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Help needed with our just 14 daughter!!

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Hi Everyone,

 

I need your help please! We have a daughter who is just 14 and in year 9 in UK.

 

It would be great if she could find people her age to talk to about moving to Melbourne.At the moment she is not happy at all about moving over there.

 

Please please help to cheer her up.

 

Thanks

 

Antonia & Pat xx

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Hi Everyone,

 

I need your help please! We have a daughter who is just 14 and in year 9 in UK.

 

It would be great if she could find people her age to talk to about moving to Melbourne.At the moment she is not happy at all about moving over there.

 

Please please help to cheer her up.

 

Thanks

 

Antonia & Pat xx

 

Hi there..... Sorry to hear you are having problems with your daughter. If she is anything like my daughter, who is now 16,(although when we started the visa process, she was 15), she may refuse to talk to anyone!!! We too are hoping to emigrate to Melbourne within the next few months and went out to Melbourne in June to validate our visas. We also have family out there, which helps, and since we have come home, Sarah our daughter has come around to the fact that it will happen and we will be moving soon. I know exactly how you are feeling and if I can do anything for you I will....... just let me know how I can help...... Catherine

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Hi Everyone,

 

I need your help please! We have a daughter who is just 14 and in year 9 in UK.

 

It would be great if she could find people her age to talk to about moving to Melbourne.At the moment she is not happy at all about moving over there.

 

Please please help to cheer her up.

 

Thanks

 

Antonia & Pat xx

 

Hi again!!! If your daughter is happy enough, I have a 14 year old son - who cannot wait to move to Australia, and is willing to correspond with your daughter.... Again just let me know if I can be of any help.... Catherine

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Hi Catherine,

Rachael would really like to chat with your son.Thank you so much!!What would be the best way to correspond for your son? For Rachael's msn address please pm me or they can chat over pio or facebook look up Rachael Conerney .Thanks again.Hope to speak to you again.

 

Antonia xxxx

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Hi, our 15 year old daughter is just the same. It is the worst age possible to move even 2 miles down the road, they are so stayed and in their little bubbles. We are also hoping to move to Melbourne. Our daughter is very much against it and any time the conversation comes up she has a massive hissy fit and tells us we are ruining her life. I have found the best way is to gradually add little bits about Australia into conversations so she gets used to the talk about it all. I have also sent for prospectus' of schools for her to look at and although she goes off on one when she first sees them she does sit down and look through them eventually. Like anything with teenagers it is a case of letting them do things in their own time. Nice and easy does it.

What part of Melbourne are you looking at?

Sarah

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Hi Catherine,

Rachael would really like to chat with your son.Thank you so much!!What would be the best way to correspond for your son? For Rachael's msn address please PM me or they can chat over pio or facebook look up Rachael Conerney .Thanks again.Hope to speak to you again.

 

Antonia xxxx

 

Hi Antonia..... My son is called Steven Bryans and he is on the case already.... He will try to contact your daughter through Facebook if that is ok? Just ask her to accept him as a friend..... And don't worry, as I said, he is all for the move to Australia and he would move tomorrow if he could!!!!! Catherine

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Not 100% sure at the moment.It depends on where my husband is located.Need to have a good look at areas when we get there too.Looking at some online like Point Cooke,Berwick,Cranebourne,Kew,Mornington.Like I said not sure yet.How about you? When are you hoping to go?

 

Antonia x

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Sorry Sarah ended that post too quickly.I meant to say thank you for replying and that Rachael is exactly the same with the hissy fits & you are ruining my life bit.I am glad she is not the only teenager behaving like this.I know it will be difficult for because of her age but we truly believe that her life will be better in the long run.

 

Thanks for your support.

 

Antonia xx

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Thank you Catherine and thank Steven for me too I hope he can convince her that this move will make her life better and be a fantastic adventure.

 

Antonia xx

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Hi, our 15 year old daughter is just the same. It is the worst age possible to move even 2 miles down the road, they are so stayed and in their little bubbles. We are also hoping to move to Melbourne. Our daughter is very much against it and any time the conversation comes up she has a massive hissy fit and tells us we are ruining her life. I have found the best way is to gradually add little bits about Australia into conversations so she gets used to the talk about it all. I have also sent for prospectus' of schools for her to look at and although she goes off on one when she first sees them she does sit down and look through them eventually. Like anything with teenagers it is a case of letting them do things in their own time. Nice and easy does it.

What part of Melbourne are you looking at?

