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hilton

Constant Cycle of Making New Friends

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Anyone found it demoralising getting to know new friends in Oz then they leave?

 

Been here 8 months now, met some great friends and have lost count the amount who relocate home or somewhere else for work issues. Fair enough Its probably because we make friends with ex-pats that this happens more often.

Just lost 2 good mates and probably lose another few in near future for various reasons, its very hard to get a support network that everyone talks about when you have this constant cycle.

 

Anyone else experienced this???

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Think its called life, people come into our lives and some stay, others leave. I have friends who I have known most of my life however they have come and gone in my life over the years. They have moved away, I moved away, they moved etc etc and here we all are again. Just always keep in touch.


Petals

:ssign15:taking no prisoners :wink:

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Think its called life, people come into our lives and some stay, others leave. I have friends who I have known most of my life however they have come and gone in my life over the years. They have moved away, I moved away, they moved etc etc and here we all are again. Just always keep in touch.

 

Very True Petals. Its just very tough when your trying to replace a support network that you built up over 20years and when you think your making progress your back to square 1.

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Some of it is dependent on how old you are. We are married with kids, settled in an area we like and most of our friends are the same with the same interests.

My son is 21. His friends are all doing different things. His best mate is off to the UK next week to be a lifeguard for the English summer, some of his other mates have already traveled a bit and come back and he is thinking about traveling.

When you get older you settle down more and are happier with your lot (usually).

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Hi Hilton, know exactly what you are saying here.

Not for quite the same reasons as you, but have found "friendships" here quite demoralising too. We have made what we thought to be terrific friends, only to have them betray or abandon us when we have served our purpose, or outlived our usefulness. It has made us very wary of making new friends anymore, and we are nearing our 40's so would have thought we were all a bit past this "playground" mentality of bitching and backstabbing:unsure:

Saying that, through the tough times there have been some "shining stars" who we will, hopefully, cherish in our lives for many years to come.


TRA /02/2008 TRA passed 14/03/2008

Visa 18/03/2008 PCC 24/04/08 Meds 7/7/08 Meds finalised 30/7/08. VISAS 25 AUGUST 2008 FLY OUT 10/11/08!!!!!

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We've really struggled making any friends :( . We rarely have spare funds so don't go out much. The neighbours just about said hi when we moved in & now turn there back if they see you to avoid speaking & most of the folks who have put posts on here to meet new friends that I've posted back on, you don't here from again, or they say they'll sort a time & never do. I've tried doing the arranging myself but then folks don't turn up. Starting to get a bit paranoid LOL. X


TRA -PASSED, State Sponsorship -PASSED, 176 Visa Lodged 14th Oct, 08, Got CO 17th March 09. VISA GRANTED 21st May, 09 , Ye HAAA!!!!

Heading to Perth , Made the move 26th May, 10:notworthy:

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Hey Cazz,

just noticed that you are down the road from me in Meadow Springs! Perhaps we could get together and break the cycle of "billy no-mates"??!!!!:biglaugh:

 

Send me a PM if you are interested

 

Jill x


TRA /02/2008 TRA passed 14/03/2008

Visa 18/03/2008 PCC 24/04/08 Meds 7/7/08 Meds finalised 30/7/08. VISAS 25 AUGUST 2008 FLY OUT 10/11/08!!!!!

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I can nderstand what your saying Hilton,but personally i dont need freinds that much tbh,if i did i'd go to perth where i know loads,its just a last adventure for me tbh


"The problem with neo conservative capitalism and it's insatiable greed for more wealth and disparity amongst the populace,is that it ended up being the catalyst for the great depression and modern recession"

 

Me,tonight:wubclub:

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Guest Guest 47403
I can nderstand what your saying Hilton,but personally i dont need freinds that much tbh,if i did i'd go to perth where i know loads,its just a last adventure for me tbh

 

I'm the same pabs I don't feel the need to have a big circle of friends, before I met the missus and had kids I used to play golf every Saturday and fish every Sunday with mates since that stopped due to having a family we occasionally text each other that's about it my family seem to take up all my time now can't really see it being to different when we get to Perth. I'm guessing our friends will most likely come through things the kids do, be nice to have a golfing and fishing buddy once a month maybe.

