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I know no one will care but...........

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1 hour ago, simmo said:

I heard it was like Australia's version of Bexhill on sea.

In that case I'd probably really like Bexhill on Sea.  Never heard of it mind you.  😉

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2 hours ago, simmo said:

I heard it was like Australia's version of Bexhill on sea.

I wonder where @newjez and @Perthbum are? They’ve not been on here for a while.

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3 hours ago, Toots said:

I know who the boss is in your house   ...............................  and it isn't you.  😋

He tries to steal food off my plate!   He’s such a friendly wee guy. I just wish sometimes he has a mute button at times 😂

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5 hours ago, Tulip1 said:

I wonder where @newjez and @Perthbum are? They’ve not been on here for a while.

sulking

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3 hours ago, simmo said:

sulking

It’s quiet without them, I hope they stop sulking soon and come back 

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It's got really boring on here lately - why could that be?🤔

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8 hours ago, simmo said:

It's got really boring on here lately - why could that be?🤔

It hasn’t for the moderators, it’s been a welcomed break.

It Is funny though because I do agree with your post in that most of the members who were placed on moderated  including the ones who weren’t and the ones who reported posts none stop every day screaming of racism and politics etc all seem to stop posting when we stop these types of posts - why could that be? 🤔

Do they not know any other topics other than violence, politics, racism etc?

Do you think it’s that they are the type of person who just likes falling out and arguing?

Do any of these people help members in the forum and post elsewhere or only post to cause conflict/belittle others?

Do you think they could actually be on the wrong forum, maybe one where they could chat with thousands of like minded individuals would be better suited?
 

I don’t need any answers because I’m just thinking out loud. 

 

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If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.

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28 minutes ago, The Pom Queen said:

It hasn’t for the moderators, it’s been a welcomed break.

It Is funny though because I do agree with your post in that most of the members who were placed on moderated  including the ones who weren’t and the ones who reported posts none stop every day screaming of racism and politics etc all seem to stop posting when we stop these types of posts - why could that be? 🤔

Do they not know any other topics other than violence, politics, racism etc?

Do you think it’s that they are the type of person who just likes falling out and arguing?

Do any of these people help members in the forum and post elsewhere or only post to cause conflict/belittle others?

Do you think they could actually be on the wrong forum, maybe one where they could chat with thousands of like minded individuals would be better suited?
 

I don’t need any answers because I’m just thinking out loud. 

 

Oh dear. Another one of those posts that gets everyone wondering who could they possibly be referring to.?

 

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I think it’s a great shame it’s gone so quiet. I appreciate that may be nice for the moderators but CTF shouldn’t be full of little sweet, fluffy people who say lovely things all the time. It’s the equivalent to sitting in the pub with a big crowd having a few drinks and debating over issues. The conversation may get a bit heated and a bit ‘below the belt’ at times but that’s what makes it interesting. All those people in that crowd would be nice, descent people just having a bit of banter. If people on here keep reporting things then they’re on the wrong forum and quite frankly, need to get a grip. If they don’t like what’s being said they shouldn’t read it. Perhaps they should go and find some knitting forum or something. If you can’t stand the heat get out the kitchen comes to mind. Humans will always have debates over life and life includes everything from opinions on the price of bread to opinions on racism, religion and so on. It’s ok not to agree on everything and it’s ok to think differently on these subjects to others. That’s where forums such as CTF come into play. I assume the likes of Perthbum and newjez are on the naughty step. The worry is they will think I can’t be arsed with all this and leave for good. It’s not the complainers that make this forum fun,  it’s the likes of Perthbum and newjez who bring humour, outrageousness, dry sarcasm and wit. 

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1 minute ago, Tulip1 said:

I think it’s a great shame it’s gone so quiet. I appreciate that may be nice for the moderators but CTF shouldn’t be full of little sweet, fluffy people who say lovely things all the time. It’s the equivalent to sitting in the pub with a big crowd having a few drinks and debating over issues. The conversation may get a bit heated and a bit ‘below the belt’ at times but that’s what makes it interesting. All those people in that crowd would be nice, descent people just having a bit of banter. If people on here keep reporting things then they’re on the wrong forum and quite frankly, need to get a grip. If they don’t like what’s being said they shouldn’t read it. Perhaps they should go and find some knitting forum or something. If you can’t stand the heat get out the kitchen comes to mind. Humans will always have debates over life and life includes everything from opinions on the price of bread to opinions on racism, religion and so on. It’s ok not to agree on everything and it’s ok to think differently on these subjects to others. That’s where forums such as CTF come into play. I assume the likes of Perthbum and newjez are on the naughty step. The worry is they will think I can’t be arsed with all this and leave for good. It’s not the complainers that make this forum fun,  it’s the likes of Perthbum and newjez who bring humour, outrageousness, dry sarcasm and wit. 

