Traveling back to the UK with a 9 month old

[Danny842003]

We’re about to have our first child anytime now. As none of my family live here and my grandparents aren’t getting any younger were looking at travelling back next June whilst my wife is still on maternity leave. 

What advice do people have for getting through these 24 hours of hell? My wife thinks a 9 month old is going to be too big to go in one of those cots they have on the plane bulkhead. Do we need to get a third seat or should we just bite the bullet and get a third seat for our sanity?

I think on the way out we may have a 48 hour stopover but because of slack of time on the holiday we will probably do the return journey in one  hit. 

[Marisawright]

My immediate reaction is, if the holiday is so short that you can't afford a stopover, don't do it.   Could you get some unpaid leave from your work so you could extend the holiday a bit and fit in a stopover?

It doesn't have to be 48 hours.  The big airports like Singapore and KL have good transit hotels inside the airport.  You don't even have to go through customs.   If you can get a stopover of 8 to 10 hours, you can be booked into the hotel within half an hour of getting off the plane, have a sleep, stretch your legs, let the baby play etc.    They are not always cheap but I've always found it makes a world of difference to how I feel on arrival at the other end.

[ramot]

1 hour ago, Marisawright said:

My immediate reaction is, if the holiday is so short that you can't afford a stopover, don't do it.   Could you get some unpaid leave from your work so you could extend the holiday a bit and fit in a stopover?

It doesn't have to be 48 hours.  The big airports like Singapore and KL have good transit hotels inside the airport.  You don't even have to go through customs.   If you can get a stopover of 8 to 10 hours, you can be booked into the hotel within half an hour of getting off the plane, have a sleep, stretch your legs, let the baby play etc.    They are not always cheap but I've always found it makes a world of difference to how I feel on arrival at the other end.

I’ve stayed in both Dubai and Singapore airport hotels, and Both are fine. On arrival you usually have some one waiting to take you to check in for the next part of your flight, your hold luggage is tagged and taken, you only take your cabin luggage with you and then you go onto airside hotel. It’s seamless. As Marisa says, have a good sleep, or have a swim if you want to.

We stayed for 24 hours once in Dubai, and you can leave the airport as well if you want to. 

[Quoll]

Nah, just bite the bullet and do it. The bassinet on the bulkhead will probably be ok but take a sling just in case you need to walk the aisles with the baby. You don’t want your arms dropping off.  Travel light, sleep when you can, hopefully your wife will still be bf at the time, it’s a whole lot simpler than faffing around with bottles, be confident in your own parenting. It’s only 24 hours, get it all done in one hit. I did it with my kids at various ages and more recently with grandkids. Only one of the grandkids eschewed the bassinet but she was a kid who was a co-sleeper.  If you can travel while the baby is younger, you may find it marginally easier. 

[Wonderingaloud]

I’ve just done this with an 11 month old and a 5 year old! Stopped off in Dubai en route- best decision ever. But the times worked out for us-we landed at 2pm local time, so we had chance to wind down, have a swim and something to eat, hit the sack at 6pm and were up at 4am for our 7am flight to Manchester. Hotels are cheap in Dubai, you just need a clean air conditioned room. We deliberately chose a flight with a long connection and were willing to pay for a hotel but upon booking we were told we were eligible for ‘Dubai connect’ because our stopover was more than 8 hours and there was no sooner flight to Manchester. This meant we didn’t pay for a hotel, had a free shuttle bus to and from the airport, as well as meal vouchers courtesy of emirates.

Going back we just went for it and did the whole lot in one go- it was fine, but my Lo is breastfeeding. I can honestly say that breastfeeding was worth it’s weight in gold for this flight alone.

We were really messed up and jet lagged coming home (and were up for afew hours in the middle of the night for about 3 nights after). If I had to do it again I’d stopover coming back as well. 

The bulkhead seats were awesome- plenty of room so she could crawl about and play on the floor in front of us. The bassinet was huge but we flew with emirates and theres’ is up to age 2 or 14kgs (I think) which is pretty good. She slept fine in it going, I think the whirring and white noise helped. I personally wouldn’t buy a 3rd seat, your baby won’t sit in it, and will probably be crawling by then. He/she will be alright with the bassinet or get a carrier and they’ll sleep on you.

Take your own baby food, at 9months they’ll be on more than 4month purées which is all the baby food they had on the flight. 

Happy to chat if you have any other questions. 

