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Found 16 results

  1. A DWARF porn star who was Gordon Ramsay's double has been found dead in the most bizarre of circumstances, according to UK tabloid The Sunday Sport. Percy Foster's 107cm body was discovered in a badger's den in Wales. The report says the 35-year-old was found, "deep in an underground chamber by Ministry of Agriculture experts ahead of a planned badger-gassing program." Investigators have not ruled out the possibility of suicide, according to the report. In a recent interview Foster spoke of his excitement about his growing career as Ramsay's double. "Porn lookalikes get more money than normal actors. Dwarf lookalikes are as rare as hen's teeth and so can command top dollar.
  2. Leeannetricia

    Gordon in Canberra- a good place to stay????

    Hi, been browsing online for places to stay! Gordon came up with some of my requirements(somewhere where I can rent and take my dogs) Is it a nice place to stay!and what's public transport like- or cycling to city?? Thanks leeanne
  3. Hi, I have a job in CBD but as the only one with a job on arrival we need to try and spend as little as poss on rent to begin with, but with 8am to 6pm working hours I dont really want to do any more than an hours commute each way. Does anyone live in any of these suburbs - Hornsby, Warrongha, Gordon, Turramurra, Lindfield, Roseville? I used to do a door-to-door sales job in Sydney when I was a backpacker and if I remember rightly these suburbs were quite nice. And from a quick look at real estate the house seem to be a good $100-$200 cheaper than the more southern suburbs on the North Shore. We are in our mid 20's, have no kids but will be bringing our two dogs (hence why an apartment in the city is not an option!!). Is it quite easy to drive across Ku-ring-gai National Park to Northern Beaches? Are their cafes / restaurants and shopping areas in these suburbs? Is the 45-60min (depending on which location) commute by train detailed on City Rail accurate (I need to get off at Town Hall Station). Any idea of prices? Can you buy a season ticket? Any other advice / tips would be much appreciated. Danielle xx
  4. Hi, I have a job in CBD but as the only one with a job on arrival we need to try and spend as little as poss on rent to begin with, but with 8am to 6pm working hours I dont really want to do any more than an hours commute each way. Does anyone live in any of these suburbs - Hornsby, Warrongha, Gordon, Turramurra, Lindfield, Roseville? I used to do a door-to-door sales job in Sydney when I was a backpacker and if I remember rightly these suburbs were quite nice. And from a quick look at real estate the house seem to be a good $100-$200 cheaper than the more southern suburbs on the North Shore. We are in our mid 20's, have no kids but will be bringing our two dogs (hence why an apartment in the city is not an option!!). Is it quite easy to drive across Ku-ring-gai National Park to Northern Beaches? Are their cafes / restaurants and shopping areas in these suburbs? Is the 45-60min (depending on which location) commute by train detailed on City Rail accurate (I need to get off at Town Hall Station). Any idea of prices? Can you buy a season ticket? Any other advice / tips would be much appreciated. Danielle xx
  5. Hi, I was feeling quite confident but after reading some of the threads on PIO... I'm in need of a bit of reassurance.. or reality...!! Myself and my partner are moving to Sydney 1st September. I will be working in Belrose and Teresa is working in Bondi Junction... both on 457 visas with existing employers... My salary is $75k including a car and hers is $65k We are looking at renting in Gordon / Pymble... 2 questions.. Are our salaries sufficient to rent in Gordon / Pymble... and... what are those areas like to live in..? Thanks! Glyn :biggrin:
  6. Guest

    £70K for Gordon Brown

    Mail on Sunday Gordon Brown to earn £70k per speach in USA. If I had the money I would pay him more than that, but he would have to go further away. How about the antartic for a couple of years. Maybe it would take £70k to jog his memory as to how he f**ked up the country.?
  7. KIRK AND CO

    Gordon Brown

    I could not stand that man glad he lost. Allways thought cameron would win :yellow_guy_smiling_
  8. Johnson Beharry, Victoria Cross hero, refuses to shake Gordon Brown's hand - Telegraph I remember saying in a previous post about Brown and how dis- interested he was at the ceremony. I hope this could be another nail in his coffin. Now the a*sh**e has written to the guy expressing his respect! ELECTION YEAR!!:arghh:
  9. Guest

