Aaronandvanessa

I hope that isn't a question the court focuses on, because although that would be the outcome that isn't the reason for the move. I don't think taking her away from one of her parents is right, but I do believe over time moving will be more benefical for her happiness as well as our families. It's a catch 22 for me as staying means never getting the chance at new beginnings which has amazing opportunities for my family as a whole, and leaving means I'm taking my child away from her father and other siblings, which would cause a lot of upset.

The move is most definitely not to get away from him, if anything it would be amazing for him and his family to turn around and say.. oh yeah we would love to move over to Oz too, so it could be a win win for us all, but unfortunately to our despair that's not the case. Our fresh start is in regards to new people, new surroundings, and a chance to start again, as a lot of things have happened here which we feel continue to weigh us down. For all we know we may move and feel we may the wrong decision, but we do not want to live the rest of our life wondering what if. I don't think removing her from her father and siblings would be better for her, I just feel as a family we would all benefit more from the move if that makes sense. Once we have figured out our finances from work and all our outgoings, if we cannot guarantee her return every year, then I would not want to go. That would be our first and main priority. I would never worry about her saying she didn't want to return, as I know how much she loves her dad and extended family and would look forward to seeing them again, regardless of my views, they are mine and I have always allowed her to make her own mind up.

Well, this post was created to gain some advice from people who have been in a similar situation as ours. There is only so much information that can be provided on here without writing our whole life story out. Please don't be patronising as if to say we have not considered how we would feel if the shoe was on the other foot and she was being the one taken away to another country, it would be naive to think her father would be jumping with excitement. The maintenance may be a totally separate issue, but I am providing a small amount of insight into what my daughter's father actually does for her himself. I think as a parent with their childs best interests at heart, they would want the best possibility at a better life for their child, & if the other parent can offer that then why deny your child that chance. He has told me to leave her with him, and go to Australia without her, so if he can have her full time, then why does he not have her more often now. This Is a man who lived at his mums house on the same street as her school, and in 3 years has only taken and picked her up a handful of times, regardless of me asking him to share so of the responsibility more often, and who also has dropped her off and picked her up late. If I can manage every day to get her to school on time and pick her up so should he. That as well as previous comments I have outlined, such as lack of hygiene (me having to send her with a toothbrush as she never had one) also repeatedly coming back with headlice, not having any clothes there only the ones I have provided and that have not been returned, and no bed to sleep in as she told me she slept on a beanbag. So do you think this is acceptable and me being a responsible parent leaving her with her father full time? Maybe we worded the work life balance wrong. What we meant was.. that our children love being outdoors, and the weather in Australia offers us more opportunity to be outdoors with our children, rather than constantly being cooped up in play houses for the 8 months it rains in the UK. We know of a couple and a few people who have moved to Oz and have said it was the best choice they ever made, and made us aware that the first 12 months wouldn't be easy going, but thereafter would definitely be worth it. Whilst taking her away from her father isn't an easy decision we take lightly, it is one we are willing to consider if we believe It will be a better outcome for our children in the long run. & our son is also not going to be seeing his family, so we also have to consider how he would be impacted too. It is a big decision for everyone, and I don't think asking me the question "do you think taking her away from one of her parents is right?" Is the real question here. The question is, do you think taking my child to another country will be more beneficial for her than her staying in the UK, and the answer is yes, I really do.

Unfortunately, she comes home after the two days at her dads lacking basic hygiene such as bathing, washing hair, brushing teeth etc. Also with uncompleted homework, and on previous occasions has been dropped off and picked up from school late, so leaving her with her dad wouldn't be an option for me.

Thank you for your response, you had provided us with some really useful information. I'm sorry to hear what you have been through, but glad to hear the courts were supportive in your case. Yeah, I understand that it may be hard going, and I have my daughter's best interests at heart, which is why we have outlined all the pros and cons in order to get her to understand what the move will mean for her, as she is young, I don't think she will properly understand until it has happened. Of course I agree. That is definitely something I wasn't aware of, so I definitely think I need to do more research into what it may mean If the move is possible. Thanks for outlining that.

Of course, or we wouldn't have wasted our time researching the move, or asking for some general advice on here.

We want to emigrate to Australia and have done for a long time now. The reason for the move is for a fresh start and a better work life balance in order to spend more time together as a family due to the long hours we work here in the UK. We have two children a girl aged 8 from a previous relationship and our son whose soon turning 4. We've explained to her about wanting move to Australia and wrote down pros and cons and also made her a slide to better understand what it would mean. We also asked her what would make her happy and sad about the move so we could write it down. We've looked into housing,work,schooling,wages etc to find out how often we could return her to the UK to see her father and other family. Spoke daughters dad and asked him now he would feel about this and even said that we are more than happy for him and his family to fly out and stay with us for holidays as well us returning his daughter along with daily contact with such things as Skype and WhatsApp. However he is adiment against this or any proposal we have tried to make. He currently has a girlfriend and they have 3 children and one on the way (only two children are his). He currently sees his daughter from a Friday to Sunday every two weeks. He's moved around 45 minutes away and has started making excuses about picking her up and dropping her off which mean him asking us to make the travel. He has not payed any maintainance since January this year and has only ever paid it for no more then two years. Our daughter talks about his girlfriend, her sister and step siblings more than her father, she had never been his first priority but none the less she enjoys spending time there. Has anyone had any experience with this before? Court is our last option. What's the likelyness of a court granting us permission? Thanks