bunbury61 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Your brothers and sisters and family members ......that are putting in a double shiftS 365 days a year .....whether that be taking your mom or dad shopping .......taking the multiple phone calls .....helping out with bills .......hospital appointments etc ..... Just bare in mind , whilst you are living your life .......whether you love your life in Australia , or not ......someone is doing your shift .......HAPPY NEW YEAR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Your brothers and sisters and family members ......that are putting in a double shiftS 365 days a year .....whether that be taking your mom or dad shopping .......taking the multiple phone calls .....helping out with bills .......hospital appointments etc ..... Just bare in mind , whilst you are living your life .......whether you love your life in Australia , or not ......someone is doing your shift .......HAPPY NEW YEAR I'd never thought of it as a shift when my brother wasnt' there ... No-one in the UK to do the shift with my dad now at all but I'm still the only one from my brother and I who phones, emails, writes and sends gifts throughout the year. Is that how you see it Bunbury as doing someone elses shifts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Every year is a good year here in god's country. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest30085 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Well isn't that a lovely Christmas cheer, but it could include anyone overseas and not just in Australia . . . what about the lads and lasses overseas in the forces who are trying to keep your country safe, well remember guys you are not taking your turn fielding the phone calls or out buying veggies for your oldies so I hope you feel really guilty even though you are saving my ass . . Does that sound stupid? Then I think I've got the correct idea of this thread :wacko: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest30085 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Also, how about your time in Australia . . Did you take your turn then? No, as you were off being selfish and putting yourself first apparently Pot and kettle comes to mind Bunbury. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunbury61 Posted December 29, 2012 Author Share Posted December 29, 2012 Also, how about your time in Australia . . Did you take your turn then? No, as you were off being selfish and putting yourself first apparently Pot and kettle comes to mind Bunbury. thought i might touch i nerve with some ......for the record i have spent 18 years, YES 18 looking after mom and dad .......my two brothers are in australia ......pot and kettle .....selfish on my part ......hhhhm ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bunbury61 Posted December 29, 2012 Author Share Posted December 29, 2012 Every year is a good year here in god's country. Oh dear ......when someone labours a point that strongly .....i begin to worry Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Oh dear ......when someone labours a point that strongly .....i begin to worry i sure don't need your worry. Whinging poms are not high on my Xmas card list. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ali Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 thought i might touch i nerve with some ......for the record i have spent 18 years, YES 18 looking after mom and dad .......my two brothers are in australia ......pot and kettle .....selfish on my part ......hhhhm ? So is this a message to your siblings? For my dads sake I wish my brother would be in touch with him more - but he isn't and that's the way it is, it's his choice and he may have some regret about that in later years who knows. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest30085 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 You are calling everyone selfish for moving abroad, yet you did the same? So please explain how you doing it, is different to anyone else? For the record, you haven't touched a nerve as I'm still in the UK and still live within a mile or so of Mum and Dad, I just really don't understand your post when you did exactly that same thing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest51810 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Can see why people would be a bit offended with this Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaska Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 How lovely to deliberately try to pile on guilt to your fellow forum members - many of whom are struggling and homesick. Hope you're pleased with that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest51810 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 How lovely to deliberately try to pile on guilt to your fellow forum members - many of whom are struggling and homesick. Hope you're pleased with that. I agree. Its a bit insensitive and dont see the aim of the thread. Maybe even if it had been worded better. When i read it i only see it as a dig to people who have moved. Its definitely a bad time of the year and a lot of people are going to feel extra sensitive Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ramot Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 What a strange thread. Not all of us olds are in our dotage and need looking after. We retired to Australia when we were 60, with no family here, as all our 3 were in UK. but we had always wanted to live here and were up for the challenge. So strangely we were the ones to up sticks and leave the young ones behind!!!! Been here for 10 years and still don't need to be taken shopping etc. Will face any problems when and if they arise. Know many here who are in their 80's who have no family near, and they certainly don't feel bitter or neglected, and if there is a problem, there is a tremendous community spirit here to help out. If it was your choice to spend 18 years looking after your parents, then it was exactly that; your choice; good on you, but I would hate to think that any of mine would have to do that and feel so angry about it. Obviously don't know your personal circumstances, but please don't lay the guilt onto every one else. We all make our own decisions about how to live our lives. Our offspring never made us feel guilty for moving to Australia, I think they are actually quite proud of us, and incidentally 2 have followed us here, which they might never have done if we hadn't come first. Unless all our children live only minutes away from us in our old age, then the likelihood of the closest one having to take on the most to help is obvious, and in this day and age, very few families live close to each other, whether in the next town, county or on the other side of the world. