Leaving because of racism experience

[Iron Chef]

As a born and bred Aussie, I genuinely cringe at some of the things people say here, but I've also had the benefit of travelling overseas regularly and living overseas too. There are some exceptionally ignorant people here who know no different to their experience of life in their own suburb.

 

Because of its relatively remote location, Perth (and Adelaide to a lesser extent) hasn't had the same influx of migrants as say Sydney or Melbourne. Aside from Aboriginal people (which are less than 2% of the population), we are a nation of people who've arrived here from other countries, all desperate to hold on to their own cultural identities when they've arrived.

 

In Adelaide, for example, you'll see Irish clubs and Italian clubs and Greek clubs etc etc - various nationalities trying to preserve aspects of life from 'the old country'. One unusual result of this is that Italians come here and are amazed to find Italian restaurants serving dishes that haven't been served in Italy itself for 50 years - Italy itself has moved on, but those who moved to Australia desperately sought to hold on to their traditions. My 15 year old nephew is seeing a girl of Greek background behind her parents' backs because they only want her to have a Greek boyfriend! And her parents were born in Australia!

 

Rightly or wrongly, we've also held on to the stereotypes of nationalities from 50 years ago too. Italians are all hot-tempered, French are aloof and snobby, Germans (my heritage) have no sense of humour, Poms are whingers etc etc. Some cultures here have even embraced these stereotypes to their advantage - the term "wog" once a racial slur here, has lost its sting because the "wogs" themselves started using it to describe each other. We are a nation of many cultures, and yet we never really originally had an identity of our own - when people ask where you're from, it's because we're used to naming other countries as a reflection of our identity.

 

Oddly enough, I spent all my time growing up with the Italian community in Port Pirie, and I got the nickname of either "dogger" or "skippy" because I was the only "Aussie" that regularly spent time in the Italian clubs rather than hanging out at the Aussie Rules football clubs.

 

My point is that people who spend enough time with others from a variety of backgrounds are intelligent enough to recognise that these stereotypes never really ring true - there ARE German people with good senses of humour, for example! The problem is that those who never come in contact with other cultures only go on what they've heard from older family members. Our crap media in Australia also does its best to reinforce the ignorance at times too.

 

I hope this goes some way to explaining some of the comments you've experienced - racism must always be judged by the way it affects the person on the receiving end (which makes it no different to misogyny or religious intolerance in that regard), but please also remember that some remarks made towards you and your kids were never intended to offend - I'm sure if some of the people who made the remarks could read what you've written they'd be horrified that they had offended you.

 

If anyone has read this far, take the time to watch the program in the link below, especially the journey of Raquel from beginning to end, as her attitudes and background apply to a surprisingly high number of Aussies. Proof that compassion, experience and education will always overcome ignorance and racism

 

http://www.sbs.com.au/shows/goback/episodes/page/i/1/h/Episodes/

[VictoriaP]

Hey, it's such a shame that a few small minded people are making life miserable for you in Perth.

 

We are a British mixed raced family (my OH parents are from the West Indies) and we've been living in Melbourne for 16 months. To be honest, Melbourne is the only Australian city that we would consider as it it very multicultural. We get stared at a bit and the girls get frustrated with the constant questions about their hair, but generally we like it here.

 

I agree that some people are very direct and it takes a bit of getting use to, but I refuse to let people who's family or themselves were once immigrants too, make me feel like we shouldn't be here. Like a lot of things here, the attitude of some are a good 20 years behind the UK. If you like the Australian life but not Perth, I'd definitely think about trying Melbourne if you can.

 

Best of luck whatever you decide.

x

[RockDr]

We are a British mixed raced family (my OH parents are from the West Indies) and we've been living in Melbourne for 16 months. To be honest, Melbourne is the only Australian city that we would consider as it it very multicultural.

 

Interesting, I've never been to Melbourne, so can't really comment, but was walking down the mall in Adelaide a few months ago with my friend who was over from the UK, and she commented on how many different cultures were also walking down the mall, that in Melbourne where she'd just spent a couple of days touristing, she'd felt like she stuck out like a sore thumb as the only non-white (she's olive skinned, wears hijab), but she felt right at home in Adelaide.

