Hi everyone, I'm an Aussie who's come back from the UK after working there for the last 3 years. I stumbled across these forums during one night of aimlessly searching on the internet because I feel like only other people who have have hauled themselves halfway around the world to start a new life can really understand the confusion and sadness that I'm feeling...
In my day-to-day life here in Sydney, I seem polite, cheery and laid-back when I'm out and about, but at home late at night, I often find myself unable to sleep and wishing I were somewhere else.
After having seen a bit more of the world and lived in the madness known as London, I realise more than ever that Australia is a country that is luckier than most and I should be grateful(and I am!). But so many of the people I know here are so smug, mean and aggressive about living in their own little bubbles, and are always dismissive of the time I went to live and work in the UK as a "silly phase", and simply won't accept that things aren't 100% perfect here in Sydney. They even point out that a lot of Brits come here and me having done the reverse was a dumb waste of time. Every attempt at discussion about things that bother me about the Sydney like the trains, the coward-punchers ruining the nightlife, the Coles-Woolies duopoly, overpriced yet poor value clothes and housing, etc. - well, all those conversations have ended in them saying "well, if you don't like it, get the f*** out". :arghh:
(I am in the process of looking for new friends, lol. Family sadly can't be replaced *sigh*)
Sorry everyone, this is really just me whinging and venting because I'm often censored by friends and family in real life!! Like I'm just supposed to shut up, nod and
agree that Sydney is #1 in the whole wide world because all those magazines sayyyyy soooo... :frown:
I understand that being reminded about the bad things in your hometown is not a pleasant topic of conversation for many, but I'm not rude about it real life. Like if you ever saw me, you'd see that I'm a timid little thing who just wants a bit of discussion and constructive criticism, but apparently that is simply not acceptable for the people around me.
I've never been a beach bunny... I always dash indoors after 15 minutes when the unrelenting sun is out, and hide behind the curtains and switch the aircon on. I find myself often praying that winter would come already, or daydreaming about moving to Melbourne, Tasmania and even New Zealand... or going back to the UK(I have a valid visa to do so)...
I mean, of course I don't wish to be literally flooded underwater like what's happening in the UK right now, but the cold and the grey of typical London days rarely bothered me - I went out for long, leisurely walks there much more often than I do here...
However, the 2 things that make me most hesitant about going back to the UK:
1. parents: they're getting on in years and aren't as sprightly as they used to be, so I'm uncomfortable with the thought of being 20 hours and whole other continents and oceans away - they're very anxious about me going again and are begging me to stick around
2. money: I've been doing sums on a spreadsheet and I always come out as better off financially here, especially in terms of take-home pay, jobs available, expenses and being able to put aside more to grow investments, buy a home and secure my future.
So I came back to Australia because to be closer to family and because I don't want to be a broke bum living from paycheck to paycheck and would actually like to be able to retire before I 'm 70 or 80 or whatever ridiculous age they change it to. But other than maybe two of my old school friends who actually seem to care and want to listen to my feelings, I feel rather frustrated and unhappy in Sydney. As that tired old internet meme goes - "First World problems!".
Like I know things are just as bad or worse in other big cities, but I know deep in my heart that Sydney just is not my cup of tea - it has never been! I've made an effort to live it up here, volunteered for charity, joined clubs, enrolled in classes, etc. I've met good people but they always seem to move overseas eventually(!) while the not-so-great ones stick around... I have even tried moving to different suburbs north, east, west and south of Sydney but no matter what, I've always felt unsettled. I found some old diaries of mine and rediscovered that even as a teenager, I had pined to go elsewhere...
During my time away in the some of the more suburban and quieter areas of London and in smaller cities like Edinburgh and Brighton, I've had more of those "oh, I think I could live here forever" sort of moments than I ever did in Sydney.
I worked in Melbourne for a short little while on an assignment(no more than 2 weeks), and really liked it there. I liked the layout, the trams, the vibe and people there just seemed so much friendlier. However, it was 7 years ago, so I don't know.... maybe it's not like that anymore? Is it still a viable alternative for me?
Does anyone here have any advice? I really respect the journeys and the efforts to find a happier life that the posters here have done... Would really appreciate to hear your thoughts and experiences...
- from someone who's supposedly "home" but is more lost than ever
