Coops13

Evening all… Returned to Melbourne after 20 years in the UK. I married whilst there so came back as a family with our two kids. things didn’t go to plan as I loved it and slotted straight back in, the kids (11 and 7) loved it but after 2 years my wife wanted to go back to North Wales. I couldn’t do it and the next three years were spent in court with a Hague convention hearing in London to get my children back after she did a runner with them and a further two years court time in Australia as the fight to keep them here continued. Long story short, I am now a full time single dad of two and loving it. Work full time in a job I love, live on the beautiful Mornington peninsula and both children are doing great in school and University. My ex moved back to her small village in Nth Wales which is a shame for the children but….life goes on. Australia is far from perfect and is expensive and living in Victoria as I do it is run by fools but hey….isn’t everywhere. The lifestyle is the kicker for me. If outdoors and easy going is an attractive option then you can’t go wrong. Good luck to you all and nothing ventured….nothing gained. Maybe avoid Victoria (also now known as the lockdown state) for while if you do come over

Hi DrDougster.... Am I reading your first line correctly and that mortgage interest on a UK investment property can be claimed as a tax deduction in Australia despite this no longer being allowed in the UK. I had thought that one would have filed their UK tax return and all the ATO would look at would be the final number. Would love to learn a little more about this as I can't believe I've not picked up on this before. Thanks in advance......

Thanks all. Her mother lives in the UK so we should be able to sort something to cover the residency part of things and she's going to be in the UK for around 8 - 10 weeks so we should be OK with the timings. Agree completely about the passing a test doesn't mean you can drive and she would be on Red P's in Victoria given the rules here which is fine by me. Thanks again and am just spit balling ideas at the moment....

Morning all... My daughter has just turned 18 and is keen to get her driving licence and is considering the possibility of going through one of the intensive course whilst on holiday in the UK which would remove the need for the 120 hrs of log book work here. Has anyone considered this option and see any roadblocks with it (excuse the pun) Thanks in advances.

Afternoon all.... Apologies if this is already covered but, need to make some regular transfers (AUD to GBP) over the next few weeks and had used XE.com in years gone by but wondered if there were any clear leaders on this front now. Need to make a big one at the end of this week so a quick set up would also need to be a given as of course are charges and exchange rates. Thanks in advance

Hi Aussiepom.... Thanks for the post and I'm hoping this could be a help to me. Just arrived home to a letter advising me that my mortgage has passed the end of it's term. I will review the details tonight and will definitely be in touch. Cheers S

Evening all.... Just wondering if anyone has any experience of divorcing or organising a financial settlement when the other person is living in the UK. Short version of the situation is as follows..... Moved to Australia in 2011. Separated from my wife in Sept 2014. She is now living and working in the UK. I am living and working in Australia. Both children (15 and 11 years old) live with me. (Court Orders in place) We have property in the UK and Australia. I don't care about a divorce but I do want to start on the road to financial separation and am looking into whether I should instruct a UK lawyer or use an Australian/International firm to go through this process. I would like to think it could be amicable and will start down that route but previous history would suggest it is not likely. Anyone have any experience or recommendations...? The other area of interest is Child Support. She refuses to pay anything towards the children's care despite being employed as a Teacher. My believe is she thinks that the money she spends on flights to see the children is in lieu of child support which is ridiculous as it was her decision to move to the UK.....the children were not taken away from her The CSA in Australia have accepted my case and arrears have started to accrue, however, the calculations are still based on her income being zero. Does anyone have any experience of chasing a partner who is based in the UK and how successful the CSA are at enforcing things. Lots to find out and thought this might be a good place to start. Thanks in advance

Wow....aren't you the ray of sunshine this morning. I would have thought that doing your own due diligence around a topic gaining a better understanding before you progress down such an expensive route is surely common sense. If you have nothing better to contribute parleycross I would suggest you say nothing.:wink:

Not expecting anyone to answer the question in detail but it's always good to be in touch with people that have been through the process themselves. I'm tired of learning from my own mistakes and forums are great for sharing the experience we all gain from a broader pool of experience. Cheers

If only it was that simple. The balance isn't right as there are a number of properties in the UK and just the two in Aus. Would have been nice to have had that option though..!

Evening all.... I was wondering if anyone has any experience of, not so much completing an international divorce, as I know that is pretty straight forward. My query relates more to the property settlement. One party is UK based and the other is Aus based and there are properties in both UK and Aus. I am trying to get my head around whether I should try and do it in Australia but from what I've read, an Australian court order in relation to property overseas can be difficult to enforce. I will of course get legal advice but this is part of own due diligence before hand. Thanks in advance.

