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Found 8 results

  1. Guest

    Regret returning to the UK?

    This is a long thread, so be warned!!! I returned to the UK last year after moving to Sydney with my husband and 2 children in 2007 – I only lasted 7 months. One of my problems was that I could not get a job as my UK teaching qualification was not recognised by the NSW Education Department (despite being used to get the PR visa!!). The only way to fix this was to go back to uni and do more study. My husband quickly got a job but I earn more and my wages were really needed. We had also put our son into kindergarten as soon as a place came up and kept him there as I got some supply work in a private school and we thought that I would soon be working properly… This meant that we were still using our savings despite a wage coming in. I had a couple of great interviews with some private schools, but no job. Another issue was that my husband has a sister and her family there as well as some aunts, uncles and cousins and their families. I had met them all on previous visits to Oz and when they came here and they are all nice enough, but they have their own lives and families to think about and we never really became a part of that. I missed my family and I really felt a complete lack of support networks while I was there, it was like all the scaffolding of my life had fallen away. I felt isolated, alone and literally like I was on another planet, away from everything I knew. Also my 11 year old daughter (not my husband’s daughter) got terribly homesick and unfortunately, the first lot of friends she made were particularly unpleasant girls who made her life hell. As my husband felt that things were coming together nicely with his job, family, beautiful suburb, lifestyle we were living etc, he just stuck his head in the sand and got extremely annoyed if my daughter or I got upset or expressed any sentiments about going home or regretting being in Australia, he felt we weren’t doing enough to make ourselves settle To cut a really long story short, it was when my sister-in-law (who interfered a lot, she sponsored us, so kind of acted like she owned us) suggested I seek professional help because I felt down, that I realised maybe I was in the wrong place and should come home. It ended up with me and the children coming back and my husband refusing to. I had quite a nasty, lecturing email from my sister-in-law, who knew about 5% of the facts and the whole of my husband’s family now think I returned to the UK because my daughter didn’t like Australia. Anyway, when I first got back here, I was so relieved and happy and quickly got a job and a house to rent. My husband and I had a few shaky months but he eventually decided to join us back in the UK four months after we had first left Oz. He has a job here now and we are still trying to work out what went wrong between us and the whole emigration thing. My daughter is now in the same school as before we went to Oz with the same friends and sees her aunt and uncle and nanny now (she doesn't seem to view my husband's family as her own) and our son is in the same nursery as before. But it isn’t the same. I realise that I actually probably could live with seeing my family once or twice a year. I hardly ever see my friends. It’s cold and dark and expensive. The people here look miserable and poor, the streets look dirty and poor. Maybe I couldn’t see it before, maybe it got worse while I was away. When I first got back I couldn’t even get any Income Support until I got a job as I was told I was not a habitual resident of this country! I really miss Australia and I regret coming back. Obviously my husband really does not want to be here. I work in a school where half the kids come from homes on benefits and have no intention of working themselves and have no respect for themselves (I have a couple of Year 10 and 11 mums-to-be in my classes) or anyone else ( I frequently get told to f**k off) and just despair at where it will all end. We are talking about going back and I am doing an OU course to get my qualifications sorted out and think that if I can get a job when we go back, at least I'll be out of the house and busy and I will meet people and start forming a network. I could also do some hobbies or something and my son will be starting primary school soon, so I can make friends with other moms. I think I did kind of think that my husband's family would go out of their way for us and realise now, I could have done more for myself. Has anyone else experienced this kind of dilemma? Gone back and it's worked out? If we do go back, I'd be more scared than before because so much is riding on it this time. I don't think my husband would allow me to take my son out of the country again if I couldn't settle. Also my daughter really doesn't want to go back and it causes a lot of stress if we talk about it - she says she'll come back to the UK as soon as she's 18 - I couldn't bear that - but I'm sure in the long run she'd be okay. My family are hot and cold all the time, sometimes saying I'd be mad to go back after everything that's happened at other times saying get the hell out of here while you can. Who would have thought that trying to get 'A New Life Down Under' could be so traumatic? :wacko:
  2. Guest51810

    do you regret it?