You’re taking-the-piss??

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10 hours ago, simmo said:

It's got really boring on here lately - why could that be?🤔

Agree 

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2 hours ago, Tulip1 said:

I think it’s a great shame it’s gone so quiet. I appreciate that may be nice for the moderators but CTF shouldn’t be full of little sweet, fluffy people who say lovely things all the time. It’s the equivalent to sitting in the pub with a big crowd having a few drinks and debating over issues. The conversation may get a bit heated and a bit ‘below the belt’ at times but that’s what makes it interesting. All those people in that crowd would be nice, descent people just having a bit of banter. If people on here keep reporting things then they’re on the wrong forum and quite frankly, need to get a grip. If they don’t like what’s being said they shouldn’t read it. Perhaps they should go and find some knitting forum or something. If you can’t stand the heat get out the kitchen comes to mind. Humans will always have debates over life and life includes everything from opinions on the price of bread to opinions on racism, religion and so on. It’s ok not to agree on everything and it’s ok to think differently on these subjects to others. That’s where forums such as CTF come into play. I assume the likes of Perthbum and newjez are on the naughty step. The worry is they will think I can’t be arsed with all this and leave for good. It’s not the complainers that make this forum fun,  it’s the likes of Perthbum and newjez who bring humour, outrageousness, dry sarcasm and wit. 

I agree with everything you have stated BUT I draw the line at members who belittle other members in an arrogant fashion, usually because their views on race, politics, yadda yadda yadda are polar opposites.   Instead of a bit of discussion and banter it always seems to sink to personal insults.  This of course only applies to a very few PIO members but look how it has ended up.  I also agree with what you say 'if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen'.   Go and find a politics forum and argue to you heart's content.  

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29 minutes ago, Toots said:

 Instead of a bit of discussion and banter it always seems to sink to personal insults.

I agree too, BUT the meaning of the word "banter" seems to have changed since I was young.  Then, it was light-hearted teasing.  Now, it seems like you can say horribly mean things and then get off the hook by saying "but it's just a bit of banter". 

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Scot by birth, emigrated 1985 | Aussie husband applied UK spouse visa Jan 2015, granted March 2015, moved to UK May 2015 | Returned to Oz June 2016

"The stranger who comes home does not make himself at home but makes home itself strange." -- Rainer Maria Rilke

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38 minutes ago, Marisawright said:

I agree too, BUT the meaning of the word "banter" seems to have changed since I was young.  Then, it was light-hearted teasing.  Now, it seems like you can say horribly mean things and then get off the hook by saying "but it's just a bit of banter". 

There is too much of what you are referring to in your last sentence.  Banter/craic is usually fun but here occasionally used as a strange form of sarcasm   .....................  sarcasm isn't always clever and witty.  It can be a cover for sheer nastiness.  

Most PIO members are lovely though.  😀

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4 hours ago, Tulip1 said:

I think it’s a great shame it’s gone so quiet. I appreciate that may be nice for the moderators but CTF shouldn’t be full of little sweet, fluffy people who say lovely things all the time. It’s the equivalent to sitting in the pub with a big crowd having a few drinks and debating over issues. The conversation may get a bit heated and a bit ‘below the belt’ at times but that’s what makes it interesting. All those people in that crowd would be nice, descent people just having a bit of banter. If people on here keep reporting things then they’re on the wrong forum and quite frankly, need to get a grip. If they don’t like what’s being said they shouldn’t read it. Perhaps they should go and find some knitting forum or something. If you can’t stand the heat get out the kitchen comes to mind. Humans will always have debates over life and life includes everything from opinions on the price of bread to opinions on racism, religion and so on. It’s ok not to agree on everything and it’s ok to think differently on these subjects to others. That’s where forums such as CTF come into play. I assume the likes of Perthbum and newjez are on the naughty step. The worry is they will think I can’t be arsed with all this and leave for good. It’s not the complainers that make this forum fun,  it’s the likes of Perthbum and newjez who bring humour, outrageousness, dry sarcasm and wit. 

