What to do about my girlfriend?

[Guest CantSurf]

hey all,

 

i think iv got myself into a bit of a problem - iv told my girlfriend that im only going to oz for 10 months but im staying!! i have a job lined up and everythings sorted - im not sure to try and get her to move out there with me or not tell until im meant to be coming back

 

does this sound a bit harsh?

 

Mark

[Guest traybears]

JUST BE HONEST.GOOD LUCK.

[Guest billy braveheart]

Hi Mark

 

Yes I think it sounds a bit harsh poor girl. I obviously don't know your circumstances how long you have been in the relationship etc & it really is upto you wether you want the relationship to continue but if you don't please tell her you aren't coming back its only fair.

 

Good Luck

 

Janette

[keily]

Oh Dear What A Prob - I Always Say Honesty Is The Best Policy As Things Like This Always Have A Way Of Coming Back And "biting You On The Bum" Lol

If You Are In Long Term Relationship Why Not Give Her The Chance To Go Or Not .... After All Her Life Will Be On Hold For 10 Months Waiting For You To Come Back - Which Is Not Fair On Her ! It Does Sound Like You Have Made This Decision Yourself Which Would Indicate You Have Not Been Together That Long So Maybe Better To Cut Ties And See How Things Develop For You Both ... If Its Meant To Be Then You Will Find A Way . Good Luck With Whatever You Decide

Mrs Keily

[Guest Impatient]

Sounds like you are not sure what you want, so going over there without making any decisions seems sensible to me. Either you get there, decide you can't live without her and ship her out, or you get there, decide it is not meant to be and then break it off.

 

Just make sure you give the girl a good holiday though, eh?

[Guest CantSurf]

thanks for the replies!

 

iv been with her for 6 months but i had planned this before we got together and iv neva really got round to telling her the truth ( she might get abit angry)

 

mark

[Guest SAINTHURLOCK]

hey all,

 

i think iv got myself into a bit of a problem - iv told my girlfriend that im only going to oz for 10 months but im staying!! i have a job lined up and everythings sorted - im not sure to try and get her to move out there with me or not tell until im meant to be coming back

 

does this sound a bit harsh?

 

Mark

I think the fact your even contemplating doing a Lord Lucan on her and the fact your asking a bunch of strangers on a website for moral guidance pretty much answers all questions.

Say your goodbyes and enjoy Oz as a single man.....lucky sod ;0)

[The Broughtons]

I think the fact your even contemplating doing a Lord Lucan on her and the fact your asking a bunch of strangers on a website for moral guidance pretty much answers all questions.

Say your goodbyes and enjoy Oz as a single man.....lucky sod ;0)

 

I'm inclined to agree with you on this one!

 

The fact that you have been planning this since before your relationship started and you haven't discussed it with her doesn't bode well for the future. If you were deadly serious about this girl and the relationship was long term, you would already have discussed it with her IMO.

[ali]

Tell her now, be up front and tell her that you have the opportunity of staying on if you like it. You're going to starting a whole new part of your life - decision time.

 

Ali

[Guest EM&M]

M's mate did this, he had a perm visa (had took 2 years to get) and he met someone at Christmas. He was due to go out the following Sept but told her he was only going for a year or so. She went out in the December as she missed him etc on a ETA. She ended up staying 4 & half years but was very home sick and eventually she left and went back to the UK. Moral of story was it was a waste of the 4 years really for both of them due to the fact it was his dream & not hers. She was there cos he wanted to be there and she wanted to be with him (if you get me), but she would rather have been in the UK, she didnt want to have a baby in Oz etc without her family etc.

 

If only he had told her in the beginning is plans so that she could have made an informed decision on wheather or not to go with him in the long term. He is still in Sydney and had no intention of following her back to the UK.

 

Be honest, everyone deserves that, Im sure that you would if the rolls were reversed.

 

Good Luck

 

Em x

[calNgary]

Must agree with the majority here and say tell her now.If you want a relationship with this girl starting offf with a lie isnt the ideal way,,if she comes with you itll stop you being lonely if she chooses not too ,go play the field boy !!!

Cal x