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38 minutes ago, Quoll said:

I don't, that's the trouble! I'm very Aussie when I'm there - even when I'm not there, so I'm told and I have an Australian accent and all. It's much more ephemeral than that. I was chatting to a NZ chap the other day on the top of Mt Ainslie. Lived in Australia for over 20 years and said he still doesn't feel at home - "the colours are all wrong"! I know just what he meant! 

Feelings are real, if it doesn’t feel right it’s not right.  Sometimes there’s nothing we can do about that. I remember watching a programme about ten pound poms and their experiences. Some loved their lives in Oz, some were in the middle, and some had never really felt at home. There was one old lady who had always wanted to return back to the UK but it never happened, not even for a holiday. She talked about the good life she’d had in Oz and her children had good lives but there was a hole that she just couldn't fill.  She’d made the decision she wanted the time she has left to be in England and she wanted to die there. Her children supported her as they knew she’d wanted that for as long as they could ever remember. The programme followed her back ‘home’ and to the place she had once lived. She stepped out of the car and cried uncontrollably and said she felt whole again.  Whilst Australia had been good to her and she had lived a good life it still wasn’t the life she wanted, you can’t change true feelings. 

Edited by Tulip1
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8 hours ago, Quoll said:

One of mine is in UK and the other would like to live in UK (hates the heat) but has kids and his ex wouldn’t let him take them with him! They’re both pretty fixed for a few years yet!  

Our younger one is in New York but he has managed a transfer to Bermuda.  Wonder if he will have a spare room for his old Mum.  🤔

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3 hours ago, Tulip1 said:

Feelings are real, if it doesn’t feel right it’s not right.  Sometimes there’s nothing we can do about that. I remember watching a programme about ten pound poms and their experiences. Some loved their lives in Oz, some were in the middle, and some had never really felt at home. There was one old lady who had always wanted to return back to the UK but it never happened, not even for a holiday. She talked about the good life she’d had in Oz and her children had good lives but there was a hole that she just couldn't fill.  She’d made the decision she wanted the time she has left to be in England and she wanted to die there. Her children supported her as they knew she’d wanted that for as long as they could ever remember. The programme followed her back ‘home’ and to the place she had once lived. She stepped out of the car and cried uncontrollably and said she felt whole again.  Whilst Australia had been good to her and she had lived a good life it still wasn’t the life she wanted, you can’t change true feelings. 

My husband's Mum never settled in Australia - she was very homesick.  They came to Australia in 1950 (I think) and life was pretty tough.  My husband and his sister were born here.  His Dad loved it though.  Long story short  .........  when OH's Dad died (he was only 42) his Mum went back to the UK soon afterwards with my husband and his little sister.  She very rarely talked about Australia and had a good job in London and managed to buy a house there.  OH always wanted to come back to Australia, though he is also very fond of the UK and his sister never came back to live here.  She has come on visits but said she prefers the UK.  

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1 hour ago, Toots said:

Our younger one is in New York but he has managed a transfer to Bermuda.  Wonder if he will have a spare room for his old Mum.  🤔

It's a small world!  I keep in touch with a woman I worked with in Liverpool (UK) in the late 1970's.  Her daughter has also been transferred to Bermuda.  My son and her daughter work for the same company (Deloittes).  

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18 hours ago, ali said:

To the OP:  I think it's good to know the potential pitfalls - we used to look for the reasons people went home and disregarded the ones were they couldn't find their favourite brand of juice or didn't like the journey to the airport - but did discuss what if one or both of us didn't like it and talked about that (the decision was that Aus was a big place and we'd try somewhere else).  I think the tone of some posts suggesting those pitfalls can be misunderstood and it's better to try not to read between imaginary lines when offering an opinion.  For me, I try to remember how excited and hopeful I was at the start of the journey and certainly responded better to considered post which gave a balanced view/ideas to consider. 

As a family, I'd like to think that had we stayed in the UK we'd have maintained the ok life we had there -  We lived in a nice area in the north west (don't buy into the 'if you live up north living in Aus is a step up just because where you're living must be a dump) - for us the move was a comparable one although our house/block is slightly bigger.  We've still managed to travel as a family and as a couple, we've saved money (some things are cheaper and some more expensive), we cut our cloth accordingly and have a good life.  Our children have thrived (as we hoped they would have done in the UK), the (public) education system hasn't let them down and perhaps aided my daughter more as her HS here had an academic extension programme which she got into which met her academic needs and by 23 she had her masters (and a hefty student loan - just like the UK).  Our son had the opportunity to do sailing and also obtained his skippers ticket (to drive a boat)  as part of the school curriculum (opportunities he wouldn't have had).

Is our life better here?  it's certainly different and we feel more content.  We have accessed a lot of different sporting activities and concerts than we did when we lived in the UK as the stadium/venues in the city are less than 30 mins away for us.  We do spend more time outside , even relaxing at home we eat outside often and spend time in the garden.  Last weekend, we had a impromptu picnic with friends by the river, there was a large group of teens having a get together without anyone wondering what they were up to or if there would be anti-social behaviour lol.  For me, these have been the little things that have been very different that what we did in the UK and lifestyle changes don't have to be major ones.

My advice for the OP - it's a long time to live with regrets - you won't know if it's for you unless you try.  As a family, you and your partner need to both be invested in it 100% - years on the forum have shown that if you're both not up for it, the stress of it all can put cracks into the best of relationships.  If you find it's not for you - you haven't 'failed' in the slightest, it's been an opportunity that you've taken and on to the next adventure.  Come with the knowledge that Australia is a totally different country (not England with sunshine), there will be things that are familiar and lots that isn't, don't expect things to click right away (it can take time) and forming friendships won't be instantaneous - just like the UK, they'll develop over time.  Australia isn't Utopia by any means, but it can offer you the lifestyle you're looking for.  We've been here 13 years now and haven't once regrated our move - it's been hard work at times re-establishing ourselves in a new country/making friends etc. .. but for us, it's been absolutely worth it.  