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freckleface Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Your brothers and sisters and family members ......that are putting in a double shiftS 365 days a year .....whether that be taking your mom or dad shopping .......taking the multiple phone calls .....helping out with bills .......hospital appointments etc ..... Just bare in mind , whilst you are living your life .......whether you love your life in Australia , or not ......someone is doing your shift .......HAPPY NEW YEAR If you have issues with your siblings perhaps you should take it up with them directly. It would be more effective than venting your frustrations on a bunch of strangers on here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pablo Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Put the big kenny Everett preacher hand away bunbury,and stop patting yerself on the back eh,self praise is never good. i wont make it to Aus now by the looks of it,but when my bro knew i was planning on going the last thought on his mind was the CHORE of looking after me arl fellah,we spoke about it when me mam was alive,he was just glad for me that i WAS going to Aus. Thankfully my bro doesnt have a begrudging nature like some it seems Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dmjg Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 All my siblings live within an hour of me, I'll make sure to pass on your greetings. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
munchbaby99 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Wow, bunbury have the 4 ghosts visited you yet? What a ridiculous thread to start, feel better do you?? I know we aren't allowed to personally insult on here as its against the forum rules, but WOW............I'm definitely thinking something right now Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
munchbaby99 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Btw, my sister is in Australia and I don't feel anyway that a shift is being taken for her. Luckily our parents are still quite young but I get up north when I can and they come to me and yet we never have discussions about the 'selfish bint' that fell in love with an Australian and made a decision to move over there! Ridiculous, absolutely ridiculous..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maruska Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Please don`t criticize people who decided to move, you don`t know what circumstances made them to do that. I have been out of my home country for 12 years now. There was a better work opportunity abroad. Than I met my husband who is from a country different to mine and wouldn`t be able to find a job if I dragged him back there. We moved to the US and my parents come to visit every year, we go to them every year too for a month. Do I worry about what the future might bring? You bet... they are still young ( 56 and 62) but I realize they will need help in the future. I have my own kids now to look after as well. I have a brother who lives close to them. I do feel guilt sometime - yesterday was my mom`s birthday and we skyped, I was sorry I wasn`t there to celebrate with her. My parents are not bitter about it however, they do understand why it would be quite impossible for us to have a decent life there. They have their own life, friends, activities, in fact they are going to Prague to spend the weekend as my mom`s birthday treat:biggrin:. Not being close to your parentsgeographically doesn`t mean we don`t love them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest26012 Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Your brothers and sisters and family members ......that are putting in a double shiftS 365 days a year .....whether that be taking your mom or dad shopping .......taking the multiple phone calls .....helping out with bills .......hospital appointments etc ..... Just bare in mind , whilst you are living your life .......whether you love your life in Australia , or not ......someone is doing your shift .......HAPPY NEW YEAR None of my siblings do anything for my mum! In fact I'm the only one that phones her, and I'm in oz, they in the uk! None of your business anyhow tbh! Every family is different! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BritChickx Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 Well whilst everyones out partying.....think of poor old BC riding her bike in the wind and rain, helping those poor old ladies and men lol. Some new years this is gonna be! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wellers and Whitehead Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 I see where you are coming from. My Mum is doing 'shifts' for her siblings that live in London and Sydney. She doesn't mind but does wish they would input a little more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Addy Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 I have no brothers or sisters and both my parents are dead. I feel left out! :cool: Edit, to the Op just be happy your parents are still alive to be cared for, imagine what they would think if they saw your post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harpodom Posted December 29, 2012 Share Posted December 29, 2012 You've certainly touched a nerve with this one bunbury! Some very defensive replies. Bottom line is that who ever sticks around near elderly relatives usually cops it with having to take care of them, then handle their affairs when they die. Thats just real life. My uncle emigrated to Canada in the 1960s, has lived in Israel and now the US, he's had an amazing life you might say. Meanwhile my dad was left to look after his mum, uncles, aunts all on his tod, continues to be the main point of contact for his 99 year old uncle, so if he has a fall, or gets ill, its dad who has to sort him out. My dad is 77. You can't have your cake AND eat it, either live the dream and live with some guilt or stay at home and look after the olds! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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