    Gordon Ramsey

    Always used to like the guy, his tough but fair attitude and his F Word program was ace. However his recent comments and a couple of his interviews on Rove and Letterman have left me thinking he's actually a bit of a prick who needs to curb his ego and focus on his cooking. Anyone else of the same opinion?
  10. I do not think the recession in Australia will be anywhere as big as the UK, Gordon Brown is a clown and his refusal to raise personal tax while giving billions to unnecessary benefits to everyone and his dog has ruined the economy of this once great and prudent Country, I did not realise till I got back how bad this labour goverment is……Goodbye you Scottish idiot at the next election.
  11. Guest

    Gordon Brown Song

    PLEASE READ THIS AS IF YOU ARE SINGING GOLDON BROWN BY THE STRANGLERS. Gordon Brown you are a knob. U are crap, please quit your job. If you do not, us brits will fly where it is safe, warm and dry. Always a frown with gordon brown. Gordon brown, you are a dick. You really do, make us all sick. we brits do think, the u.k`s on the brink. Why cant you see, that this is our plee. Always a frown with gordon brown. Gordon Brown its not just you. Theres another, thats just as poo. His name is Darling, with a nice parting. He has white hair, that makes us stare. We will all drown, with that dick Brown. Alistair, you are the same,this countries shagged and you are to blame. Why cant you see, that OZ is the key. Please do dispare, theres no room for you there. So please no more tax, its breaking our backs. Please get the UK, back on its trax. The end. :err:
  12. I was sent this yesterday thought you mite like to read it Britain Needs A Leader Like This! Prime Minister John Howard - Australia Muslims who want to live under Islamic Sharia law were told on Wednesday to get out of Australia , as the government targeted radicals in a bid to head off potential terror attacks. <B> Separately, Howard angered some Australian Muslims on Wednesday by saying he supported spy agencies monitoring the nation's mosques. Quote: 'IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT. Take It Or Leave It. I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some individual or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Bali , we have experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of Australians.' </B> 'This culture has been developed over two centuries of struggles, trials and victories by millions of men and women who have sought freedom' <B> 'We speak mainly ENGLISH, not Spanish, Lebanese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society . Learn the language!' 'Most Australians believe in God. This is not some Christian, right wing, political push, but a fact, because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, because God is part of our culture.' 'We will accept your beliefs, and will not question why. All we ask is that you accept ours, and live in harmony and peaceful enjoyment with us.' 'This is OUR COUNTRY, OUR LAND, and OUR LIFESTYLE, and we will allow you every opportunity to enjoy all this. But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about Our Flag, Our Pledge, Our Christian beliefs, or Our Way of Life, I highly encourage you take advantage of one other great Australian freedom, 'THE RIGHT TO LEAVE'.' 'If you aren't happy here then LEAVE. We didn't force you to come here. You asked to be here. So accept the country YOU accepted.' </B> **********************************************************************
  13. koalakids