Thankfully it isn’t ‘England with sunshine’.  Look at your hobbies/sports/interests and see which state/territory suits.  And it takes many years to ‘settle’.  It isn’t going to happen in 3 months!

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15 minutes ago, Bulya said:

Thankfully it isn’t ‘England with sunshine’.  Look at your hobbies/sports/interests and see which state/territory suits.  And it takes many years to ‘settle’.  It isn’t going to happen in 3 months!

i really liked Australia from the get go but I felt really settled when we moved into our own house.  I didn't like renting at all.

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12 hours ago, Quoll said:

One of mine is in UK and the other would like to live in UK (hates the heat) but has kids and his ex wouldn’t let him take them with him! They’re both pretty fixed for a few years yet!  

Same in reverse for me Quoll, you can’t win can you. Two of ours have made Australia home after we moved here, they never settled back in England after the expat life in Asia. Our oldest spent less time there, and like yours, his wife will never leave England, so it won’t happen. 

I think I have had to make so many places and countries home, that I have been happy in Australia from day one. I’m lucky to have made good friends here, both expats and Australians, especially made welcome by our new ‘Bushy friends’ all ex farmers from out west Qld. Very special warm hearted people, fascinating how different our lives have been, but enjoy each other’s company with plenty of laughter.

Just had an Australian friend from Brunei days call in unexpectedly this morning, what fun catching up, so I count myself lucky to have all sorts of friends, 

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Wherever you move in the World, give yourselves at least two years to say 'yay' or 'nay'.

To the OP; it was a very broad request. The first thing to ask would be "Have we a cat in hell's chance of emigrating?" as it's very, very difficult and costly to get into Australia permanently. Maybe first you should tell us about your qualifications and such and then maybe we could advise you.

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On 22/01/2020 at 07:21, Bobj said:

Mate! Love that attitude. Been in Australia for over 55 years and still having an outdoors lifestyle at age 79...Do what you and your partner feel you should do. Be positive in your outlook. And to hell with the negative comments. 😉 I can honestly say that I’ve had a fabulous life here.

And, enjoy your lives together

Cheers, Bobj.

PS. In all my time in Australia, I have only lived in cities for about 2 years, My time has been spent in The Kimberlies, northern New England and now in the Whitsunday/ Mackay Region.

 

 

Agree Bobj, The negative comments are consistently flung by the usual suspects. Its as though only Australia has flies, for goodness sake. Bushfires of sufficient scale to inflict poor air quality are absolutley rare.

Take the advice of the agents on here, and also this advice. Warts and all Australia offers monumentally greater opportunities for a better life. 

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On 01/02/2020 at 15:57, ali said:

As a family, I'd like to think that had we stayed in the UK we'd have maintained the ok life we had there -  We lived in a nice area in the north west (don't buy into the 'if you live up north living in Aus is a step up just because where you're living must be a dump) - for us the move was a comparable one although our house/block is slightly bigger.  We've still managed to travel as a family and as a couple, we've saved money (some things are cheaper and some more expensive), we cut our cloth accordingly and have a good life.  Our children have thrived (as we hoped they would have done in the UK), the (public) education system hasn't let them down and perhaps aided my daughter more as her HS here had an academic extension programme which she got into which met her academic needs and by 23 she had her masters (and a hefty student loan - just like the UK).  Our son had the opportunity to do sailing and also obtained his skippers ticket (to drive a boat)  as part of the school curriculum (opportunities he wouldn't have had).

Is our life better here?  it's certainly different and we feel more content.  We have accessed a lot of different sporting activities and concerts than we did when we lived in the UK as the stadium/venues in the city are less than 30 mins away for us.  We do spend more time outside , even relaxing at home we eat outside often and spend time in the garden.  Last weekend, we had a impromptu picnic with friends by the river, there was a large group of teens having a get together without anyone wondering what they were up to or if there would be anti-social behaviour lol.  For me, these have been the little things that have been very different that what we did in the UK and lifestyle changes don't have to be major ones.

My advice for the OP - it's a long time to live with regrets - you won't know if it's for you unless you try.  As a family, you and your partner need to both be invested in it 100% - years on the forum have shown that if you're both not up for it, the stress of it all can put cracks into the best of relationships.  If you find it's not for you - you haven't 'failed' in the slightest, it's been an opportunity that you've taken and on to the next adventure.  Come with the knowledge that Australia is a totally different country (not England with sunshine), there will be things that are familiar and lots that isn't, don't expect things to click right away (it can take time) and forming friendships won't be instantaneous - just like the UK, they'll develop over time.  Australia isn't Utopia by any means, but it can offer you the lifestyle you're looking for.  We've been here 13 years now and haven't once regrated our move - it's been hard work at times re-establishing ourselves in a new country/making friends etc. .. but for us, it's been absolutely worth it.  

100% this.

I wouldn't have been as articulate, but this is the same for us, other than the specific details. We had the very same conversation last night on the deck with the in laws, who are on their way back to the UK after spending 4 months with us. We had an ok life in the UK, but had a scratch to itch and we and the kids appear to be thriving, and accessing more activities and more experiences than we would have had in the UK, so no regrets whatsoever. Is our life better? No idea what that means or how you could really measure it, but we are happy where we are now and feel at home. So we are glad we tried.

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