Guest Andy Chapman Posted September 30, 2008 Share Posted September 30, 2008 Holiday man "declared dead" A man has returned from an extended holiday to find that loads of his mates have been mourning his death. The confusion began in June when Michael O'Neill, from Middlesbrough, set-off for Australia to stay with a friend. It was a last minute decision, so he forgot to let people know. Mr O'Neill's neighbours grew worried about his disappearance, reports the Daily Telegraph, so eventually they contacted the police. Officers broke into the 49-year-old's flat, but could find no evidence of his whereabouts. Then, last week, his friends thought their fears had been confirmed when a family announcement was made in a local newspaper. By coincidence, it reported the death of another Michael O'Neill from Middlesbrough. Both men were a similar age - the late Mr O'Neill was 50 - and both have brothers named Kevin and Terry. The living Mr O'Neill said: "I went out on June 2 to stay with a friend and when I got back last Monday I found my door had been smashed in! "My neighbours thought I had died so they got in touch with police who came and broke the door down. "Everywhere I am going, people I know are grabbing hold of my hand, saying 'I thought you were dead! They can't believe it's me and I'm still alive." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted October 3, 2008 Share Posted October 3, 2008 Couple too heavy for plane to take off.....:skeptical: A couple who weighed 38 stone between them were told they were too heavy for their plane to take off. Alan Coupe and his wife Jan were approached by a stewardess while their plane was still on the runway and asked to move to help the aircraft get off the ground. Mr Coupe, who weighed 20 stone, moved to the front of the aircraft to even out the weight and the plane took off. The embarrassment of the incident, which took place in Southampton in 2005, led the couple to begin a drastic diet and the pair have since lost 12st 7lb between them. They were on their way to Guernsey for a week's holiday with their son Chris when the incident happened. Mrs Coupe, 49, who runs a bed and breakfast business with her husband in Stubbington, Hampshire, said: "We couldn't believe that we were too heavy for the plane to take off. "The stewardess asked one of us to get up and move to the front, so Alan volunteered to move which I was thankful about as I was so embarrassed I just couldn't look up." The couple, who had settled into a routine of having takeaways and eating very late at night, joined a slimming club and turned to pasta, vegetable curries or steak salads. Now Mrs Coupe, who also suffers from multiple sclerosis, has lost 6st 5lb and her 54-year-old husband 5st 13lb. She said: "I don't feel embarrassed about getting on a plane anymore - we all feel so great we could fly around the world now without a hitch." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted October 6, 2008 Share Posted October 6, 2008 WHAT NEXT, A MCSPACESTATION FLY BY? The Irish Times reported December 4, 1996, McDonald's Corporation had opened a new restaurant that week at the Swedish ski resort of Lindvallen, northwest of Stockholm. Naming it McSki, McDonald's proclaimed it the world's first "ski through" restaurant. HE'D SMARTLY PACKED HIS GOLDEN PARACHUTE, EARLY By October of 2000, it was determined the CEO of Lucent Technologies, Richard McGinn, had failed to reach promised financial targets, with the company admitting earnings had been greatly exaggerated. This started an investigation by the SEC, way too late. In January 2002, 16,000 workers were laid off. What about the poor CEO McGinn? He took his $12.5 million in cash and stock, then continued to work at his other job, on the audit committee of American Express. AT TIMES LIKE THESE SNAKES GET "THEIR LEGS PULLED" The first thing a red-sided garter snake (thamnophis sirtalis parietalis) does upon awakening from 8 months of hibernation is look for female snakes to mate with. Soon as he spots one, the lusty serpent intermingles around her body until they roll together to form a tight-stitched ball. When females are scarce, some male snakes will hide in the grass, then act female. The original lusty male will try and have sex with that male until he wears him out. Then, and only then, will the phony female crawl away, hopefully to ecstasy, with one less male to compete with. (While, all the while, probably denying his enjoyment of bi-sexuality?) FOR MANY, THIS SHOT WAS DEADLY In a national speech in 1976, U.S. President Gerald Ford encouraged all citizens to, "Get your swine flu immunization." With this encouragement, from Ford and others, one in four Americans did. But an immunopathological reaction caused some 500 who took the shot to develop Guillain-Barre syndrome, resulting in the deaths of 25 people from severe pulmonary complications. That is more dead than killed by the virus itself. WHY DIDN'T THEY RECORD HIS BIRTH IN THEIR FAMILY BIBLE? The idea of using Jesus Christ's birthday to start calendars with A.D. (Anno Domini) didn't begin until approximately 525 years after his death. While generally believed and accepted he began his ministry around age 30, the actual years of his life are still argued. Best guess from many researchers, Jesus was born between the years of 7 and 2 B.C., his death occurring between 26 and 36 A.D. This means The Crucifixion occurred while he was between the ages of 28 to 43. LET'S HOPE THEY TOOK A BITE OUT OF HIS BILL, OVER THIS The Associated Press reports doctors at a Wellington, New