JJNot

On 02/04/2021 at 20:34, Dusty Plains said:

Good Point. Perth is perhaps the most isolated city the world. Take it from there.

On 07/04/2021 at 08:17, MumOfTwo said:

Sorry to hear you are going through these emotions. I can totally relate as I have been through it all. The initial feelings of guilt and homesickness can be debilitating at times, but they will pass, or ease at least. 
 

Well done for seeking help to get you through this difficult patch

I’ve now been in Perth for 11 years (with a couple of stints back home for visa reasons/birth of first child). I’m also in Perth with two boys aged 6 and 8 months. 
 

All I can say, from my experience, is that kids are happy when their parents are happy. They don’t care about the material things like nice houses, good jobs etc. I’ve also realised those things are not as important as I believed they were when I moved back here with my then 5 month old in 2015. Yes it’s great to have these nice things and sunshine but at what expense? I also find it incredibly hard not having support with young children. I have another baby now who is 8 months and most days I just wish my Mum was here to help. It’s great that your eldest has settled well but after a few years in Perth you will have visited all the attractions and may find it boring. The intense summer heat also makes it difficult getting out with kids (especially babies) so I’m finding we’re confined to our home and air con for half of the year. My son also loves to go on holidays and travel and we’re very limited here with where we can go. We’ve done down south many times and have been to Singapore which is awesome for families but otherwise travel within Australia is very expensive. 
 

You clearly came out here with the best intentions and if you weren’t feeling so guilty/homesick you’d probably be happy with your decision. Those feelings will ease so maybe give it another 6 months then reassess. How does your partner feel?

Your kids are young enough to cope with a move back if that’s what you choose. They just need a happy Mum so don’t be afraid to put your feelings and wants/needs first. I’ve finally reached that point and we are hoping to move back to the UK soon.

Just out of curiosity, what suburb of Perth are you in? 

I feel like you completely get this/me!! Thank god. I feel like such an ungrateful fool for being this way. 
I am living in Carramar NOR. What about you?

Thank you for all your replies and concerns. I have been to speak to a GP and I am getting counselling. It’s just not what I expected - we came to Oz for a happier, healthier life but if anything I’ve never been more unhappy. I’m sure there is an element of PTSD although I feel it would be unfair to say this as when I think of PTSD, I think of war heroes, not silly whingers like me. Moving during covid with 2 small children was incredibly tough. As I was the main driver in it all, I do carry a lot of guilt for the heart of my family in the UK who miss my girls so much. And not having the family support here with my Dad and his partner that we thought we would, is like a double blow. I guess my question is, how long do I wait before I think about moving back? I wouldn’t consider it for at least another year given the state of UK with covid etc. But how long should I allow myself to feel this way? And has anyone gone back to UK and was actually really happy??

Hi! So we (me, husband and two girls 5 and 1) moved to Perth last year during the height of Covid. It was very stressful, but we were so grateful to be able to get out of the UK and live normal lives here. Moving to Australia had been everything I wanted and worked so hard for. I wanted a better life for myself and my family. My Dad and brother live here and I had been out to visit a few times and loved it. I kept thinking this is the best place to raise a family. I know we'd miss family in UK but I had family here so thought it would be OK. Unfortunately, not long after our arrival there was a big family fall out. Although everyone is back on talking terms, nothing is like it once was. My girls are very happy here, especially my eldest. Both my husband and I have good jobs and earn good money. But for some reason, I am miserable!! I cannot seem to settle or make many friends. I miss my family back home so very much. I now suffer from the worst anxiety and I don't know what to do. I was the complete driving force behind the move here and now I regret it so much. I just don't know what to do. I am very close with my Mum and inlaws and I know they are missing the girls terribly. But they were also so supportive in our move here. 

Did anyone else struggle when they arrived in Oz and how long did it last for? or did anyone go back to the UK and was actually really happy with their choice??