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Home for family after 13 years??

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I've lived between here and NZ for the last 13 years. My parents are getting older in the UK, Dad suffers from cancer, lives alone and they miss me terribly. I'm happy in Aus as a country, have a good job, loads of friends, 2 cats and a unit I love. The thought of selling up is totally overwhelming and I must admit I dread living and working in the UK; I left there in my early 20's and it doesn't feel like home but what to do?

Is anyone else in this position? Has anyone else gone back to the UK for family and not themselves (though the guilt does take the shine off being abroad).

When do you know you have to just bite the bullet and go back? Does the decision just come organically?

I'm really glad I've found this site and would appreciate any advice given. I realise that I 'should' be going back and that it's a no brainer but I'm still finding it so hard to sell up, rehome my cats, give in my notice at work.....

Many thanks and best wishes.


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Guest Scotinaus

Hi I also left the UK in my early 20's and havent lived there since and at the moment, don't want to. Our parents are still quite young and I don't know what I'd do if they were I'll but I think I'd try to head back. I'd still not be able to live in the same place as them because of OH work, but it would still be closer than Oz! It's a tough one. I know if an when it does happen to me, my parents are the last ones who would want me to return for their sake, but parents are often selfless like that and mine especially so. I think it would be more about me coming bak so I didn't have to live with the guilt, if I'm honest. And I don't necessarily think that's a terrible thing as you only get one set of parents (two in my case as I have step-parents!). I would want to spend as much time with them as I could.


To be honest I think it depends on tour relationship with them, if they are I'll, etc. Also could you get a job and a house back there? Would you have to move to the same place they are? I'm sure your dad wouldn't want you to jeapordise your career or finances or anything...


Can you go back for an extended visit and take it from there?


Good luck x

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Guest siamsusie

Hi Tupelo,


Welcome to Poms In Oz.


I am sure you will receive loads of advice from our members over the next few days.

This is one of the saddest aspects of migration... sickness, leaving family and friends behind.


Have you possibly looked at renting out your unit to a cat loving person?

There could be all sorts of avenues you could look at without giving up your life here entirely.


I sincerely hope it all works out well for you..... fingers crossed.



Susie x:hug:

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Guest Sancha2

We have been here for 11 years now, came over together at 19 and 21. Our parents are all fine at the moment in the UK but we feel that we want to go back to spend some time with before we do regret being in Oz altogether. Were both thinking that we may come back in a few years but for now its the right thing for us and them to do. When was the last time you went back? Maybe you should go for a few months/weeks so that you can keep what you have here and see the situation over there.

Good Luck!

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