Katie22

The best thing to come out of this would be for Juncker and his cronies to get out and the whole EU reformed whereby we share trade and controlled migration. As it is it seems that the EU body is a corrupt and capitalist organisation. The sad thing is that Britain and Europe now seems divided and this is the fault of not only past and present British politicians but European leaders and the EU itself.

Surely if the EU give the UK such a hard time in negotiations then this would not help their cause at all, it would only prove to the other doubters what a bullying organisation they really are and give even more power to the far right groups. Best thing is to let the dust settle and no one to make any rash decisions. None of those European leaders want to destroy their relationship with the UK, it will probably only be the bitter, spiteful EU leaders who do.

An Irish colleague of mine was surprised when I shared with her that despite having been in Australia for over seven years I hadn't applied for citizenship. She applied immediately upon living here for the mandatory period of time to be eligible (four years I think?) and is awaiting a date for the ceremony. When i asked her why she'd applied, she described it as an "insurance policy" against any future changes to immigration legislation, so that even if she went home to Ireland for a period of time she'd always have the opportunity to return here if she wished. Personally, I did briefly toy with the idea of applying for citizenship in 2014 when I was stung for the cost of a Resident Return Visa during a trip back home, but instead elected not to. When it came down to it, it just didn't feel like a very honest thing for me to do. I currently live in Australia but only because my (Australian) partner wanted to spend some time back here. I've never felt at home here and feel no affinity with this country and so that in all honesty making a pledge to the place seemed well, dishonest, in truth.

 

I just wondered though how many P.I.O. members have either got citizenship or are planning to apply for it and what prompted it? Was it because you feel Australian now (perhaps more than you feel British), or because you want to display your commitment to your adopted country or because you want the ability to come and go with the ease that comes with holding an Australian passport? Or, is there another reason that I haven't touched upon?

I feel much the same about Australia as you do to be honest. Will have been here 14 yrs next month but I got my citizenship many years ago as soon as I was eligible. My main reason was the right to vote - live here permanently, pay taxes, children being brought up here etc so felt I needed to. My second reason was because of my kids, felt that they needed that security to give them choices in the future so I needed to follow suit.

I don't think it's dishonest. Might be if you really hated the country but I don't hate it, I just hate being trapped living here. It's a good country to live in and full of great people but it's just not where I want to live. I'm actually going back in July - finally! No idea how it'll work out but it feels right even after so many years. I'm trying to be realistic though. Having that Australian passport does give me something to fall back on.

On the other hand, if the UK and Australia didn't offer dual citizenship, then it would have been completely out of the question for me!

Tricky one as it's inevitable that everyone has last minute jitters before a big move. Are all of you feeling the same? If you don't go, will that be the end of it or will you both wonder "what if" in 6 mths, 6 yrs down the line? If you're not happy here now, why are you going to be happy deciding not to go?

Sometimes I really do think we overthink things. Get one doubt in your mind and focus on it then it will multiply and then the genuine fear sets in. Breaking through that wall of fear though can be very liberating and open the door to many opportunities.

Good luck with the decision. And if you decide not to go, it really isn't the end of the world. X

I'm moving back any time between May and July next year. Been 2 yrs since made decision and not changed my mind since. Went back several months ago for reccie as was expecting to feel a little "different" but if anything, it made us all even more sure. Good luck to everyone else making the move X

She was a massive support to many of us who are struggling and have struggled in Australia. I got to know her well via FB but unfortunately never had the privilege to meet her in person. She was a kind, thoughtful, positive, funny and amazingly supportive woman and will be missed by so many.

Since she arrived back in the UK, she was so happy and thoroughly enjoying life that it's a blessing she finally got to return to England which is where she wanted to be.

I think pomstar has imploded- another one who drops a stink and clears off. Cowardly.

Not surprised they haven't come back, you lot are like a pack of wolves in for the kill!

It may surprise you but MBTTUK is also read by prospective migrants. I know that I did as I thought it important to be aware of the potential pitfalls. However if this was populated solely by bitter, angry or regretful migrants there would be no balance. The important thing about any forum is to balance the views from different perspectives; returnees should not be free to make any unsubstantiated allegations about a country and its people they wish to without fear of contradiction.

 

I also find that posters are rightly taken to task when they post that they are escaping the UK because it is going to the dogs or similar such nonsense. I don't actually see any of the long term ex-pats who post on this forum slating people who choose to live in either country.