Hi Tina2..... That is a very good question and I would like to say that the simple answer is of course yes, however, there are a lot of legal guarantees that will need to be put in place before this was to take place. Given the fact she abducted them in the first place my first priority needs to be to safeguard the children so it can never happen again. Finances also come into this as the whole process has crippled us, so something as simple as actually buying the tickets is now a huge undertaking. Having said that I do believe that in an perfect world children would have a both a mother and a father in their lives, but I think we all know there's no such thing as 'perfect' world and it remains to be seen how things progress from here.

Delighted to update you all and let you know that both children are now home in Australia. It was an extremely emotional reunion for them both and they are now back to some kind of normality and have picked up where they left off before the whole saga began and are immersed themselves in their school and circle of friends. I would just like to say thank you for all the support I have been given both publicly and via PM's. It has been a long process and an extremely taxing one both emotionally and financially and one that needn't have happened. However, it's all behind us now and we move onto the next hurdle, but we do do so knowing that the children are well cared for and are in a settled environment. Thanks again....

A quick update on my situation and whilst I'm delighted to say that my 10 year old son is back home in Australia and he is beaming, my 14 year old daughter is still in the UK and I continue to fight to have her returned. We were successful in having an order approved by the High Court after my wife agreed to voluntarily allow the children to return. She had no choice but to agree as the judge effectively said she had no case and would have made the judgement anyway. The three of us were booked to fly home on Boxing Day but unfortunately my daughter could not stand up to the pressure that was being place upon her. Despite her being adamant in her CAFCASS report that Australia was home, she wanted to be there and most of all she never wanted to be separated from her brother, she told me that she couldn't leave her Mum who has from day one been telling the children that should they go home to Australia she wouldn't come back and they would not see her for a long time. That is a hard things to put on a sensitive and already emotional 14 year old. After plenty of discussion I agreed to allow Alex to stay but advised her that the court case would now start again. My wife contacted a top law firm in London and arranged to have Alex represented as an individual but this needed to be agreed by a judge. They all went to court last week and the Judge made it clear in no uncertain terms that this was ridiculous. He said that he could see absolutely no reason for Alex to have individual representation and he asked to speak to Alex in private to ascertain her reasons for changing her mind. He said some lovely things about how well she was handling things and how eloquent she had been in their meeting and he stated that he had absolutely no doubt at all that Alex wanted to be in Australia. His judgement was that the original order stands and that Alex is to be collected by me in two weeks and flown home. The issue of parental responsibility was one that he kept referring to and stated that it was disappointing to see that despite agreeing to have the children return home, my wife continues to encourage and pressure my daughter instead of accepting the decision and making the transition an easy one. I am desperate to get my daughter out of the toxic environment she is in and get her home to her brother and am hoping that things go smoothly although I am not holding my breath.

Hi Would be happy to share my experiences of things to date and will PM you tonight. I'm actually in the UK at the moment spending time with them things are in motion with the Hague Application....! The link that is above to the other thread is an interesting one as well. Chin up and stay positive as the law is on your side and you need to stay focussed and try and keep the emotion out of the process and get all your facts rights. Having said that......I think I've openly cried in front of pretty much everyone I spoke to about it in the first four weeks.

I have had some fantastic support my family and I would expect nothing less as this is what families do at a time of need. I have also had some great support from many of my wife's closest friends who are now aware of what has happened and are shocked at her actions regardless of the reasons she has given. I have also been very grateful to those people on the forum who have taken the time to comment, give their thoughts or advice or simply shown some compassion by sending good wishes but, there is one thing that really irks me somewhat and that is when people suggest that I should up and move back to the UK in order to be close to my children....? That I should simply leave my job which is the only financial security we have and walk away from the house and area that we have invested so much in...? I am not the one that has loaded my children onto a plane in tears having made up a story as there was no way they would have gone had they know what was planned. I haven't pulled them out of their settled environment and left all their friends behind without even the opportunity to say goodbye, not to mention tearing them away from a father with whom they have always had the very closest of relationships. How anyone could suggest that I should just shrug my shoulders and say....OK then...I'll come over there....? That is the whole reason for the Hague Convention. To stop people just running away and to provide some stability and structure for the children whilst the parents sort out their differences whether that be through separation and divorce or sorting things out. I would be just as unhappy to return to the UK as I don't like living there but more importantly I can't provide for my family to the same degree that I can here. I have been trying to get back to Australia for many years but never once did I consider snatching the children. I wonder how many people would be suggesting my wife should just pack up and follow me had I have done this when I was so low at being stuck in the UK.

