How often do you make the trip back 'home'?

[Beaty 111]

Ok, some of you may hate those folks who've migrated but still call home - 'home' - but let's not get into an argument about my choice of words (again).

 

But seriously.

 

How often do you go back to your 'country of origin', for a visit?

 

And who are you visiting?

 

B

[Marisawright 10,724]

I think that for a lot of people, however often they'd like to go back, they're limited by cost and time. Even if you're going to stay with family when you're there, the air fares are expensive! Plus thanks to jet lag, it's hardly worth going if you can't stay for three weeks or more - and that means you've got to persuade your employer to give you a big block of leave all at once, which isn't always easy.

 

It was easier for me because it was just the two of us, we didn't have to pay fares for a whole family. Plus my oh was a teacher, so we didn't have to try to coordinate getting a big block of leave from two different employers. Of course that also meant the air fares were more expensive because we could only travel in school holidays.

 

When my parents were alive I'd save up all my annual leave (and cash!) and we'd go back for six or seven weeks every OTHER year.

 

We were always conscious of making our parents and in-laws happy so it was always more of a treat for them than us - we'd let them drag me round all the aunts and uncles and cousins. I always tried to fit in a week in Greece or Spain or somewhere at the end, because by that time I needed a break to recover from all the endless cups of tea! Also of course, I couldn't take any other holidays because I never had any spare annual leave.

 

Since my parents passed away, I haven't been back as often - I've enjoyed being able to choose holidays for ME at long last! I've just spent a year in the UK and have enjoyed being able to spend time with my sisters, nieces and nephews but I'm looking forward to going "home" - which is Australia for me now.

Edited June 17, 2016 by Marisawright

[NickyNook 690]

I've been here for over 35 years now and I've been back seven times in that period. So, every five years on average, though there was a nine year gap once.

 

Now we're retired we'll probably visit more frequently - I envisage trips to the UK every other year, with holidays elsewhere in the interval.

 

When we're there, we catch up with siblings and old friends and enjoy revisiting places we knew well when younger.

[Celt Down Under 786]

We have been here for over 34 years, and used to visit back there about every 5 years. In recent years, we have visited on average, every couple of years, but always tie that in to other travel. Either a cruise, or a USA visit to see my elder sister. I have 2 siblings left in the UK, neither who have ever visited Australia, and are most unlikely to, so I have a catch up with them when there. On our last visit in March, I did not see my younger sister who lives in Winchester, because she had other things to do which prevented her coming to North Wales, and I seen my younger brother 3 times in 3 weeks, even though he was in the same town. Maybe I need to change my deodrant or aftershave. :wink:

[Keith and Linda 2,477]

We are pretty much like celt, every 18-24 months and tie-in other holidays on the way. We both have parents still in the UK and we also have a son his wife and our two granddaughters there so we have a strong calling to keep returning.

However as it is just Linda and myself so do not have the added travel costs of children.

Must also add that like celt some folk do find it extremely hard to give up a little of their time and put them selves out to make just the shortest of trips to see you when you are there! amazing really how many people say "yes, come and see us when you're here"! you have just done 12000 mile and they are troubled to do 12:wacko:

[ramot 7,022]

We are pretty much like celt, every 18-24 months and tie-in other holidays on the way. We both have parents still in the UK and we also have a son his wife and our two granddaughters there so we have a strong calling to keep returning.

 

Must also add that like celt some folk do find it extremely hard to give up a little of their time and put them selves out to make just the shortest of trips to see you when you are there! amazing really how many people say "yes, come and see us when you're here"! you have just done 12000 mile and they are troubled to do 12:wacko:

 

As an expat and now living in Oz, it is amazing how often you hear the same story as above, we ended up saying when back in UK, this is where we are if you want to see us! Otherwise you spend hours/days rushing around to see people who can't make th effort to see you, so many people have no concept of how far you have come.

 

We go back most years as our only 2 grandchildren are in UK, and usually spend at least 2 months there, but to be honest would hardly ever go back if they weren't there.

[ali 16,504]

I've been back to the UK once in 9 years (for 6 days) and that's because my dad passed away, otherwise I still wouldn't have wanted to go back at all. Home for me is here, my family, home, work are here .. I don't long for the UK and it has no particularly draw or pull for me. I do have great memories though and don't hate it ... it just isn't 'home'

[Parley 7,791]

I've been back to the UK once in 9 years (for 6 days) and that's because my dad passed away, otherwise I still wouldn't have wanted to go back at all. Home for me is here, my family, home, work are here .. I don't long for the UK and it has no particularly draw or pull for me. I do have great memories though and don't hate it ... it just isn't 'home'

 

what has being home got to do with it ?

 

Do you mean you never go on holiday anywhere because it isn't home ?

[Guest]

I go home on average every 18 months to 2 years. I'm returning next month and that will be my 4th trip in 7 and a half years. I'd love to go back more often but the cost and the amount of leave it requires make that impossible I'm afraid. I still experience homesickness very badly so these trips are a big boost for me psychologically as I can spend meaningful time with family and friends and experience the comfortable familiarity of home.

[Guest]

During all my years living overseas away from my country of birth, I have gone back as little as possible. Almost a decade away (living in Europe) I think I went back a total of 3 or 4 times and then only for long weekends if I could help it. I did one longer trip and a week in was changing my flight so I could go back sooner. 3 weeks dropped to 2 and I was out of there. Could not get to Heathrow quick enough.

 

Since being here, 2.5 years now, I've made one trip back for 3.5 weeks which was at the 18 month mark. I'd happily have not gone at all tbh. My only reason for going was to see my parents and for them to see their grandchild. It was a lovely couple of weeks for them and him but I struggled a great deal after about the 10 day mark and while I was happy to spend time with them and friends, I also wanted to be gone. Anywhere, just not the UK.

 

Next time if we go it will be for a week to visit my parents then off to Europe. Or if they are happy to, we'll all meet in France for a holiday and I won't have to set foot in the UK at all. Thankfully they come here to visit too. Hanging around the UK is not a holiday for me, I don't feel refreshed after visiting and I would honestly rather be elsewhere in the world. Its not I hate the UK, far from it, lived there happily for a long time, just I've made my home elsewhere in the world a number of times now and every time, that is home and where my life is. Holidays I'd rather visit places I want to see, experience, explore and the UK is not really on that list. Living there for a long time, I saw lots of it, know my way round and I'd like to holiday elsewhere in the world more.

[LKC 2,986]

We're going back for a four week visit in September/October, which will be our second visit in 7.5 years. The first time we went was after four years here, this time will be three years after that. We probably wouldn't have gone until next year (it is my grandma's 90th birthday and I would have liked to have seen her for that), but my mother in law is being treated for breast cancer and I think it is important that we spend some time with her (she should be fine after treatment). That said, we haven't had a holiday for almost two years, aside from a couple of days away with the in-laws when they were here at Christmas, because OH has been too busy at work and we have been renovating the house, so we are tacking on a few days in Scotland as a holiday whilst we are there.

[Thom 279]

Ok, some of you may hate those folks who've migrated but still call home - 'home' - but let's not get into an argument about my choice of words (again).

 

But seriously.

 

How often do you go back to your 'country of origin', for a visit?

 

And who are you visiting?

 

B

 

Promised me mother when I emigrated, that I would go back at least every two years, stuck with that.. Next time I return will be the last time.

 

Visit friends and family, but also the moors and coast I love.

[Guest Libra]

Once was enough for me, it was then only for my Husbands sake. Give it maybe another ten years.......

[Lindor 3,927]

2 to 3 times a year.

[ali 16,504]

what has being home got to do with it ?

 

Do you mean you never go on holiday anywhere because it isn't home ?

 

If you'd read the OP they asked about calling 'home' home and linked it with country of origin and visiting. I put both things together in my response (linking it to the question of the OP). I go on holiday a lot Parley - but won't bore you with my travels - but if you're really interested I can add you on FB so you can see my pics.

[Beaty 111]

Promised me mother when I emigrated, that I would go back at least every two years, stuck with that.. Next time I return will be the last time.