 

In this instance the OP was not criticising Australia so much as the people who would choose to live there which is nasty and gratuitous in my view.

Not sure if it surprises me that the prospective migrants read the MBTUK posts but it does a little that the happy expats do, however at the end of the day like you say we need balanced opinions and everyone has a right to say what they want.

When I first read this post I read it that the poster was either very unhappy at the time of writing or it was a wind up and they knew exactly what reactions they were going to get.

And to all prospective migrants out there, don't worry it's only a minority of expats who do not like living in Australia!

Sorry to say that I agree with a lot of Pomstar's comments and after reading the original post, knew exactly what would follow. What I don't get about this forum is that when a post on the MBTUK site comes up, you always get posters who are happy in Oz slamming them down and basically telling them to pee off if they don't like it. I didn't discover this forum until I decided to move back to UK and googled it. It was then a breath of fresh air to find MBTUK with useful info and some like minded folk but wasn't long before I realised quickly that the happy expats will very quickly contradict and argue with you. And I couldn't quite get why they did that as if they're so happy here, why does it bother them that a minority of expats don't share your views?

A lot of the posts written on here are written when we're feeling anger, sadness, excitement etc and that's how they should be read too. Some are obviously also written to cause a stir and they're always successful - well done Pomstar! Also, you can't judge somebody's whole life through a few short sentences. The OP went on to say that they've had good times, travelled and made friends so haven't been wallowing in misery for 10 yrs like some posts have suggested.

It can be very easy to tell people who are unhappy to pack up and leave but everybody's circumstances are different and life is never quite that easy.

From a fellow expat who will soon be leaving, I wish the OP and their family all the best in their future X

It's one thing being accepted by the university for domestic fees but then you have to apply for the finance if you cannot afford to pay upfront.

https://www.gov.uk/student-finance/who-qualifies

Looks like you could have been ok if you'd moved to a European country rather than a commonwealth one.

Why is it so wrong to want to live overseas? If an Australian family wanted to relocate back to Australia and send their child to university, then I don't believe there are any residency requirements and I certainly wouldn't think they're cheeky for doing that either. Yes, if they're getting free fees but that's not the case, they have to pay the same as other Australian citizens.

i suppose at the end of the day it's to stop people from sending their kids to uni in England and then them leaving the country again and not repaying their loans which is fair enough but 3 yrs I think is still a long time to wait it out for the genuine ones who intend to live in UK permanently.

Also, it's not as if you get cheap fees at home status as they're hardly cheap.

But rules are rules.

Yes, unfortunately you have to be resident in UK or Europe for 3 yrs prior so considered international up to that time. Each individual university will assess his fee status once they've given him a place. They may consider him for home fees if he or you have had regular (as in yearly) trips back to England and close ties there eg house etc. Having the same problem as I'm moving back with my daughter once she's finishes yr 12 this year.

i can understand there should be some conditions but 3 yrs seems a long time for person who was born in UK, lived in UK and parents worked in NHS & paid taxes for 20 yrs before leaving country. Seems a bit unfair - would have thought 1 to 2 yrs residency would be bit fairer for born and bred UK citizens but there you go ..... Such is life!

We're still going and will try our hardest (forced to stay in Oz for many years as couldn't take her away from her dad who lives here) to plead our case but if no luck she'll either wait out the 3 yrs or return to Oz to study.

........I don't think so as they are more a debit card...!...(It won't help you build credit, since your prepaid card activities aren't tracked by credit bureaus, )

 

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.......hope this helps...http://www.creditcards.com/credit-card-news/help/9-things-you-need-to-know-about-prepaid-cards-6000.php

Yep sure, did say it was just a shot in the dark. Just coincidence that I was talking to a friend yesterday about returning and setting up a credit history again and after googling, that was something I came across as a last resort but obviously not accurate. Also, getting yourself on the electoral roll is evidently a good start too.

Just a shot in the dark here but do the pre-paid credit cards give you a credit history? Obviously as you load them with money they can't refuse giving you one.

I reckon the pitfalls of any new migrant is comparing. Inevitable to start but after a while it'll bring you down especially when you're homesick and longing for familiarity. Wow, 30 yrs living in Oz and then move to England, that's a massive undertaking and can imagine a massive culture shock too.

I know very little of Southampton despite having lived in Bournemouth for several years but will be honest, have never heard great stories of the place and obviously never had any desire to visit it either. As lots of other posters have said, maybe a different town/city might be the go. I've lived in Canterbury, Salisbury and Shrewsbury and all lovely places to live so am sure plenty more out there too. You're not going to get the bistro scene of Sydney but once you're more settled in an area then surely you'll get to know more of the local cafes/restaurants that will suit you more.

I'm going back to UK for trip next week and did plenty homework on transport. Yes, train fares are very expensive but you can get them cheaper with buying in advance and railcards. Coaches lot cheaper but I know that's not everyone's cup of tea but I'm more than happy sitting with a good book myself.

Maybe, if you're feeling this down, focus on the reasons why you're there. Plan a short trip to a European city, day trip to London, book tickets to theatre, concert or whatever appeals to you. I've never been to Tasmania but if you moved there not sure the bistro scene of Sydney would be there either. Hope you start to feel better about it all soon!

I've Been in Queensland now 10years and for the last 4 years have missed home.

my difficulty is that my marriage is just about to break up and my boys are 19 and 17 and will not move back at all.

i don't blame them but it makes my decision hard.

im also scared to fit back in.

anyone on here moved back and felt the same

Yes, I have felt and feel the same. Been here 13 yrs. Came here for my husband but I never settled, was just hoping to stay here for few years but then got trapped. He never wanted to return so I stayed for the children to grow up here as could not take them away from him. We split up properly last year and then I decided to move back but I'm very very lucky in that both my 20 yr and 17 yr old want to come with me. Would I feel the same if they didn't? Yes, I would but would be heartbreaking to leave them too. However, one's an adult and one finishes school next year and will then be itching to leave herself. After a 20 yr marriage ending, I am not only facing a future that was very different to the one I was anticipating - death do us part and all that - but my children are now embarking on their own lives and I need to make one for myself too.

Saying that I'm scared (very!) so all 3 of us are going back for a trip in 2 weeks time to get a feel of the place, do some exploring and then make the definite decision on whether to move or not. If your sons are adamant they do not want to return then maybe just plan on going back initially for a year and then review the situation. During that time they may very well plan on visiting you and their minds may change. But you need to live your life for yourself as well as your family. Is it any more selfish than migrating in the first place which all of the posters here including myself have done? I often regret taking my children away from their extended family, their school, their friends just because my husband wanted a "better life" for them which what he really meant was a better life for him. My ex has told me the move will end in "disaster" but to be honest I couldn't give a monkeys what he thinks!

I think your biggest hurdle is your kids not wanting to go to be honest, not necessarily their education (they'll be fine!) nor your pensions - if you had a written guarantee that you'll live to your 90's then maybe, but seriously, life is fragile - here one day, gone the next - make sure you've got some sort of income but listen to your heart too and live for today.

If you both like security and not taking risks then thrash it out with other options. Maybe your husband could go over first to get a job, house hunt etc then you join him later, maybe you could take the kids over for a holiday to see how they'd like living there, maybe you could go over for an extended period to test the water or job hunt from over here to see whats around. None of those options entail letting go of your life here until you're sure.

It is quite interesting though that a previous poster mentioned if you were in UK wanting to come here, people would say go for it, whereas when it's the other way around its just "different" though I reckon the UK is way more of an exciting place to be when you're a teenager than here - all that good music, concerts, festivals, fashion, nightlife, and massive choice of universities - my 17 yr old daughter would be in heaven!

Good luck with your decisions!

It's not cheap living in Oz as we know. But nor is it cheap living in the UK (or anywhere else for that matter)

 

So, expensive costs of living aside, what advantages are there to living in Oz or the UK?