For me it is all about the kids and I can honestly say with total conviction that if I could provide for my children the same financial, emotional and physical support in the UK as I can and have always done here in Australia then I would go and sacrifice my own plans for their benefit. The truth of the matter in my situation anyway is that this just isn't the case as the location my wife insists on being is where all her family are and this little town is and will always be a deprived area with high unemployment and a very run down and decaying feel to it. I'm not fighting to get one over on my wife as that's not who I am. Nor am I fighting to get what want. I am fighting to give my children the very best opportunities both for now and in the future and is this 'moral high ground' that both sustains me and upsets me as it isn't being shown by my partner. People are selfish and it is heartbreaking when it is someone who you have loved for so long that is doing it.....! I am still waiting for my Hague application to be processed and have finally opted to see a solicitor outside of this later this week to see what else can be done. Money is always an issue and foolishly I left my bank access and credit cards open for Lisa to use if necessary for the children but she has taken all the money out of the UK account and taken the Australian credit cards to their limit on a two day shopping spree. I need to harden up or I will have nothing left.....! It's all just so selfish....

This is all still very raw for me as I am in the middle of trying to have my two children returned to Australia. I can understand the frustrations of being held in a situation which is clearly not in the child's best interest such as no financial stability, lack of effort on the other parent and even violence. However, in my scenario my children are at the centre of everything I do, they are my whole world and we have a fantastic relationship. Unfortunately it would appear that my wife and I have just....drifted apart, and due to her desire to be closer to here family, my children have been simply snatched away and held in another country which is totally unacceptable and is the single most selfish thing one parent could ever do. A parent that truly had their child's best interest at heart would have filed for separation/divorce where they were living and where the children were settled and had a support network; secured custody and then request the right to move to overseas. If they could prove that they could support the children and clearly show that such a move was in the best interests of the children they would be granted the rights to move. It they couldn't prove this then they would be required to stay as it will have been deemed the best for the child. How a 'loving' parent can put their own wishes and happiness ahead of their child's is something I will never be able to understand.

My wife has the passports so this isn't an option although, if I'm being totally honest I would have considered it. I have again had to sit through another Skype call with my son sobbing as he wants to come home and doesn't understand why he's not allowed to. He said he feels trapped and like a prisoner and that any time he mentions Australia to anyone they all start saying why it's such a horrible place. I just want to clarify a couple of things that have come up in conversations with some on this site both on this thread and off it. We moved to Australia to provide our family with a better life. One with financial security, good education (I don't want a debate on this point. Suffice to say my children were both in very good schools), and a better lifestyle which is largely related to the weather and access to a more outdoors life. We have achieved all this as I have a well paid and secure job that provides me with plenty of flexiblity, we live on the Mornington Peninsula which is a stunning part of the world and the schools are great, and we have extended family here as well as the UK. The 'option' of moving back to the UK just isn't a viable one. The area where I would have to move back to is classed as 'deprived area' with poor schools, high crime and little if any real job prospects. My wanting to have my children returned is not a selfish one as I 'just prefer it here'. I want them here because it is the only place that I can provide for them and it ultimately will provide them with more opportunities going forwards. I have lived in the UK for 20 years and the for the last 10 of those I wanted to come back to Australia. My wife didn't so we couldn't. At no time did I consider abducting my children and forcing her to come. What example am I setting....! I would like to again thank you for the comments and support. I have decided to 'go public' with what's happened and will be speaking with our mutual friends both here and in the UK and letting them form their own opinion and just hope that maybe some of them will speak with her. I am struggling to cope with this on my own and people are offering support without even knowing the truth and I need to take it. My sons classmates have all asked if they can do a fortnightly skype video to send over which is great and it's this sort of thing that will make a world of difference to them . Thanks again.... :notworthy:

Thanks for those that have taken the time to respond. By way of an update and a little background I have now been in touch with the ISS who are Australia's International Parental Child Abduction Legal Assistance Service organisation. They provide free legal advice and assist in the preparation of the application for the return of the children through the Hague Convention. Whilst their services are free this means that they have a backlog and it is not expected that my application will be lodged until the end of November with an expectation that the whole process will take in the region of six months. This has been a real blow and the thought of being away from them for so long is just tearing me to pieces. I have had no contact from my wife other than a letter from a solicitor firm offering me some random custody rights should I agree to let them stay. I have not and will not respond to this. My children have been very resilient to date as children often are and I have spoken to then briefly about the situation and assured them that they will be coming home and they should just treat this as an extended holiday. They are both starting school this Friday and it is clear that real efforts are being made to 'settle' them back into some kind of normality which is good but totally unrealistic when they have left their dad, dog, home and friends on the other side of the world with no opportunity to say goodbye. Both have said they want to return but I can see that this could change over a six month period. I have no idea what to do for the best....? Speak with them honestly and openly or try not to include them too much in what is going on as I have been advised that as they are both under 16 they don't have to make the decision as to where they live. In a way, I am pleased about that as no child should be put in such a difficult position. My children are 14 and 10 years old. I have had to continue the 'ruse' of telling friends that they will be staying in the UK for an extended period due to family illness but people aren't silly. Those that do know such as the childrens school have been very understanding but I can't help feeling that I am also being judged. People just won't believe that a mother would run off with the children without there being anything serious wrong. Other than her missing her mother and us having drifted apart there is nothing serious wrong. I am not abusive in anyway at all, I don't drink or have some addictive side. My children are my world and I am at a loss as to what to do. I can't go downstairs as I had filled the front room with camping equipment as we were due to go camping for the school holidays. I can't bear to look at it...... Whilst I have been advised that the return should be a formality.....I am scared for the future and am still just numb that this has happened. I have no idea as to how she is going to fund this either as she has no job and we have very little funds available in the UK and cashflow in Oz is tight. I/we simply cannot afford to run another 'household' in the UK. Thanks again for those that have dropped a note through. One thing that has come out of this is how genuinely good most people are. My work and friends of both my wife and mine have been so supportive......even if I can't actually talk to anyone about the real situation.