    Hey everyone im wanting to hear from people who have left their pets behind for whatever reason do you regret it? I have two staffies, one is coming up for 10years old and the other will be 8. They have their good days and bad days where they act like a pup and other times act like they are 20 lol. We want to move to oz next year if we get the chance but basically i know in my heart that eric ( the oldest one ) wont be able to come, I just dont think he would make it on the flight and quarantine. He gets stressed very easily, if he even hears a bang he goes crazy, firework night is a nightmare and he has to go to the vets for tablets. He also has a heartmurmur but its not a serious one according to the last time he got checked. Apart from that he is generally healthy. I just dont think it would be fair on him to go through all that, hes never even been in a boarding kennel. My other dog lucy is full of life, shes hyper and a typical staffy but she loves eric to bits and i think shed be heartbroken if they were split up although makes friends easily. Shes also very nosey and she has a hunting instinct but she never catches anything, i worry shed be bitten with a snake or something! I just keep thinking about it even though we havent even applied for a visa yet, I feel like a horrible person for even thinking about leaving them, i keep thinking maybe i should just wait untill they've gone but that could be a long time ( that probably sounds horrible, its not meant to! ) I just worry the day comes that dave gets offered a job and i have to make a choice of wether to go without them or stay here. Daves mum wants to take them to stay with her, they love it there. she has a big garden and she spoils them ( probably too much!) she treats them like proper grandchildren. My mum also loves them to bits but she stays in a flat and also has a elderly dog so cant keep them. Anyway sorry for rambling on, basically just want to hear from people who have left their pets behind so i can make a choice, or even from people who have brought elderly pets over cheers
  3. now I know we should be grateful to welcome with open arms to all our friends and family arriving from the UK to visit us for holidays now that we have moved down under..........but seriously, we have had a constant stream since december last year. Has anyone else been subjected to this? don't get me wrong its lovely to see them all come (and go) but it costs a fortune, they borrow your car, they moan about the price of everything and eat all your food!! It's driving me crackers :arghh:............ i just want some PEACE AND QUIET!! ..........now I feel really guilty for saying that, especially when they have paid a fortune to come and see us :wacko:
  4. Now that "its official news" that we have booked our flights to go to Oz, people are asking when is the party. We are not having one!! Not because we dont have any friends lol but we are not fussy or showy people and would just like to say "see you soon" over dinner etc. I have been to 2 leaving parties (close friends off to Spain) and the emotion of it was terrible but now we see them often on their trips back and have skype parties lol and its easier to say "see you later/chat later". My Mum and Dad were £10 poms so understand but think we are too scared (emotionally) to have one and I think they are probably right. Will we regret not having one? Did you regret it? Mandy
  5. Hi Trying to go through our stuff at the moment to cull / sell / donate before the big move! What sort of stuff did you regret not taking to oz with you? thanks LauLau:smile:
  6. Hiya what items do you regret leaving behind at home - is there anything you wish you had bought before you went that you kicked yourself for when you got to Oz:unsure:
  7. Guest

    Was it all worth it??

    To all those who have returned or returning to the UK was emigrating worth it for you. I have been thinking lately about the life I would or could have been living in the UK if we hadn’t emigrated. Although Australia has been good to us in many ways, others not so good I do wonder sometimes about the opportunity cost (not just financially) of being here. What have I missed out on by being in Oz so long and has it been worth it. For me, emigrating has given me an appreciation of what we had in the UK, family, friends, ease of travel to different and interesting places in the UK and other countries, good job with a clear career path, choice and variety for pretty much anything. When I look back I’m not sure it was worth giving all those things up for a big house and the “Aussie lifestyle”. I know you shouldn’t look back at the past with regret but it’s hard not too sometimes when you want to go home so badly. Be interesting to hear what others think.
  8. Hi all Still thinking Narangba (mainly down to house prices). But does anyone regret living here instead of elsewhere? Just a bit worried its too out in the middle of nowhere with absolutely nothing happening. Recently read about certain areas lacking a sense of community so anyone have a point of view about Narangbas community? We did want to try and find somewhere with a town centre rather like where we come from in England but Hervey Bay seems a little isolated. Does anyone know of a cheapish neighbourhood with an actual centre and decent schools? Preferably on the North side (thats if Narangba proves not to be siutable). I am stressing out now and cant get my head round it all. Basically can anyone put my mind at rest by telling me Narangba is GREAT:chatterbox:!!! Help
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