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Bod

Think long and hard before coming home

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Hello All

 

Just a bit of advice for you lot coming home.

 

Its bloody hard, I've been back 3 years now and still not totally got life back in order. I have never regretted coming back, just regret going in the first place.

 

This country is not what it used to to be but it still has alot going for it.

 

Emotionally you will have ups and downs. You just have to work at it. and remember what you did like like About Aus or being away from the mother land.

 

What you have to remember is life has not changed that much for those you left behind. So don't let it put your nose out of joint just because they dont hold a welcome home party with banners down the motorway and a band playing as you enter town.

 

Its just not going to happen, give it a week and it'll be that you never left to every one else.

 

But thats not what its all about so don't get all in a differ about it. What you want to do is get back into live as quickly as possible.

 

Aus is is an amazzing country so think long and hard about coming back.

 

Aus has a great future and a life stlye not betterd by many country, and I could not argue with anyone who says their life is complete in Aus.

 

but for me this country has culture, history and vibrancie Australia lacks. It has far many more walts than Aus but life is never boring (ok most of the time it's not)

 

 

Good luck all

 

Bod


Happy people make dreams come true, miserble people just moan.

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Glad you are making a fist of return and as you say people have to think long and hard.

 

For us Aus is all the culture we need, in fact after our youth of travel around the world we are all cultured out. Happy just to sit back and enjoy our lives.

 

Every country has culture just different culture, Japan is amazing and they still live their culture, i e the politeness and patience of the eastern people has come down through time and shows us how much we have lost from our own culture in my own view.

 

I prefer to remember the UK as it was and am pleased to get back to Aus.


Petals

:ssign15:taking no prisoners :wink:

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Glad you are making a fist of return and as you say people have to think long and hard.

 

For us Aus is all the culture we need, in fact after our youth of travel around the world we are all cultured out. Happy just to sit back and enjoy our lives.

 

Every country has culture just different culture, Japan is amazing and they still live their culture, i e the politeness and patience of the eastern people has come down through time and shows us how much we have lost from our own culture in my own view.

 

I prefer to remember the UK as it was and am pleased to get back to Aus.

 

I love culture Petals espesially Asian culture, but its not every thing. for me it rocks my boat And before I left these shores I could not even tell you what culture is.

 

I can not wait till the day I can go to Japan just hope I'm not to old to remember it.

 

And to be honest for the record putting money and time apart Id give Australia another go. Diffrent area, attitude and far more home work.

 

But as I'm not rich and treasure my time on this planet it looks as if I'm staying hear.

 

Johnx


Happy people make dreams come true, miserble people just moan.

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I love culture Petals espesially Asian culture, but its not every thing. for me it rocks my boat And before I left these shores I could not even tell you what culture is.

 

I can not wait till the day I can go to Japan just hope I'm not to old to remember it.

 

And to be honest for the record putting money and time apart Id give Australia another go. Diffrent area, attitude and far more home work.

 

But as I'm not rich and treasure my time on this planet it looks as if I'm staying hear.

 

Johnx

 

Rolling stone gathers no moss John and I agree we have to be happy with the time we have where we are. Its good everywhere we just have to be prepared to look and see.


Petals

:ssign15:taking no prisoners :wink:

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Guest guest37336

Hi Bod.

 

Very honest opinion and one that I admire. I remember coming back to the UK after my first extended stay in Australia, I don't know what I was expecting, something along the lines of bunting, brass bands and dancing girls, the closest I got was the alarm going off at the immigration station at Heathrow and a rather grumpy and snide official asking, 'Ha, didn't like it then':mad:.

 

But my family were pleased to see me, 'Hellloooooo Tone, great you are back', however after a week as you rightly point out it soon turned to, 'Bloody hell moron, where's that cup of tea I asked for'.:biglaugh:

 

Still, not long now and I hope to be back in OZ, but in the meantime as you say I will enjoy my time back in Blighty because it still has much to offer.

 

Cheers Tony.:wink:

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Guest guest36187

I love a good honest post. Thank you very much for that. Some people think it is easy to slip back into life in UK, for some they can! But it is good to see both sides of the coin. People need the pos and neg to be able to make an informed decision.

 

Thank you for your honesty

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Guest annemarie and brian

great honest post we have been back just 5mths and getting settled now but i think it helped when we got champagne welcome from friends and family and still fightening over us who we see next but if we never had that and it went back to how it was after a week would have been hard....

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Hello All

Its just not going to happen, give it a week and it'll be that you never left to every one else.

 

but isnt that how it should be?

Dont we miss people for who they are and how they affect our lives, not specifically how much attention they give us? I know I do.

 

Sure its nice to have a welcome home get together and a catch up, but are people honestly expecting that their friends and family back home dont also have lives and other stuff to do, and can just gravitate around the new returnees for ages to make their transition easier?

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but isnt that how it should be?

Dont we miss people for who they are and how they affect our lives, not specifically how much attention they give us? I know I do.

 

Sure its nice to have a welcome home get together and a catch up, but are people honestly expecting that their friends and family back home dont also have lives and other stuff to do, and can just gravitate around the new returnees for ages to make their transition easier?

 

I suppose it does depend how long you've been away to how you feel about about this reaction. We have only been away 8 months but we got a very warm reaction....however if I have a disagreement with one of my very good friends I'm told that I have changed.....! most people say I haven't but people will always use this argument if they don't have another. We have slipped back into our life here, we no longer have the big beautiful old house that we left and to some it looks as though we are on our uppers - but we are not-yes we have lost a fortune but gained a great sense of peace that cannot be explained to many. It was our choice to do this and ours alone I don't expect people to be any different. We just love England.....just seeing that the BAFTA's were on the other night warmed my heart. (Dame Judi Dench, Helen Mirren,David Frost,Sir Trevor McDonald) I've just booked a girls weekend in London to see a concert at the O2 (1.5 hours by train from Yorkshire). We also go to the beautiful Spanish Island of Menorca in 2 weeks. All things we have done before but with a much greater appreciation.

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Hi Bod.

 

Very honest opinion and one that I admire. I remember coming back to the UK after my first extended stay in Australia, I don't know what I was expecting, something along the lines of bunting, brass bands and dancing girls, the closest I got was the alarm going off at the immigration station at Heathrow and a rather grumpy and snide official asking, 'Ha, didn't like it then':mad:.

 

But my family were pleased to see me, 'Hellloooooo Tone, great you are back', however after a week as you rightly point out it soon turned to, 'Bloody hell moron, where's that cup of tea I asked for'.:biglaugh:

 

Still, not long now and I hope to be back in OZ, but in the meantime as you say I will enjoy my time back in Blighty because it still has much to offer.

 

Cheers Tony.:wink:

 

Hello Tony

 

People did miss me, close family and friends made a fuss for a little while then it really was back to the slog of getting life in order. I knew what to exspect from when I returned from my back packing and living in Canada, their life carrys on as normal.

I had friends that after I was back I still did'nt see for a couple of years but no big deal did'nt mean they did'nt care just the way thing panned out.

I made no special effort to see anyone as I knew this would be my life for life, and I'd see them eventually.

 

When I come back from a year and a half of traverling, I bumped into one fella who I'd say was a friend. He said "hows things John? not seen you for a couple of weeks"

Missed me then I only got back from Asia yesturday after 18 months.

Huh.

 

I wanted just to blend in, I made such a fuss for the previouse 15 years about going, so the quiter the better.

 

Good luck back in Aus Tony hope you have a great life.

 

Take care

 

John


Happy people make dreams come true, miserble people just moan.

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I suppose it does depend how long you've been away to how you feel about about this reaction. We have only been away 8 months but we got a very warm reaction....however if I have a disagreement with one of my very good friends I'm told that I have changed.....! most people say I haven't but people will always use this argument if they don't have another. We have slipped back into our life here, we no longer have the big beautiful old house that we left and to some it looks as though we are on our uppers - but we are not-yes we have lost a fortune but gained a great sense of peace that cannot be explained to many. It was our choice to do this and ours alone I don't expect people to be any different. We just love England.....just seeing that the BAFTA's were on the other night warmed my heart. (Dame Judi Dench, Helen Mirren,David Frost,Sir Trevor McDonald) I've just booked a girls weekend in London to see a concert at the O2 (1.5 hours by train from Yorkshire). We also go to the beautiful Spanish Island of Menorca in 2 weeks. All things we have done before but with a much greater appreciation.

