Alex jamieson

Hi, Eltham is a great place to move to!! Some great hidden paths and roads.. I go to the library with the kids a lot- it’s lush! I too worked in Heidelberg for a while! It would be great to catch up for drinks, coffee. Cheers.

Hey there Poms and etal , I was wondering if there are any meet up groups ( or if anyone is interested in starting 1 or meeting) around Northeast subs of Vic? I live inHurstbridge- been in Oz 6 years now and still not really making any connections ( we have moved around a bit)- I also work from home which doesn’t help! I’m a typical Geordie lass ( not so much a lass these days!) - like to drink and have a laugh. Is there anyone out there??? !! cheers, Alexsandra

Thinker 78- ( and everyone) you have read my thoughts and think exactly the same things I do about Aus.. lots of us seem to feel and experience the same. I guess the difference for us is we’d be returning to 2 ageing mums who require care and support- and we would have less support in the UK than we have here currently. We have no cousins, only my sister who would be tremendous with the kids if we lived close enough. The kids have friends here who are like cousins - so leaving them would be upsetting for them, I tell myself kids make friends easy ( even my big girl with Autism to some extent) and the UK is much friendlier and fun.. god I hear you about not knowing your neighbours., it’s so sad .. and the workplace- just no fun, no banter, no bonding, and so many petty rules, protocols and bureaucracy., drives me nuts! Im very aware of the UK issues and not under any romantic illusions.. that’s the worry- it’s grim in places, hard, busy, cold, and who knows with Brexit.. but the impression I get with my tribe back home is they are just getting on with life as usual- they’re not unhappy, stressed, or any different to when we left., it’s us who are different and constantly compare the 2 countries. If id known emigrating would be like this - if someone had said you’ll be stuck in limbo, constantly homesick, distraught saying goodbye- year in- year out, you’ve never make the same kind of friends, you’ll always feel like something is missing, you’ll struggle with work and never laugh at work anymore.. ( I can go on and on) but mostly you’ll lose your sense of belonging, your very core will become unearthed, and your continuing indecisiveness will disrupt your every day quality of life. Happy days!!

All great advice- thanks. i definitely have guilt about my mum who is in her 80’s and has no supports- my kids are the only grandchildren on both sides too. She has visited us a few times and we’ve been back every year! But she’s becoming reluctant to travel now so this is very hard to manage. I feel sad my kids won’t know their grannies, and other close friends- but they have their own friends here now and 1 family who have become like family to them. I would work in public services so I realise work could be really stressful in the UK- but I hate my job in Aus and have not found my feet career wise over here. I love a lot about Aus- the space, wildlife, climate, peacefulness, life is easy really.. but it feels empty, I haven’t made a really close friend- and miss my nights in the pub- laughing a lot.. there’s not much of that over here. I can be content here., I may be chasing a dream back home- and the reality is life will be harder, more stressful, and restrictive to an indoors existence.. but these things never bothered us before.. or is it changing with Brexit? And the kids... they love their lives here.,, can I really disrupt that for an unknown future.. I just don’t know. 1 day I’m all UK- next it’s Aus.. I can’t live a lifetime like this!! We wouldn’t be able to afford to return if we leave- we’ve been unlucky in real estate ( in WA) and lost all our capital so we’re starting from scratch again if we return. Will I ever decide.. I just don’t know.

Thank you both for replies.. it’s good to hear from someone with a child with Autism as that’s the biggest fear. Her current school is amazing and we’ve been lucky to make lovely friends from there. yes- we plan to move somewhere new if/when we return- has to be quiet as no longer can tolerate lots of people! I’m part Scottish so always appeals! Thanks

Hi, i am living in limbo after 5 years of trying to settle in Oz. Our family of 4 live in Victoria- after 2 years in WA initially. We have made a good life here, good jobs, nice home, some friends, and the kids are happy and thriving. But I’m not. I’ve constantly tormented about staying or returning to the UK. Ive all but decided I need to go back- Aus will never feel like home, I belong in the UK, and miss fun, family friends, and laughter too much. However my OH doesn’t want to return ( although he will if I insist) and I’m so worried I’ll be messing my kids lives up. my eldest daughter has Autism- she is doing well , has good friends and attends an alternative primary school. The wee un only knows Aus- she is very sporty and outdoorsy - she adores our closet friends and their kids/ sees them as her family. If we go back it has to be next year as they’d start High S and Primary - as 1st years in the UK. I also feel I have to go to support my ageing mum who has no other support and some special needs. The guilt of not being there for her is also all consuming. so I wonder when others have faced these dilemmas what they have done? I feel like I would be sacrificing my happiness if I stay in Aus- but I wonder if I’m sacrificing my children’s happiness and opportunities if we return to the UK. We have applied for citizenship - so we’d always have the option of returning - Albeit impractical with my eldest daughter who has already endured about 7 different schools. All advice welcomed. thanks