Jump to content

You're currently viewing the forum as a Guest
register-now-button_orig.png
and join in with discussions   
ask migration questions
message other members

..and much much more!

Guest t'n'g

unhappy!!! whats the right thing to do!!!!

Recommended Posts

Guest t'n'g

hi Everyone,

 

I know i have spoke to some of you about this and it looks like i am going to be a typical pingpong pom!! but i am soooo sad, i will start by telling you situation.

Moved to Melbourne in 2002 and after 3 months realised Brighton was not our area to live as it was out of our price range and OH had not found work anyway, so moved down to the Mornington Peninsula where after a few years built our own house and lived happily for another 3 years. our children were 4 and 5 at the time so moving apart from the emotional side was relativly easy. Settling in was ok it took my OH a while to find work and he and i were always having conversations about work in UK compared to work in OZ (as i am sure alot of UK people have had the same conversations on here and in their homes!) I on the other hand fell into work really easy and we both have made alot of friends aussie and english .

I have been very lucky that my parents have been able to come over every year even though it is only for 3 weeks i know i am very blessed however other family members have not been able to due to financial reasons. I have been back twice (well three cause im here now!!). But usually about 3 or 4 times a year i always felt guilty about leaving them and missed the cousins growing up with each other missed my brother and sister as we are a close familyetc... Certainly everytime mom and dad go back i am miserable for at least two weeks and are on the pc looking at moving to Spain or moving back for a year!!

well last year my wish happened (positive thinking and all that!!) and we came back as OH was offered a job back in a skill that he had not been in for 6 years!!

so for the last year we have been in UK and I could go on and on about whats happened in the last year but wont bore you all if you arnt already!!! All my kids are in school and i have to say that it is fantastic, lovely rural school only 112 kids they are all really happy and do not want to return. OH contract finishes end of March flights are booked for 31st all my friends in oz are so excited about us returning all my friends and family from uk are sad!!! don't get me wrong my family are brill and back me up 100% but you know what i mean!!

Since i have been here i have definatly seen the uk in a different light and have appreciated it more but also miss elements of australia. Problem also lies that we never took our citizenship so really have to return by end of march otherwise we will not be able to take it for 2 more years!!

Aaaaahhhhh someone PLEASE wave a magic wand!!!

feels so much better to write all this down thanks for reading!!!

Trishaxxxx:arghh:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Trisha

Wow what a dilemma, personally I would be trying to get the citizenship, how long have you to go?

Once you have this for you and the children you can go wherever you want. Remember the saying home is where the heart is and you have to go where you feel the happiest if you are happy the children will be to.


If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future. If you are at peace you are living in the present.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest t'n'g

thanks m2m yes i agree. we would be silly to lose our chance of citizenship but if the uk is where i/we want to be i dont want to drag the kids back to oz for 3-6 months and then back here again, i dont think my older one would cope or me!!!Also i know that we will go back and settle right back in again and for me to have those same feelings 3 or 4 times a year!! But my OH and i are actually talking again(these mood swings!!)and the other option is for just hime to go back get the citizenship, the kidsautomatically get it and hopefully i would get it on a spouses visa? i dont know i havent looked into that bit yet.

You are totally right though that the kids are happy if we are happy and i know they will settle anywhere even though they are protesting a bout going back.

Trishaxx

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

What a shame that you have to go back huh? You dont know what you've got til it's gone. It's a pity when the kids are having a good time and you are appreciating what the UK has to offer but I guess if you have to go back for work you have to go back for work. I suppose the citizenship thing is a belt and braces safety net that makes sense. Next, take the Tatts lotto option - that's usually my solution to all worries.:hug:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest t'n'g
What a shame that you have to go back huh? You dont know what you've got til it's gone. It's a pity when the kids are having a good time and you are appreciating what the UK has to offer but I guess if you have to go back for work you have to go back for work. I suppose the citizenship thing is a belt and braces safety net that makes sense. Next, take the Tatts lotto option - that's usually my solution to all worries.:hug:

 

Thanks lol been doing lotto for 6 years whilst in oz to get family out there!! Mom insists that she is going to win the Euro lottery on Friday though so watch this space.

Actually we have no work to go to back in oz so work is not an issue.... you are narrowing it down for me!!!!

