jasepom Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Australia will never be home you say. But you've made it your home for 15 years and it's your children's home too. If you go back to uk you may not settle there either. And as for big and give me a bogan over a chav any day. Went back to live in the UK and was very shocked how many rough people are about. To me Australia is an educated country you get your bogans everywhere. Aren't you grateful to Australia for giving you a nice standard of living ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MovingtoTasmania Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Australia will never be home you say. But you've made it your home for 15 years and it's your children's home too. If you go back to uk you may not settle there either. And as for big and give me a bogan over a chav any day. Went back to live in the UK and was very shocked how many rough people are about. To me Australia is an educated country you get your bogans everywhere. Aren't you grateful to Australia for giving you a nice standard of living ? What an odd comment to make! Surely any standard of living that the OP has managed to achieve is due to her own hard work, as I very much doubt if "Australia" gave her money to live. It's the same anywhere you live, if you work hard, you achieve a certain standard of living. As for a place being home, not necessarily. Sociologists who study diaspora can tell you that someone with a diasporic consciousness which it sounds like the OP has, will always yearn to return to the "homeland" and therefore never settle completely in another country, regardless of where that country is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 (edited) Oh well, I have received a notification that my message s too short, are they taking the piss???? I have been here in WA for about 15 years. Yeah sure it is great if you want to drive to the local supermarket with no hassle. BUT there are so many disadvantages. No 1 Australia is full of very ignorant people The nub of your problem seems to be that you regretted leaving family behind, and your daughter going back is the last straw. That's an important message to share - but you're ruining it by making sweeping generalisations about how crap Australia is. Prospective migrants are going to read your post, decide you're just a whinger and dismiss it, so your message is lost. Some people are closer to family than others - we didn't find it hard to leave ours behind, as we'd been living at the other end of the UK for years beforehand. I do worry when I see people posting here about the anguish of leaving their family when they migrate - if they're finding it that distressing, they probably shouldn't go, because they're going to regret it. Who knows, if you'd stayed in the UK, one of them might've married an Aussie or a Yank or an Italian, so there's no guarantee your family would be any more "together" than they are now. Edited April 29, 2014 by Marisawright Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Australia will never be home you say. But you've made it your home for 15 years and it's your children's home too. If you go back to uk you may not settle there either. And as for big and give me a bogan over a chav any day. Went back to live in the UK and was very shocked how many rough people are about. To me Australia is an educated country you get your bogans everywhere. Aren't you grateful to Australia for giving you a nice standard of living ? There re is rough people everywhere , do you walk round oz with blinkers on , I'm not saying it's not a beautiful country but I find the crime here far more vicious than uk , if people choos uk that's fine , they give oz ago they carnt be judged , I've just read a post where future migrants will dismiss the post because they come across has whinging , I don't think they whinging it's has exactly what they feel , it's not a uk v oz post but it winds me up also , when people say uk is riddled with crime and chavs so is here , you've only got watch current affair to know what goes on in oz wide it opens my eyes I tell you , my hubbie went the bottle shop , 3 guys come upto him here you alright mate , my hubbie said yes thanks are you , they looked my hubbie up and down and said you won't be in a minute , my hubbie said touch me I'll cave ya head in , they buggered off , but the king punch goes round so you've got be careful , also only been here 4 weeks two murders over near the river spoke to the hairdresser there was actually 4 in a short space of time do not be fooled by either country idiots everywhere . But Australia is beautiful and so is uk in my eyes weather wins for oz but miss my son , but I'll give it me all well I'm here . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johndoe Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 Maybe you should move to another state and give it another try. NSW is a great state, great people and great opportunities. Are you Victor Meldew by any chance? No, that's me according to me kids and grandkids Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted April 29, 2014 Share Posted April 29, 2014 (edited) you've only got watch current affair to know what goes on in oz wide it opens my eyes I tell you , my hubbie went the bottle shop , 3 guys come upto him here you alright mate , my hubbie said yes thanks are you , they looked my hubbie up and down and said you won't be in a minute , my hubbie said touch me I'll cave ya head in Don't believe a word of what A Current Affair says. It's well known to exaggerate and even downright lie to make a story look good. They sensationalise everything and if you take the time to research one of their stories, you'll usually find they've told only half of it and it's not nearly as bad as they've made out. Edited April 29, 2014 by Marisawright Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Don't believe a word of what A Current Affair says. It's well known to exaggerate and even downright lie to make a story look good. They sensationalise everything and if you take the time to research one of their stories, you'll usually find they've told only half of it and it's not nearly as bad as they've made out. Well maybe so , but why air it to make oz look bad , the news carnt be wrong also I was just saying from my point of view same world over with drugs , crime , murders you will never get away from it no matter where you live in the world , new ice drug here last night on the news , shop lifters galore in Myers lol . I'm just saying uk and oz we are fortunate to live in either country but I'm not fooled by what goes on in either country too . Everyone's different family is the main reason people get drawn back if ya family's here then great , if I do decide settle here which I do hope but ya have to see on the job front , I'm hoping my son will come over to stay eventually but I'll see how it goes , I do feel for people though it's not a easy ride , some fit it like a glove some don't everyone is different . