one month in brisbane and want to go home

[tfarrell]

I feel so helpless

Our stuff only arrived today and I spent the day crying

I just want to go home

Kids miss family and I just feel so guilty

Did everyone go through this

If I was handed a ticket home I would be gone

Husband still hasn't got job.. he's applied for anything goin

And rang up places asking for work.. still nothing

Feel really horrible

[devon67]

do you have a job yet?

[tfarrell]

I'm at home with our 1 year old.. we are flying through our savings and I just feel lost.

[B1K3R]

The first 2 months are the most difficult and most stressful. You're not settled yet, no jobs and naturally right now you want to be at home where everything feels safe and comfortable.

 

It's a phase that most have to go through when moving. I remember freaking out until I found a job and felt settled. I remember that we had used all our money and I was in the garden desperate, not knowing what to do and praying for help. I remember 15 minutes later I got a call from a recruiter. 3 days later I started working.

 

Keep doing your best to find a job as that's the most important thing, then things will start falling in place. But remain calm as otherwise nothing will help. If you're meant to be there, things will work out.

 

Good luck!

Edited September 5, 2012 by B1K3R

[tfarrell]

Thanks for that... am hoping its just a phase.. really do as the place seems lively.. and my god the weather is great.. but without the people that matter it just seems wasted on me and the kids.. what did I think it would be like.. din ask.. I thought I'd be grand..

.

[sioban]

Things will get better once your husband gets work, my partner is a carpenter and managed to get work by applying for everything going and also just going to construction sites and asking if there is work and who to contact. Where are you living? We are Northside, if you want to meet up for a chat just send me a message.

[tfarrell]

We are renting in aspley.. he tried a few sites alright and recruitment agencies too but nothing.. most don't even reply.. he's a great cv too but I just think things are tight at the min.. I just feel like I want to go home.. and the longer we stay the more money we are loosing

[louwexford]

Hi t, things will settle, we are moving west of brisbane to chinchilla, a small town in January, I lived in oz 20 years ago, and cried for a solid 3 months, its just the transition of not seeing your family, work wise I cant advise you, has you husband any experience in civil construction, shuttering ect., he should try the major construction companies, leightons ect. We are moving to a small town, and whilist it wasnt my first choice, I feel that we can blend and adapt much quicker. my husband is there already and the girl behind the bar is from wexford! he loves it, but the 16 year old may be a problem.! what age are your kids, anyway girl chin up, its better being there than looking out the window with no future, which unfortunately ireland, none of us really want to leave but we have to for our sakes and the sake of our kids. pm if you need any help with anything

[sioban]

We are renting in aspley.. he tried a few sites alright and recruitment agencies too but nothing.. most don't even reply.. he's a great cv too but I just think things are tight at the min.. I just feel like I want to go home.. and the longer we stay the more money we are loosing

 

Things will get better in time, once you get work everything will fall into place. When we first arrived and I wasn't working I tried to get out and meet as many people as I could, helping at school etc. My partner and I both landed jobs through people we met, I practically fell into my job as one of the Mum's at the school my kids went to told me her husband had a job vacancy in his business and I would be perfect for it. I was really fortunate but know that if I hadn't made the effort to get myself out there I wouldn't have my job.

[Jackinabox]

Not ideal but could help if you use sites like this to get some money in. Good luck. Guntree has similar.

 

http://www.servicecentral.com.au/jobs-board/Carpentry-_c67/Aspley-_l10396/

Edited September 5, 2012 by Jackinabox

[Guest liddell92]

Hope things work out for you :smile:

[Guest Guest63690]

Hi tfarrel. I really feel for you. You sound very lost and scared. Are there any counselling phone lines in Oz. Many years ago I rang the samaritans, when I was going through a huge crisis (I was not suicidal, just desperate), and I poured out my heart to a neutral ear for an hour, bawling at times. By the end of the call, I felt loads better and started to see a way forward. I will keep my fingers crossed you find what ever helps you get through the tough time you are having. And I will keep my fingers crossed a job comes along as I am sure that will make a massive difference to how you are feeling.

[Guest jckc]

I remember the exact same emotions when we moved to Perth in 2008. We lasted about 6 months and then we came home. But now the way things are going i wish we'd stayed in Perth.....

 

I actually settled the best out of the 5 of us, i got a good job and although i missed my family i was able to see them using the internet or talk to them on the phone. I actually talked to them a lot more than usual!

 

So anyway, here we are back in the miserable uk! We hardly ever see family members and the reasons we left in the first place are all still here!!!

 

You do find that people get on with their own lives and at the end of the day you have to do what's best for you and more importantly the children.

 

Good luck and please don't come back!!! (i mean that in a nice way)

[TheGreatDane]

Sorry to hear.

 

Look at it the way JCKC put it, above:

 

would you rather be miserable in a sunny and scenic place surrounded by your nearest and dearest?

 

or

 

miserable in one of the world's most miserable countries, going into 6 months of grim weather and another 3-5 years of austerity? The Olympic good feel factor will only last another week or so.

 

I've lived in Brisbane (been in the UK on and off for 10 years) and I know where I'd rather be.

 

Buy some nice steaks from Coles for dinner and all will be well.

 

I'm moving out to Sydney myself and can't bloody wait.

 

The UK has turned into something quite grim.

[Guest jckc]

The Great Dane speaks the truth!

 

Also......It's a big move you've made and it's a shock to the system! Just hang in there and give it your best shot!

 

Believe me, i found out the hard way!

[Guest]

Sorry to hear.