Trisha

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know how you feel about having the pull of 2 places, there is ups and downs and good and bad for both. We came back from melb a few years ago and always think would we have been better staying. ?? Were going to go back but houses fell in price bla bla. any ho we just think there was stress between us and getting on with life here means less stress, but thats just us. My 9 year old soo happy in her small school here and we have a nice home and afford nice holidays. I had mood swings over there and compared and moaned but see it great when not there!!! We have family taking kids we go away fro the weekends. Family love the kids so much i dont think could do it to them. If its not broke don,t fix it , if life is good then you may regret changing it. crysal balls we all need ha good luck with it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest t'n'g

thats how i think i will feel if we stay in uk, i will always wonder what kind of life we would be having in Oz what high schools kids would be at etc... OH is not close to his family so its not such an issue for him. My parents think it would be a good idea to go back for 3 months all get our citizenship, sell the house,car etc.. then come back, but i think that it would be quite hard on the kids and i also think we may settle again!!!.

 

Anybody know out there how long it takes to take test and then obtain citizenship?

 

How long did you stay in Melb for?

Trisha

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest treesea

Three to six months will go by in a flash. After being so long in Australia already, citizenship is worth making the sacrifice for, imho. My OH prefers Australia to here and would like to go back at some stage. I can't see it happening, because my children refuse to leave and say things to him like "are you going alone, then?" But at least we are all Australian citizens, so if ever we did feel like moving back to Australia, it's just a matter of jumping on a flight. It is worth it to get citizenship. From what I have read on this forum, getting a visa costs an arm and a leg and then some.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Could you leave the kids with the rellies for a little while and you both come back, do the citizen thing and then go home again? If it was only a matter of a month or two you could perhaps manage that.

 

Remember that many Aussie kids cant wait to escape once they get to the end of school and there is no guarantee that your kids will end up here anyway. The two places are always going to be different and you cant live in both of them unfortunately.

 

Bottom line for me at this time would be - where is it going to be easier to find work????

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest Alecjones

Hi Trisha

I have been like you for the past 36 years you just never seam to settle down , so in April we are going to uk for 5 weeks to have a look around vist old friends may be it will help us with uk or aus ?, but which ever way we go it will be our one and only as we are getting a bit long in the tooth, our childern are in there late 30s so no problem with young uns only grandchildren, i think aus is a good place to bring your childern up with the warmer weather , good luck .

 

Reards Alec

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest t'n'g
Three to six months will go by in a flash. After being so long in Australia already, citizenship is worth making the sacrifice for, imho. My OH prefers Australia to here and would like to go back at some stage. I can't see it happening, because my children refuse to leave and say things to him like "are you going alone, then?" But at least we are all Australian citizens, so if ever we did feel like moving back to Australia, it's just a matter of jumping on a flight. It is worth it to get citizenship. From what I have read on this forum, getting a visa costs an arm and a leg and then some.

 

Certainly agree with you that we DO need to get our citizenship as i look back to the trials and tribulations of getting our visas (and money) and think how lucky we were to get it , and of course having 6 great years over there. lol that is exactly what my kids say to my hubbie!! maybe just send OH back!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest t'n'g
Could you leave the kids with the rellies for a little while and you both come back, do the citizen thing and then go home again? If it was only a matter of a month or two you could perhaps manage that.

 

Remember that many Aussie kids cant wait to escape once they get to the end of school and there is no guarantee that your kids will end up here anyway. The two places are always going to be different and you cant live in both of them unfortunately.

 

Bottom line for me at this time would be - where is it going to be easier to find work????

 

Thought about that but could not leave them that long. Its funny but that is what goes through my head is that you can guarantee that one of my kids will do what i did to my parents and up and leave to another country when they are older!! But hey hopefully by then they will have invented getting from oz to uk in an hour!!!

:wacko:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest t'n'g
Hi Trisha

I have been like you for the past 36 years you just never seam to settle down , so in April we are going to uk for 5 weeks to have a look around vist old friends may be it will help us with uk or aus ?, but which ever way we go it will be our one and only as we are getting a bit long in the tooth, our childern are in there late 30s so no problem with young uns only grandchildren, i think aus is a good place to bring your childern up with the warmer weather , good luck .

 

Reards Alec

 

wow i cannot believe you have been over there so long and are still thinking of coming back. i think it shows that in some stage of an 'immigrants' life they still want to return to their roots!

Best of luck with whatever happens and have agreat holiday it is just getting lighter over here!!

trisha

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×