Guest Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 My mum has just been over for 3 weeks. I feel absolutely awful right now and confused whether i actually can see myself staying in Australia for the foreseeable. Anyone else had this feelling? Did you overcome it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 How long have you been in Aus and were you settled before this visit? Or were you already struggling and this has compounded it? I think many feel pretty miserable when family visit and then leave. Its normal. Also its winter and unless you are in sunshine the colder darker days don't help. What would concern me is if it lingered long term and left you feeling so distraught. Usually a few weeks or so and you should start to be feeling more back to normal. Depends how well you cope with things and what you are doing to resolve things or not. TBH I just tend to get on with things and not overthink or allow myself to dwell on it or bring me down too much. I've enough going on to distract me or give me time sink into a hole about missing people. They were here, they went back home and I am home is how I see it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VERYSTORMY Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 It is always hard after family visit. I remember my father in law visiting and I would have jumped on a plane on the spot. But, were you feeling ok before she visited? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 21 minutes ago, VERYSTORMY said: It is always hard after family visit. I remember my father in law visiting and I would have jumped on a plane on the spot. But, were you feeling ok before she visited? I was ok before she visited. Ive been here for 3 years now. Still dont think of Australia as home though Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calNgary Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 Ive been over here 10 years now and stil get a tad down and sad when family who have visited go home.Saying goodbye is almost as bad as the first time we had to say it when moving here. After a few weeks when life gets back to normal, i bounce back though. Cal x Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VERYSTORMY Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 As Cal says, give it a few weeks and see how it is going. If you still feel the same in a few months then have a talk with your partner about options for the future, even if they aren't immediate things, sometimes knowing that there are future possibilities takes your mind off the negatives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 The worst for me was at the airport saying farewell to parents- they looked so frail and defenceless. Makes me want to cry just thinking of it even though they are both long gone and Dad in fact came out here to live after Mum died. Mostly though it does get easier after the first couple of years ( though not for everyone, obviously). Throw yourself into activities and stay busy busy busy! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted August 8, 2017 Share Posted August 8, 2017 I'm a hard hearted Hannah I suspect - out of sight, out of mind, it's the only way to save yourself! We moved in 1979 and beyond the odd letter we were our own selves. Mum and dad started coming in about 1985 every year for 6 months - no it wasn't easy to see them come and go but once they were gone they were out of mind. They never really got into the Skype/email business even though they both had a go. End of it all though, at 87 they were too needy to be left alone so we moved back to look after them. Mum died in January and dad is fighting on at 93. Now I have one son and 2 granddaughters on the other side of the world - they are a bit more engaged with Skype but out of sight ...... I must say though that I never envisaged living in Australia forever - my head told me it was home but my heart never got with the plan so I am thrilled to be back in UK at least until dad pops his clogs (ageing by the minute unfortunately) and then I will be back in Australia until the next adventure calls 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toots Posted August 9, 2017 Share Posted August 9, 2017 18 hours ago, Schutzy11 said: My mum has just been over for 3 weeks. I feel absolutely awful right now and confused whether i actually can see myself staying in Australia for the foreseeable. Anyone else had this feelling? Did you overcome it I absolutely know what you mean. My Mum used to come for 4/5 months and when it came to near the end of her stay I was just so sad and blubbered like a baby after she'd gone home. It's not easy. Once I was busy at work and had phoned her after she had returned, I felt almost back to 'normal'. Mind you, even though I'd been living out of home since I was 16 years old, I've always found goodbyes very hard. It's been part of my life for a long time - doesn't get any easier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s713 Posted August 10, 2017 Share Posted August 10, 2017 On 8/8/2017 at 16:35, Schutzy11 said: My mum has just been over for 3 weeks. I feel absolutely awful right now and confused whether i actually can see myself staying in Australia for the foreseeable. Anyone else had this feelling? Did you overcome it 10 years in, hasn't got any easier for me. A lot of stuff still seems like a 'phase' and that causes me problems. My Mum and Dad are still relatively young (60s), if they weren't, God knows what I'd do. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ssiri Posted August 17, 2017 Share Posted August 17, 2017 My mum has just been over for 3 weeks. I feel absolutely awful right now and confused whether i actually can see myself staying in Australia for the foreseeable. Anyone else had this feelling? Did you overcome it YesSent from my iPhone using PomsinOz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 17, 2017 Share Posted August 17, 2017 Mod note. I've moved some posts to a different 'Homesick' thread as one reply was intended for that and then others replied to it. So to get things back on track, those posts are now here Also, out of respect to the OP remember that this is a post in Aussie chat, not CTF and also that it is asking others for help and support. Lets not be rude and talk/argue all over their thread taking it away from its original intent too much please. I think sometimes people get swept up in things and forget that threads are started asking for help or info and they go off at a tangent and often the argument that ensues is one we've heard and read time and time again. So lets save that stuff for CTF or a thread where debate and the like is actually asked for. When its help and support, constructive feedback or info being asked for, lets offer it, not turn it into something else to argue about. TIA snifter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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