The Time has come - how do i tell my family?

[melaniecharlton]

Why dont you try and sell the idea of moving to Oz to your parents? Could they not come out here on a parent visa eventually? If they are South African then the lifestyle would be better suited to them here. I am a South African who lived in the UK for 12 years. We have now been in Oz for 3 months and once we gain PR in a couple of years I hope to get my folks out here on a parent visa. They want to be close to use as we have 3 kids.

[angphil]

Tell them you are going for a year, which they will be-grudgingly accept,

 

Then after a year, they will be used to you been away, then tell them you plan on staying.

 

Kind of breaks them in easier.

 

My parents are not happy that we are going, but accept that it is our decision, my wifes parents on the other hand are thrilled because they get to come and stay with us, and they plan on retiring there in 4 years, and because we have PR we can help out with that, with the balance of family visa route.

 

Dont tell them its forever, because 1. It might not be, and 2. Its a harder pill to swallow.

 

Jon

 

We have gone down this route. My Dad has been brilliant, but my Mum is devistated. We told them as soon as we decided, we have now got our visa and are planning on going in July next year. Mum is always saying things like, "the last Xmas we will have together," which I find really hard. Mum keeps saying we'll love it and not come back, but like you say we don't know. My Dad is hoping once we are there my Mum will miss us so much they can come over on parents visas.

 

I am dreading getting on the plane, as I feel so guilty about hurting my Mum :sad: but I also know we have to do what's best for us and the kids.

[Fisher1]

Hi all

 

I thought you might like to hear a view from the other side of the debate and might find it helpful. I am the parent in UK of a pom-in-oz and we are just approaching the seventh anniversary of her departure. This is our only child so, as you can imagine there have been sad times.

However, I believe that your job as a parent is to enable your kid(s) to think and act for themselves as adults, hopefully so they can lead useful and happy lives. Our daughter went for a year initially, and we werent surprised because she had been talking about it for a couple of years and had already spent a month there on holiday. I wont pretend there weren't tears all round when she left but hey, that's part of life. I am soooooo proud of what she has achieved in here ozzie life - great job, nice place to live, decent income, fantastic friends. Her dad and I have visited three times, we all met once in Thailand and she has been back to UK several times. We have skype, we have text messaging - I quite often get a text out of the blue with a snippet of her day in it. We have facebook. Okay it isnt the same as face to face contact but it's a far cry from what migration to Australia used to mean.

 

My reason for joining this site was because I was searching for a forum for 'parents - not - in - oz' to share information, thoughts, ideas for staying in touch .... but couldnt find one. My advice? tell your family from the start, keep them in the loop, stay in touch when you go and visit when you can. During the recent riots in London I was so glad that my lovely daughter is living a healthier happier outdoor life than she did in Highbury!

 

Anyone with parents who would like to set up our own forum, or a side branch of this one, let me know!