    Gordon & The Donkey Raffle

    The Donkey Raffle A young man named Gordon bought a donkey from an old farmer for £100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day. When the farmer drove up the next day, he said, "Sorry son, but I have some bad news... the donkey is on my truck, but he's dead." Gordon replied, "Well then, just give me my money back." The farmer said, "I can't do that. I went and spent it already." Gordon said, "OK then, just unload the donkey anyway". The farmer asked, "What are you going to do with him?" Gordon said, "I'm going to raffle him off." To which the farmer exclaimed, "You can't raffle off a dead donkey!" But Gordon , with a big smile on his face, said "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody that he's dead." A month later the farmer met up with Gordon and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?" Gordon said, "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two pounds a piece and made a huge profit" Totally amazed, the farmer asked, "Didn't anyone complain that you had stolen their money because you lied about the donkey being dead?" And Gordon replied, "The only guy who found out about the donkey being dead was the raffle winner, when he came to claim his prize. So I gave him his £2 back plus £200 extra, which is double the going value of a donkey, so he thought I was a great guy." Gordon grew up and eventually became the Chancellor of the Exchequer, and no matter how many times he lied or how much money he stole from British voters, as long as he gave them back some of the stolen money, most of them thought he was a great guy.
  14. While on his morning walk, Prime Minister Gordon Brown falls over, has a heart attack and dies because the accident and emergency dept at his nearest hospital is too understaffed to treat him in time. So his soul arrives in Heaven and he is met by Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. "Welcome to Heaven," says Saint Peter, "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a Socialist around these parts, so we're not sure what to do with you." "No problem, just let me in; I'm a good Christian; I'm a believer," says the PM. "I'd like to just let you in, but I have orders from God Himself. He says that since the implementation of his new HEAVEN CHOICES policy, you have to spend one day in Hell and one day in Heaven. Then you must choose where you'll live for eternity." "But I've already made up my mind. I want to be in Heaven," replies Brown. "I'm sorry .. But we have our rules," Peter interjects. And, with that, St. Peter escorts him to an elevator and he goes down, down, down ...all the way to Hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a lush golf course. The sun is shining in a cloudless sky. The temperature is a perfect 22C degrees. In the distance is a beautiful club-house. Standing in front of it is Harold Wilson and thousands of other Socialist luminaries who had helped him out over the years --- John Smith, Michael Foot, Jim Callaghan, etc. The whole of the Labour Party leaders were there .. Everyone laughing, happy, and casually but expensively dressed. They run to greet him, to hug him and to reminisce about the good times they had getting rich at the expense of 'suckers and peasants.' They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar. The Devil himself comes up to Brown with a frosty drink, "Have a tequila and relax, Gord!" "Uh, I can't drink anymore, I took a pledge," says Brown, dejectedly. "This is Hell, son. You can drink and eat all you want and not worry and it just gets better from there!" Brown takes the drink and finds himself liking the Devil, who he thinks is a really very friendly bloke who tells funny jokes like himself and pulls hilarious nasty pranks, kind of like the ones the Labour Party pulled with the European Constitution and the Education, Immigration, Tough on Crime promises. They are having such a great time that, before he realises it, it's time to go. Everyone gives him a big hug and waves as Brown steps on the elevator and heads upward. When the elevator door reopens, he is in Heaven again and Saint Peter is waiting for him. "Now it's time to visit Heaven," the old man says, opening the gate. So for 24 hours Brown is made to hang out with a bunch of honest, good-natured people who enjoy each other's company, talk about things other than money and treat each other decently. Not a nasty prank or short-arse joke among them. No fancy country clubs here and, while the food tastes great, it's not caviar or lobster. And these people are all poor. He doesn't see anybody he knows and he isn't even treated like someone special! "Whoa," he says uncomfortably to himself. "Harold Wilson never prepared me for this!" The day done, Saint Peter returns and says, "Well, you've spent a day in Hell and a day in Heaven. Now choose where you want to live for Eternity." With the 'Deal or No Deal' theme playing softly in the background, Brown reflects for a minute ... Then answers: "Well, I would never have thought I'd say this -- I mean, Heaven has been delightful and all -- but I really think I belong in Hell with my friends." So Saint Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down, all the way to Hell. The doors of the elevator open and he is in the middle of a barren scorched earth covered with garbage and toxic industrial wasteland, looking a bit like the eroded, rabbit and fox affected Australian outback, but worse and more desolate. He is horrified to see all of his friends, dressed in rags and chained together, picking up the roadside rubbish and putting it into black plastic bags. They are groaning and moaning in pain, faces and hands black with grime. The Devil comes over to Brown and puts an arm around his shoulder." I don't understand," stammers a shocked Brown, "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a club-house and we ate lobster and caviar and drank tequila. We lazed around and had a great time. Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and everybody looks miserable!" The Devil looks at him, smiles slyly and purrs, "Yesterday we were campaigning; today you voted for us!"
  15. GORDON CHATER’S CHUCKLE AT THE WORLD By Desmond Zwar Actor Gordon Chater is sitting in his high-backed white throne, looking out at the pelicans on Australia’s Gold Coast, tapping at his word-processor with its mean little screen; laughing at what he’s been writing in one of his interminable letters. And ready to talk about his Life ‘(The Almost Late) Gordon Chater’; and the ‘wonderful, unbelievable’ advance cheques that have come in from the publisher. He’s so excited, Luvvie, with this new literary action that he is - at 74 - planning a novel. The roly-poly actor assures his audience that ‘one is terribly blessed, being able to laugh.’ Everyone should do it a lot more. ‘I’m told that laughter is a sort of internal aerobics; expands circulation,’ he chuckles, ‘quickens the heart and boosts the immune system.’ Jolly as ever, but having to suck in medication in the mornings for his asthma and emphysema, he admits the day starts badly; with hot sweats and a lot of coughing. But his little upstairs seaside flat is spotless; the dishes have been washed from breakfast, the bathroom cleaned and food for lunch prepared. He’s ready to have the first big laugh at the day. ‘You’ve got to hear about my amazing experience!’ he shouts at me from an armchair not two metres away, the rounded English tones delivered as from the stage. ‘Ha! Ha! I was coming out of Woolworth’s check-out the other morning, and I was approached by the grubbiest, dirtiest young man that I have ever seen! In this day and age, one thinks one is going to be stabbed, you know. Or at least mugged. But there were a lot of people around and I didn’t think he’d do it with them watching. He said: "Have you lost something?" (Well, I thought...maybe my marbles). "What do you mean?" He said: "Check your pockets.’’ So I carefully put down my plastic bags and I thought: "That’s good, he’s not going to stab me. Just rob me." ‘I found that although I had been given two $20 bills in change at the counter, I only had one of them. The young man handed me $20 and said I’d left it on the check-out. I said: "You have it. Or at least take $10 for a drink. I am very grateful." ‘He said: "No. No. I couldn’t bear to deprive anyone as decrepit as you.’’ That’s missing from the 340 pages of his book he tapped out in 3 1/2 months at 1,000 words a day. But the fact that he arrived stillborn into the world in London is, and how he was revived by a midwife and went on to Cambridge to study medicine, which he failed. And his 18,000 theatre performances all over the world; and the hit television series The Mavis Bramston Show, so embedded in the Australian memory that a taxi-driver picked him up the other day and asked if he was the Gordon Chater. Easing his bulk into the front seat Chater admitted to it. ‘Gord, I thought you was dead years ago!’ said the driver through the actor’s cruelly accurate mimicry. The only time he fell out with television was when he broke the network edict that no cast member should talk to the Press without permission from Publicity. ‘The phone rang early in the morning and I answered it half-asleep. A reporter wanted my reaction to an outcry - particularly from Sydney’s Bishop Muldoon - about the content of the show. He said: "The Bishop’s selling his shares in Ampol (a sponsor)." I replied that it was very immoral for a Catholic bishop to have shares at all.’ It made the noonday edition, and there was trouble.’ In six years at the Gold Coast he’s unpredictably kept away from theatre. ‘I’ve been up to Brisbane three times - to see Warren Mitchell and Jilly Perryman, and of course to see Barry Creyton, who I regard as a surrogate son, in Blithe Spirit. I watch ‘Sale of the Century’ on television; it’s my bible. I shout the answers at the screen.’ And if the mind is rusty about a date he rummages through the full set of Encyclopaedia Britannica which he bought because he always promised to do so if he had enough money. He has always been a letter writer and (‘thank God! for my book’) a lot of people he wrote to, kept his letters. ‘I wrote every month to my Godson until he was 21, because I thought I should. And to my parents, once a week, all through the war and when I came out to Australia 50 years ago.’ That, apparently, was a mistake - the Australian arrival. He’d gone aboard a ship when he was demobbed from the Navy, which he thought was heading for Shanghai. A sailor told him as it pulled away: ‘Shang’ai, mate? You’re goin’ to ****ing Fremantle.’
  16. Stuju

