barney83 Posted March 22, 2013 Share Posted March 22, 2013 Hi, I am preparing for my IELTS test in 2 weeks time and need a little bit of help here. You see, i am practicing my IELTS general writing a lot as that's my weakest band i think. I've been writing a lot of the part 2 essay and i don't have an examiner to see where i stand for my band score. I would like to seek help here if anyone here would be nice enough to read my essay and judge the band score i would be getting. If it's alright i'll post the essay question here and my written answer. My essay might not be the best though as i am not a native English speaker. Do let me know if anyone is willing to read my essay and judge the band score. Thanks :cute: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BritChickx Posted March 22, 2013 Share Posted March 22, 2013 Sorry I can't help, just want to bump the thread up and wish you good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted March 22, 2013 Share Posted March 22, 2013 I will read your essay and comment. But I cannot tell you what band it would get. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barney83 Posted March 23, 2013 Author Share Posted March 23, 2013 I will read your essay and comment. But I cannot tell you what band it would get. Hey Ruppert! Here's the question for task 2 and answer from me: Q) Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbishwhy do you think this is happening? what can the governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produces? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience A) It is true that more rubbish are being produced at an alarming rate. I will be discussing why and how to minimize rubbish world wide. There are several reasons why more rubbish are being produced everyday. Firstly would be the increase of world population. As the world population grows, the shopping power will increase and that would also increase the rubbish collected each day which cannot be controlled. Another reason to it would be citizens' ignorance when throwing rubbish. When they throw rubbish away, they don't take into account that some of the items actually can be recycled. These are very selfish who does things only for their own convenience. I believe that to stop producing more rubbish, first we need to educate the citizen with the help from government funding. Advertisement on radios, billboards, and televisions will be needed to broadcast the message across. Every citizen will encounter these advertisement and if we put the right message like pictures of rubbish and statistic to educate them about the rubbish crisis, it will surely help. Another solution that the government could help is by enforcing school to educate children in school about rubbish crisis and how to counter them by examples like recycling items. Children will be the future of the world and if we don't educate them now about rubbish problems we are facing now at young age, it will be worst in the future. In conclusion, rubbish is becoming a bigger problem and with the help from the government, i think we should be able to counter this problem in the future. (265 word) Please excuse my writing if it's bad. Any comments will help certainly! Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kubby Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 Hey Ruppert! Here's the question for task 2 and answer from me: Please excuse my writing if it's bad. Any comments will help certainly! Thanks. If you are based out of Sydney, these guys can help: http://www.ielts.mq.edu.au/one2one.html They are professionals !! If you are not from sydney then i am sure there would be something similar in your city ! All you need to do is find it out. Best of luck buddy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 (edited) Okay, as you know the quality of your debate is not being judged so I am not commenting on that. Only your use of English and whether you address the questions will be looked at so my thoughts / edits on that alone are below in red. There is of course always more than one way to word things. The amount of rubbish we are now generating is increasing at an alarming rate, I will be discussing why and how to minimize rubbish world wide. There are several reasons why more rubbish is being produced everyday. Firstly it is due to the increase of world population. As the world's population grows, the shopping power will increase and that also increases the rubbish collected each day which cannot be controlled. Another reason is citizens' ignorance when discarding of their rubbish. When they throw rubbish away, they don't take into account that some items can be recycled. These are very selfish people who do things only for their own convenience. To stop the increase in the production of rubbish, first we need to educate citizens with the help from government funding. Advertisements on radio, billboards and television could be used to broadcast the message across the world (?). Every citizen will be exposed to government advertisements and with the right messaging, pictures of rubbish and statistics to educate about the rubbish crisis, it will surely help. Another solution that the government could introduce is to enforce schools to educate children about the rubbish crisis and what they can do to help, for example by recycling items. The future of the world is in the hands of children and if we don't educate them now about the rubbish problem we are facing, then it will only worsen in the future. In conclusion, rubbish disposal is becoming increasingly problematic but with the help from the government, I think we should be able to counter this problem in the future. Edited March 23, 2013 by Rupert Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
barney83 Posted March 23, 2013 Author Share Posted March 23, 2013 Okay, as you know the quality of your debate is not being judged so I am not commenting on that. Only your use of English and whether you address the questions will be looked at so my thoughts / edits on that alone are below in red. There is of course always more than one way to word things. thanks Rupert! looks like i will need more practice in getting the words right. I will take your comments and learn how to write better essay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BritChickx Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 I was gonna comment but rupert got there first with the grammar lol. Also I think minimize is spelt minimise? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted March 23, 2013 Share Posted March 23, 2013 I was gonna comment but rupert got there first with the grammar lol. Also I think minimize is spelt minimise? American English versus UK English. I would go for the UK "minimise" myself too, but I didn't change it as I thought OP would not be penalised for American spellings. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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