 

I think I have changed since going to Oz - I think I know myself more and am less inclined to just go along with what others think. Also I am less aggressive than I used to be (I used to have a high powered job - lots of standing your ground and debate). I cant be bothered now - a great aussie trait don't go over the boulder in the road go around it. I love the intelligent humour and debate here and the access to plays, shows and festivals. I hate the poor attitude in places and the aggressive youth culture (worry about my daughter hanging out - but she tells me she is safe I just have to keep checking), I hate some of the pompousness of people vying for position. However i try to keep my world away from all that and I love the countryside and walking my dog off leash across the national trust land that surrounds me, I love the horseriders, bikeriders, kite flyers that are outside my door everyday. I love the pub!!! and sadly very sadly for a middle aged woman - I love Take That (Wembley Stadium 4th July).!!!!!

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Guest The Ropey HOFF
Hello All

 

Just a bit of advice for you lot coming home.

 

Its bloody hard, I've been back 3 years now and still not totally got life back in order. I have never regretted coming back, just regret going in the first place.

 

This country is not what it used to to be but it still has alot going for it.

 

Emotionally you will have ups and downs. You just have to work at it. and remember what you did like like About Aus or being away from the mother land.

 

What you have to remember is life has not changed that much for those you left behind. So don't let it put your nose out of joint just because they dont hold a welcome home party with banners down the motorway and a band playing as you enter town.

 

Its just not going to happen, give it a week and it'll be that you never left to every one else.

 

But thats not what its all about so don't get all in a differ about it. What you want to do is get back into live as quickly as possible.

 

Aus is is an amazzing country so think long and hard about coming back.

 

Aus has a great future and a life stlye not betterd by many country, and I could not argue with anyone who says their life is complete in Aus.

 

but for me this country has culture, history and vibrancie Australia lacks. It has far many more walts than Aus but life is never boring (ok most of the time it's not)

 

 

Good luck all

 

Bod

 

 

Good honest post Bod.:yes:

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Hello All

 

Just a bit of advice for you lot coming home.

 

Its bloody hard, I've been back 3 years now and still not totally got life back in order. I have never regretted coming back, just regret going in the first place.

 

This country is not what it used to to be but it still has alot going for it.

 

Emotionally you will have ups and downs. You just have to work at it. and remember what you did like like About Aus or being away from the mother land.

 

What you have to remember is life has not changed that much for those you left behind. So don't let it put your nose out of joint just because they dont hold a welcome home party with banners down the motorway and a band playing as you enter town.

 

Its just not going to happen, give it a week and it'll be that you never left to every one else.

 

But thats not what its all about so don't get all in a differ about it. What you want to do is get back into live as quickly as possible.

 

Aus is is an amazzing country so think long and hard about coming back.

 

Aus has a great future and a life stlye not betterd by many country, and I could not argue with anyone who says their life is complete in Aus.

 

but for me this country has culture, history and vibrancie Australia lacks. It has far many more walts than Aus but life is never boring (ok most of the time it's not)

 

 

Good luck all

 

Bod

 

Great advice from someone who has lived in both countries.

 

Thank you sunni x

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Guest treesea

Bod, it's been similar for us. I've been back (and dragged my family along for the ride) for seven years now and we still don't earn as much as we did in Australia. Having said that our DD has just walked in the door and said one of her clubs has just arranged six months free gym and swimming pool membershiop at the local leisure centre and then only £1 a visit thereafter.

 

At the end of the day though, and after 16 years in two separate stints in Australia, not to mention well over a decade in NZ , I've come to the conclusion that it's important to live where you want to live on the day, and if you are fortunate enough to be able to afford/be skilled enough to try out a few different places along the way, all the better.

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It's great to be looking over the posts after a long stint of not writing/reading. We were dead set on returning to the UK after a 7 year stint in Melbourne. We love Melbourne and the life it has given us. However, having just started a family (2 boys 3 and 18 months) life has been draining and we missed family. We told All that we were returning, which pleased those back home and saddened those in Oz! Though happy, our family back home were concerned that we were returning for the wrong reason...i.e. them! They said that the family had moved on and were busy with their own lives, didn't we have a really good lifestyle and isn't the UK having a tad difficult time of it at the moment? Anyway, to cut a long story short, they were right and I think we were hoping to immerse ourselves in our families, but that would have been short lived and we would have returned to a lifestyle that we had worked so hard to leave a decade earlier!! I know we have grown in the time we have spent Downunder, but we would not have departed these shores due to a dissatisfaction with our new home, instead we were missing our family. It is a sacrifice and that's that!