[Rudi]

As a mixed race family our experience of Perth is not what we expected. Hubby is white British and I am black (professional with great career from UK and a masters degree...you'll see why I say that later!) Daughter 8 and son 6. Here goes and excuse typos: Perth is a nice place and the kids love the outdoor life but it is not really for us as a family and we are actually going back to UK at the end of the year after 2 years here. The kids get bullied at school coz of their colour (and they are in private school have a friend with similar issues and hers is in a public school) We've found out that a lot of people here are ignorant when it comes to interacial marriage. (we live North of the River)

 

I am quite shock how some people are stuck in a "time machine". My daughter has been told she has colour like poo. She's been called frizzy (hair texture), freak (apparently some people call the mixed aboriginal freaks so my daughter was called a freak at a public swimming pool). My son has been shoved at the swimming pool and being called "you black boy" and have his trousers pulled down at school! Disgusting! ...called "you poor black Indian" (oh he doesn't look Asian at all...lol) I am not a racist person and was not brought up to hate any race and I simply hate it the way they treat some people here. It really hurt us when our children are affected. I just cannot understand why mention colour of skin when it comes to people! My sister and I went to visit a Show Home, because she is is building a new house she wanted to get some ideas about interior design etc...A man heard us speaking creole (our native language as I am from Seychelles) and asked us where we were from. My sister said Seychelles and his respond was "I did not know that people from Seychelles were as black as you...I thought you were from Sudan or somewhere like that"...My jaw dropped and I was speechless...I just walked straight out. One day My husband took the kids to the Underwater Aquarium and a guy came up to him and said "are these two coloured kids with you...there is some black woman outside who's looking for her kids" Hubby turned bright red and didn't even answer (He said he wanted to punch him!) but my son asked why did the man called me coloured? I am not coloured...what does he mean by coloured daddy?. This man could have just Said "are these kids with you because there is a woman outside who is looking for her two kids" . And there is this woman who was talking to my husband and asked him if he has kids. Hubby said yes and showed her a photo of the kids in his wallet...her respond " Oh..they are quite dark...what colour is their mum"....Or a 16 year old boy in his class(Hubby is a teacher) who met him at the doctor's with our son and asked "Is he your son? and H said yes and his next question was why is he black? the list of incidents is endless! H and I laughed about it when the kids are not around because we find it hilarious that some people can be so so backward!. Each time H goes somewhere with the kids he gets asked lots of silly questions and as a family we get stare at a lot (it is very uncomfortable...now I don't like going out with hubby and kids). we have had enough and the kids cry a lot and want to go back to England because they hate school and don't have friends. In 1.5 years my son has been invited to one birthday party and almost every weekend he cries because invitation for a birthday party has been handed out and he never gets one. I have taken them out of school. They are being home schooled until we leave.

 

I said I am professional because when I was looking for a job, Hubby asked around, mostly people who have seen me with him and met briefly. The answers he got was Oh...there are are lot of cleaning jobs going. No disrespect to cleaners but they did not even asked for my background...just because I am black they assume I am only good for cleaning jobs...I have a first class degree, A masters degree and extensive work experience in Media, broadcasting and PR.

 

We came on a student visa because Hubby did a GTP in UK and it is not recognised as a teaching qualification here so he had to do the Grad dip in Education although he he taught for 7 years in UK and 2 years at an international school in Seychelles.When we left Uk I was the only one who did a medical test because I have a seychellois passport...(according to Oz immigartion I am a health risk...Oh by the way I lived in UK for 10 years!) In March we renewed the visa to graduate one and to see how things go before apply for the PR...I had to do to a medical test again because I come from a "high risk country". I do not know what that means because Seychelles do not have any high risk disease and babies are vaccinated there! when Hubby called them and told them that I have been in UK for 10 years, I did a medical before I left UK and have not left Australia in the last year and surely I don't need to do another one. And if I had something contagious the whole family would have contracted it by now...Their answer was " All we know is that she has a Seychellois passport not a British one" When I was in UK Hubby nagged me to get a British passport but I did not see why I should because my Seychellois passport in UK did not not hindered me in any way. Until I get an Australian passport or a Bristish one I will always be treated differently in OZ.

