Geordie girl Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 After 28 years in Australia we moved back to England at the end of dec 2015.....so been back 18 months now and unhappier than ever. Nothing has gone right.....i dont even know where to begin. I miss everything about australia especially family and friends, and get so upset when i think about our beautiful house and furniture that we sold. I cant get over it and even my hubby today finally said that he was unhappy too. But with 2 teenage daughters to uproot again and a huge financial cost to consider and no jobs to return to.....im at a loss. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toots Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 3 minutes ago, Geordie girl said: After 28 years in Australia we moved back to England at the end of dec 2015.....so been back 18 months now and unhappier than ever. Nothing has gone right.....i dont even know where to begin. I miss everything about australia especially family and friends, and get so upset when i think about our beautiful house and furniture that we sold. I cant get over it and even my hubby today finally said that he was unhappy too. But with 2 teenage daughters to uproot again and a huge financial cost to consider and no jobs to return to.....im at a loss. Why did you move back to England after 28 years in Australia? Many people who move to Australia and don't settle are told to give it more time so maybe you need to do that too. Is it the area you're in you don't like? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 Agree with the above to a point. If it's been 18 months already and you are more unhappy now than you were 6 months or a year ago, I'd be talking to the kids and seeing how they feel and if everybody is unhappy and struggling, then perhaps start laying the groundwork for a move back to Aus. It may mean starting over in many ways but if it gets you back where you want to be and a place you were happy and your kids are happy, there is a lot to be said for it. Perhaps one of you could go over, job hunt and make a start and when/if that falls into place the rest follow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newjez Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 59 minutes ago, Geordie girl said: After 28 years in Australia we moved back to England at the end of dec 2015.....so been back 18 months now and unhappier than ever. Nothing has gone right.....i dont even know where to begin. I miss everything about australia especially family and friends, and get so upset when i think about our beautiful house and furniture that we sold. I cant get over it and even my hubby today finally said that he was unhappy too. But with 2 teenage daughters to uproot again and a huge financial cost to consider and no jobs to return to.....im at a loss. Maybe it would help if you made a list of why you left, a list of why you are unhappy, and what you want to achieve by returning. Sometimes it's not the place that makes us unhappy, although it seems to. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Booma Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 i felt the same when we moved back though i hadnt been in oz as long as you. my husband didnt want to go back to uk in first place so wasnt well pleased when i said i thought going back was a mistake because it was me changing mind again. we did move back to oz & im very happy we did but the process did waste a lot of money & it took time to recover financially from that. if the whole family regrets the move then start saving & come back but be realistic about the financial side. although money cant buy happiness you got to be practical. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simmo Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 Maybe your depression is more deep rooted then location. Unhappy in Australia, unhappy in the UK. The original post is too brief to make a judgement but @newjez nailed it. All the reasons you left Australia? will they have gone? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 It might be a god idea to check out the posts you made before moving - they don't indicate that you had a fabulous life in Australia before you left either. It is so easy to compare the good of the then with the bad of the now when the going gets tough - heck, even this morning after a sleepless night caring for a delirious 93 year old, even I am looking at Australia with rose tinted specs and would head off at lunch time if anyone would give me tickets! May I suggest that you seek out some counselling to try and work through what ails you. Get yourself back on an emotional even keel then start looking pragmatically at what your options are. Moving to Australia when older can be fraught - not just because you have teenage kids whose education should be a priority but also because finding work as an older person in Australia can be very difficult - I believe that was one of your drivers for returning in the first place, and it won't be any easier now unfortunately. Sometimes you just have to draw a line and look forwards - always looking back over your shoulder means you will stumble and fall as you walk on. Start focusing on what small changes you can make that will make you happy in the short term but at the same time develop some longer term goals. I doubt that returning to a place where you weren't happy before is going to be the answer. Curse of the Expat is very uncomfortable! Good Luck! 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Geordie girl Posted May 7, 2017 Author Share Posted May 7, 2017 (edited) 18 hours ago, Toots said: Why did you move back to England after 28 years in Australia? Many people who move to Australia and don't settle are told to give it more time so maybe you need to do that too. Is it the area you're in you don't Edited May 7, 2017 by Geordie girl Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BacktoDemocracy Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 On 5/7/2017 at 3:00 AM, Geordie girl said: After 28 years in Australia we moved back to England at the end of dec 2015.....so been back 18 months now and unhappier than ever. Nothing has gone right.....i dont even know where to begin. I miss everything about australia especially family and friends, and get so upset when i think about our beautiful house and furniture that we sold. I cant get over it and even my hubby today finally said that he was unhappy too. But with 2 teenage daughters to uproot again and a huge financial cost to consider and no jobs to return to.....im at a loss. We have been back 3 and a bit years, I have been missing some bits of our 10 year adventure but my wife has really had a tough time much as you have been having, she has missed the house, the warmth and the wildlife and the emptiness of the countryside outside Brisbane, she has had other issues as well about being back here. We have both had readjustment issues which have boiled down to neither of us liking where we are in the country ( dictated by a crap job ) nor the house, again dictated in part by the job, so what has helped us to move on, one was for her to leave the job and decide to retrain for another career which would give her more freedom and out of that was the freedom to make choices for herself about her and our futures, I feel that what has really helped her to make peace with the past has been some quite long term counselling and then embarking on a career change which involved a lot of self discovery work on the course she is doing. I know all of this is very difficult stuff when you have family and responsibilities and comes with a whole variety of difficulties and it wasn't told with the intention of saying ,hey, you'll have to change your life, I was just trying to say it's not nothing, the feelings you're having, they are real, it's like a bereavement and maybe you need to get some help in working your way through it and finding out what is really causing the feelings you're having and if you do it together you will be able to support each other. Sorry if I've taken any liberties or trodden on any corns. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sandgroper Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 You don't mention a reason for coming back in the first place? We were in a similar position but no where near the same time in Oz first stint we just chose the wrong part of Oz (Melbourne) and then family reasons pulled us back to the uk, we soon realised the uk wasn't a place we wanted to bring up a young family though and since we moved back this time to Perth have not looked back. I think as suggested earlier make a list, weigh up your options (make sure you involve the teens in all the discussions though) and good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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