Sarah

 

Hi Sarah.... This situation sounds so familiar!!!!! Our daughter was exactly the same!!!! It is such hard work... As I have already said to Antonia my son is willing to contact anyone either by E-Mail or facebook if they wish to talk to him.. We have been in the fortunate position that we were in Melbourne recently and my son is all for the move... . I know when we decided to make the move, I was on all the websites looking for help with my daughter, and I have made a few lovely friends along the way. Hope to speak soon.... Catherine

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Thanks, will ask my daughter first as I don't want to antagonise her any more than I seem to already!! Lol. When are you hoping to go out there?

We have been told by our visa agents it should be about July next year, but they really can't give any firm estimates as things are so up in the air at the moment.

It is really difficult as my daughter wanted to do A levels here, but timing will be out for that. Hopefully she will find a college that she likes there.

Many thanks, Sarah

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Thanks, will ask my daughter first as I don't want to antagonise her any more than I seem to already!! Lol. When are you hoping to go out there?

We have been told by our visa agents it should be about July next year, but they really can't give any firm estimates as things are so up in the air at the moment.

It is really difficult as my daughter wanted to do A levels here, but timing will be out for that. Hopefully she will find a college that she likes there.

Many thanks, Sarah

 

Hi Sarah.. It is a good idea to ask your daughter first. Although, we would ask our daughter to chat with a few people and she totally refused!!!!:arghh: Fortunately, our son is more willing to chat to anyone!! LOL.... We are hoping to move in December/January time and already have our visas since Dec last year (took about 8 months to be progressed). Out daughter has just had her GCSE results and is now back at school doing her A levels, not an ideal position I know....as you say not good timing... but it is now or never. Hope you get things sorted out with your daughter and if you need any help you know where I am. Catherine

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Guest GillianM

Hi there, we have been in Berwick, Melbourne for 11 weeks now. It has been hard especially with teenage kids. My daughter will be 19 in Dec and hates it here so she has decided to go home Dec/Jan time. My 14 year old daughter Brogan hates it here too and wants to go home. Its so hard listening to them constantly complaining all time and making harder to settle here. She hates everything about the place and goes to Kambraya College in year 8 and hates school too. Im not sure what we will do about it, if we stay or go home but i hate seeing them so unhappy. I think back home they are used to going out with friends all the time and here they are stuck in house most of the time. They dont want to go sight seeing because its boring and they dont want to go to BBQs cause they dont want to sit around adults drinking and talking. She finds the kids here are very different to friends back home and says their boring! I say it will get better but shes not listening and adamant shes going home. If you want to get your daughter or son to talk to her i can give you her facebook name or email address just private mail me.

 

Gillian

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How is she finding the school there? We are deliberating between a state or a private school. Did you look round first or apply in advance?

Are you renting at the moment? Did you find it hard to find somewhere?

It must be really hard for you, but always keep in mind that NO MATTER what you do or where you are you will never be able to fully please a teenager....then what happens when they bugger off and leave anyway?!!! That's what we keep telling ourselves anyway....just trying to keep sane!!!!

How are you finding the social side of things for yourselves, despite the kids?x

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Hi there, we have been in Berwick, Melbourne for 11 weeks now. It has been hard especially with teenage kids. My daughter will be 19 in Dec and hates it here so she has decided to go home Dec/Jan time. My 14 year old daughter Brogan hates it here too and wants to go home. Its so hard listening to them constantly complaining all time and making harder to settle here. She hates everything about the place and goes to Kambraya College in year 8 and hates school too. Im not sure what we will do about it, if we stay or go home but i hate seeing them so unhappy. I think back home they are used to going out with friends all the time and here they are stuck in house most of the time. They dont want to go sight seeing because its boring and they dont want to go to BBQs cause they dont want to sit around adults drinking and talking. She finds the kids here are very different to friends back home and says their boring! I say it will get better but shes not listening and adamant shes going home. If you want to get your daughter or son to talk to her i can give you her facebook name or email address just private mail me.

 

Gillian

 

Hi Gillian,

OMG what a nightmare!! Thanks for your reply.

Did your daughter want to go at the beginning?I can't work mine out she keeps saying she doesn't want to go & we are ruining her life.She says she won't be able to make friends etc.She does talk a bit about it and then just shuts off.It puts a real downer on the whole thing.Maybe it would be good for them to chat on facebook.

 

We are thinking of Berwick as an area to live too.If so they may become friends.My daughter was 14 at the beginning of September.

 

What is the school like?

 

I also have an 8 year old daughter & 10 year old son.