 

We were much happier as a family in UK and I hate the small/narrow minded attitude of people here. Sorry it's a long post but I just wanted to share our experience. Like I've said the list of incidents is a long one. We're leaving Australia because we feel that we do not belong. In UK my kids were never picked on because of being mixed race and I was certainly not discriminated against because of my passport. I have permanent residency in UK and was treated fairly when I went for job interviews etc...I married my husband for love not for a British passport. We thought we were bringing our kids here for a better life but at the moment we do not feel that way. We are aware there are racist pockets everywhere but feel that here in Oz you are either black or white ...mixed is a problem they don't know where to place you. We might have just been unlucky to be treated that way...but I know people who feel the same way too here. Its been an experience and I would encourage anyone to give it a try.

 

Sorry to hear of your experiences - certainly not a nice feeling.

 

It's not the same everywhere though. Where I live I have not found people racist particularly. One of my very good friends is Gambian by birth and her husband is Caucasian British. Their children are / have been at our local school for many years - it's a private school. Their middle son was head boy last year and very liked and respected amongst his piers. Their daughter is in my daughter's year and is popular and well liked.

 

OK - you can say I don't really know what it's like watching this family from the outside, and no, I don't......BUT.....my youngest daughter is Asian. The rest of us - myself, my husband and 2 other daughter's are Caucasian. Yes, people stare, yes, sometimes people ask if my daughter is my daughter, yes, sometimes children who don't know us, look confused and ask why she is "brown". It's just normal curiosity. I don't find it offensive, and I think my reaction means that she doesn't either. Outside school yesterday my daughter ran over with a girl from a couple of grades higher. They were playing near the car and the girl looked at me and asked my daughter if I was her mum. My daughter sensed her confusion and just easily answered "yes, and yes, I am adopted" The girl put her arms around her. It was really very sweet, and a learning thing for the girl. No one was offended or felt awkward by it.

 

Once or twice there have been minor incidents at school - but for me it's only similar to nasty teasing like someone calling someone "4 eyes", it's just kids - and lest face it, some kids are pretty nasty little horrors!!!

 

Maybe we have been lucky.

 

I wish you well back in the UK

 

Love

 

Rudi

x

[JoandJon]

I've been the subject of some pretty nasty comments in the UK - ok they were nationalist rather than racist (for my sins I'm a white-skinned Aussie expat) but they really hurt.

 

It was the first time I'd ever encountered such a thing and I think the worst thing was - it was from a couple of my colleagues! (A bunch of professional scientists) I must point out it was only from 2 of them, most others were totally offended on my behalf. Mind you, that's what they said afterward - noone jumped up to my defense at the time.

 

The other weird thing was a taxi driver who told me I was Irish, and wouldn't believe me when I said I was an Aussie, 10 minutes of him asking what part of Ireland I was from - surreal.

 

And VictoriaP - I hope Melbourne's treating you right, I think people generally often stare unintentionally when they're trying to figure out where people are from.

[RockDr]

And VictoriaP - I hope Melbourne's treating you right, I think people generally often stare unintentionally when they're trying to figure out where people are from.

 

I've been known to stare unintentionally at people. Nothing to do with race, generally I'm just admiring the person's hair, or the cut/fabric/beading/needlework of whatever the person's wearing. It'll get me into trouble one of these days...

[moirclan]

sorry to hear about your experiences [ not good [ i would speak to the school im sure they would do some thing about it ,australians are direct when i first got here some one said to me gooday you old ba@#$ard i i was twenty i was told it was a term of endearment , so i used it on them the whole night , they got the message !!! , a lot will ask you where your from i do it my self , im just really intrested i love hearing about other countries , no offence is meant , my family are from the west midlands although im a shropshire grl ive been asked if im romanion !@#aas i told them " it ay mi fault yow car spake proper inglish !!!" shuts them up lol, you give as good as you get and they love you for it , and you will have friends for life .