Zealand, hospital operated on an 81-year-old man in February of 2005, and during that procedure lost the patient's false teeth. After the operation, and after the patient complained of severe pain, a laryngoscope down his throat found the lost teeth immediately. WORTH ITS WEIGHT IN GOLD? NOPE, MUCH MORE THAN THAT There are 117 elements on the Periodic Table of Elements, with the most expensive of the lot probably being protactinium. This element is both rare and hard to isolate. In 1961, the British government captured 125 grams of protactinium from 60 tons of material, costing about $500,000 US to extract. That made the value of this element about $4,000 US per gram (0.035274 oz). There are currently no uses for protactinium, other than in scientific research. In addition to being scarce, it's highly radioactive and very toxic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Flinns Posted October 6, 2008 Share Posted October 6, 2008 When I was about 7 years old my mother took me and my younger brother up to Scotland to live with my dad. They were seperated at the time and he wasn't paying any maintenance. She hadn't told us or anyone else (school etc.) that she was doing it and left us with him for about 18 months before just as unexpectedly turning up in Scotland (while my dad was out) and bringing us back down to England. I remember my first day back at school how all of my old school friends were shocked to see me. It turned out that about the time when we 'disappeared' to Scotland there had been a trolly bus accident in which a number of people had been killed. Naturally, people put two and two together and the rumours went around that it had been me and my brother. I am happy to report that the rumours were a little wide of the mark! :shocked: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest WARDStoOZ Posted October 6, 2008 Share Posted October 6, 2008 Lol, as if they thought that man was dead! I'm glad the couple lost the weight! Regards, Dan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Angie*mark Posted October 6, 2008 Share Posted October 6, 2008 My OH Mark was told on friday that a good mate of his died, he was one of the ones involved in the jetski accident that was on the news and in the papers......well he got a phonecall today to say that he is alive................we were stunned........went through the grieving process mark was so upset and now well he's ecstatic but it's a strange feeling to be told a mate has died and then find out he is alive and kicking. We're just so thankful that he is ok and we'll get to see him again it's the best news we've had this year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted October 7, 2008 Share Posted October 7, 2008 Python tried to eat keeper's head A zoo owner had to be rescued in Germany when a 12ft snake began trying to eat her head. Renate Klosse was cleaning its cage when the nine-stone tiger python named Antonia clamped its jaws on her face. She tried to relieve the pressure from its 70 teeth by sticking her thumbs into its jawbone, reports The Sun. Colleagues sprayed it with hoses until it slithered off at Uhldingen Zoo near Stuttgart. Renate was treated for bites and shock. A police spokeswoman said: "Its jaws opened so wide that it was able to completely cover the woman's face." Python expert Jan Knoll explained: "Pressure on the jaw would have given the reptile pain. The water would have made it lose its sense of smell and disorientate it." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted October 11, 2008 Share Posted October 11, 2008 Gardener told to take down barbed wire to protect thieves A gardener who put up barbed wire to protect his allotment from thieves has been ordered to take it down in case intruders hurt themselves. Bill Malcolm, 61, was told to "remove it on health and safety grounds" by the local council which owns the allotments in Marlbrook, Worcestershire. He erected the deterrent after thieves struck three times in four months, stealing more than £300 worth of spades, forks, hoes and wrecking his potato patch in the process. Mr Malcolm said: "It's an absolutely ridiculous situation, all I wanted was to protect my property but the wire had to go in case a thief scratched himself. "I told them to let the thief sue me so at least that way I would know who was breaking into my allotment but everything I said fell on deaf ears. "The barbed wire was a single strand and ringing my property only. It was just three foot high and wasn't as though I'd dug a moat filled with piranha and erected six foot iron railings." A spokesman for Bromsgrove District Council said: "With regard to the barbed wire, we are obliged to request its removal or remove it on health and safety grounds to the general public, as this is a liability issue." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted October 16, 2008 Share Posted October 16, 2008 Burglar got stuck in lift.........:mask: A German thief was sunk after he got stuck in the lift of an office block he'd just burgled. Heinrich Klopp, 27, had raided an office on the sixth floor, taking computers, mobile phones and other electronic goods. He decided to take the lift down because his bag of loot was too heavy for him to carry down flights of stairs to a getaway car. But he was forced to call the fire brigade when he was trapped between floors. Firemen in the German capital Berlin spotted four laptops on the lift floor and called police who arrested Klopp and later charged him with theft. "I nearly got away with it until the lift broke. I had no other option but to call for help," he confessed. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted October 26, 2008 Share Posted October 26, 2008 Woman arrested for killing virtual husband A Japanese woman has been arrested after she allegedly killed her virtual husband in an online game. The 43 year old was apparently furious at finding herself suddenly divorced in the game Maplestory, reports the BBC. Police say she illegally accessed login details of the man playing her virtual husband, and killed off his character. The woman, a piano teacher, is in jail in Sapporo waiting to learn if she faces charges of illegally accessing a computer and manipulating data. She was taken to Sapporo - where her "husband", a 33-year-old office worker lives - from her home in Miyazaki 620 miles away. If charged with the offences, and convicted, she faces up to five years in prison and a fine of up to $5,000. A Sapporo police official said the woman had used the man's ID and password to log into the game last May to carry out the virtual murder. "I was suddenly divorced, without a word of warning. That made me so angry," she was quoted by the official as telling investigators. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted November 7, 2008 Share Posted November 7, 2008 A MILK OF HUMAN KINDNESS FOR A MOTHER DUCK Police officer Ray Peterson was standing on a Vancouver, Canada, street when he was surprised to look down and see a duck pulling on his pant's cuff. That duck was a mother insisting he follow her a few feet to a sewer grating, where her young ducklings had fallen through. She needed help, and apparently knew where to get it. Officer Peterson immediately requested a tow truck to raise the heavy grate, and eight small ducklings were scooped to safety. THE SMALLEST OF THE SMALL Found only in the Karmhanaburi Province in Western Thailand, the bumblebee bat ((Craseonycteris thonglongyai - not discovered until 1974) is the smallest mammal known. With total body weight about the same as a U.S. dime, this bat's head averages 11mm (0.433070 inches) in diameter. TOO BAD IT WASN'T A CAR AD A Scranton, Pennsylvania, roadside billboard bragged, "Bring in this ad and you'll get a free pair of shoes." This caused three men to tear down the fourteen-by-forty-eight foot sign and take it to the Shoestrings boutique, where the owner did accept the huge coupon in exchange for, not one, but three pairs of new shoes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted November 14, 2008 Share Posted November 14, 2008 LESS DONUTS, MORE EXERCISE, PERHAPS? On August 2, 2008, The Dallas Morning News reported Ft. Worth police had been unsuccessful in their attempt to arrest two men suspected of stealing wheels from a trailer park. During a foot chase, the suspects jumped into the Trinity River and escaped, while 4 police officers were taken to a local hospital complaining of heat exhaustion. HE SAID THAT "BIG-BOOM" STUFF DIDN'T WORK In 1944, U.S. President Harry Truman recruited Admiral Daniel Leathy (1875-1959) to advise him during the American atom bomb project, which ultimately helped much in ending World War II. But, in Admiral Leathy's opinion: "The bomb will never explode. I am saying this as an expert on the subject." AND HOW DO YOU SPELL W-O-R-K-M-A-N-'S C-O-M-P? Hoping to build a stronger team spirit, Burger King management sent more than one-hundred employees to an exercise, where they walked over a bed of hot coals bare footed. This caused twelve participants to be taken to hospital, there to be treated for first and second-degree burns to the soles of their feet. Some required wheelchairs until they were able to walk again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mongrel Posted November 14, 2008 Share Posted November 14, 2008 Holiday man "declared dead" A man has returned from an extended holiday to find that loads of his mates have been mourning his death. The confusion began in June when Michael O'Neill, from Middlesbrough, set-off for Australia to stay with a friend. It was a last minute decision, so he forgot to let people know. Mr O'Neill's neighbours grew worried about his disappearance, reports the Daily Telegraph, so eventually they contacted the police. Officers broke into the 49-year-old's flat, but could find no evidence of his whereabouts. Then, last week, his friends thought their fears had been confirmed when a family announcement was made in a local newspaper. By coincidence, it reported the death of another Michael O'Neill from Middlesbrough. Both men were a similar age - the late Mr O'Neill was 50 - and both have brothers named Kevin and Terry. The living Mr O'Neill said: "I went out on June 2 to stay with a friend and when I got back last Monday I found my door had been smashed in! "My neighbours thought I had died so they got in touch with police who came and broke the door down. "Everywhere I am going, people I know are grabbing hold of my hand, saying 'I thought you were dead! They can't believe it's me and I'm still alive." Prob went to Perth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted November 22, 2008 Share Posted November 22, 2008 Get out your paranoia response kits -- a kitten with two heads has been born in Western Australia. Vet George Huber and his nurse Louisa Burgess delivered the grey and white double-face feline at the Swan Veterinary Clinic in Perth. The kitten was born along with two others who did not have any deformities. Animal lovers need not worry -- the kitten is in a healthy condition. While it is fragile, and smaller than a human hand, it/they (?) eats normally through one mouth and can miaow through both at once. "I have seen cats with two tails and extra legs, but not this," Burgess told the website inmycommunity.com.au, where the strange news was announced. "It has a full tummy and it survived the night so that is a good sign... it seems content, it meows and purrs." About one in a million cats are born with two faces, according to The Times. The kitten's owners plan to keep the unusual feline, and say they are planning on calling it either Mr Men or Quasi Modo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted November 22, 2008 Share Posted November 22, 2008 Sadly the little moggy passed away this afternoon but made headlines throughout the world RIP little kitty Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted November 26, 2008 Share Posted November 26, 2008 ONLY "HAD IT HIS WAY" ON THE MAINLAND Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821), who conquered most of all Europe, was born on an island (Corsica), exiled to an island (Elba), died on an island (St. Helena). TODAY'S BEER DRINKERS MIGHT PREFER "POOP LIGHT"? On the Scottish island of Orkney, archaeologists uncovered a 5,000 year old pub and brewery, along with an ancient recipe for brewing beer with animal dung. Merryn Dineley, of Manchester University, England, brewed a batch of beer using this Stone Age method, and said the brew was absolutely delicious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ozcans Posted November 26, 2008 Share Posted November 26, 2008 Talk about micro(be)-brewery! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted November 28, 2008 Share Posted November 28, 2008 GREEN SNOW? A MOOSE WITH BAD KIDNEYS, PERHAPS? In April 1953, a couple traveling near Mount Shasta, California, Mr. and Mrs. Milton Moyer, reported touching glowing green snow, which caused "a blistered, itchy rash" to form on their hands, arms and face. The ATF (Atomic Energy Commission) denied any link between this occurance and a recent A-bomb explosion in the nearby Nevada desert. (So?) HE SAVED HIS SON, AND FIXED THE AMBULANCE After West Yorkshire, England, auto mechanic Chris Wilkinson resusitated his two-year-old son back to breathing, the ambulance taking the small child to hospital quit running. Mr. Wilkins then stepped out, repaired the ambulance's accelerator cable, allowing his child to arrive for treatment, and all left happy. CHEWING ON BULLETS COULD CAUSE MORE THAN LEAD POISONING A safe container law in California makes it necessary to put warning labels on all packages containing lead. That's why boxes of bullets (which contain lead) carry this warning label: THIS PRODUCT CONTAINS LEAD AND MAY BE HAZARDOUS TO YOUR HEALTH. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted December 2, 2008 Share Posted December 2, 2008 JUSTICE IS BLIND, AND OFTEN DEAF Pratap Nayak, from Boudh district, in the Indian state of Orissa, was sentenced to prison for a murder he did not commit, and remained there 6-years until his name was cleared. Unfortunate for Mr. Nayak, a break-down in communications caused him to remain in jail an additional 8-years, before the error was found and he was released. Compensation for his "inconvenience" was awarded after the Orissa High Court upheld a petition, giving him 800,000 rupees (about $20,000 U.S., less than $1,450 a year). . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mongrel Posted December 2, 2008 Share Posted December 2, 2008 Talk about micro(be)-brewery! I was into home brew and got a recipe for a brew out of a book egyptian beer made with chicken bones its yonks old did not try it but I`d give it a go suppin this wombat piss here Mally Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ozcans Posted December 2, 2008 Share Posted December 2, 2008 I was into home brew and got a recipe for a brew out of a book egyptian beer made with chicken bones its yonks old did not try it but I`d give it a go suppin this wombat piss here Mally :biglaugh:LOL Talk about desperate times calling for........ well actually think I`d rather have the wombat`s piss!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mongrel Posted December 2, 2008 Share Posted December 2, 2008 :biglaugh:LOLTalk about desperate times calling for........ well actually think I`d rather have the wombat`s piss!!!! If it was fermented I would, better than this so called beeer Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Ozcans Posted December 2, 2008 Share Posted December 2, 2008 You must have a stomach and liver of steel! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mongrel Posted December 2, 2008 Share Posted December 2, 2008 You must have a stomach and liver of steel! Oh for a pint of real ale guinness will do at a pinch and the feral brewery is ok at the swan valley feral ?!!!!!! hope its not cats piss mally (Iron belly new name) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Andy Chapman Posted December 2, 2008 Share Posted December 2, 2008 300 flying foxes are rescued in storms Monday, December 1, 2008 300 flying foxes are rescued in storms The future of a colony of fruit bats has been put at risk after hundreds of pups were abandoned by their mothers in heavy storms. More than 300 infant grey-headed flying foxes are being cared for at a bat hospital since they were left to fend for themselves in the last week. Most are suffering from hypothermia and deydration, and many have been attacked by swarms of flies. . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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