 

Visit friends and family, but also the moors and coast I love.

 

Just curious Thom, you were going home bi-annually and next time if the last time?

 

What's the reason for the last visit?

 

B

[Guest]

As an expat and now living in Oz, it is amazing how often you hear the same story as above, we ended up saying when back in UK, this is where we are if you want to see us! Otherwise you spend hours/days rushing around to see people who can't make th effort to see you, so many people have no concept of how far you have come.

 

We go back most years as our only 2 grandchildren are in UK, and usually spend at least 2 months there, but to be honest would hardly ever go back if they weren't there.

 

Truly this is the curse of the ex-pat, that once you leave, the bubble seals behind you and when you return it feels like you're imposing upon those you left behind! I know that my family and friends will be delighted to see us when we return next month but their own lives take precedence and rightly so. We'll fit in around them, as after all, we left them in the first place!

[Peach 3,261]

Never, if I can avoid it. More space and better weather if they visit us.

[ramot 7,022]

Truly this is the curse of the ex-pat, that once you leave, the bubble seals behind you and when you return it feels like you're imposing upon those you left behind! I know that my family and friends will be delighted to see us when we return next month but their own lives take precedence and rightly so. We'll fit in around them, as after all, we left them in the first place!

 

I should add to my original post, that even though we left UK 24 years ago, our oldest and longest friends do go out of their way to welcome us back, a big get together is always organised in our old village, usually at the pub! and our closest friends go out of their way to insist we stay with them for a good catch up. You just have to pace yourself and make sure you leave enough time to do what you want to do, as although it's lovely to see everyone, the travelling around to catch up seems to fall on the visitor.

Over the years you realise who really wants to see you!

Also most of our closest friends have visited us here.

 

We enjoy going back to our old village, love being with our friends who shared our lives when we lived there, but realise we have moved on with our lives.

[Guest]

Never, if I can avoid it. More space and better weather if they visit us.

 

Did you hate living in the UK Peach?

[Lambethlad 258]

I'm planning to go back next year for the first time in 33 years. I have one remaining relative who I am very fond of who I probably will never see again and that is my main reason. My wife is Australian has never been to the UK and isn't that keen on going. She would rather spend two weeks in Bali than go through the long flight and expense of 6 weeks in the UK and come to think of it so would I.

[Peach 3,261]

Did you hate living in the UK Peach?

 

No, not one bit. Love the UK; just being practical - I have more room for family here, I don't really enjoy the flight and so on.

[Celt Down Under 786]

I should add to my original post, that even though we left UK 24 years ago, our oldest and longest friends do go out of their way to welcome us back, a big get together is always organised in our old village, usually at the pub! and our closest friends go out of their way to insist we stay with them for a good catch up. You just have to pace yourself and make sure you leave enough time to do what you want to do, as although it's lovely to see everyone, the travelling around to catch up seems to fall on the visitor.

Over the years you realise who really wants to see you!

Also most of our closest friends have visited us here.

 

We enjoy going back to our old village, love being with our friends who shared our lives when we lived there, but realise we have moved on with our lives.

 

An excellent point re friends. We have had more invites from friends to go out, and to spend time with them than family have given. In fact, a couple of women who I went to school with, but never socialised with when there, have become our closest friends back there, and we neve fail to get dinner invites, or nights out invites when back there from them and their husbands. They always make time for us, more so than family.

[Beaty 111]

Let's remember too folks.

 

Some people leave Ireland or Britain for Germany and they're not seen for years!

 

B

[Keith and Linda 2,477]

Truly this is the curse of the ex-pat, that once you leave, the bubble seals behind you and when you return it feels like you're imposing upon those you left behind! I know that my family and friends will be delighted to see us when we return next month but their own lives take precedence and rightly so. We'll fit in around them, as after all, we left them in the first place![/quote

The thing is that they can find time for you so long as it is you that goes around to see them, it is the extra bit of travel time that really is some sort of big inconvenience to them, even just a night out, of which they do regularly some still have excuses.