as for the children being bullied its a terrible thing my kids had the same problem it broke my heart , and my kids are aussies when we lived in singapore we were classed as hicksville by the people from sydney and melbourne , they would try to be clever and ask where were we from again? id say WA you know that big chunk of realestate on the left of australia the state that brings in all the money and keep you other states going " ,[it shut them up lol]i nwouldnt like to go through primary school again with the stuff my kids went through , but it was the same in the uk growing up i had auburn hair and god did i suffer for it , ginger nut wasnt a biscuit them it was an obsenity !!

but then you see signs of generalisation on here " i need to dumb down my resume for australia [ we are not all thick here you know , ".they are all boguns , [ why because some dont wear shoes in the summer or are dressed for comfort rather than the latest fashion , < oh no you dont want to live there its full of homeswest , [ lots of us grew up in council houses and we all turned out ok , well some of us did any way !!lol ,ausralias education is lacking , i think the level of education is good , far better than i received , it depends on the child i think the education is available to them it depends on if they want to learn , i see these kind of comments on this site all the while what would you call it ? uneducated poms ? racism ? generalisation , ? offensive ??very few bat an eye lid some mention how its not good , but we all seem to except it ,

when my grandmother met my hubby [ hes an aussie ] she said well hes been hit with a tar brush some way back , god i nearly died i hoped he wouldnt under stand what it meant , but my grandmother , just hadnt been exposed to different cultures , when my oldest girl was born , the italians all thought she was italian the slavs all thought she was slav and in her teen age years the lebanese thought she was from lebanon and called her sister , she gets asked if she is from egypt , in singapore they all thought she eurasion , as i told her we have covered every country except northern europe !!lol they are not being offensive they are just curious , ever body in the world looks more like her mother than me !!!

[Guest guest57588]

As a born and bred Aussie, I genuinely cringe at some of the things people say here, but I've also had the benefit of travelling overseas regularly and living overseas too. There are some exceptionally ignorant people here who know no different to their experience of life in their own suburb.

 

Because of its relatively remote location, Perth (and Adelaide to a lesser extent) hasn't had the same influx of migrants as say Sydney or Melbourne. Aside from Aboriginal people (which are less than 2% of the population), we are a nation of people who've arrived here from other countries, all desperate to hold on to their own cultural identities when they've arrived.

 

In Adelaide, for example, you'll see Irish clubs and Italian clubs and Greek clubs etc etc - various nationalities trying to preserve aspects of life from 'the old country'. One unusual result of this is that Italians come here and are amazed to find Italian restaurants serving dishes that haven't been served in Italy itself for 50 years - Italy itself has moved on, but those who moved to Australia desperately sought to hold on to their traditions. My 15 year old nephew is seeing a girl of Greek background behind her parents' backs because they only want her to have a Greek boyfriend! And her parents were born in Australia!

 

Rightly or wrongly, we've also held on to the stereotypes of nationalities from 50 years ago too. Italians are all hot-tempered, French are aloof and snobby, Germans (my heritage) have no sense of humour, Poms are whingers etc etc. Some cultures here have even embraced these stereotypes to their advantage - the term "wog" once a racial slur here, has lost its sting because the "wogs" themselves started using it to describe each other. We are a nation of many cultures, and yet we never really originally had an identity of our own - when people ask where you're from, it's because we're used to naming other countries as a reflection of our identity.

 

Oddly enough, I spent all my time growing up with the Italian community in Port Pirie, and I got the nickname of either "dogger" or "skippy" because I was the only "Aussie" that regularly spent time in the Italian clubs rather than hanging out at the Aussie Rules football clubs.

 

My point is that people who spend enough time with others from a variety of backgrounds are intelligent enough to recognise that these stereotypes never really ring true - there ARE German people with good senses of humour, for example! The problem is that those who never come in contact with other cultures only go on what they've heard from older family members. Our crap media in Australia also does its best to reinforce the ignorance at times too.

 

I hope this goes some way to explaining some of the comments you've experienced - racism must always be judged by the way it affects the person on the receiving end (which makes it no different to misogyny or religious intolerance in that regard), but please also remember that some remarks made towards you and your kids were never intended to offend - I'm sure if some of the people who made the remarks could read what you've written they'd be horrified that they had offended you.