Hi everyone.... I have already posted the note below in the 'Moving Back to the UK' section but was advised that I might have more luck attaching to this thread. Would be great to get some advice from anyone who can help.. [h=2]The Hague Convention; Child Abduction - Who has been through this....[/h] Hi everyone.... I have read through the various threads on the forum about The Hague Convention as it relates to Child Abduction and understand the process involved but would really like to speak with anyone who's been through it. Particularly interested in time-scales, support and effect on the children. Unfortunately it looks like I will be heading down this route now as my wife has taken our children to the UK under the ruse of her mother having had a heart attack. After two weeks of little or no contact and my own calls to the hospital having confirmed that there had been no emergency she told me this morning that she is not coming back. A lawyer in the UK has apparently told here that she has a good case and is willing to 'help' her (by help I think they mean charge) There has been no physical or psychological abuse and I had thought things had improved somewhat but clearly this wasn't the case.... Really hoping I can get some information from some of you. Feel free to PM me if you would prefer to keep it private. I'm still in shock and more than a little lost and scared of what lies ahead..... Thanks in advance

Hi everyone.... I have read through the various threads on the forum about The Hague Convention as it relates to Child Abduction and understand the process involved but would really like to speak with anyone who's been through it. Particularly interested in time-scales, support and effect on the children. Unfortunately it looks like I will be heading down this route now as my wife has taken our children to the UK under the ruse of her mother having had a heart attack. After two weeks of little or no contact and my own calls to the hospital having confirmed that there had been no emergency she told me this morning that she is not coming back. A lawyer in the UK has apparently told here that she has a good case and is willing to 'help' her (by help I think they mean charge) There has been no physical or psychological abuse and I had thought things had improved somewhat but clearly this wasn't the case.... Really hoping I can get some information from some of you. Feel free to PM me if you would prefer to keep it private. I'm still in shock and more than a little lost and scared of what lies ahead..... Thanks in advance

Am just swapping forums as posted this in the wrong one first time round...:arghh: [h=2][/h] Morning all... Have been in Oz for a few years now and have three properties in the UK all of which are let but I am certainly not using them efficiently from a tax perspective. I have a lot of equity tied up in them and would like to look at releasing much of this so I can reduce my personal residence mortgage here in Australia. I know quite a few of the banks stopped doing expat mortgages but there are still plenty out there if you know where to look! That is the problem and I'm hoping some of you can recommend a good mortgage broker. Someone that actually specialises in this area and can discuss the various options available. Thanks in advance Coops13 :biggrin:

Hi Iron Chef... Just curious about how one stands with regards to not mentioning the 'i' word if I was to have a claim...? I imported a Kia Sorento which is hardly an enthusiasts car but it balanced out financially and it was a bit of a test run really ahead of me importing my 'proper' car (I have just fired off for a quote on your website for this one!) :biggrin: Would they not void the insurance if I don't declare it as an import...? Thanks in advance.... Coops13

Hi Andy Thanks for the heads up. A little confused about how the reasons for the releasing equity comes into play. I have released equity from a property previously and it was never and issue and I just noted the increase in mortgage payment on the investment property on my tax as per normal...? With regards to the currency risk, I'll not mortgage up to the hilt in the UK so should be OK with regards to covering all costs at that end. And, painful as it it to exchange gbp to aud at the current exchange rate (I'm still living in 2:1 land! ;-) ) I still feel that at least my money will be working for me now as oppossed to sitting locked up in properties in the UK. Certainly no plans of going back to the UK. I'm an Adelaide boy originally and see that's your patch! Always interested on getting snippets from an expert....thanks again....much appreciated. Cheers Coops13