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Does anyone regret bringing their kids up in Oz, if so why?

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No regrets at all.  Two sons born here.  As far as missing extended family   ..............  aunties, uncles, cousins etc   ...........   that never really applied because we are a very small family.  They only have two cousins.  Aunts and uncles scattered all over the world at one time.  Only one grandparent and she came here for months every 2 years.  They both enjoyed school - had a nice bunch of friends - went to uni.   Both met their partners here and now the four of them are living and working overseas.  They seem to be happy and well adjusted young men so no regrets.  

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1 hour ago, Toots said:

No regrets at all.  Two sons born here.  As far as missing extended family   ..............  aunties, uncles, cousins etc   ...........   that never really applied because we are a very small family.  They only have two cousins.  Aunts and uncles scattered all over the world at one time.  Only one grandparent and she came here for months every 2 years.  They both enjoyed school - had a nice bunch of friends - went to uni.   Both met their partners here and now the four of them are living and working overseas.  They seem to be happy and well adjusted young men so no regrets.  

I grew up in Oz. I never really appreciated what grand parents and uncles and cousins were, and how important they are.

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Nearly there! Don't drop the ball now guys! Vaccines are weeks away. Stay safe!

 

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Definitely not!  My daughter has a brilliant job, her own horse in the best agistment there is in the area, etc.  I came here at the age of 13 and I was chronically ill there, quickly sorted here.  

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Posted (edited)

It's such a difficult question to answer.   For people who migrated many years ago, when life was tough in the UK and people migrated to get cheaper housing, a better job and better pay, I doubt they'd have regrets, because they were able to provide their children with a better home, better food etc.  For those people, losing contact with extended family would be a price worth paying to see their children well-set-up in life. 

In the last twenty years or so,  a lot of migrants from the UK seem to have had a pretty good life already, and are moving because they want a change or fancy the weather or a new adventure, or prefer the lifestyle. For them it must be harder to answer the question. 

Of course, for you it must be a deep regret because you are so attached to your family.

Edited by Marisawright

Scot by birth, emigrated 1985 | Aussie husband applied UK spouse visa Jan 2015, granted March 2015, moved to UK May 2015 | Returned to Oz June 2016

"The stranger who comes home does not make himself at home but makes home itself strange." -- Rainer Maria Rilke

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4 minutes ago, Marisawright said:

It's such a difficult question to answer.   For people who migrated many years ago, when life was tough in the UK and people migrated to get cheaper housing, a better job and better pay, I doubt they'd have regrets, because they were able to provide their children with a better home, better food etc.  For those people, losing contact with extended family would be a price worth paying to see their children well-set-up in life. 

In the last twenty years or so,  a lot of migrants from the UK seem to have had a pretty good life already, and are moving because they want a change or fancy the weather or a new adventure, or prefer the lifestyle. For them it must be harder to answer the question. 

Of course, for you it must be a deep regret because you are so attached to your family.

I only moved here 21 years ago and have never ever regretted it once . Have a son and grandkids back in the UK and a large family of brothers and sisters and a dad but would never even consider going back . I had a good life back there but so much happier here . My husband who has been here 56  years from a kid even said he would never move back to UK . For us it just holds no appeal at all . For others its all they think of . 

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No regrets here either.  We only moved not quite 13 years ago and had a pretty good life in the UK but my OH wanted to move back to be near his family.  My kids have thrived here in a way I’m not sure they would have done in the UK. For me the whole extended family thing is over rated. We actually have more extended family here with my husbands family than we had in the UK but we don’t see many of his family very often.


Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving.

Dale Carnegie – 1888-1955, Author and Lecturer

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We moved 14 years ago with a 3 yr old and 8 yr old. We have no regrets what so ever about raising them here at all. They are both doing well and happy with their lives.

 Cal x


If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place...

If you get a chance,take it, If it changes your life,let it. Nobody said it would be easy they just said it would be worth it...

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None for us - we moved in 2007 with a 7 and 11 year old.  My daughter (now 26) has said that she has been glad to have had her teenage years here in Aus.  I think they would have done well in the UK, but here they've been afforded opportunities that they wouldn't have had (although it might have changed in the time we've been away).  The children did their keys for life (driving theory) whilst at school, my son got his skippers ticket as part of his outdoor education and went sailing for a week.  My daughter was accepted into a GATE program which they didn't have at the HS she started briefly before we came.


I just want PIO to be a happy place where people are nice to each other and unicorns poop rainbows

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I feel like we have just been unfortunate, everyone else seems to think it has been a good move for kids. I only have one daughter and i thought when she was about 8 that i didn't like how i saw the teens here, but family who live here where all convinced this would be better for her. She was a very timid and shy girl and would never put herself out there. She went to private school and got a good education but absolutely hated it but at the same time would not move schools, i tried to move her a few times. Because she found school so stressful has no thoughts on going to uni. She has had a job since leaving school but she could be doing so much better but i guess she is only 22 so there is time. She has been going to psychologists since about 15 , i feel i stuffed her up by having depression from homesickness, who knows, all she says is she is very angry! She was a delightful girl until about 17-18 then we started to have clashes alot. I find her way of thinking is nothing like the families and we always end up arguing, i now avoid talking most of the time. This makes my depression so much worse at times. I really regret bringing her up here i know back home we may not have agreed on things but at least i would have felt more grounded. I have just about give up tying to have a decent life here its just too hard! Been here over 30 years and wanted to go home for the past 15 years approx. 

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My sons say they had a great childhood but both have independently said they regretted growing up without having extended family around. The UK based one said, at first, that he wanted his kids to have the same Aussie childhood that he did but he seems very happy with the opportunities that his son has in UK and isn't thinking of coming back, ever. I don't suppose it's done  them much harm but I think the one who is still here in Australia might not have taken the path he did had we been in UK (self sufficient somewhat  hippy in the bush type) and would have a more productive life. He's the one who would now kill to go and live in UK because he hates the heat and, like me, is a magnet for all biting insects within 100 Miles (his ex would never let him leave with the kids). 

I suspect they would have been quite happy in either place. 

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23 hours ago, newjez said:

I grew up in Oz. I never really appreciated what grand parents and uncles and cousins were, and how important they are.

You are lucky you had them even if they were far away.  My sons never missed them because they never really had any close rellies.  My brother and sister both lived in different countries and their other auntie (OH's sister) had a job which took her to Europe a lot though she was mainly based in London.  Their only 2 cousins were born and brought up in Thailand and we did see a lot of them over the years.  We had good friends when the lads were growing up so they  looked upon them as aunties and uncles and the kids were all pretty close too.  

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1 hour ago, Toots said:

You are lucky you had them even if they were far away.  My sons never missed them because they never really had any close rellies.  My brother and sister both lived in different countries and their other auntie (OH's sister) had a job which took her to Europe a lot though she was mainly based in London.  Their only 2 cousins were born and brought up in Thailand and we did see a lot of them over the years.  We had good friends when the lads were growing up so they  looked upon them as aunties and uncles and the kids were all pretty close too.  

Christmas was always a quiet affair. 


Nearly there! Don't drop the ball now guys! Vaccines are weeks away. Stay safe!

 

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