Alice123456

On 25/05/2019 at 21:08, Breathe said:

Hey Alice123456, 

It sounds like you're really feeling the tension of the visa process, I'm sorry to hear how different your experience has been to your expectations and best efforts to accelerate the reunion between you and your partner. Thank you for hanging in there and doing challenging care work when your heart also seems to be with your partner.  I would say from some people's point of view, you would be considered fortunate that your partner is from a country not identified as high risk, which reduces some of the barriers and makes him less likely to be seen as getting immigrant stigma so not to worry about the election results. Your local MP being willing to help is a good sign too. You've pulled through this far, hang in there

I know you say it's not possible to go overseas due to family commitments, but could you maybe visit for a short break of 1.5 - 2 weeks or could Ben get a visit visa here? Could someone arrange respite for your dad or if you have other siblings or a reliable cousin even help out for a bit with your mum and dad so that you can get a break and feel refreshed and reminded of why you're tackling this journey, at the same time as strengthening your application? Self care is at least as important as care for others, and not too selfish at all It sounds like you're in capable hands with the agent support, and although it can be a financially taxing process I'm glad we can afford to go through it. I have come across people who can't afford to sponsor family due to visa costs and I feel we are in an infinitely more fortunate situation as a result! And if you review other forums, people are still getting visas even after the election, sometimes when they were on the verge of giving up too so you're not alone, and this is going somewhere. It's great to hear you are getting follow up from your case officer, even if you find it frustrating, it seems to be heading in a good direction. You can do this. 

When I got a visa refusal for my partner (in all fairness there was a complication in our case but we disagree with the conclusion), it was quite devastating, especially after such an anxious wait beforehand. I was pretty wracked with anxiety in the lead up to that and over the whole process, in hindsight I would have tried to ensure my partner and I were a little more equipped so that we didn't make a foreseeable mistake at interview. After that point of getting a refusal I felt that at least being in a visa processing queue is a better position, to be in a timeline system. However, it taught me that even in what feels like a limbo situation, life goes on. The fact that you and your partner are committed to see this process through is a sign you can handle this. People's lives are unpredictable, even with the best of plans we can't always anticipate the good and bad that lies ahead. If your love and commitment is strong as it seems to be, you will survive this, and your relationship will be stronger for it. We live in a globalised world, a long distance relationship is equally valid as any other relationship. There is ease knowing this is just for the short term, not forever. This might be the toughest thing you've had to do in your life so far, but though I don't know you personally from how you describe your selflessness with your family and pragmatic decision making in your efforts to streamline the visa process, you are 100% tougher and wiser for it It seems that visa processing times are getting longer and longer, but you are still within anticipated guidelines, so hold faith because the end is still in sight. I hope you and your partner are permanently reunited soon with your partner's visa grant. 

And for myself, we are preparing for an appeal which we have no idea when it will be as yet (with longer average times than visa processing so deja vu/ round 2) yet somehow I am a little more at ease, acknowledging that so much of our lives is outside of our control, but that can be a source of blessing along the way too. My partner and I have found that through uncertainty and the distress of this process, we have had to become better communicators, more empathetic, more patient and compare ourselves less to the people around us, which has ultimately improved our quality of life, even if we miss each other deeply. Hugs in long distance feel so much more uplifting and powerful, there is so much that becomes old for others that feels fresh again for us when we meet again. And no matter how our journey looks, we'll know we'll be reunited when the time is right and best for us, In sha Allah khairan (God Almighty willing). As much as possible, I find it helps to match up your routines, even if you're in different timezones etc, such as a regular time to Skype/ WhatsApp/Viber if you don't already, maybe sometimes sharing meals over the net or watching a movie in different places together or things that give you a sense of normality in what otherwise feels like chaos. And I find even as it can get excruciatingly painful, at some point your body learns to adapt to help you cope, and things get easier, even if it doesn't feel like that right now. 

You have survived the toughest tests you have ever faced, and you will survive this too. Your anchor is the certainty of your love and commitment, everything else will fall into place at the right time for you both, regardless of the timelines of others. You've got this

 

 

Thank you so much. Thanks for taking the time to write such a comprehensive, caring and encouraging email.  I hope you are successful too!

Thank you to everyone again.  Its so nice that total strangers are willing to respond.

Last I heard our application was actively being processed but I don't know what that really means.

I am lucky that Ben is British but really it hasn't helped our case.  I can't really go and see Ben, he is heading to Norway now for work and I am also studying and trying to save money.  Also to be honest Ben said he needed a break from the visa or hearing about it as it has caused him so much stress.

Thanks to everyone

Hello,

My partner is British.  We met whilst he was in Australia on a working holiday when we lived and worked together as outdoor guides.  We applied for a de facto partner visa on his second working visa.  We heard it would be quicker if he applied off shore and so we did.

We applied on 28 February 2018.  That was over 14 months ago.

He was asked for a Chinese Police check for the time that he worked in China 6 years ago but we could not provide this as he was on an M business class visa which makes in not legible for a Chinese police check. We had to pay $400.00 for a letter explaining that.  After some time the Australian visa office wrote to us and said they accept that under the law he was not legible for a Chinese Police check and instead asked him to provide proof of his 'temporary residence' from when he registered with a police station in China when he got there 6 years ago. 

He was only working there for a couple of years but we contacted the same agent and they said even if my partner had both his passports (as he lost one whilst over there), and turned up in china they simply would not issue him with this document from so long ago.

So I uploaded that document to immi account as proof.  Then we filled out the form 80 which was very difficult as Ben has pretty much spent the last ten years as a lot of young British men do, traveling around the world.  We almost had to write 3 pages especially with all the visa runs he had to do.

I have been to meeting with my local MP's constituent and he has been trying to help me but he can't say much other than the guy he spoke to said there were a lot of documents attached to the visa application.

I can't leave Australia as my dad has MS and I need to help my mum. 

However when my partner called the visa people they said it could be another 5 months and he wasn't sure he could take it anymore, not knowing when we would see each other, not being able to plan ahead. 

I am stuck in never never limbo land and its hurting the one thing we have been fighting for, and that is us.  We love each other so much but when you don't even have a vague idea of when the visa will come through or even if it will how to you go on?

Has anyone had a visa approved lately?  Or are they being suspended because of elections.

I don't know why i'm writing, mainly because i'm really so bloody sad and I hope someone can say something, that will send in the tiniest crack of light.

Thanks to everyone who responded.

I appreciate it

My partner and I applied for him (he's British) to come and be with me on a 309 visa.  We applied and paid on the 28th of February 2018.

So we are still within the processing time and I get that.  However, being apart has caused a huge strain on our relationship.  We had to fill in this form 80 form and as my partner has spent the past 10 years traveling it was so difficult to fill in the form and was really really very stressful as he has been to so many countries.

Someone told me the form 80 is usually one of the last things that they ask for.

Has anyone found this to be the case.  So they submit the form 80 and then their visa was approved?

Do you think someones extensive travel could count against them?

Its all very challenging.  I just want it to be over before our relationship challenged to the point of no return.  I can't leave as my dad is unwell and I did get a letter from my local MP asking if there was a way the visa could be expedited.

But long story short, form 80 a good sign?  If so how long?

Thanks in advance