Hi Indecisive, when reading your post it felt like you could have been writing about me! I have also been here 10 years with my husband and after the birth of my first child I had exactly the same feelings as you describe. 4 years on and I have had another baby and the longings for my family and friends in England are once again at the very forefront of my mind...
Similarily to you, my husband also has no interest in going back whatsoever.... He would I suspect, if I forced the issue, but I don't want him to resent me for it.
I don't have any advice as such for you, because I am in the very same position! but from someone who has felt this way for over 4 years all I can say is be honest. Be honest with yourself, and be totally honest with your husband no matter how hard that conversation is. Talk openly about your feelings and don't bottle them up - since talking with my husband I have already felt 100x better. There will be no easy outcome and it's hard when suddenly the dream life that you have been living is turned upside down by feelings you never expected prior to children. Something about having kids makes you re-evaluate and think deeply about family and the people you left behind.
Also, it's not easy when you have little family support and hardly any babysitting options!! Even harder with the second!
We have discussed a temporary return but it's difficult when property, businesses and schooling are involved. So much to consider and so much cost involved in a temporary move.
Please feel free to message me if you want to chat further... And keep smiling. It's easy to get bogged down thinking about it I know, especially when you can't see a solution. X