 

[excitedbutterrified]

We have flown UK/ Oz and back with the following combinations of our kids ages :

• 4 month old
• 2 year old & 4 month old
• 3  & 1 year old
• 4 & 2 year old
• 6 & 4 year old 

Its never easy when they are young.  My advice is :

• Get the bassinet seat anyway, and try to use it. having just a little time not attached to your kid is bliss, and they will likely sleep better too. Even if you cant use it, you get a little extra space and your little one can play on the floor (if the flight attendants allow) Those are premium seats for a reason, so if you are eligible to have them for free, go for it. We took a perverse pleasure in watching the faces of people who had paid extra for the legroom realising they were sitting next to a baby for the next 14 hours (maybe we are a**holes).
• If you are going to stop halfway, make it a decent one, with a few days.  Our worst trip had a 1 night stop in Dubai, It didn't help jetlag (particularly for the kids) and we wish we had just got it all over with in one go. For us it just extended the pain, and we weren't in Dubai long enough to enjoy it. - we spent one night in a really nice hotel - and didnt sleep great, plus some hours in Dubai mall and went up the tower (which is worth it!) Either stop properly, and have a mini holiday - or don't stop. Since our trip with the long stopover, we try to have the shortest possible transfer time, 2 hours is plenty for us.
• Agree with Wonderingaloud , sort your own food out, the airline will give you baby food, but if your little one is fussy, there ain't many other options once in the air, so sort something you know they will eat in advance, lots of snacks and their favorites to shut them up when crying. Make sure you dispose of all your non allowed food on the plane when you return to oz as the customs people will make you bin it anyway and aren't as nice!
• On the plane, try not to be too self conscious when your child cries (and they will), most people are generally quite generous and understanding, if someone offers to help and play with your baby for a while - do accept and get what rest you can. This has happened to us a lot, and we have offered to mind someone else's kid when the parents look frazzled.
• If you can afford a third seat, you may find it worthwhile (maybe you are rich??)  but personally, I would rather go through the 24 hours of extreme discomfort and save some cash!
• Although 24 hours sounds a lot - and during the trip it can be hell - its over quickly and you can and will forget about it. 

Main thing for me is to relax - share the burden with your wife and try to enjoy it as an adventure. 

[Tulip1]

You just have to get on with it. It will be hard work and horrible, I remember it well but nothing you can do about it. An extra seat is a lot of money so worth thinking about a hotel stop part way which will cost a lot less. A seat would be good if you have the money. If not you take turns walking the length of the plane a million times hoping with all your might that they will soon need a nap and make the best of it. 

[AJ]

It is not so hard travelling with a baby, sometimes people stress too much.  Book a late flight so by the time you are up in the air baby will be ready to sleep for hours.  You can take baby bottles with sterilised water and formula if the baby drinks it, little tubs of food, what would your baby eat for breakfast?  Baby cereal with milk, take some in a little plastic container, and the cabin crew will give you milk.  Lots of little snacks.  If baby is too big for bassinet at least you can sit them in it as a rest from holding them.  A baby carrier is good for when you get off.  I have always done it in one go, no stop over, just delays getting back into a routine with yet another time change. You can take turns sleeping, the flight to UK is less than 24 hours, you can manage getting a couple of hours sleep at a time while the other parent looks after the baby.  

[rammygirl]

Also do try to relax, it will stress the baby if you are not.  Smile at the other passengers and make contact.  Many of them will have been in your position once and will be sympathetic, even the oldies like us!. Some can be judgemental and nasty but really that is their problem.

Babies will cry at some point it is inevitable and natural.  Definitely  go for the bulkhead seats as you can get out easily too.

 Try to take it in turns to look after Bub so you both get some rest.

I often see people with babies who act like they shouldn’t be there, stressed and embarrassed should the baby make a noise, they keep their eyes down.  They act like victims instead of parents I feel sorry for them and try to smile and re assure them it is OK!

 

 

[richev]

We did this recently with our son who was 4½ months old at the time. Flew Vietnam Airlines in premium economy, with bulkhead seats. Thoroughly recommended, and the cheapest premium economy we could find. Our son just about fit in the bassinet, and slept in it reasonably well.

If you go via Hi Chi Minh they will lay on a free hotel with long layover (ours was 10 hours). This worked well for us as it gave us time to relax and get showered etc. It was however a 30 minute journey from the airport to the hotel, not ideal with a little one sat on your lap! Next time we'd see if we could pay a bit more for a better & closer hotel.

The flights were hard though, and we spent most of the time attending to our son. And changing a nappy in an airplane toilet (it had a fold-down change table) is an interesting experience!