I agree with a lot of what you have said too, except the pub bit. I would say its more like sitting in someones house or garden and totally disrespecting their house rules. After all PIO is a private forum with rules you agree to abide by when you sign up, not a public area open for a free for all. I dont think anyone wants it to be all fluffy but its not nice seeing nasty and personal comments about a member or the members family because they've voiced their option either, so a bit of a catch 22 and sadly a very small minority did take things too far.

The only other thing i will also add, is that over the years i've been around PIO, this isnt the first time members have disappeared and it as 'gone quiet' in CTF after a clamp down, normally some return after a while, albeit some choose a new user name but their posting style gives them away before too long,lol.

I would be interested to know if this clamp down has affected the rest of the forum as i find that highly unlikely and cant say i have noticed a reduction in replies or threads in other sections of PIO.

     Cal x

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If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place...

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4 hours ago, Tulip1 said:

I think it’s a great shame it’s gone so quiet. I appreciate that may be nice for the moderators but CTF shouldn’t be full of little sweet, fluffy people who say lovely things all the time. It’s the equivalent to sitting in the pub with a big crowd having a few drinks and debating over issues. The conversation may get a bit heated and a bit ‘below the belt’ at times but that’s what makes it interesting. All those people in that crowd would be nice, descent people just having a bit of banter. If people on here keep reporting things then they’re on the wrong forum and quite frankly, need to get a grip. If they don’t like what’s being said they shouldn’t read it. Perhaps they should go and find some knitting forum or something. If you can’t stand the heat get out the kitchen comes to mind. Humans will always have debates over life and life includes everything from opinions on the price of bread to opinions on racism, religion and so on. It’s ok not to agree on everything and it’s ok to think differently on these subjects to others. That’s where forums such as CTF come into play. I assume the likes of Perthbum and newjez are on the naughty step. The worry is they will think I can’t be arsed with all this and leave for good. It’s not the complainers that make this forum fun,  it’s the likes of Perthbum and newjez who bring humour, outrageousness, dry sarcasm and wit. 

I don’t expect it to be sweet and fluffy Tulip but I would hope people could discuss matters without the personal  attacks that happen. In regards to posts we have been accused of allowing racist posts and received constant abuse and reports from two particular members. I had a conversation with the NIS of the AHRC this week (seen as we keep getting threats to be reported to them) and i am perfectly happy with their response. 
‘Members never just discuss the subject it just becomes a point score between them. 
‘This month has been the worst we have seen in a long time for personal attacks, duplicate accounts, pm’s sent to members with threats, and the abuse/language that was sent to moderators which I can’t repeat with one threat saying they knew where a mod worked etc. These left two mods on the verge of stepping down and one seeking legal action. 

Now I’m sorry but none of the above is banter or having a few drinks down the pub with a mate. 
‘I agree that people should be able to hold a reasonable discussion, yes, sometimes heated, without having to get personal, threaten moderators so they don’t feel safe in their own home or threaten to report the forum to XYZ authorities if they don’t get their own way. 
Now how on earth we do this @Tulip1 I’ve no idea.  Ali started a thread whilst I was in hospital asking for help from members and we all remember how that turned out for her. 
So at the moment, I am trying to sort out some guidelines and rules for the forum and until then we have certain members posts on moderated.  I can assure you from what I have seen 99% of content is getting through and it is mainly  posts that have personal attacks in or racist, political, religious new threads we have been holding back. In regards to Newjez and PB I have no idea where they are. I will personally check their accounts later though as sometimes points don’t drop off manually and unless we check them they create an ongoing ban. This would need to be something Cerberus our other admin sorts because I don’t have access.

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If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.

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3 hours ago, Toots said:

I agree with everything you have stated BUT I draw the line at members who belittle other members in an arrogant fashion, usually because their views on race, politics, yadda yadda yadda are polar opposites.   Instead of a bit of discussion and banter it always seems to sink to personal insults.  This of course only applies to a very few PIO members but look how it has ended up.  I also agree with what you say 'if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen'.   Go and find a politics forum and argue to you heart's content.  

