Incata Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Hello Just wondered if anyone can tell me if I am normal (my hubbie can stay out of this one before he joins in with any rude comments!) My husband has flown out to Perth - he landed today, so he can start applying for jobs as soon as the recruitment agencies open on Wednesday (and hopefully jobs start being posted). He is also planning to buy a car and find us somewhere to rent before the children (aged 3 and 2) and I fly out in about 3 weeks time. This made complete sense and I am happy about it. My problem is that I am absolutely terrified about going. I know that we are doing the right thing and I am sure that he will secure a job, but I don't know why and I feeling this way. I have lived abroad before so I am expecting a period of adjustment and that things will be tough for a while until we have made friends and got settled in an area, so it isn't fear of moving to a new country/area etc. I suspect it may be terror about the flight. We visited Perth earlier in the year and had dreadful turbulence on the way back. The pilot put the seatbelt warning light on and then without warning headed for the deck. He put the nose down and we dropped, very fast. We thought we were going to die and almost everyone on the flight (except my husband who was watching a war film and youngest son who was asleep throughout), was screaming. Plates, cups and meal trays were flying all over the cabin and even the stewards and stewardesses we could see (who were strapped in) looked terrified. He dropped 7,000 feet in under 15 seconds (although it felt much longer than that) and then announced that we were now below the storm at 34,000 feet (from being at 41,000 feet) and he thought things would be a bit better now. I managed not to scream or cry although I did close my eyes to try and stop myself from throwing up. I held my 3 year old who, when we finally stopped dropping announced through his tears that he now wanted to get off. I was trying to persuade my little lad that it was all going to be okay but it was so hard when we had grown men screaming "Allu Akbhar" all around us (we were on an Arab airline) and women yelling for God to save us. I have never been so scared in my entire life. I don't know how to deal with the fear. Clearly as I am travelling with two toddlers I can't take sedatives to stay calm on the flight as I have to be on the ball to keep them entertained and to stop them annoying the other travellers. I considered going by boat but I loathe boats even more. Can anyone make any suggestions? Many thanks Carolyn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest51810 Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Hi carolyn. Sorry to hear that - must of been very scary! What about going to see a hypnotist? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rupert Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 It is a shame you did not fly out together then really, I always recommend it when people ask if they should go separately. I don't know what else to say really. You know that air travel is safer than getting into a car of course and I am a big believer in the law of averages, the chances of something scary happening to you again are remote indeed (statistically). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest26012 Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Geez Hun you have a terrible fear! As the above post said I would consider a hypnotherapist! You had a bad experience and that's going to stay with you! Speak to the airline you are flying with, they may be able to help you through your fears. Most airlines are really good with these things. Good luck Hun. X Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mushahid Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Terrifying ordeal you had to go through . I am absolutely terrified of flying....And Bad pilots and weather ......Believe me I have clocked more than a million miles ....and never have i felt relaxed through out my flight time...all my life....Still I constantly Imagine better ways to travel than flying...I use Road transport where ever I can find road access...... No one can beat me in the "fear of flying "contest...lol:)... I will be flying to Perth in two weeks time and hope for ZERO Turbulence...I am Flying Emirates or Singapore Airlines...Not because of expert pilots or less turbulence...But I have always used Emirates, Etihad and Singapore Airlines to Fly to UK and other Mid East work destinations...I liked these airlines... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mushahid Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 And to add...I believe that whenever my time has come...I cannot avoid it....So be it in a plane, or walking down the road......If I have to go...Then so be it.. Not Yet...Not Just yet....( Gladiator last dialogue by Djimon Hounsou) Cheers... To all the Flying phobia people.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pablo Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Try to think of how many times youve flown("assuming" a fair bit?),and how many times this has happened,is it the once? IF it is,then theres your reassurance,very unlikely to happen again,i cant stand flying meself,not scared at all,because if it goes wrong i know its "end of" more than likely,my biggest fear is ending up alive but brain dead kind of thing tbh. Same when i worked on cradles outside a block of flats,sooner the cradle crashed on the 11th floor and be done with it than the 3rd/4th and end up alive but in a bad way. As has been said,its extremely unlikely anything will happen,safest form of transport isnt it? I despise flying because of the whole rigmarole,not being able to sleep and have a ciggy,you'l be fine i'm 100% certain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest51810 Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 I dont know if they work at all but theres those "kalm" tablets aswell Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest26012 Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Words of wisdom Pabs, as always! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pablo Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Words of wisdom Pabs, as always! Lol,very kind Cow,did i mention "herbs"?!awwwww i'm just a bag of vices!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest26012 Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Lol,very kind Cow,did i mention "herbs"?!awwwww i'm just a bag of vices!!!!!!!!!!! Youre wasted in your job Pabs lol! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaxcooper Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Hi Carolyn, I am a hypnotherapist and i understand how traumatised that past experience has left you, quite understandibly. I can certainly recommend going to see a good hypnotherapist in your area as we help people to overcome fears and trauma regularly. Where abouts are you based? i would be happy to send you information on finding someone reputable in your area if you'd like. You deserve to enjoy the whole experience of this move and you can :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 Thank you for all the help, advice and private messages. All appreciated and I will take the advice given with thanks. You are all correct, I have flown many times before and never had a problem, and it is safer to fly than any other form of transport (particularly those which involve my husband being behind the wheel!). I shall also be taking a huge box of chocolates, all to be consumed well before landing, so that customs don't swipe them for their tea break! If you are at Perth airport near the end of January, the children and I will be the ones with chocolate all over our faces! Many thanks Carolyn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pablo Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Thank you for all the help, advice and private messages. All appreciated and I will take the advice given with thanks. I shall also be taking a huge box of chocolates, all to be consumed well before landing, so that customs don't swipe them for their tea break! If you are at Perth airport near the end of January, the children and I will be the ones with chocolate all over our faces! Good luck CS,hope its the most boring,uneventful flight in the history of mankind,best of luck in Aus as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmjg Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Thank you for all the help, advice and private messages. All appreciated and I will take the advice given with thanks. I shall also be taking a huge box of chocolates, all to be consumed well before landing, so that customs don't swipe them for their tea break! If you are at Perth airport near the end of January, the children and I will be the ones with chocolate all over our faces! If you listen to Pablo, you'll also be drunk & stoned! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Incata Posted December 31, 2012 Author Share Posted December 31, 2012 If you listen to Pablo, you'll also be drunk & stoned! If only I could afford business class I would be very, very merry on landing (as I suspect the kids would be, given half a chance to get their hands on it!) However, there is still a chance - the national lottery is making 25 UK millionaires tomorrow and I am sure I will be one of them! :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacaranda Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Its a shame hon you don't have another adult travelling with you,especially on a long haul with 2 young kids.I've never experienced anything like you have,only a small amount of turbulence and that was abit nerveracking.I havent got any advice for you,but I do hope you have a nice smooth stress free flight.xxx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pablo Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 If you listen to Pablo, you'll also be drunk & stoned! Reverse psychology DM,most people read my suggestions and do the opposite,which is normally advisable! I cant stand flying,the check in,queues ,no smoking(caught in the toilets once for shame!),£79 for a cup of tea in the airport etc,like i say,altho i'm arsing about,i do hope the girl has a good and uneventful flight Every flight ive ever been on i spend importuning, walking round the toilet block because i cant sleep:mad:,and cursing everyone who IS asleep!:wink: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mickyb Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Not to keen on flying myself . Helps if I manage to get an emergency exit seat ( for leg room , not escape ) . Turbulence used to petrify me but I worked on a couples house who were both pilots . They explained the cause , describing it as similar to a boat on waves as the plane goes through air currents and how much stress the air frame can take . It was reassuring. I'd be a lot more worried by any body shouting " Allah u'akbar " than turbulence though ! Good luck keeping the toddlers entertained , my wife's done it twice on her own with just the one . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmjg Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 Reverse psychology DM,most people read my suggestions and do the opposite,which is normally advisable!I cant stand flying,the check in,queues ,no smoking(caught in the toilets once for shame!),£79 for a cup of tea in the airport etc,like i say,altho i'm arsing about,i do hope the girl has a good and uneventful flight Every flight ive ever been on i spend importuning, walking round the toilet block because i cant sleep:mad:,and cursing everyone who IS asleep!:wink: I travelled 1 way with a 3 year old, flight very smooth, but after 20 odd hours I would have liked to be both drunk & stoned! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chortlepuss Posted December 31, 2012 Share Posted December 31, 2012 I am terrified of turbulence and have a mantra that I read by some pilot who described it as 'driving a car along a bumpy road' You will probably get some kind of turbulence on such a long flight. I have met 3 people now who have experienced the 'plane diving' thing and I think I would wet myself with fear :shocked: The only thing I have found that helped was a rule I set myself which said all is OK when the cabin staff are mobile. They fly thousands of miles, and if they're more concerned with flogging you tatt/distributing beers than strapping themselves in, then I think there is no imminent concern. Doesn't help when they are recalled to their seats immediately, but minimises the amount of panic time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maruska Posted January 1, 2013 Share Posted January 1, 2013 I just want to wish you a smooth flight, can`t help with the fear of flying but other`s advice about hypnosis seems reasonable. I can, however, give some tips for flying with kids:wink:. We flew over the Atlantic from US - and back- every year since our kids were born. 1) most important make sure they are healthy, especially no ear infections ( would be painful as hell when the pressure changes) when in doubt, see a doctor couple days before flight and nip anything that might be lurking in the bud 2) LOADS of new toys - small, inexpensive things - and give it to the one by one so there is always a surprise waiting in the bag:biggrin: - we took sticker sheets, mini coloring books with crayons, matching game cards, mini books, magnifying glass ( plastic, cost me 20 cents and they played with it for almost 3 hours!) 3) if you have, portable DVD player with favorite DVD`s - and maybe 1 new we had a tablet with us, my husband downloaded games, tales, etc before the flight and it was a life saver 4) don`t worry too much about your kids disturbing other travelers, usually they behave better than you expect ( well, I kinda expect the worst:chatterbox:) and I found people to be very tolerant on the whole, as far as they can see that you are trying your best:biggrin: It would be great if you could let us know how it went. Have an uneventful and safe journey:wubclub: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NicF Posted January 1, 2013 Share Posted January 1, 2013 I can't help with the fear of flying thing either, but the tips about flying with toddlers are great and the kind of things we did with ours. The only other thing I would add is also take snacks. Probably best to avoid things full of sugar, but if you're kids are anything like mine they may refuse to eat anything apart from jelly babies for the whole journey so don't get too caught up in that, but make sure you have some of their favourite foods handy for on the flight. And a water bottle that you can fill up on the plane or at the gate is handy as well. Just make sure it's empty when you go through security or they will take it off you (if you go via Singapore they have security at the gates). Just one other point to make - I've flown to and from Australia seven and a half times and I have never experienced anything like you have in the way of turbulance. I've never experienced it on any of the other flights I've taken from the UK either. It's a pretty rare event and you would have to be very unlucky to have something like that happen again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
starlight7 Posted January 1, 2013 Share Posted January 1, 2013 I detest flying too- have also experienced a bad flight where the passengers spontaneously clapped when we landed safely. This is in 40 plus years of flying though! Gives you the willies. I take travel sick tablets because they calm you down a bit without knocking you out. I always think if God had meant us to fly - He would have given us wings. Daft, aren't I ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
newjez Posted January 1, 2013 Share Posted January 1, 2013 If you want a good flight, then the first thing you do is order a bloody Mary It's the first thing I do when they bring the drinks trolley around. I've flown dozens of times, and the only time I had a bad flight was when I forgot the bloody Mary - we had a hard landing in fog at the wrong airport. Never made that mistake again. Always order a bloody Mary and everything will go smoothly. My sister was on that British airways plane 30 odd years ago that flew through the volcanic ash and plummeted 30,000 feet. (She didn't order a bloody Mary). It took her 20 years, but she's flying again. I couldn't say she enjoys it, but she grits her teeth and gets on with it. It's amazing what you'll do to get away from teenage kids for a couple of weeks. She always orders a bloody Mary now as soon as she sits down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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