 

If anyone has read this far, take the time to watch the program in the link below, especially the journey of Raquel from beginning to end, as her attitudes and background apply to a surprisingly high number of Aussies. Proof that compassion, experience and education will always overcome ignorance and racism

 

http://www.sbs.com.au/shows/goback/episodes/page/i/1/h/Episodes/

 

 

Terrific post Iron Chef, very thought-provoking.

[Guest Been there]

We used to travel to pirie for football and swimming carnivals, biggest football ground I've ever seen. Went to school in Woomera.

[Guest MADTOM]

My little girl came back from her first day at nursery the other day - I asked if her teachers were nice and she repled one had a black face (she is only 3) I am olive skinned where as she is not. I explained that everyone was different, different colours, different sizes, hair colour etc and that, that was good. She nodded.

 

If I could banish one thing in the world it would be prejudice (of any description) there is no need for any one group of people to feel superior to others. We are all people and we all turn to dust!

 

Why in 2011 are people still making assumptions based on appearances, why are they so fixated on someones colour or creed, why do people seem surprised to see a black person in the street unfortunately I can't see an end to ignorance or stupidity but if every parent can teach their kids respect maybe in time prejudice will be only a minor problem.

[Petals]

I've been known to stare unintentionally at people. Nothing to do with race, generally I'm just admiring the person's hair, or the cut/fabric/beading/needlework of whatever the person's wearing. It'll get me into trouble one of these days...

 

So have I and its because they are often so good looking :laugh:

[Guest jininiel]

My little girl came back from her first day at nursery the other day - I asked if her teachers were nice and she repled one had a black face (she is only 3) I am olive skinned where as she is not. I explained that everyone was different, different colours, different sizes, hair colour etc and that, that was good. She nodded.

 

If I could banish one thing in the world it would be prejudice (of any description) there is no need for any one group of people to feel superior to others. We are all people and we all turn to dust!

 

Why in 2011 are people still making assumptions based on appearances, why are they so fixated on someones colour or creed, why do people seem surprised to see a black person in the street unfortunately I can't see an end to ignorance or stupidity but if every parent can teach their kids respect maybe in time prejudice will be only a minor problem.

 

MADTOM I totally agree with you. We have to educate our children. My daughter is in year 4 so the kids there are 9/10 years old and I do not think it is acceptable when a ten year old ask her questions like "why did your dad married a black woman?" luckily she is smart enough to answer "why not?" or calling her "one of those freaks"...obviously being different makes her a freak and where did those kids get these mentality? Or a 7 year old telling my son to go away because he is black... We are a well travelled family, we make the point of taking our kids to different places from Europe to Asia to Africa because we want them to learn about other cultures.

My point is we never felt like we do not belong in UK...we did get the odd stares but here it is constant reminder that we are not the "norm". Hubby and I are comfortable about who we are...he calls me his Cocoa woman, when people ask how he likes his coffee he'll say I like all things black! My parents used to call me Golliwog because when I was growing up I had this massive afro hair, I'll say things like "you whities are soft" to my husband etc... My daughter do not mind when the girls touches her hair (she gets it all the time) so we do embrace who we are and I don't like it when people stereotype you and I am sorry to say it is very in your face here in Australia! I do not think it is cool when someone call me "some black woman"...or tell me "there lots of black and Asian women who are cleaners why can't you".. Like the saying goes: Education begins at home...If we as Parents do not educate the kids then these sort of attitude will continue in our socities and people will keep kidding themselves that it is not intentional. we are going back simply because we were happy there, we wanted to try somewhere new and we chose WA because we have family here.

[Guest gypsy6]

Hi there,

i read your post and cried because that could easily have been us. Our family composition is exactly like yours but we were fortunate enough to have chosen Melbourne(eastern) and our family has been made so welcome. Your first priority is your childrens safety physically and mentally and it seems you are already doing the right thing by removing them from that area. We are moving back to the UK(missing family etc) But will miss the friends we have met here. Yes there is racism everywhere but to be constantly reminded thats a big problem. Wishing you and your family all the best.

[sean and maureen]

Have sent you a pm

[Guest brummie39]

Hi Jininel...

your post is heartbreaking to read..

