:06, JZT said:

 

@SophW I thought I would add that regardless of what we decide to do/ what happens in the future I will always be glad and grateful that we have had the opportunity to have this adventure and experience of living in Australia. 
I can wholeheartedly say it has been harder than I anticipated. Probably partly because when we fell in love with Australia and decided we wanted to try living there we were just the two of us, whereas we now have a little one so that brings different emotions. I lost a parent at a young age so have always had the (possibly slightly morbid) mindset that life can be so short for some people and that I should try and live it to the fullest as much as possible while I can. As hard as parts of this adventure have been so far it is also so wonderful and amazing in so many ways and I know that we could always go ‘home’ if we wanted to. Yes it would cost money etc but it will always be there whereas the opportunity for us to experience life in Australia may not have come again.  

Ah sounds like a great position to be in!  Really admire people brave enough to make the move. We were in Oz in June and I can absolutely see the appeal of living there. Wish you every success, no matter where in the world you may end up x

On 19/04/2023 at 02:39, JZT said:

Hey Jem! We really like it so far, though I am struggling a bit at the moment which is frustrating as it’s something we wanted to do for so long. I think the reality of knowing no one has sunk in a bit. My husband loves it! 
We are in Brighton, what suburb are you in? 

Hope you don't mind me asking, but have things settled for you?

Hello @Homesick1 you sound like you're having a really rough time. I remember your older posts and how unhappy you were in Oz. I can't see in this thread whether you feel settled here? You sound very concerned about everyone else-which is lovely- but don't forget about yourself.

Sending good wishes from a fellow north-eastener! 

6 hours ago, Marisawright said:

Proudpreston has often said that she can't leave Oz because her boys are here and they won't move back.  It's a story you'll hear often here.  So many people move to Australia, start a family and then stay because they feel it's better for the kids, even though they feel terribly homesick themselves.  They tell themselves they'll all move back when the kids are a bit older, or when they  retire.  But then, the kids grow up Australians, marry other Australians, have Australian kids themselves -- and then retiring back to Blighty means leaving them behind.

Some homesickness is normal when you migrate, but I do think that if people are still feeling 'the pull' after the first couple of years, they should pack up and go home, regardless of any financial advantages. Migration only works (in the long term) if you're able to commit to your new country wholeheartedly.  Some people can, some people can't. I don't think it's something you can control.

 

Thank you. As an aside, I've seen many of your replies on here and I think you're always so constructive and measured in your responses to everyone  

2 hours ago, proud preston said:

@SophW Marisa’s response is spot on. I feel I can’t ever leave as the kids (adults now!) have no intention of returning to England/Ireland. As I often jokingly (?) say ‘self imposed exile’! Wouldn’t be so bad if Aus was nearer. I dread the thought of that awful flight. Going back in 2 days and feel nauseous just thinking about the long flight. 

I'm sorry you're in that situation  I know what you mean about the flight. I did it in June and I couldn't really understand the 'only 24 hours away' - it's a long, long way and a lot of travel!

On 10/10/2023 at 17:44, proud preston said:

@OzukOzuk oh my word! I’m in England visiting friends and family and had that realisation too- I’m neither English nor Australian. English friend talking about the careers they are in - same as mine - but widely different from mine in Australia. Talking about things they watch on telly. When I’m in Aus I can’t ease into conversation about things that are uniquely Australian. I feel I don’t really fit in anywhere anymore and feel sad about this. However …….as much as I yearn for all things English - I do (eventually) realise my life in Aus is a good life (albeit missing family and friends) England seems very costly now. My home town has shops and pubs boarded up - as many UK towns do. I’m craving for an England that doesn’t really exist any more. The word ‘hiraeth’ comes to mind often 
We moved over when our boys were 5 and 3.  I’ve been homesick for 16 years! but……(especially on this trip) I really do realise that our life is good in Aus and I can continue to visit the UK. You’ve time on your side. I do believe it’s very common - with migrants who scatter all over the world - that longing for familiarity. I’ve spent far too long thinking about the UK and really missing out on ‘enjoying the moment’ (!) in Aus. We are so fortunate that we have this choice - even though it drives us crazy. All the best. You’re not alone in your thoughts and feelings. 

Hope you don't mind me asking, but do you think you'll stay in Oz given how you've felt on this trip to England?

Best of luck with whatever you do! I was in Australia in June and can absolutely see the appeal for bringing up kids. 

Glad it's all worked out for you here in the UK, and you've got your Aussie memories to boot! x 

On 24/10/2020 at 13:28, tea4too said:

We visited my brother and his family soon after their immigration to Aus, excited to see first hand everything they loved about their new life. It was a happy trip and we have been back several times, but even on that first visit we struggled a little to see the world through their eyes.

To some extent their friends were even more challenging as a fair few assumed we were on a recce and looking to emigrate ourselves. Trying to explain that Aus was great but home was in beautiful Wales and no, the weather wasn't a deal breaker, no we didn't hibernate for six months of the year, yes we do have a nice home in a nice area and enjoy our lifestyle... all seemed to fall on stoney ground. It made for some awkward moments and I'm sure at least one woman thought I was criticising her new life by seemingly rejecting it for my own family. The tumbleweed was huge and fast moving.