    The Gordon Brown Story !!!

    The Gordon Brown Story – Oh ye who have faith in politicians. Gordon Brown bought an old donkey from a farmer for £100, but when the farmer delivered the donkey the following day it had died on the way. G.B. asked for his money back, but the farmer said he had spent it, so G.B. said to unload the dead donkey anyway. The farmer asked what GB was going to do with the dead donkey. GB said “I am going to raffle it off”. The farmer said “you cannot raffle off a dead donkey”. GB said “of course I can – just watch me – I won’t bother to tell anyone it is dead”. A month later the farmer met up with GB and asked him what had happened with the raffle. GB said “I raffled him off and sold 500 raffle tickets at £2 each, and made a huge profit on the raffle”. The farmer was totally amazed and asked “did nobody complain you had stolen their money because you had lied about the donkey being dead ?” GB said “the winner was the only one to find out the donkey was dead when he came to collect the donkey. So I gave him back his £2 raffle ticket money plus an extra £200 which as you know is double the going rate for a donkey, so he thought I was a great guy”. Gordon Brown eventually became the Chancellor of the Exchequer, and no matter how many times he lied, or how much money he stole from the British voters, as long as he gave them back some of the stolen money, most of them unfortunately still thought he was a great guy. The moral of this story ? If you think that GB is about to play fair and do something for the British voters, think again, because in reality you would be better off flogging a dead donkey I thought this was very good :biglaugh:
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