This is exactly the problem we have @Toots I should have read all the posts before replying to Tulip, but you hit the nail on the head. It’s the nastiness and vindictiveness we don’t like or the sarcastic little digs hidden in posts. 
‘The other issue is that people then respond instead of hitting report or ignoring.  It then drags over on to other threads and by the time  mods have logged back on then CTF is completely full of bickering that we end up missing some comments. then when we next sign off somebody will quote that and it’s a viscous circle.  
‘Let’s face it as well, if you were down the pub there is a good chance at the end of the night you would buy each other a beer and stagger home together, whereas on the forum, emotions continue to run high and that insult you received on the Brexit thread on Thursday night from MrsX is still making your blood boil on Saturday night when you log on.

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If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.

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yes its gone quiet and a little boring atm , I have to admit the thought of new threads being moderated doesn't appeal to me , at the end of the day its common sense , we all know how far to push the buttons but would be good to keep it fun with banter ……..

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1 hour ago, The Pom Queen said:

I don’t expect it to be sweet and fluffy Tulip but I would hope people could discuss matters without the personal  attacks that happen. In regards to posts we have been accused of allowing racist posts and received constant abuse and reports from two particular members. I had a conversation with the NIS of the AHRC this week (seen as we keep getting threats to be reported to them) and i am perfectly happy with their response. 
‘Members never just discuss the subject it just becomes a point score between them. 
‘This month has been the worst we have seen in a long time for personal attacks, duplicate accounts, pm’s sent to members with threats, and the abuse/language that was sent to moderators which I can’t repeat with one threat saying they knew where a mod worked etc. These left two mods on the verge of stepping down and one seeking legal action. 

Now I’m sorry but none of the above is banter or having a few drinks down the pub with a mate. 
‘I agree that people should be able to hold a reasonable discussion, yes, sometimes heated, without having to get personal, threaten moderators so they don’t feel safe in their own home or threaten to report the forum to XYZ authorities if they don’t get their own way. 
Now how on earth we do this @Tulip1 I’ve no idea.  Ali started a thread whilst I was in hospital asking for help from members and we all remember how that turned out for her. 
So at the moment, I am trying to sort out some guidelines and rules for the forum and until then we have certain members posts on moderated.  I can assure you from what I have seen 99% of content is getting through and it is mainly  posts that have personal attacks in or racist, political, religious new threads we have been holding back. In regards to Newjez and PB I have no idea where they are. I will personally check their accounts later though as sometimes points don’t drop off manually and unless we check them they create an ongoing ban. This would need to be something Cerberus our other admin sorts because I don’t have access.

You are all doing an amazing job. Please don’t think I ever thought any different. It certainly wasn’t any of you I was thinking about, more the ones that report everything and from what you say, take it even further and give you all a bad time which is disgusting. I am grateful for all that you do and I’m sure I’m not alone. 

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1 minute ago, tonyman said:

yes its gone quiet and a little boring atm , I have to admit the thought of new threads being moderated doesn't appeal to me , at the end of the day its common sense , we all know how far to push the buttons but would be good to keep it fun with banter ……..

But that's the thing isn't it .. it isn't fun, a lot of it isn't banter and people don't exercise common sense - If they did then you're right there wouldn't have been a need for admin to take the action they did.  I'd suggest reading the Pom Queens post in response to Tulip to has a sense of how bad things got

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1 minute ago, ali said:

But that's the thing isn't it .. it isn't fun, a lot of it isn't banter and people don't exercise common sense - If they did then you're right there wouldn't have been a need for admin to take the action they did.  I'd suggest reading the Pom Queens post in response to Tulip to has a sense of how bad things got

yes I know that but your always going to get a couple of bad eggs , just keep them under control and don't spoil it for the rest of us ….?

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Just now, tonyman said:

yes I know that but your always going to get a couple of bad eggs , just keep them under control and don't spoil it for the rest of us ….?

Shouldn't people be able to control themselves - why should it be down to us (assuming you mean the mods) to keep others under control - surely people should be able to excerceise their own restraint?  Perhaps you should be taking that up with the people who have spoiled it for you

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1 hour ago, The Pom Queen said:

I don’t expect it to be sweet and fluffy Tulip but I would hope people could discuss matters without the personal  attacks that happen. In regards to posts we have been accused of allowing racist posts and received constant abuse and reports from two particular members. I had a conversation with the NIS of the AHRC this week (seen as we keep getting threats to be reported to them) and i am perfectly happy with their response. 
‘Members never just discuss the subject it just becomes a point score between them. 
‘This month has been the worst we have seen in a long time for personal attacks, duplicate accounts, pm’s sent to members with threats, and the abuse/language that was sent to moderators which I can’t repeat with one threat saying they knew where a mod worked etc. These left two mods on the verge of stepping down and one seeking legal action. 