My son 9, when he started school, got picked on and still does about his "pommy" accent. My hubby is english im an aussie.. I rang the school and told them this making my son upset, what are going to about it.. there response was nothing..

As always we explain to him his background, and he loves being part aussie/english. It is up to us parents to renforce this and make them feel proud of who they are.. i tell our son he is loved and be proud of who you are..needles to say he is still called a "winger".. i just cant control what other ignorant parents teach their kids, i just confirm with our son how much we love who he is.. ( we live in melb, so it is every where)

Like your selves we are a well travelled family, and love to show our son different cultures, he loves these experiances, and a much broader mined young man then most kids here in his school.

We are moving back in 4 weeks ( yippie).. As an Australian my self, i feel i can say this... Yes some australians are a bit backwards in there thinking, and this due to lack of experiances in life and ignorant up bringing.. Please dont think all aussies are like this.. I love my country in some ways, but also know there is a wonderfull world out there..

Move back to your happy place, as we are, and enjoy life to the fullest.. All the best to you and your family..

[Paul1Perth]

This is indefensible, but I would like to add some comments.

 

As a child I was bullied a fair bit in Perth because I had a slight English accent. (I'd spent a year in the UK after moving over from Sydney). They tend to pick on anything that is different. This isn't acceptable and needs to be confronted and stopped. But it's a hard battle to fight as you are outnumber and there is no one on your side. The worse is the be littling when people say you are making a fuss about nothing.

 

The media have a lot to answer for. I can't remember the last time I saw a non white person reading the news, or even reporting. They way things are reported is a disgrace. They need some international overseeing. It's a pity Aust is not part of Europe. They could learn a lot.

 

Perth people don't know how to deal with black people. I was 30 before I saw my first black person. People in Perth don't understand pc. This doesn't make them all racist, many are just ignorant and insensitive.

 

The law needs to be used to stop this behaviour. People go on about political correctness and blah blah blah about how it is out of control. But PC stops this sort of behaviour. It tells people what is acceptable and what is not.

 

It is a shame you are leaving, as things won't improve unless people make a stand. But I can understand why. Best wishes.

 

Try watching SBS world news. You would be lucky to find a white person reading the news and reporting. Not that there's anything wrong with that, it's far and away the best news on TV.

 

It has my favourite newsreader, Lee-Lin Chin. She has her own look but always presents the news very professionally.

 

To the OP, I am sorry things turned out the way they have. I've noticed that Aussies are quite open about calling people black if they are, they don't feel the need to be politically correct on everything, which I find refreshing in a way. I know a couple of people who have moved over with the police, both mixed race marriages and they say they have felt less discriminated against here than they did in the UK.

 

I think it depends where you are from in the UK too. I heard John Cleese on the news last night saying that London is no longer an English city so being black, Indian, mixed race or whatever would probably fit in pretty well in London.

 

If you're English, moving back to the UK and looking for that little bit of England that you remember, London would probably be not the place for you.

[Paul1Perth]

My little girl came back from her first day at nursery the other day - I asked if her teachers were nice and she repled one had a black face (she is only 3) I am olive skinned where as she is not. I explained that everyone was different, different colours, different sizes, hair colour etc and that, that was good. She nodded.

 

If I could banish one thing in the world it would be prejudice (of any description) there is no need for any one group of people to feel superior to others. We are all people and we all turn to dust!

 

Why in 2011 are people still making assumptions based on appearances, why are they so fixated on someones colour or creed, why do people seem surprised to see a black person in the street unfortunately I can't see an end to ignorance or stupidity but if every parent can teach their kids respect maybe in time prejudice will be only a minor problem.

 

Your little girl meant no harm at all though, she was just stating a fact. She wasn't making an assumption that the person was bad or any different from anybody else because she had a black face.

 

If only all people had the openness of 3 year olds and people, of whatever colour, weren't so uptight and quick to take offense.

[Harpodom]

Look I am now an Australian citizen and I wanted to be I do not want to be a a pc Brit anymore. I am sure that a lot of people are just like me but that does not mean that we would be mean to rude to people. People who are mean and rude will be no matter what the law says.