 

Everyone's different, looking for different things. What makes one person happy doesn't work for someone else

 

 

Most of the time I've lived in Australia, I've secretly dreamed of returning to the UK. That's changed now

 

Sure, Midsomer Murders would have non-Brits believing the UK consists of picturesque villages with village greens and ducks and well-to-do older folk and beautiful homes, etc. And of course, they usually film those shows in the British summer or spring

 

The fact is, though, the UK isn't like a picturesque village for most who live there. Instead, it's an overpopulated little place where the average person lives in an unattractive street in some town or city -- most of them dreaming of escaping to sunshine, space and relaxation

 

Location dictates lifestyle in the UK as it does in Oz and most are forced to live where they work or where there's at least the opportunity of finding a job. This results in depression (especially in UK winter with short grey days) dissatisfaction, unhappiness, bitterness. And to make it worse, houses are crammed together in the UK. It sounds like bare existence. Not much of a life

 

At least in Oz there's more sun than grey. There's more space and even though there are many problems in Oz, particularly with regard to employment/unemployment, it's cleaner here and a more egalitarian society/less 'class' consciousness

 

For the very wealthy in the UK, there's immunity from the grey misery suffered by the majority. But that's true of the wealthy everywhere, so not much point dwelling on it. It's the wealthy who enjoy the quaint, picturesque villages, not the rank and file

 

So, not much to attract me to the UK any longer. And the most unattractive feature of all (and one it would be almost impossible to evade) is the jealousy and bitterness that seems at epidemic levels in the UK. Talk about misery loving company. The comments in UK online news give the impression the entire of the UK is festering with envy. Even if someone's won a lottery or had a stroke of good fortune is enough to have them commenting bitterly and resentfully - as if someone else's good fortune came out of everyone else's pocket

 

Aussies mainly confine their competitiveness to sports. In the UK, it sounds as if many of them endlessly compete with each other -- over material goods. It's really backwards and unpleasant and benefits no-one

 

So, I've begun appreciating Australia, late in the day and I'd rather remember Britain as it was (or at least how I would like it to be) rather than experience the reality

 

Just wish I'd adopted this attitude a long time ago, instead of wasting so many years pining for a Britain that is either gone, or never actually existed

I understand your point of view but you're portraying a pretty depressing view of the UK but as you say everybody's perception is different.

I have half my family here and half in UK. When I compare our lives the Aussie ones are no happier nor more fulfilling and if I'm honest I would say the UK ones are actually happier! I have family and friends in the UK who live in pretty little villages and ones that live in terraced houses in towns and cities. My brother lives in a small terraced house but he's not miserable nor bitter, in fact his house is gorgeous, welcoming, he has lovely neighbours, he has a good job, active social life and has no desire to come to live in Australia even after having visited it about 5 times now so knows exactly what it has to offer.

Also your comment about the UK being materialistic was interesting too as that was the first thing I noticed when I moved here 13 years ago. To me there was this Aussie obsession with owning a home with the yard, the barbie and the pool and an unattractive attitude of "I'm alright Jack". But I've been away from UK for many years now so am sure attitudes and times have changed. However maybe I'm different as my reasons for moving here weren't the same as the majority who migrate now as I was happy with my life there and was not disillusioned with the country itself, in fact my heart was in the pit of my stomach that night I left Heathrow airport.

Once you've lived in another country you then have experience of different ways of living and then just want the best of both worlds which I suppose can lead to ping ponging. I suppose the best option is to accept differences and to accept that you just can't have everything. At the end of the day the whole world is changing, each country is changing and for all of us to be happy where we are living then we need to just accept it and learn to live with it and make the best of it.

Thanks for all your advice.....it's such a tough decision for me as there are many other factors which make this issue far from black and white:

My OH and I are not married.

Its my dad that has the inoperable stage 4 cancer-palliative chemo at the mo.

Mum had a brain hem 5 months ago which resulted in a stroke and paralysis of left side...made a good recovery but still limited with movement-can now drive short distances.

I am the only offspring, friends have been great but they have their own lives!

I could secure a job in the uk if I were to stay.

If we pull out of the house we would have to pay 10 percent of the value, which we could manage at a pinch.

I have been ping ponging back to the uk since we arrived as I struggled with homesickness but could see how much the OH was thriving in Aus. Don't get me wrong I secured a good job, we live in a beautiful place and have some good friends. I just feel its now time for me to go and help my parents in this difficult time. I just need some sort of compromise from my OH!

 

thanks again

Dugong

I can understand your partner being worried about the house but he should be giving you emotional support and trying to find a solution rather than it all being about him. I'm sorry if I'm sounding harsh here but the possibility of a house sale falling through is nothing compared to your dad being diagnosed with terminal cancer and your mum not only having to cope with your dad's diagnosis, but also being poorly herself. If I was your partner then I would be admiring you for your compassion, loyalty, and kindness towards your parents and would be going out of my way to thrash things through to find a solution to keep you in the UK for a while and maybe to continue with the house sale here in Australia. A relationship is about being there for each other, not being number 1 the whole time. Maybe reading between the lines it sounds as if he loves Australia and you are not so sure.