 

If Brogan would like to she can add Rachael Conerney as a friend.

 

How are you & your husband finding it? I hope you don't think I am being nosey but does your husband work for Woods by any chance?

 

Hope to be in contact with you soon.

 

Antonia x

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Guest GillianM

Hi, SGHJLL, i know what you mean you can never please them but i feel for her and when their not happy im not happy. We had an agency find us a rental in Berwick so that was fine as it saved us the hassle of getting one. I made sure we lived near a school for our daughter so she just had a short walk to school. When we arrived i got in touch with the school and met the teacher and took it from there, i never looked into anything before we came or any other school as i wanted her to go to the nearest school from our rental. She seems fine but some kids are still bitches like back home, and they are different from back home she said. She was never a bright kid at school, always struggled with work, but the maths here she dosn't know what to do as shes never done it before, but she couldn't really do maths back home either. She was on skype to her granny this morning and when she came off she started to cry, i felt so bad and she walked to school upset. I feel i have ruined her life and she dosn't have much of a social life here. I haven't even been out here, there 1 pub in Berwick town and some restaurants. Theres Castellos which have a nightclub but i think its young folk that go. I wouldn't say theres alot of nightlife here, you would need to go in the city but getting back on the train at night can be dodgy! All you do here when its sunny is sight see, go to the beach or have a BBQ. I don't know if its me really and doing that all time that eventually ill get bored doing that too. The hardest is not knowing anyone, and you feel so alone. Also not working yet so that dosn't help. We all as a family don't know if heres what we want, but if we went home the job situation isn't good. If Brogan was happy and settled we would give it a go but were in two minds at the moment. When are you coming over and how old are your kids?

 

Gillian

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Guest GillianM

Hi Antonia, my OH did originally work for Woods but he lasted 2 weeks there, it wasn't for him. But luckily we had PR. We got ATC to get us a rental too which was a big help. Brogan at first didn't want to go, she said she wouldn't make friends etc..then she was looking forward in going as people were saying how good it will be, sunny all time and kids would love her and she'd have a great life there. Since we arrived it was winter and freezing and rained for about 3 weeks. We couldn't believe the weather here. Then we enrolled her in Kambraya College, she was fine untill we had to go buy her uniform, she said it was awfull and if she wore that bach home you would get bullied lol the good thing everyone wears the same but she wasn't used to wearing that sort of uniform. The shoes were awfull, black, flat and with a buckle. The backpack is like something they wore in P1 P2 at home and the shoes lol you have to buy stationery and books which are dear, uniform dear. They wear black tights with white ankle socks over them! you wouldn't wear that back home but here they do. I don't know if Melbourne is for us but if Brogan was happier we may give it a chance but at the moment were in two minds wheither to go home. My eldest daughter is 18 and going home end of the year. The big factor is not knowing people and you all are stuck with each other all the time day and night in you rental getting on each others nerves because back home the kids went out with friends and had a social life, here the kids don't go out. Ive heard they do in summer but rest of the time no one goes out in winter. She says the girls all talk about each other and she dosn't like it. She went to a disco at a school twice, but she hated it. She says the music is different and they dance different and they walk round and round all time and she was like i just wanted to dance or sit down but they keep walking round the place, theyre so boring she said. Its supposed to be 19 today and 25 and 27 on thurs and frid, thank god! the weather hasn't been that great. People say its the worst winter here in years, just our luck! and its end of Oct and its still nothing great. Never had 2 days sunny, always 1 day 1 week and then cold windy and wet. Anyway ill give Brogan your daughters Name to add on Facebook and they can talk. She is Brogan Gallagher. She was 14 end of March. When you coming over?

 

Gillian

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Guest GillianM

Hi Antonia, Brogan has just added her as a friend but not sure if its your daughter as there's a picture of 2 girls and it dosn't say where you come from or anything. So if she checks and there is a friend request for Brogan Gallagher from Melbourne, its her okay.

 

Gillian

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Hi Gillian,

I am sorry to hear that things aren't great for you at the moment.I do hope it gets better.

I will get Rachael to accept the friend request when she is in from school.I'm sure you have the right Rachael that sounds like her picture.

 

How long do you think you will give it a go for?

 

The school unifrom sounds really awful,Rachael will not be impressed!

 

Was your husband able to find a new job quite easily after leaving Woods? I hope so.

 

Was Woods very different from the body shops in the UK? If so,in what way?

 

I hope we can keep in touch and talk soon.Take care.

 

Antonia xx

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Guest Phillida

Hi everyone,

Its so reassuring listening to all your posts. I am a single mum and hoping to be moved to Brisbane (Gold Coast) area by next summer. Visa application ready to go in now. Whilst my 17 yr old son is all for it and can't wait to get there, my 14yr old daughter (who was all for it, as its been the plan for the last 4yrs) is now saying she doesn't want to go. I know that once she is there, she will love it as we have been before and both of them loved every minute of our time there.

I am having a bad time with her right now as she is really playing up and I'm sure this emigration thing has got a lot to do with her behaviour. But unfortunately I can't get her to sit down to even chat about normal things let alone Australia. She knows that it will happen now, but I find myself avoiding the subject with her as I don't want to encourage anymore negativity.

I am open to any ideas you guys might have to help the situation

Thanks

Phillida

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Guest Phillida

HI,

I am a single mother and hoping to be movign to Brisbane/Gold Coast area some time next year.

Your not on your own with this,

My 14 yr old daughter is not happy about this and her behaviour at the moment is not good, I do feel its partly due to the fact that we will be moving there, visa permitting.

She has been before so knows the kind of life she can have there, but now she has made this group of friends and does not want to leave.

No way would we go without her of course.

Any suggestions or ideas would be welcome!

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Guest Phillida
Hi, our 15 year old daughter is just the same. It is the worst age possible to move even 2 miles down the road, they are so stayed and in their little bubbles. We are also hoping to move to Melbourne. Our daughter is very much against it and any time the conversation comes up she has a massive hissy fit and tells us we are ruining her life. I have found the best way is to gradually add little bits about Australia into conversations so she gets used to the talk about it all. I have also sent for prospectus' of schools for her to look at and although she goes off on one when she first sees them she does sit down and look through them eventually. Like anything with teenagers it is a case of letting them do things in their own time. Nice and easy does it.

What part of Melbourne are you looking at?

Sarah

 

HI

,Your not on your own with this Sarah,

 

I am a single mother and hoping to be movign to Brisbane/Gold Coast area some time next year.

My 14 yr old daughter is not happy about this and her behaviour at the moment is not good, I do feel its partly due to the fact that we will be moving there, visa permitting.

She has been before so knows the kind of life she can have there, but now she has made this group of friends and does not want to leave.

No way would we go without her of course.

Any suggestions or ideas would be welcome!

Phillida in still in UK

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Guest Coxy04

Hi All, We're waiting for SS for Victoria, and are aiming for Geelong area as soon after July as we can get our visa. We have a 19 yr old daughter, who wasn't going to come with us to start with, but who now can't wait to get out there, and her boyfriend is coming on working visa too. Then we have a nearly 16 yr old daughter, who didn't speak to us for 2 weeks at first, then we had the pestering as to how soon we could go, and since then we have had lows and highs....and at the moment i guess she has just resigned herself to give it a go. We found it was pointless trying to talk her round as she was too emotional and hormonal, and anything we said hit a brick wall. So we have just fed her small pieces of positives, stuff other Brits have posted on here about experiences with schools v colleges, which has now seen her have a turn around in opinions and she's now keen to return to school. She will miss her friends for sure, but once she leaves school her whole life will change anyhow, even if we stayed in the UK. We also have 2 little ones, and they are excited and a 23 yr old son, who will follow us out, as he doesn't have enough points yet in his own right. We have deliberately tried to be honest about everything, it will be a learning curve for us all, and we will all have to effectively start again.....so we have tried not to shove 'it'll be perfect' down her throat...and just asked for her to go with a positive open mind, give it her best shot, and if she hates it....then she has choices when she's old enough to make them. Good luck.....if you think she'd like to talk to my daughter,message me, as she's on facebook too. All the best. Tania

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Thanks for the post Tania, you sound in a very similar situation to us. What schools/colleges do you like the look of it that area? That is the biggest issue to our daughter as she goes to grammar school here and I don't think she feels like any of our price range schools will come up to that standard, also having looked at the prospectus she said she has already covered the subjects (especially history) that they will be doing. Thanks for getting in touch, would be nice for the girls to chat, Sarah

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Hi, thanks for your post. I think the trouble is that our daughter wants to stay in the UK with her grandparents following an offer from my mum (which I did ask her not to offer)! Trouble is that my parents want to spend lots of time out there with us too, so our daughter will be holding them back if she stays here. Bit of a pickle! Lots of respect to you as a single parent taking this on. If only our children would know that it is in their interest that we are making this big move, eh?

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