 

I disagree with this idea that Australians are just blunt/non-pc, as if that is something to be proud of. My wife, a born and bred Aussie from a white working class Geelong family, never mentions race or colour. Sometimes I have to clarify who she is referring to. For example back when she was working in the NHS she'd be talking about a colleague that I've met, and me being me, I say something like, "is she the black lady?" or "is she the Japanese lady?" etc. The wife looks at me as if I'm a bit dense and says "what's that got to do with anything?" When I'm just trying to work out who it is! This is quite remarkable really if you meet some of my wife's cousins, uncles etc, who are some of the most racist people I've come across.

 

To the OP, it is truly terrible how you've been dealt with. It smacks of total ignorance but also of complete disregard for your and your children's dignity. Being white I've never faced racial discrimination, but I do have some insight (from having had a brother with Down's syndrome, passed away 2 years ago) of how people who are 'different' are treated. When I was young, people were sometimes be rude to the point of extreme cruelty to my brother. He lived for 45 years and in that time, attitudes to him changed beyond recognition. He went from being treated as a freak by some, to being a local icon: in the town where he lived, he was universally liked and known as one of the local characters, as he had a cheeky and engaging personality and was very eccentric!

 

What I'm trying to say is that everyone deserves respect and to be treated with dignity. The attitudes you have come across in Perth remind me of what my brother was up against 30 odd years ago. People need to grow out of labelling people by their skin colour. It clearly causes you offence to be continually 'reminded' of your colour. Australia is changing in this respect, but I think it's a few (decades) years behind the UK.

[Harpodom]

Your little girl meant no harm at all though, she was just stating a fact. She wasn't making an assumption that the person was bad or any different from anybody else because she had a black face.

 

If only all people had the openness of 3 year olds and people, of whatever colour, weren't so uptight and quick to take offense.

 

if only they didn't more like. It's called social conditioning: it's rude to stare, it's rude to single people out because they look/speak different.

That's because it makes the subject of this unwanted attention feel uncomfortable.

 

 

It sounds like you're saying the OP is being "uptight and quick to take offense".......?

[MARYROSE02]

Remember the attacks on Indian students in Vic & NSW? Everyone including India thought it was racist white Australians. Er No, it was racist Australians but NOT WASP ones!

[Guest guest37336]

I disagree with this idea that Australians are just blunt/non-pc, as if that is something to be proud of. My wife, a born and bred Aussie from a white working class Geelong family, never mentions race or colour. Sometimes I have to clarify who she is referring to. For example back when she was working in the NHS she'd be talking about a colleague that I've met, and me being me, I say something like, "is she the black lady?" or "is she the Japanese lady?" etc. The wife looks at me as if I'm a bit dense and says "what's that got to do with anything?" When I'm just trying to work out who it is! This is quite remarkable really if you meet some of my wife's cousins, uncles etc, who are some of the most racist people I've come across.

 

To the OP, it is truly terrible how you've been dealt with. It smacks of total ignorance but also of complete disregard for your and your children's dignity. Being white I've never faced racial discrimination, but I do have some insight (from having had a brother with Down's syndrome, passed away 2 years ago) of how people who are 'different' are treated. When I was young, people were sometimes be rude to the point of extreme cruelty to my brother. He lived for 45 years and in that time, attitudes to him changed beyond recognition. He went from being treated as a freak by some, to being a local icon: in the town where he lived, he was universally liked and known as one of the local characters, as he had a cheeky and engaging personality and was very eccentric!

 

What I'm trying to say is that everyone deserves respect and to be treated with dignity. The attitudes you have come across in Perth remind me of what my brother was up against 30 odd years ago. People need to grow out of labelling people by their skin colour. It clearly causes you offence to be continually 'reminded' of your colour. Australia is changing in this respect, but I think it's a few (decades) years behind the UK.

 

Agree mate. The good lady volunteers with loads of different people, and as you I will often try and define who she is talking about by mentioning a 'colour'. To me it is no different to asking if the person she is talking about is wearing glasses, has ginger hair, or has anything else that makes sense to me, as I am well and truly awful with names is all.

 

Cheers Tony.