Do what you think is right. If you don't then you will not be able to go back in time to change things. People are way more important than money, and bricks and mortar.

Just repeating what the other posters have said is that you need to be resident in UK for 3 yrs to be eligible for home fees and a loan. However, it is up to the individual university's discretion if you can put up a good enough case for yourself so always worth a try. There's also the option of universities in Europe. Some countries do undergraduate English speaking courses and are even free or way cheaper - worth a thought. The Netherlands have several universities that do that and most of the Dutch speak perfect English as do a lot of countries in Europe. However, I do know where you're coming from, lots of people put England down but the university education there is excellent and some are the best in the world. That's why my daughter wants to go to uni there and is even willing to wait out the 3 years as a last resort.

It sounds like you're probably yr 12 - just guessing here! Maybe start thinking and suggesting about a "gap year"? You could travel over to the UK, spend some time with your family left there, do bit of work, travel and also suss out the universities. You could always apply to an Australian university and defer for a year as a fall back and maybe going to a uni in a city away from home might be an option? Maybe your parents might warm to the idea of a gap year? Anyhow good luck. You're young so just chill and do what makes you happy!

I've just recently seen 2 of these programmes for the first time ever and also watched them from the perspective of being here for nearly 13 years now but soon to be returning back to the UK.

It surprised me a little that they were more realistic with regards to living expenses, jobs etc, than I was expecting but what surprised me the most was the expectations of the wannabe migrants with the houses they want to live in. They say they want to migrate for the outdoor lifestyle, spend more time with the kids and less time working (what's that about - don't you have to work in Oz?!) but I felt the priority was wanting to live in show houses with massive rooms, pool and the latest fad is a cinema room. A more materialistic way of life than more time with the kids sprang to my mind. I live in a lovely house, small but cosy with 3 br, teenage kids love it, no pool, no massive backyard, no cinema room either, live 10 mins drive from the beach and from the city and pay way less rent so I suppose it depends what you're really migrating to Oz for. But at the end of the day these programmes are highly edited and you only get to see what the TV producers want you to see so probably should just be regarded as light entertainment!

Probably biggest reasons are a warmer climate, outdoor life, expectation of a more enjoyable life, and something different I suppose. For some those reasons wear thin as the years go by and then they decide to go back the other way - for something different again!

Very difficult decision if you're not too sure you want to go ahead with it - new home, new job the other side of the world so far away from family and friends - that's exciting if your heart's in it but pretty stressful if it's not. My personal advice would be don't let the only reason you do go ahead to be for a more outdoor life for your child - your child will only be happy if you are happy - and plenty of kids have a happy childhood in the northern hemisphere - I did! Good luck whatever you decide!

Try not to think too much about the "what ifs", chances are a lot of the worst case scenarios are probably only going to happen in your imagination anyway! Be positive, determined and adamant it will work out and it will. Follow your heart and your gut instinct which reading between the lines sounds like the UK - getting that citizenship leaves the door open to return when your heart may tell you something else in years to come. Only natural to get the wobbles especially if you're settled with a good job etc but that leap of faith can lead to many more positive experiences.

My advice is enjoy your freedom while you have it, go back, enjoy London, enjoy Europe, enjoy your family and the best of luck! X

You're still very young and am pretty sure you'll find plenty of opportunities in the UK. Sounds like you've had a pretty difficult few years so maybe moving back might be what you need to recover your spark and you can always come back in years to come if you have your permanent residency. A move to another Australian city might do the trick too. Take some pressure off of yourself and start to be completely honest about which direction you want your life to take - do what makes you happy.

Personally I couldn't cope with living in Darwin just because of the heat and humidity - it would drive me barmy so you must be made of strong stuff! My sister lived there for 2 years and ended up going a little "troppo" by the end of it but thankfully returned back to normal a few months after she moved!

We have a family wedding (wifes sister) back in the UK in July 2016 so are looking to that as 'the' time.

 

Quite funny really as we used a wedding here in Australia as 'the' date to move here too.

 

We LOVE a wedding!

Me too - love a family wedding! I've also got one in July 2016 so that will be the latest I'll move back but hoping it'll be bit earlier. Will enjoy Australia till then :wink: