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Fergie

Thinking of moving back to Uk

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@Fergie- so true! From the ‘Let’s not think about starting a business just in case we go back.....’ to the ‘I’m not going to bother with meaningful friendships.....’ and the ‘it’s not my forever home so I’m not going to spend too much on decorating it ...’ 14 years on!! Not just a UK thing either - a Kiwi friend has done exactly the same as she’s pined for NZ.

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1 hour ago, proud preston said:

@Fergie- so true! From the ‘Let’s not think about starting a business just in case we go back.....’ to the ‘I’m not going to bother with meaningful friendships.....’ and the ‘it’s not my forever home so I’m not going to spend too much on decorating it ...’ 14 years on!! Not just a UK thing either - a Kiwi friend has done exactly the same as she’s pined for NZ.

That is so sad.

It might have been so different if you had done all of those things you mentioned.

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I want it all, and I want it now.

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@Parley possibly - and it is such a waste to not ‘seize the day’. It’s not lost on me that only I can make the situation better rather than mope. 

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On 10/02/2021 at 14:27, Fergie said:

Hi Maryrose02

ive thought of all those scenarios,  but I’m thinking unless I give it a go I’ll never know.  Have you no preference to Uk or Australia?  Being back in Uk what are the things you loved or hated that you’d forgotten about while living in Oz? 
I actually live about an hours drive from my oldest 2, (they live closer to Brisbane) I live on mount tamborine ( you will know the mountain if you live in surfers) as it’s cooler, I hate the humidity and intense heat down there, lol.  So it’s not just a pop down the road, it’s always a pre arranged visit either way. Doesn’t stop us seeing each other a couple of times a month. It’s beautiful up here, but with the Uk it’s a longing I just can’t get away from,  it’s scary because it’s been going on so long, about 13 years actually, I’m concerned in my head the Uk is the answer to everything and Australia the reason for everything, if that makes sense. When you’ve  struggled  with something for so long, in the end you go round in circles, should we, shouldn’t we, what if’s, will we love it/ hate it. The kids, the NHS when we get old, what happens when we are to old to travel, what if we don’t go back and I regret it as I get older and leave it to late. It’s all swirling round in my head everyday for over a decade. Hence the anxiety etc

 

    .  

I guess my perspective has changed since my parents died. When they were alive I went back to England every two or three years and they came out to Australia regularly. I often thought about staying in England when I went back for my holidays but I never had the opportunity, or I suppose you could say that I never dared quit my job?!

Then I was made redundant and I did have the opportunity although I did not go back intending to stay as I had a one year round-the-world return ticket. Once I got back there the idea of staying gradually took hold. I got a job with Royal Mail, then they gave me some compulsory winter leave and I used my return ticket to go back to Sydney and rent my flat out. I got a single ticket back to the UK.

One of my childhood friends has been posting pictures of his walks in and around the village where grew up and I'd love to be doing those walks with him. I used to be out on my bike or walking almost every day when I was back in England and I've not been on a bike since I returned to OZ.

If you get the opportunity to go back to the UK and stay, then take it, although I would not recommend it during Covid! My friend's walks around the village are his only means of "escaping" the lock down. I dread the thought of another lock down living on my own. And if I did go back to the UK now I would be on my own. My parents were always there to welcome me, waiting at the airport, with a home from home.

I've been to Mount Tambourine but not during my present stint on the Gold Coast. A girl in lift told me she lived on "The Mountain!?"  What is it like living there? Do you need a car to get to the shops, restaurants, etc? What I love about Surfers is having almost everything I need within a few hundred metres of my home. 

I've been back in OZ for 12 years and not been back to England since. I still watch every Tottenham game and read the Daily Mail multiple times a day but I don't miss England any more, plus I have my two brothers here and no close family in England.

As I said, if you get the chance to go to the UK then do it! If you like it then stay. If you don't come back to OZ. What was that "blurb" about the NT?

"If you never never go, you'll never never know?"

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18 hours ago, bug family said:

written perfectly tea4too

Hiraeth .......Longing for my home land 😢

 

I've experienced that longing in both England and Australia depending on where I living.  My friend posting photographs of his walks around our childhood village but then when I'm in that village seeing the odd gum tree, though God knows how they came to be there.

Bluebells make me think of Jacaranda and vice versa.

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On 10/02/2021 at 15:29, Marisawright said:

The problem is that you are equally happy (or unhappy) in both countries, so your experirence isn't terribly relevant.  You've never experienced that deep, aching longing to be back "home" and frankly, in many of your posts, you seem to imply people who do feel that way are imagining things.  They're not. 

"Equally unhappy" in both countries? That is a good point especially if one's homesickness is not "cured" by going home. I don't discount the severity of homesickness and I've often experienced it myself but I also found that it's having my family around which is more important.

I would encourage anybody who is suffering from homesickness to go back and give it a shot living there permanently, but also be aware that going back for a holiday, especially in summer, is not the same as living there for good. 

Some people go back and love it whilst others realize that Australia is actually home, although they needed to go back to the UK to find that out,

I was happy living in the UK when my parents were alive. In fact I was happy after they died but ultimately I decided I preferred to be in Australia because my brothers are here. Had they both been in England then I probably would have stayed there too.

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