But in answer to your question bug family, I knew from the get-go that I don't need to move to Aus to find what we already have, but it took a few years more and reading lots of PIO threads to realise there is no simple answer to what people need in order to feel that they belong. Most of us only know when we have lost or found whatever 'it' is. T x

I absolutely love the last paragraph of your post, T. Since coming back from Australia for my honeymoon in June, it's all I've thought about. Without getting too deep, I'm 34 and never really travelled while at uni (like many do). My theory is that I've seen an amazing part of the world and want to see more, but realistically I can't take a year off work and bugger off I also need to think about my biological clock which is currently battling with my desire to go see the world. Similar to you, I am really happy and settled here, although grateful 2 weeks in Oz opened my eyes to the world out there and how short life can really be. Your post has helped me in ways you probably don't realise, so thank you. X

On 20/01/2021 at 15:08, JulesBax1980 said:

The background

I've had to create a whole new username because I can't remember my old one lol...but if anyone remembers we emigrated to Melbourne in Jan 2012 and on our way out there whilst waiting for our flight from New York (we had a mini holiday) I stumbled across a post on here from someone who was also heading to the airport but felt as though they were making the wrong decision ... only to find out that person was my husband  he was the driver behind the move so he obviously felt he couldn't talk to me at this late stage! That kind of set the scene for our adventure really...I'm not one to hold a grudge and tend to be positive but each time things weren't going our way I guess I felt angry...because OZ wasn't my dream, it was his. Yet he had planted the seed that he wasn't sure and this became a circle. I never much cared for OZ when travelling in 2007 and spent most of my time looking under the mattress in our campervan for spiders and didn't ever feel I could relax lol.

The Move

We moved to Point Cook mainly because that's where Brits recommended and the houses seemed appealing and cheap compared to the Bayside. But the shiny new appeal soon wore off and I craved some culture and the features found in old houses and suburbs that are more established. I remember many days we would go out walking and wouldn't see a single person out and about on our whole estate. Bizarre. So we moved to Sandringham and I feel that's when life began for us. I had a fantastic job in admissions at a gorgeous little grammar school in St Kilda and enjoyed nipping for coffee on Chapel street or walking round Albert Lake on an extended lunch break. The hubby was happy not to be stuck in traffic morning and night and that meant he could enjoy his job (only a little mind lol) ... as a plumbing and heating engineer of 18 years in the UK he still wasn't qualified in OZ and so that frustrated him but he managed to get a job installing central heating. We lived in an apartment opposite the beach practically, Coles across the road, cafes, bakeries ... the train station a two minute walk and we loved life. Then our daughter came along and boy did that change things. She had several issues including an allergy to dairy, low birth weight, sleep apnoea ... having a baby seemed so much harder in OZ. Supermarkets don't stock everything like they do here... there's no argos as a back up for absolutely everything lol. I went to my doctors several times and they told me my expectations of a newborn were too high despite me telling her she cried morning noon and night and that my mum (who was visiting for three months) had never seen a child like it and she had 6 of her own!. When she was three months old and able to fly we went home for a planned holiday and to christen her and we never returned. Luckily I had friends who shipped my things back and sorted everything out there for us. The doctor here quickly had her assessed and prescribed a dairy free milk and she blossomed and wasn't in pain all the time. She went on to have an operation (tonsils and adenoids) before she started school here and now she sleeps soundly and things are easier. 

Life in the UK

Whilst on holiday here my husband was offered a job offshore and we didn't feel we could turn it down. So we stayed and he worked offshore for long enough for us to buy a house. He now works self-employed onshore and I have my own events business that I've built up. We spend a lot of time together and things are good in general. We got a puppy in lockdown which now makes things harder as it takes a minimum of 7 months for her to be in a position where she is ready to fly. But we never thought it would be forever in the UK and we like an adventure so we made sure we got resident return visa's but they run out in April 2022. So now we have the dilemma ... do we return and inevitably eat in to a lot of our savings/equity from the house or do we stay and have a move within the UK? So there are two questions I'd like help with...

1. As our daughter has citizenship and we only have PR (due to run out in April), is there any way in the future that we would be granted a visa if she went back? So as parents of a citizen? 

2. Are there any stories of a ping pommer who actually then settled out there? 

Thanks in advance  

Hello. Hope you don't mind me asking when your original post was a couple of years ok, but did you go back to Oz in the end or stay in the UK? X

On 10/08/2023 at 00:47, Huntersmummy said:

Hey!

Congrats firstly for your marriage!

So to cut a long story short, during my previous light hearted posts…I’ve struggled a bit since moving here. Living in Darwin for years then Perth seemed tempting. Perth FOR ME, wasn’t greener. Plus having to stay here due to the husband not wanting to go back….good ole hauge convention law which prevents me from taking the kids back without a lengthy court battle. So yeah that’s why I’m still here, being a indecisive fart in the wind of making the best out of a situation. ✌ 

Ah bless you, thank you! We were supposed to go to Oz in 2020, but...the rest is history! I''m so sorry to hear about your husband not wanting to go back and the impact that must have on you. I also see you've been receiving some PMs about your post which is totally uncalled for. I look at this forum out of interest and it's good to hear different opinions. Whatever the future may hold, I wish you all the best and really appreciate you taking the time to reply to me  xx

Hi @Huntersmummy

I've bee somewhat obsessed with this forum since me and my husband had our delayed honeymoon to Oz in June. I noticed in previous posts that you wanted to return to the UK - do you mind me asking what made you stay in Oz all these years later? 

I'm sure living in Oz is nothing like a two week honeymoon, but boy did we have an incredible time!  X