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kittylover

It's been too long

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Hey there,

I'm a 42 year old black female, and my husband and I left S.E London last November. I am still in a position where I am finding it increasingly difficult to meet lady types to go for coffee, ice cream, a walk in the park, shopping etc and just to hang out with. I am currently 26 weeks pregnant, am able to move around quite well and am relatively active. I use public transport to get around and live approximately 20 minutes from the CBD, just up he road from Brunswick.

I am hoping to meet ladies who are looking for friendship as I have spent way too much time being a "domestic godess" at the weekends when I can be doing "ladies things".

 

Hope to hear from you :smile:.

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Sorry to hear you have not met anyone, although not really surprised as you are living in singles and no kids land where probably both parties are at work. There will be people with children but they are probably in child care.

 

The people who have families tend to live further out of the city area as Australians like to have a good plot of land once they have children.

 

Have a look at the council's home page there should be a community house around where you can go as they usually have friendship groups, also baby groups.

 

http://www.kidspot.com.au/ is one of the parenting forums around that you could join and meet people from your area on line first.

 

Good luck.


Petals

:ssign15:taking no prisoners :wink:

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Probably after you have your baby you will meet quite a few people through the mothers' groups the clinic sisters introduce you to. Do you go to any pre natal classes? That is another place to possibly meet people. Maybe you could google for groups near you?

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Guest

Hello and welcome. Am not able to help with regard to the area you are living or meet ups or anything as am in the UK. Just didn't want to read and run.

 

Both replies above have some good ideas/points. My experience of an Aussie city CBD is that not so many families live in them and they tend to be further out in the suburbs. Defo see if you can find some pre natal groups to pop along to. And hopefully others from here will be able to offer suggestions or arrange to meet up sometime.

 

And of course, if you want to chat or discuss anything the forum is usually a good place to pass a bit of time. I'm happy to talk baby stuff (am not far off your age and have a 3 year old and we are trying for another) and so won't mind a bit if you ever want to natter about that, drop me a PM). I remember when I was pregnant with my son, we were living rural in England and it was very isolating not being able to drive or get about easily those early weeks once he arrived.

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Guest MM2Melb
Hey there,

I'm a 42 year old black female, and my husband and I left S.E London last November. I am still in a position where I am finding it increasingly difficult to meet lady types to go for coffee, ice cream, a walk in the park, shopping etc and just to hang out with. I am currently 26 weeks pregnant, am able to move around quite well and am relatively active. I use public transport to get around and live approximately 20 minutes from the CBD, just up he road from Brunswick.

I am hoping to meet ladies who are looking for friendship as I have spent way too much time being a "domestic godess" at the weekends when I can be doing "ladies things".

 

Hope to hear from you :smile:.

 

Hello,

Hope your pregnancy is going well. I am just a few weeks behind you (22 weeks). We are moving to Melbourne around Christmas, probably/possibly going to be just up the road from you in Carlton area. I think you will find there are some new mums/women getting to the start of maternity leave in your area even if not so many as in outer suburbs. Was looking for something else but saw this prenatal yoga class in Brunswick - http://www.wiseworld.com.au/calendar/14regular.htm (is there among lots of quite hippy offerings but even if you are not too hippy could still be fun.... I have been going to one here and it is lovely, finishes every week with open chat, cups of tea and endless huge chocolate biscuits - my favourite part of the class :wink:

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Guest doc4

hey kittlover; i'm sorry to hear of your difficulty meeting new people and making friends, my wife had much the same issues when we arrived 7 yrs ago. her strategy eventually, and its not for everyone, was to invite work colleagues and ladies she would talk with at parties etc out for coffee or a shopping day. some of these 'dates' worked and she remains friends with them today, some she just plainly didn't get along with and had no further contact. its a bold move and its akin to a something of a car salesman but you've got to be prepared for knockbacks and failures 9 out of ten times with this and not get delfated by the process.

 

she also started taking some art classes in mosaics and flower arranging and started french classes, these are all things she has previously held an interest in but never pursued in her former UK life so if nothing in the freidnship sense came of it she would still get value and enjoyment out of the classes; i think she saw it as an investment in herself. she also found these classes disarm the friendship circles as most people go there out of individual interest rather than in clicks of friends; its a much easier way of getting to talk with someone without the desperation of needing friends.

 

I'm not sure if what I've posted helps at all, but don't feel like you're alone in the way you're feeling. Finding new friends is not easy for anyone and it takes time to build those bonds as it is normally an organic process as we grow rather than an artifically created strategy.

 

good luck

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Hi Kittylover, while there are lots of families in the outer suburbs there are lots of us in the inner city too. We've forgone the plot of land and squeezed ourselves into terraces and flats in order to live where we feel comfortable. It would have been quite a shock to go from SE London to the Melbourne 'burbs so you've made a good call.