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasepom Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 What an odd comment to make! Surely any standard of living that the OP has managed to achieve is due to her own hard work, as I very much doubt if "Australia" gave her money to live. It's the same anywhere you live, if you work hard, you achieve a certain standard of living. As for a place being home, not necessarily. Sociologists who study diaspora can tell you that someone with a diasporic consciousness which it sounds like the OP has, will always yearn to return to the "homeland" and therefore never settle completely in another country, regardless of where that country is. its not an odd comment when I see people complain about their standard of living and are also insulting the nation that gave that standard of living. It was most likely Australian business owners that has made that standard of living possible by offering jobs to whinging poms. If they see some of the posts on here from whinging poms they may not bother in the future. After all English people are sooo much better educated they can fend for themselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aunt Agatha Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 I see your point Jasepom but the UK (as a first world country) offers a decent standard of living for many and yet you don't appear to feel any gratitude for what it gave you. Why should the OP feel any different just because it's Australia? I personally think that anyone born in a first world country (and its access to clean drinking water, education, medical care etc.) has already won big in life's lottery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Johndoe Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 It was most likely Australian business owners that has made that standard of living possible by offering jobs to whinging poms. Horlicks! The unions made that standard of living piossible. Do you really beleive that employers freely give a half decent compulsory minimum wage, or any decent wage, freely, of their own accord? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marisawright Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Well maybe so , but why air it to make oz look bad , the news carnt be wrong . The news can easily be wrong. Newspapers and TV need viewers/readers to make money, and they know no one is interested in hearing good news stories - it's scandal that attracts attention. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jasepom Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Horlicks! The unions made that standard of living piossible. Do you really beleive that employers freely give a half decent compulsory minimum wage, or any decent wage, freely, of their own accord? Wages are usually given according to market conditions not because unions forcing them to pay a certain rate, not in my profession anyway. Or maybe that's a viewpoint that's hard to swallow in this age of entitlement. I certainly wouldn't give a job to someone because they wanted it more but because they were the best candidate. Also that they respected and wanted to work for their employer or I spose that's anti-unionist too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 The news can easily be wrong. Newspapers and TV need viewers/readers to make money, and they know no one is interested in hearing good news stories - it's scandal that attracts attention. Yeah ah swings both ways then lol uk news must be wrong too it's a now win situation between each country IMO , both has bad as each other . Same crap different country but. The sun is great well I like it lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tina2 Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Numbers 7, 8, 9 and 10 are very personal to each individual so therefore I would not presume to know your feelings better than you but I do feel that you need to think carefully about strategies that you can put in to place to help you return to the UK since you are so obviously unhappy in Australia. Whether or not your children are married to Australians is not something that should enter in to the equation because they will live their lives as you have lived yours. I'm so sorry that you will so depressed but I think you need to be careful about wearing rose coloured glasses when viewing the UK (or any other country for that matter). Can i just comment on a couple of things here. Daughter married to an Aussie, now devorced and bound by Family Court orders that mean NO she can not move overseas or even to a different state or even a different suburb with out the approval of the ex unless she hands over the kids and walks away. In fact she cant even go on a holiday overseas with out requesting approval from the ex if she wants to take the kids O/S on a holiday. To return and leave her here with small children is something we could never do. Second the exchange rate is such that to sell here would make it very difficult to buy a similar home in the UK, so we just have to make the best of it, but I sure understand your feelings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
docboat Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Each person needs to make a clear decision about which direction they want life to go in. The OP has, in my opinion, despite initial delight at being in Australia, also clearly never had the understanding that Australia is now "home" - which means that she should really have looked at her stay in Australia as an extended break from the UK. The problem may be that her partner has, indeed, made Australia home, and she is therefore in a bad place as regards future actions. As I have often stated before, it is not the situation which is the problem, but the perception of the situation - and that means it is really a matter of the mind, not the situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beach pig Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Cant be doing with these sweeping generalisation posts about the uk or aus,i think they're ridiculous tbh I do not think they are sweeping generalisations at all .it is her take on what she has witnessed after 15yrs in oz .if someone on here gave a statement about how crap my hometown is I would agree it is crap but it still is home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beach pig Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Australia will never be home you say. But you've made it your home for 15 years and it's your children's home too. If you go back to uk you may not settle there either. And as for big and give me a bogan over a chav any day. Went back to live in the UK and was very shocked how many rough people are about. To me Australia is an educated country you get your bogans everywhere. Aren't you grateful to Australia for giving you a nice standard of living ? As a manual working man you have to work hard and longer hours for that nice standard of living here Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NickyNook Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 (edited) I do not think they are sweeping generalisations at all .it is her take on what she has witnessed after 15yrs in oz .if someone on here gave a statement about how crap my hometown is I would agree it is crap but it still is home. You think comments like: "Australia is full of very ignorant people" "Everyone here try's to outdo others with their disgusting Mac Mansions, which are totally tasteless." "Once your house is about 30 years old, everybody will give u grief unless u knock it down and build a new one" aren't sweeping generalisations? Of course they are. They're ludicrous statements. No-one in their right mind would think otherwise.:rolleyes: Edited April 30, 2014 by NickyNook Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jac2011 Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 I don't think its Australia in particular the OP is upset about, I think she's upset about the state of her family situation. Unfortunately, the same could have been said in the UK. In your situation I would set a time in which you will support your daughter, perhaps 5 years and then plan to move back to where you consider home is. Try to embrace Australia as somewhere you will only be for 5 more years. I would also seriously consider whether you feel you are struggling with low mood at the moment from all the things you have on, perhaps a visit to the GP just for a chat and to get some support. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nic1171 Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Whilst sympathising with you I must point out that the UK equivalent to bogans are chavs and there are plenty of those around. Barely articulate youths who cannot string a sentence together without ffing being used at least once, who have not the faintest idea what a bin is used for and chuck their empty drink cans and bottles, half eaten kebabs, cig give packs etc in your garden or on the road as they go and these are the least unsavoury. Gang culture very strong too and we are not in a bad area either. did you live on the same estate as me in UK?!! Maybe be im just fortunate in where I've settled on the Gold Coast but I haven't encountered any of what I did back in my home town. Like everywhere there's good and bad areas but IMO in the UK it's more apparent. I wouldn't go the the local shops after dark because of the youth culture, there were chavs by the dozen, not sure I've even seen a bogan here. I work hard here but no harder than UK and have a much better standard of living. Sometimes I think it's how you feel emotionally when you judge a place. To the OP I hope you find happiness somewhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gbye grey sky Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 did you live on the same estate as me in UK?!! Maybe be im just fortunate in where I've settled on the Gold Coast but I haven't encountered any of what I did back in my home town. Like everywhere there's good and bad areas but IMO in the UK it's more apparent. I wouldn't go the the local shops after dark because of the youth culture, there were chavs by the dozen, not sure I've even seen a bogan here. I work hard here but no harder than UK and have a much better standard of living. Sometimes I think it's how you feel emotionally when you judge a place. To the OP I hope you find happiness somewhere. I should add that I don't even consider this to be a bad area, many are much, much worse. It is not a factor influencing me either as I am used to it, they don't bother me that much tbh and it's just a fact of life in the UK I feel. I have no real grasp of the reasons but anti-social behaviour just appears more prevalent and overt in the UK than other places. Often when encountered abroad the offenders are Brits too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pablo Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 I do not think they are sweeping generalisations at all .it is her take on what she has witnessed after 15yrs in oz .if someone on here gave a statement about how crap my hometown is I would agree it is crap but it still is home. Thats up to you,i do Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Perthbum Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 oh well, i have received a notification that my message s too short, are they taking the piss???? I have been here in wa for about 15 years. Yeah sure it is great if you want to drive to the local supermarket with no hassle. But there are so many disadvantages. No 1 australia is full of very ignorant people (otherwise known as bogans) no 2 the weather is certainly better than in the uk, but that takes away from our excitement of going somewhere warm for 2 weeks p a. No 3 everyone here try's to outdo others with their disgusting mac mansions, which are totally tasteless. No $ once your house is about 30 years old, everybody will give u grief unless u knock it down and build a new one. Sooo environmentally unfriendly! No 6 as i was told when i came over, there are more sharks on the land than in the sea. No 7 don't forget for 1 minute to underestimate the sadness (on both sides) of leaving your family. No 8 this place is not and will never be home. No 9 if you choose to take this path, like i did.....think about what you are leaving behind. Ie your heritage, your family and the love and support that you can give to them and also remember that if one or two of your children marries/partners with an aussie you are stuck! No 10 don't always convince yourselves that you can go back, because it is not always that easy. And on a final note, if you love shopping malls and hate independent retailers, you may think this is great. But i for one have no interest in big brother business and it has got seriously expensive to live here. I do believe it will get worse. Basically this is not a great place to live ad until my dying day i truly regret coming here. I think i would have been better off in southern ireland (i am not irish by the way) where people are lovely and intelligent. Tread your own path, but think of the long term repercussions. I seem to have missed out on no 5, but never mind i am sure most of you will get the gist lol. this is spot on Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wattsy1982 Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 Who knows, if you'd stayed in the UK, one of them might've married an Aussie or a Yank or an Italian, so there's no guarantee your family would be any more "together" than they are now. Might not have either... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shellybingobingo Posted April 30, 2014 Share Posted April 30, 2014 I think the op is proberbly depressed , I think it's time to leave it now , she or he may be desperate we don't know so just what's right for one isn't right for us all , ok maybe could of come across a little better , but hey oh nobody's perfect . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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