Guest itskaren Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 I would like to gain some opinions please from Psych nurses. We are going back to the UK for 3 weeks at Chritmas and will be staying with my parents in law. My mother in law has dementia (MMSE 3/30) lives at home with her husband who is 80. She really needs specialist care but the husbnd refuses to put her in a home so he locks her in the bedroom for most of the time if he needs to do gardening etc as she wonders for miles out of the home. (I know appalling but nothing we can do. consultant knows about it). Anyway, she keeps asking about her mother and father (both died 30 years ago) Now I have been told 2 different things that 1. They should be brought to reality ie. 'Your parents are dead' or 2. ' Oh, they'll be back soon just nipped to the shop' or words to that effect. What is the current trail of thought? any help would be greatly appreciated. karen
Petals Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 I am not a nurse but my mil had it and last time we visited her she thought my husband was her brother and we just went a long with it as it was too distressing to try and tell her no. I know they play music and things from the era that the people can remember in some homes and they are very happy then. :smile:
Guest driver_diver Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 can i point you in the direction of the alzheimers society, im sure they have a website with useful info on the net.
Guest planky Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 ok...i specialise in acute elderly/medicine and I nurse lots of dementia patients..... we have had recent training from the alzheimers society...... it would be very traumatic for someone to be told that thay have lost someone they love over and over again...to relive the trauma daily would be horrific go with your number 2, keep her happy in her own little world, rather than distressed keep her occupied.....lots of things to rummage through we now have a rummage box on the ward and it prevent the wanderers from escaping etc things like handbags, purses, old photos....they love it.....even the men take to the handbags...its been a small thing to put into practice on the ward but the results from using a box like this have been amazing ok, i'll stop now before i bore you to death, but feel free to pm me for a chat alison
Guest JoanneHattersley Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 I work with Dementias. I have a resident pretty much the same as that! We call it "creative speaking!". If you tell someone with dementia that their husband is dead, then everytime you tell them it is as if they are hearing it for the first time. NO DONT GO THERE! Dont put them through it. It doesnt help and will distress everyone around you. I tell my resident that "he is being looked after and will pick you up tomorrow" By tomorrow she has no idea what has been said the day before but she is happy as she thinking her husband is coming. Which would you rather have? Upset person or happy person taht you might have to tell a white lie to occasionally?????
Guest JoanneHattersley Posted October 7, 2008 Posted October 7, 2008 Ali, I think we were typing at the same time! On the same wavelength too!!!
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