 

I've only been in Mel since Feb but have made some friends though my 5 year old daughter. Kids are definitely the connection to your local community so things will improve for you. I'd be happy to catch up sometime and I've lived and worked in SE London so we may have some common ground. Shoot me a PM and we'll sort something out.

 

It'll get better!

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Hey there I hope this message finds you well.

I'm not doing too badly, apart from the tiredness and the sporadic feelings of being bloated (and slight pangs of missing peeps to hang with) but hey, it's all good.

Thank you very much for the message, I was blown away that someone had replied :biggrin: . Although hubby and I have been here nearly a year, I have a friend who lives in country Victoria and I have been visiting her for the past ten years so the transition wasn't too much of a shock but I still miss "good old "sarf London". Still doesn't feel as if I live here though despite the fact I work, very odd feeling.

 

I used to live in Kennington just down the road from Waterloo train station and Heffalump and Castle and my favourite haunts were Lower Marsh, Brixton market and Walworth Road. I used to go to Lewisham a fair bit as I have family there.

 

Are you enjoying being here? Any regrets? If the opportunity arose, would you go back to the UK? That would be a tough call. I was chatting t a lady the other day in the canteen at work who was passing through, and she used to live in Hackney and came over when she was 16 years old. NEVER been back to the UK!!!!! She's in her late forties and she said she never had the inclination to go back. If I went now feeling the way I do, I probably wouldn't come back.....

 

Please drop me a line when you can, it would be great to chat to ya :smile:.

 

Take care.

 

Kittylover

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Hey starlight 7 I hope this email finds you well and thank you for the message.

I'm orf to the hospital on Friday (Nov 11) and hopefully they can point me in the right direction regarding pre natal classes, I haven't a scooby when I should be going and if they find the classes or if I do. This is all very daunting stuff for an old bird.

How are things with you?

 

Take care

 

Kittylover

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Hey there MM2Melb I hope this message finds you well.

I am now 28 weeks and doing ok apart from the tiredness and feelings of being bloated. I'll check out that website, it'll be a train ride for me and it sounds like fun. I have a belly dancing dvd which I have been doing for a few weeks which is good fun and I'm waiting for a Bollywood work out dvd to arrive, all of which I used to do in the UK. I would like to practice my moves in a nice wee bar or club somewhere now.

 

I am going to leave work next month so looking at super cheap things to amuse myself with. How's your pregnancy going? I hope it's going well and you are feel full of energy and bouncing about like a young gazelle. I have my monthly hospital appointment on Friday as I have a few gynae issues going on which has made this pregnancy a wee bit of a rough ride but all in all, it has been, so far a very interesting experience. Not long to go now and the months are flying past, do you feel the same? It's all very daunting as this is unknown territory for me, ooooh!

 

Anyway I must fly. Please do drop me a line when you can.

 

Adios.

 

Kittylover

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Hey Doc4 thank you for the message.

 

I have an interest in both French and Italian and can speak fairly well although I do stutter my way around both languages but it is something I really enjoy and have always had an interest in. I, if my budget will allow it, will attempt to go to find some classes in my local area. Thank you for the advice.

 

Molte grazie signore.

 

Kittylover

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Hey snifter I hope this email finds you well.

Thank you for the message, it did put a wee smile on me face. Hubby and I are city dwellers as we used to live in practically the same set up as now, twenty minutes or so out of the city centre. Any further out and we'll get nose bleeds, minimum travel for us!!!!!

I'm happy to touch base with you for chats, good for the soul as I spend way too much alone as hubby works shifts so it'll keep me occupied for a wee while.

 

I hope all is going well with you and yours back in Blighty. I loved being out of London and visiting family and friends in Surrey, Sunderland, Coventry, Preston and Yorkshire but the quietness used to unnerve me somewhat, I'm used to noise, filth and pollution all of which I find comforting. Rural life in the UK appealed to me but I knew I could never be happy in that scenario. I'm a city bird.

No bonfire night and no kids knocking of the door begging for sweets on "Halloween", that was very odd for me.

Anyway I must dash, need to get myself ready for the week's work ahead. I hope the weather isn't too bad over there. Heard about the pile up on the M5, that's terrible news.

 

Take care

 

Kittylover

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Hey petals, I hope this email finds you well.

 

You're probably right about the suburbs thing, but we are indeed city dwellers and like to have at least a short trip from the city. Even when we lived in London we were about a 15 minute bus ride away from the West Ends which was great, near enough to get but far enough away. The area where we are have fairly big back yards so mini me can have a we bit of space to run around in but obviously not as big as if we were living further out. I'll check that out, great tip.

 

Thank you and please drop me a line when you can.

 

Kittylover

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