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Hi Hilton, know exactly what you are saying here.

Not for quite the same reasons as you, but have found "friendships" here quite demoralising too. We have made what we thought to be terrific friends, only to have them betray or abandon us when we have served our purpose, or outlived our usefulness. It has made us very wary of making new friends anymore, and we are nearing our 40's so would have thought we were all a bit past this "playground" mentality of bitching and backstabbing:unsure:

Saying that, through the tough times there have been some "shining stars" who we will, hopefully, cherish in our lives for many years to come.

 

Been there and done that!!! I now have only a couple of very close friends who I would trust with my life and lots of acquaintances. I have also branched out into making Aussie friend as they are less likely to abandon me :cute:

 

Love

 

Rudi

x


 

 

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I'm the same pabs I don't feel the need to have a big circle of friends, before I met the missus and had kids I used to play golf every Saturday and fish every Sunday with mates since that stopped due to having a family we occasionally text each other that's about it my family seem to take up all my time now can't really see it being to different when we get to Perth. I'm guessing our friends will most likely come through things the kids do, be nice to have a golfing and fishing buddy once a month maybe.

 

 

Dont get me wrong mate ,ive got dozens of freinds,and i would say 3 or 4 i can count on for anything,known them since infant school,still in touch but dont go out hardly now since the smoking ban,but i dont "need" them,jans been me mate since school anyway,sounds a bit kissarse that doesnt it,but she has,used to bevvy with her for yrs before we got together,but im one of them that likes a float around on my own now and again anyway,sometimes me mates are going to town for a pint sat afternoon but i'l still go on me own,allways end up meeting and talking to other people anyway,whereas if im with me mates we tend to just stay within our group,so i will do the same in oz mate.


"The problem with neo conservative capitalism and it's insatiable greed for more wealth and disparity amongst the populace,is that it ended up being the catalyst for the great depression and modern recession"

 

Me,tonight:wubclub:

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I have met loads of new friends x and people do move on and home x but i do find its good to get to know people on fb as pio is abit annomous !!!! i have friends now that after talking to at different times during the move x in perth, tas, sydney, cairns and melbourne and even in the uk awaiting visas and even some that tried oz and wasnt for them x

i have even got to know people who have moved to a completely different area to me and i have put them in touch with people in their area xxxx

good luck is a big world

inbox me x and you never know ! lol x

carole x

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Guest happysmiler

we now have a great circle of friends around us and even have one or two who we know we can rely on for anything....however that didnt happen overnight and we have had some truely god aweful times since moving here. But i honeslty believe that the reliance we have on our friends, definatley is reduced when you are content within your family life. Just my thoughts.

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Had the same experience as a few of you. Joined a group of friends, all great, parties, bbq's, trips together then things started getting a bit cliquey. Started to not enjoy the company any more. We have a few close friends here and there and thats what we prefer. We are a very close family and love spending time together though.

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I just find I can't do the group thing!!! I think there's aways someone who annoys me in a group and in the end I just get to the point where I don't want to spend time with someone who I really don't like, so I end up moving on. I have got to the point where I don't do the group thing anymore. I have some absolutely lovely friends, but they are not part of groups and I usually see them in ones or twos!!!

 

Love

 

Rudi

x


 

 

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I just find I can't do the group thing!!! I think there's aways someone who annoys me in a group and in the end I just get to the point where I don't want to spend time with someone who I really don't like, so I end up moving on. I have got to the point where I don't do the group thing anymore. I have some absolutely lovely friends, but they are not part of groups and I usually see them in ones or twos!!!

 

Love

 

Rudi

x

 

We have a lot of friends & we rate them like this;

 

Some are golden- be there for you no matter what

Some are silver - be there for you if it's convenient for them

Some are copper - be there when they think about it

Some are like lead- be there when they want something

Our place is like a halfway house and we love it.


"640K ought to be enough for anybody." Bill Gates 1981

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