[Harpodom]

Agree mate. The good lady volunteers with loads of different people, and as you I will often try and define who she is talking about by mentioning a 'colour'. To me it is no different to asking if the person she is talking about is wearing glasses, has ginger hair, or has anything else that makes sense to me, as I am well and truly awful with names is all.

 

Cheers Tony.

 

Yeah but trying to ascertain from my wife who she is referring to (in private) is quite different from saying "some black woman is looking for you". It's about showing some respect for the feelings of others. Considering what affect your words might have, rather than just blurting out whatever comes off the top of your head. Same as staring. What is that about in a 1st world country FFS!

[Guest guest37336]

Yeah but trying to ascertain from my wife who she is referring to (in private) is quite different from saying "some black woman is looking for you". It's about showing some respect for the feelings of others. Considering what affect your words might have, rather than just blurting out whatever comes off the top of your head. Same as staring. What is that about in a 1st world country FFS!

 

A private conversation allows more leeway I agree Dom, and as far as the staring goes.

 

Having worked in the East End for a prolonged period you soon learn not to spend too long looking into a strangers eyes, unless you really want to make 'friends' very quickly indeed, generally whilst your having your jaw wired up in A & E.:shocked::policeman:

 

Cheers Tony.

[Guest guest57588]

I disagree with this idea that Australians are just blunt/non-pc, as if that is something to be proud of. My wife, a born and bred Aussie from a white working class Geelong family, never mentions race or colour. Sometimes I have to clarify who she is referring to. For example back when she was working in the NHS she'd be talking about a colleague that I've met, and me being me, I say something like, "is she the black lady?" or "is she the Japanese lady?" etc. The wife looks at me as if I'm a bit dense and says "what's that got to do with anything?" When I'm just trying to work out who it is! This is quite remarkable really if you meet some of my wife's cousins, uncles etc, who are some of the most racist people I've come across.

 

To the OP, it is truly terrible how you've been dealt with. It smacks of total ignorance but also of complete disregard for your and your children's dignity. Being white I've never faced racial discrimination, but I do have some insight (from having had a brother with Down's syndrome, passed away 2 years ago) of how people who are 'different' are treated. When I was young, people were sometimes be rude to the point of extreme cruelty to my brother. He lived for 45 years and in that time, attitudes to him changed beyond recognition. He went from being treated as a freak by some, to being a local icon: in the town where he lived, he was universally liked and known as one of the local characters, as he had a cheeky and engaging personality and was very eccentric!

 

What I'm trying to say is that everyone deserves respect and to be treated with dignity. The attitudes you have come across in Perth remind me of what my brother was up against 30 odd years ago. People need to grow out of labelling people by their skin colour. It clearly causes you offence to be continually 'reminded' of your colour. Australia is changing in this respect, but I think it's a few (decades) years behind the UK.

 

I'm not a big fan of the pc mob as you know Harpo, but over the years that I've been in Oz the bit I've highlighted in your post definitely rings true. You can hide or disguise a lot of racism by saying that your just saying it like it is, calling a spade a spade etc and that you mean no harm. Or that you were only joking. To be honest I've sometimes felt that it was a bit of a 'get out of jail card' for some folk who were being racist as it enabled them to get away with being called racist. I'm not sure if Aussies are anymore racist than anyone else, or maybe they're just a bit more obvious with it. But, at the end of the day it's still racism or intolerance and thats not something for anyone to be proud of. :no:

[Roberts13]

As a mixed race family our experience of Perth is not what we expected. Hubby is white British and I am black (professional with great career from UK and a masters degree...you'll see why I say that later!) Daughter 8 and son 6. Here goes and excuse typos: Perth is a nice place and the kids love the outdoor life but it is not really for us as a family and we are actually going back to UK at the end of the year after 2 years here. The kids get bullied at school coz of their colour (and they are in private school have a friend with similar issues and hers is in a public school) We've found out that a lot of people here are ignorant when it comes to interacial marriage. (we live North of the River)

..............................................and I would encourage anyone to give it a try.

 

 

Just want to say GOOD LUCK with your move back to the UK and i hope you and your family settle back in well and your children can forget anything that has upset them and move on. Hoping you have some nice experiences also to take back with you