 

I feel that we needed to go through this phase of homesickness in order to further settle down. Glad we didn't return as this would have been rash and a mistake. I agree with the sentiment of this thread. Please consider long and hard before taking that leap back!

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What is a walt ??


I want it all, and I want it now.

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It's great to be looking over the posts after a long stint of not writing/reading. We were dead set on returning to the UK after a 7 year stint in Melbourne. We love Melbourne and the life it has given us. However, having just started a family (2 boys 3 and 18 months) life has been draining and we missed family. We told All that we were returning, which pleased those back home and saddened those in Oz! Though happy, our family back home were concerned that we were returning for the wrong reason...i.e. them! They said that the family had moved on and were busy with their own lives, didn't we have a really good lifestyle and isn't the UK having a tad difficult time of it at the moment? Anyway, to cut a long story short, they were right and I think we were hoping to immerse ourselves in our families, but that would have been short lived and we would have returned to a lifestyle that we had worked so hard to leave a decade earlier!! I know we have grown in the time we have spent Downunder, but we would not have departed these shores due to a dissatisfaction with our new home, instead we were missing our family. It is a sacrifice and that's that!

 

I feel that we needed to go through this phase of homesickness in order to further settle down. Glad we didn't return as this would have been rash and a mistake. I agree with the sentiment of this thread. Please consider long and hard before taking that leap back!

 

My mum did return twice for family like you and what happened after the initial homecoming things settled and once more she was at odds with her sisters, etc, such a large family, nine of them. So plenty to row with :laugh:

 

I kept my distance when living in the Uk and mixed mainly with my oh family :laugh:


Petals

:ssign15:taking no prisoners :wink:

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Guest guest30038
What is a walt ??

 

Well the definition I learned when I was in the military is "walter mitty". Guys who say that they have served in special forces etc who would run a mile if they saw a hungry monkey let alone an irate arab.................normally idiot bull****ters just trying to high note themselves.

 

I suppose civvy street has 'em 'n all..............guys gobbing off about how much they earn, "been there done that" guys who have never been anywhere or done anything ie sad b@stards

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Guest chris955

Good post. I do agree though, I think people should look at it in the same way as they did when moving out here. Look for positives and negatives and most importantly decide where they know in their heart they will be happiest.

 

Hello All

 

Just a bit of advice for you lot coming home.

 

Its bloody hard, I've been back 3 years now and still not totally got life back in order. I have never regretted coming back, just regret going in the first place.

 

This country is not what it used to to be but it still has alot going for it.

 

Emotionally you will have ups and downs. You just have to work at it. and remember what you did like like About Aus or being away from the mother land.

 

What you have to remember is life has not changed that much for those you left behind. So don't let it put your nose out of joint just because they dont hold a welcome home party with banners down the motorway and a band playing as you enter town.

 

Its just not going to happen, give it a week and it'll be that you never left to every one else.

 

But thats not what its all about so don't get all in a differ about it. What you want to do is get back into live as quickly as possible.

 

Aus is is an amazzing country so think long and hard about coming back.

 

Aus has a great future and a life stlye not betterd by many country, and I could not argue with anyone who says their life is complete in Aus.

 

but for me this country has culture, history and vibrancie Australia lacks. It has far many more walts than Aus but life is never boring (ok most of the time it's not)

 

 

Good luck all

 

