MumOfTwo

I really do, and my heart goes out to you because the emotions can be so strong at times. I don’t think you’re being ungrateful at all. You haven’t criticised Aus, you’ve simply stated how your feelings are not what you anticipated - and you’re definitely not alone with that! 
 

I’m a few suburbs down Wanneroo Road, in Hocking We must be living parallel lives! Where in the UK are you from? I’m from the North West (Cheshire/Manchester).

On 26/03/2021 at 13:04, JJNot said:

Hi! So we (me, husband and two girls 5 and 1) moved to Perth last year during the height of Covid. It was very stressful, but we were so grateful to be able to get out of the UK and live normal lives here. Moving to Australia had been everything I wanted and worked so hard for. I wanted a better life for myself and my family. My Dad and brother live here and I had been out to visit a few times and loved it. I kept thinking this is the best place to raise a family. I know we'd miss family in UK but I had family here so thought it would be OK. Unfortunately, not long after our arrival there was a big family fall out. Although everyone is back on talking terms, nothing is like it once was. My girls are very happy here, especially my eldest. Both my husband and I have good jobs and earn good money. But for some reason, I am miserable!! I cannot seem to settle or make many friends. I miss my family back home so very much. I now suffer from the worst anxiety and I don't know what to do. I was the complete driving force behind the move here and now I regret it so much. I just don't know what to do. I am very close with my Mum and inlaws and I know they are missing the girls terribly. But they were also so supportive in our move here. 

Did anyone else struggle when they arrived in Oz and how long did it last for? or did anyone go back to the UK and was actually really happy with their choice??

Sorry to hear you are going through these emotions. I can totally relate as I have been through it all. The initial feelings of guilt and homesickness can be debilitating at times, but they will pass, or ease at least. 
 

Well done for seeking help to get you through this difficult patch

I’ve now been in Perth for 11 years (with a couple of stints back home for visa reasons/birth of first child). I’m also in Perth with two boys aged 6 and 8 months. 
 

All I can say, from my experience, is that kids are happy when their parents are happy. They don’t care about the material things like nice houses, good jobs etc. I’ve also realised those things are not as important as I believed they were when I moved back here with my then 5 month old in 2015. Yes it’s great to have these nice things and sunshine but at what expense? I also find it incredibly hard not having support with young children. I have another baby now who is 8 months and most days I just wish my Mum was here to help. It’s great that your eldest has settled well but after a few years in Perth you will have visited all the attractions and may find it boring. The intense summer heat also makes it difficult getting out with kids (especially babies) so I’m finding we’re confined to our home and air con for half of the year. My son also loves to go on holidays and travel and we’re very limited here with where we can go. We’ve done down south many times and have been to Singapore which is awesome for families but otherwise travel within Australia is very expensive. 
 

You clearly came out here with the best intentions and if you weren’t feeling so guilty/homesick you’d probably be happy with your decision. Those feelings will ease so maybe give it another 6 months then reassess. How does your partner feel?

Your kids are young enough to cope with a move back if that’s what you choose. They just need a happy Mum so don’t be afraid to put your feelings and wants/needs first. I’ve finally reached that point and we are hoping to move back to the UK soon.

Just out of curiosity, what suburb of Perth are you in? 

Well done - it sounds like you’re taking the right steps to make the best of the situation. Good for you

Ah yes, north Way-els () is lovely. I must say though, i’m not a huge fan of south of the river. Feels like a totally different place whenever I go down there (we are north) but I do like Freo (to visit, not live). 

If we do move back to the UK I know it will need to be while my eldest son is still in primary school. After that I think it’s hard for kids to move and I’ve learnt from other people who stayed until their kids grew up and now they feel stuck as their kids have started families of their own. I almost envy people who never left home and are just content with their lives. That just wasn’t me though . 
 

Well I wish you the best of luck with work and the holiday home. Really hope it all works out well for you!

Oh definitely! Most of us probably came out here with the mindset that we can be back home in 24 hours if needed. I have a 7 month old baby now that none of my family have met yet. My heart breaks for those who have lost loved ones and not been able to get back to say goodbye or attend funerals

My partner graduated in 2014 but wasn’t able to get a job. Last year they started recruiting graduate paramedics so he was successful and is currently doing his induction. He’ll be on road from April  

I’m from the North West - Manchester/Cheshire. I originally came here in 2010 to travel but emigrated in 2012 and have been here since with the exception of 9 months in the UK in 2014/15 when I had my first son. 

As much as homesickness and missing friends and family is still an issue for me, it’s now more about wanting to live somewhere more exciting where it doesn’t feel like Groundhog Day and there’s something or somewhere new to experience. I guess the isolation of Perth is taking its toll on me and I just don’t look forward to things like I used to?
 

I would like to think that a move back is possible but my partner has waited so long to get his career going that I wouldn’t ask him to move unless he has a guaranteed job lined up. It’s not been easy with travel restricted for so long as visits usually help to keep me going. It’s almost 2 years since we’ve been back (May 2019). 

Have the circumstances changed with your wife and kids? Are they still wanting to stay here? I hope you’ve managed to find some peace with being here to keep you sane. It’s not easy when you feel the pull back home.

Where in the UK are you from? And are you south or north of the river here?

Unfortunately not But I think we’re sorted on the visa front

He will be sponsored by an employer in the UK. If that falls through, we will be applying for the spouse visa.

Thank you for the reassurance. My partner has lived in the UK briefly when I gave birth to my first son, and he has 3 cousins living there now so some family connection. He’s originally from South Africa though his immediate family are here in Perth. I’m hoping the proximity to so many countries and his job will be enough to make him feel settled there. He agrees Perth isn’t where he wants to grow old, so fingers crossed we’re all happy with the move

We’ve made the big decision to move our family to the UK, but I’m feeling very nervous, almost guilty, about uprooting our 6 year old son and the potential heartache and suffering it’s going to cause him.

I’m originally from the UK - met my partner here in Perth and we have two sons (Mr 6 who was born in England and came back out here with us at 5 months old, and last year we had another son, who I know will adapt no problem being so young). 
 

I guess I’m just looking for reassurance around my 6 year old to help put my mind at ease. 
 

Does anybody have a positive story to share? Have your children settled well in the UK? Any tips or things I should be aware of to help make it easier on him? 
 

I’m so scared of this move changing him for the worst. He’s such a happy little soul and I don’t know how I’d cope with the guilt if the move makes him miserable

Thanks in advance.

Hi @bug family - I just came across your post and wondered how you are getting on/where you are up to with your progress and plans. My family (myself, partner and two sons - 7months and 6years) are also in Perth and I feel very much the same way about life here as you. My partner is also training to be a paramedic. Have you completed your studies yet?