 

Look at it the way JCKC put it, above:

 

would you rather be miserable in a sunny and scenic place surrounded by your nearest and dearest?

 

or

 

miserable in one of the world's most miserable countries, going into 6 months of grim weather and another 3-5 years of austerity? The Olympic good feel factor will only last another week or so.

 

I've lived in Brisbane (been in the UK on and off for 10 years) and I know where I'd rather be.

 

Buy some nice steaks from Coles for dinner and all will be well.

 

I'm moving out to Sydney myself and can't bloody wait.

 

The UK has turned into something quite grim.

 

 

Really?. God I wish it was that simple :no:

[calNgary]

Hi tfarrell

 

Hang on in there, the first few months are most definately the hardest and it doesnt help not knowing the system, area,food,people etc etc,, it really is a lot to digest.

Has hubby looked for any other type of work? Often getting that first job is the hardest,so if he could get a few months aussie experience doing something else ,it may help.

It's also not unheard of to offer your services for free for a day or two ,so the prospective employer knows how good your work is.

 

Keep an eye on gumtree, shop windows and the local papers as lots of smaller companies advertise this way rather than the big sites.

 

I hope something comes up soon,big hugs and keep smiling

 

Cal x

[tfarrell]

Thanks so much for all your replies.. it deffo helps.. my husband is going to try driving buses as they are looking for people.. fingers crossed.. its just me.. I have that gut feeling I've made the wrong decision.. I just feel like um stuck here and can't go home.. we sold up hook line and sinker in Ireland and my husband has slim chance if getting work there

.

[Rupert]

I think it is all down to the job situation and once you have that sorted the rest will start to fall into place. To make things more tolerable for yourself in the meantime, try to accept that going through savings was a natural part of the emmigration process ... and it is true too.

 

I honestly cannot relate to feeling upset the whole time in those early days, although we did not feel settled and were not skipping around with joy either. Hang in there.

[Guest katehealthwise]

Hi, i'm just wondering what you do for a job? Hopefully i can be of some help to you. My husband is a carpenter also and he is also finding it difficult to get regular work as he is self employed. A good tip is to do up some flyers and post them around the area you live and local businesses, my husband did this and has managed to get a few jobs from this. Every little bit helps. good luck

Edited September 5, 2012 by Munchkinella
Removed web link.

[whatsitallabout]

I remember feeling just like that when we 1st arrived, the 1st 6 months were hell for me, just wanted to go back home savings were going down the pan, was so depressed. Got involved in the kids school started making friends learnt to shop on a budget very fast. Once the job happens it makes a huge difference trust me. 3 years later are very happy here. What your feeling & what your emotions are going through are pretty normal. Most people have gone through the same. I am sooooo glad that I gave it a chance & didn't rush back, it does get easier once you have security of our job. I sent cv after cv to many many employers, it took me 8 months to land a job but I never gave up. Good Luck x

[sioban]

I remember feeling just like that when we 1st arrived, the 1st 6 months were hell for me, just wanted to go back home savings were going down the pan, was so depressed. Got involved in the kids school started making friends learnt to shop on a budget very fast. Once the job happens it makes a huge difference trust me. 3 years later are very happy here. What your feeling & what your emotions are going through are pretty normal. Most people have gone through the same. I am sooooo glad that I gave it a chance & didn't rush back, it does get easier once you have security of our job. I sent cv after cv to many many employers, it took me 8 months to land a job but I never gave up. Good Luck x

 

 

I have to say that I've never wanted to go back home so far, even when things have been tough as I don't want to uproot kids again ( and fortunately they love it here). Totally agree with whatsitallabout, get involved with the school, shop at Aldi and make the most of being able to spend time outside with the kids. We decided before we came here that even if it wasn't working out we would stay until we got citizenship before making any move back home as it's taken years and loads of money to get us to where we are, if nothing else it would save our kids having to go the process if we went back to the UK.

[Surf N Turf]

I've moved between oz and the UK an embarrassing number of times and i've learned to expect little but stress, doubt and unhappiness for the first 6 months. It wasn't always that long but it was never far short. It's HARD. But please give it some time so that any future moves are made with a clear head and are less likely to lead to regrets. Ping-ponging is costly and exhausting and best avoided if possible. IMO anyway. Wishing you all the best.

[Alaska]

Hi there again

I know I've said it before but please feel free to give me a shout.

There is a great support network on your doorstep and a lot of people have been through the same thing as you and some still are.

I am sure we were in the same fb group but I haven't seen you there for a while.

Anyway there is a playgroup a lot of us go to at South Pine Community Church on Fridays at 9.30am.

We also meet on most Tuesdays in different parks (were in John Goss Reserve right near you this week).

We have some weekend meets and occasional nights out too.

 

You are not alone in all of this. It is daunting and we all have our moments.

Hope we can meet up and help you with all of this!

xx

[Aussie Abroad]

Not quite the same, but we moved to Malaysia from Brisbane and found it really useful to not think about it as a forever thing, but to put a time limit on it. We decided that if, after 3 years we still weren't 100% happy here, that we would move home. So, while we've had a great time living in Asia and travelling all over the world, we've decided to move home next year. I know things aren't great in Ireland at the moment, but things will eventually pick up again, and in a few years moving back might be a real possibility.

 

In the mean time, this http://www.brisbane-australia.com/free-stuff-to-do.html is a bit of a list of free stuff to do in and around Brissy, so it might help to try and get out and do some things and see what is great about living in the Sunshine State. :biggrin: