Hi Lady Rainicorn - yeah I keep telling my hubby that the better life we migrated to Oz for is actually waiting for us back at 'home' - except hubby insists that 'home' is now Sydney, hence the many circular conversations resulting in the same polar opposite views - son is nearly 7 and both myself and OH are not even mid 40s yet - hubby says we are too young to retire and he will soon be bored back in old stomping ground - he also blames my grief - my dad passed away 2 months ago and I was lucky that I flew over to be with him at the end. During those weeks visiting hospital every day, I reconnected with family and had a 'wtf am I doing' realisation that my hubby missed out on cos he was still in Sydney keeping our Aus life going. I've tried to build a life here with play dates and mother's groups and work friends are great, but it feels pretty vacuous compared to my sister and surviving mother now living alone - feel a real pull to get back there and do my bit but then I don't want to stuff up the future of the only Australian in the family, my little aussie battler. I don't want to be selfish - I want everyone to feel good about this... argh!!!!