Bod

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A really good thread..when your in the midst of homesickness, it's hard to take on board, because if it's anything like my hubbie had it, it can really grip you and you just want to get back to where you came from! Even though my hearts desire was to stay in Aus, because it is home for me, it was hard to watch him go through it and so we came back. We now believe we probably should have seen it through and as a previous poster said, it can be a phase you go through to further settle down. For some sitting on it will not make any difference and they will come back, but it might just make the difference for others. The pingponging effect it has for some can really muck about with your head, and i really would say to anyone to steer clear of it. We have never regretted any decision, because we believe life is for living and any experience you have just adds to that, but it also comes with stress and we could have saved some of that! A long time down the line we now know we will return to Aus at the right time, and my hubbie has grown to love it there. A country i love and always will. I fully respect this is also how people feel about England, and any country where they feel they belong. Australia has a magic for me because it's where i grew up and where i feel my best, but that does not make it a special place for everyone. One of my children love it there, but the others have no affiliation to it at all..it only holds nice memories for them and they see it as a holiday destination now. You can only wish people the best and hope things work out for them, as it is a long, expensive journey for some, but you can't make them love it. After all whatever decisions we make, ultimately we have to live with and only really affects our lives, because other people will get on with theirs.


Former Resident visa (subclass 151) granted in 1999 - Living back in Perth...

 

 

 

 

Terri :smile:

 

 

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Guest guest36187

In regard to homesickness and/or people sickness....I am a firm believer that EVERYONE goes through it. I know I did. I went through a stage where if I watched television and someone got a hug from their parents I'd be bawling! Sad but true! I don't believe that you get over missing people/places, you just learn to live with it!

 

Just my views x

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Guest Scotinaus
In regard to homesickness and/or people sickness....I am a firm believer that EVERYONE goes through it. I know I did. I went through a stage where if I watched television and someone got a hug from their parents I'd be bawling! Sad but true! I don't believe that you get over missing people/places, you just learn to live with it!

 

Just my views x

 

Totally agree that you just learn to live with it... Sometimes I still wake up and miss my mum terribly, it's like a physical ache. And when I hear people moan about having to go to their parents house for lunch, etc, I gently remind them that I would love to be able to pop round to mine!

 

And agree about the adverts.... Mums with babies, Antiques Roadshow... Anything can set me off on a homesick day :)

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Guest guest36187

Hi scotinaus......

 

Glad it weren't just me! I'm lucky as my parents are here now , bout 90 minutes from us. We see each other regularly and have a great relationship. I feel like I have got to know them more here...become closer?? Does that make sense?

 

I'm at that missing people stage now. I have three cousins who were 10,11 and 12 when we left in 2005. Needless to say now they have all left school, driving, girls, etc!!! Every now and then I realize what I am missing. I need to see my father in law too.....have really missed him.

 

I think we all go throug it, some cope, some dont! I have learnt to live with it but I struggle sometimes! I have two step kids , I haven't seen them in coming on for seven years.....that's a long time.....

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How this thread rings loud. So good to hear like minded people. We've had it all in the last year or so; redundancy, us wanting our 2 young boys to grow up with rellies, new cuz's for our boys, family weddings and parent's being seriously ill! Wow! At the end of the day, we came here for a very sound reason and that reason has both been realized and is still the same; we want a better life for our family. Naturally, that is quite subjective, but it true for us. We are just lucky that our families understand why we made the move and are selfless; they'd love us to return. Yes, no doubt we will feel homesick again, but we feel confident we'll never want to return permanently to the UK; it was quite amazing how devoted to going back we felt just 12 months ago!

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How this thread rings loud. So good to hear like minded people. We've had it all in the last year or so; redundancy, us wanting our 2 young boys to grow up with rellies, new cuz's for our boys, family weddings and parent's being seriously ill! Wow! At the end of the day, we came here for a very sound reason and that reason has both been realized and is still the same; we want a better life for our family. Naturally, that is quite subjective, but it true for us. We are just lucky that our families understand why we made the move and are selfless; they'd love us to return. Yes, no doubt we will feel homesick again, but we feel confident we'll never want to return permanently to the UK; it was quite amazing how devoted to going back we felt just 12 months ago!

 

It's so good you've been able to hang in there, and can now reflect as to how you felt then in comparison to now..hats off to you:notworthy:..i know how hard it can be. I agree with Joanne that homesickness never goes..you just learn to live with it, as people learn to live with missing you. I think the fact that you have been able to push through it is also good for your boys, as moving about can be unsettling and confusing. Carry on enjoying your life there and well done to you!


Former Resident visa (subclass 151) granted in 1999 - Living back in Perth...

 

 

 

 

Terri :smile:

 

 

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