Now I’m sorry but none of the above is banter or having a few drinks down the pub with a mate. 
‘I agree that people should be able to hold a reasonable discussion, yes, sometimes heated, without having to get personal, threaten moderators so they don’t feel safe in their own home or threaten to report the forum to XYZ authorities if they don’t get their own way. 
Now how on earth we do this @Tulip1 I’ve no idea.  Ali started a thread whilst I was in hospital asking for help from members and we all remember how that turned out for her. 
So at the moment, I am trying to sort out some guidelines and rules for the forum and until then we have certain members posts on moderated.  I can assure you from what I have seen 99% of content is getting through and it is mainly  posts that have personal attacks in or racist, political, religious new threads we have been holding back. In regards to Newjez and PB I have no idea where they are. I will personally check their accounts later though as sometimes points don’t drop off manually and unless we check them they create an ongoing ban. This would need to be something Cerberus our other admin sorts because I don’t have access.

 

I am almost beyond words reading some of the above, I know I have posted from time to time asking other posters to try and respect each other, as I got so fed up with the way thread after thread descended into who could post the most insults  and pathetic point scoring, but I had no idea how low some posters had sunk, and that mods have been insulted or threatened. 

Reading the above I’m not sure I want to remain on PIO, I’m not sweet and fluffy, but I do have standards which it appears some posters are completely lacking. what some posters refer to as ‘banter’ was anything but, but as I mentioned it does depend on your individual standards as to what is acceptable. 

CTF has lost so many posters, for various reasons, but I’m sure we used to be able to discuss all sorts of topics in a rational sometimes robust way,, often with opposite views, we had many times we have laughed together, supported each other, but I thought we respected each other. Obviously I was wrong.

I wish I had some useful ideas for guidelines PQ, I hope that CTF can continue as it has been great fun to be part of over the years, but posters must in the future learn where to draw the line between what is or isn’t acceptable on a forum, or they aren’t welcome.

xM

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8 hours ago, tonyman said:

yes its gone quiet and a little boring atm , I have to admit the thought of new threads being moderated doesn't appeal to me , at the end of the day its common sense , we all know how far to push the buttons but would be good to keep it fun with banter ……..

But that's the problem tonyman, you may know how far to push the buttons, but there are other people don't know when to stop.  

And it's like TPQ said - things get heated at the pub, but at some point, you all slap each other on the back, buy each other a beer and everybody goes home happy.   Here, there's no way to put a lid on it - the "banter" just escalates and escalates for days and then carries over from thread to thread. Any ideas how to solve that?

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Scot by birth, emigrated 1985 | Aussie husband applied UK spouse visa Jan 2015, granted March 2015, moved to UK May 2015 | Returned to Oz June 2016

"The stranger who comes home does not make himself at home but makes home itself strange." -- Rainer Maria Rilke

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8 hours ago, ramot said:

 

I am almost beyond words reading some of the above, I know I have posted from time to time asking other posters to try and respect each other, as I got so fed up with the way thread after thread descended into who could post the most insults  and pathetic point scoring, but I had no idea how low some posters had sunk, and that mods have been insulted or threatened. 

Reading the above I’m not sure I want to remain on PIO, I’m not sweet and fluffy, but I do have standards which it appears some posters are completely lacking. what some posters refer to as ‘banter’ was anything but, but as I mentioned it does depend on your individual standards as to what is acceptable. 

CTF has lost so many posters, for various reasons, but I’m sure we used to be able to discuss all sorts of topics in a rational sometimes robust way,, often with opposite views, we had many times we have laughed together, supported each other, but I thought we respected each other. Obviously I was wrong.

I wish I had some useful ideas for guidelines PQ, I hope that CTF can continue as it has been great fun to be part of over the years, but posters must in the future learn where to draw the line between what is or isn’t acceptable on a forum, or they aren’t welcome.

xM

I can’t help feel part of that is aimed my way. When I posted my comments I, like most I assume, had no idea people were behaving in the most disgusting way towards the lovely people who give their time running this site. Had I known I would have mentioned that to say the least and my post would have been worded differently. I couldn’t mention what I didn’t know about.   All I knew was that people had been reporting things far too often and the mods were spending too much time on it. I was saying those people needed to get a grip. I was definitely not saying or suggesting the behaviour that I now know they were displaying was ok. As for my standards, they are exceptionally high. 

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